what's your favorite bad joke

[m-life]

2 atoms were walking down the street when one says "I've lost an electron" the other asks "are you sure?" The first replies "I'm positive".

 

[ReikiLady]

The past, the present and the future all got together ...... It was a tense meeting .....

Sent from my iPad using MiniMins

 

[Emmaline]

[h=2][/h]

What did one ocean say to the other ocean? Nothing, they just waved.

 

[scooter]

What do you do when your nose goes on strike?

Picket

 

[Emmaline]

Where does a microbe write about its feelings?
In a germ-nal.

 

[Mrs Z]

Any joke told by my husband - all equally as bad!

 

[Emmaline]

Any joke told by my husband - all equally as bad!

Why didn't you tell us one?



How do you start up a tree?

You log on.

 

[Emmaline]

What kind of chair travels through the air?

A thrown.

 

[Emmaline]

What has three balls and flies through space?
E.T. The Extra Testicle!

 

[Emmaline]

Three guys go to a ski lodge, and there aren't enough rooms, so they have to share a bed. In the middle of the night, the guy on the right wakes up and says, "I had this wild, vivid dream of getting a hand job!" The guy on the left wakes up, and unbelievably, he's had the same dream, too. Then the guy in the middle wakes up and says, "That's funny, I dreamed I was skiing!"

 

[Emmaline]

 

[Emmaline]

How do you know when you are going to drown in milk?

When its past your eyes!

 

[Emmaline]

Today a girl said she recognized me from vegetarian club, but I'm sure I've never met herbivore.

 

[Emmaline]

Knock knock.
Who's there?
Dwayne.
Dwayne who?
Dwayne the bathtub I'm dwowning!

 

[Emmaline]

What do you call a can opener that doesn't work?

A can't opener!

 

[pandauk]

Why did the baker have dirty hands?
Because he kneaded a poo!

 

[Emmaline]

A husband and wife are trying to set up a new password for their computer. The husband puts, "Mypenis," and the wife falls on the ground laughing because on the screen it says, "Error. Not long enough."

 

[rhiannanmoynan]

Why did the chicken cross the road?
To go and see his chicken friend

Knock knock..
Who's there?
Chicken!

 

[Emmaline]

The Boss to a lady aspirant to the post of a Secretary:

Boss: "What is the difference between a paper clip and a screw?"

Lady: "I do not know. I have never been paper clipped"

 

[Emmaline]