Hey,
Just wanting to say like the others, it's just a 'blip' everyone has them and will most probably have them. You just need to draw the line, get over it and carry on as you were. It's my first day of s&s today, but i will probably have a blip at some point, you're only human.
***I had a mc in February and I still blame myself, I keep thinking if only I had been that slimmer you that you use to be, it wouldn't have happened. ***
(hugs) You mus'nt blame yourself and think like that, it wasn't your fault, unfortunatley these things do happen not nice at all, I had a mc 3 years ago and thought exactly the same thing, 'If I wasn't fat, maybe the baby would have been ok/ I should have tried harder to diet and actually stick to it, then it may not have happened.' You can't blame yourself, it does get easier hun you will never forget, but time does heal.
Good luck in the rest of your journey.. xx