Wilma's time to shine.. lets do this!

[Sophiesophs]

Good luck for your weigh in!! Fingers crossed for a good one! You're doing really well,a few blips are fine it's just getting back on track that's the hard bit! I've been the same with the CWP in the past....self destruction seems to be my thing! Just as I'm getting somewhere I cave into food and then because I've caved I tell myself I've blown it and then eat more! But you're doing really well and hope you hear back from your job interview soon! X

 

[misswilma14]

Thanks Sophie! And that's exactly me! But I'm trying to get into the mindset whereby I allow myself something I want to eat, ie a planned meal, but tell myself it's just one meal weekly and then get straight back onto it! The idea really is that I don't get to the point where cravings get too strong and I eat because of loss of willpower - I think that because I'm allowed one 'cheat meal' it will keep my cravings at bay, satisfy myself and because it's planned, i won't feel like I'm out of control. Well.. That's the plan anyway haha! I'm still highly motivated so know for a fact I'll be able to get straight back on plan afterwards.

How is your cambridge journey?

 

[Sophiesophs]

I'm only on day two today but managed to cook dinner for the family last night without feeling deprived so good star for me! I have to see this one through this time without failing as my weight has gone out of control...I did slimming world just after Xmas but I just couldn't hack the 1/2 pound and one pound losses , I haven't got the patience to do it that way! I need the results quickly!

 

[tor137]

Ha ha nice to hear about normal things aswell as just diet related
I work in a hairdresser and I swear all women talk about is men and diets lol
Starting Wednesday and know this forum will keep me busy reading all the posts instead of eating

Keep posting ladies get me skinny !!

 

[misswilma14]

I'm only on day two today but managed to cook dinner for the family last night without feeling deprived so good star for me! I have to see this one through this time without failing as my weight has gone out of control...I did slimming world just after Xmas but I just couldn't hack the 1/2 pound and one pound losses , I haven't got the patience to do it that way! I need the results quickly!

Well congrats for getting through the first day, you did so well cooking dinner for everyone! I am grateful I live alone so don't have to cook or have goodies for the rest of the family in the house. Will be another story when I go back home for the summer.. but we'll get to that when it comes haha. I definitely think that one day at a time is the best motto. Some days absolutely drag where you're just clock watching but when you get into bed at night feeling proud for sticking to it 100% its all worth it I'm the same as well, SW is just far too slow. Would have taken me about 6 weeks to lose what I lost on the first week on Cambridge! Good luck on your journey anyway, keep me posted have you got a diary?

Ha ha nice to hear about normal things aswell as just diet related
I work in a hairdresser and I swear all women talk about is men and diets lol
Starting Wednesday and know this forum will keep me busy reading all the posts instead of eating

Keep posting ladies get me skinny !!

Hey Tor! Haha I know, it does get boring sometimes as you feel your life revolves around it! I'd love to discuss my work on here but can't due to confidentiality issues! Good luck for Wednesday, keep me updated about your progress!

 

[Sophiesophs]

Yes I've started a diary...I find writing really therapeutic even if it is to myself! It's called epic journey! Xxx

 

[misswilma14]

Day 18!

Today has just been an absolute emotional roller coaster! Work is a nightmare, one of my colleagues is crazy! She also tried to tell me today that 'fad diets like CWP don't work, people lose all the weight then put it back on, they should just lose weight through healthy eating and exercise'.. This is coming from a woman who is quite a bit bigger than me, constantly on a 'diet' (but always goes and buys chocolate) but still tells people she is a size 10! When she's very clearly not. Why would you even say that? Sometimes she goes out of her way to get it into the conversation as well! I know she is just insecure and trying to make herself feel better but there is no need. I'm also having some pretty big money worries and am unsure if I will be able to go back to uni for my last year because of it.. just all felt so overwhelming today. But luckily for me I have a really good support network of friends, family and boyfriend so although I'm living alone its fine. I'll get through!

On a more positive note, second weigh in and..... I lost 4lbs! Hit my personal target for the week, meaning I am now officially in the 10's! Very happy about this! And lost 5inches overall from by body, couldn't quite believe it when she told me! Wasn't really expecting a good weight loss as the last few days I have felt pretty crappy. And haven't gone to the toilet in quite a while.. I can't remember the last time I went, must have been about 4-5 days ago. So going to get some laxatives tomorrow and the fybogel to sort things out again. Also just realised this puts me in the 'normal' BMI category! Woooo

Had my planned cheat meal, and it was lovely. A little cake from a woman in work, then an indian. I couldn't eat the whole portion, not even nearly all of it.. but then went back for seconds later! Oops! Shouldn't have done that but I don't feel guilty. Had an easter egg as well. I must say, I did enjoy the meal but if I really think about it, I think I enjoyed the idea of the treat meal more than the actual meal itself. I think I could have got a nice, single portion of something I like (e.g. lasagne ready meal) and a single piece of cake for desert and that would have satisfied me. It wouldn't have left me feeling sick like I am now. So I don't feel guilty about the night, but have learnt a valuable lesson: it's not the huge quantities of food I want on a cheat meal, its the quality of the food and flavours I enjoy!

Still feeling really motivated and looking forward to getting back into a normal routine tomorrow hope everyone has had a really great day

 

[Sophiesophs]

4lbs and 5in is amazing ! And well done for not self sabotaging when you've been having such a crappy week! A little treat is fine and like you say you've learnt a valuable life lesson......geez there are always people who have an opinion on this diet, my mil is one of them! But kinda funny when they preach and yet are overweight themselves....it's a pinch of salt moment, don't listen to them, they're in denial over their own weight and are probably jealous of other people's success!

 

[misswilma14]

4lbs and 5in is amazing ! And well done for not self sabotaging when you've been having such a crappy week! A little treat is fine and like you say you've learnt a valuable life lesson......geez there are always people who have an opinion on this diet, my mil is one of them! But kinda funny when they preach and yet are overweight themselves....it's a pinch of salt moment, don't listen to them, they're in denial over their own weight and are probably jealous of other people's success!

Looking back it wasn't a 'little' treat haha.. suppose I'll have to get used to the fact that my nice, slimmer body can't handle the sh*t I used to put it through! And your very right about my colleague, I said my piece about the fact that I know a lot of people do diets like this and end up putting the weight back on but that's because they get to goal and think they can go back to their old eating habits.. And I am very aware that can't happen! I'm fully planning on moving through the steps when I get near to goal, spending about a month on each step to really get my head round it. I know for the rest of my life I will be on the Cambridge plan, because it works for me and just makes sense. I know that all my life I will have a weekly 'cheat' meal and enjoy it. And I know I will have a few days before and after to compensate, which I'm fine with. It's just all about working it into your life in a sustainable way. If anyone's interested, and like me thinks that maintenance will be the biggest hurdle, you should really read this diary on another website: http://www.weightplanners.com/forum_posts.asp?TID=54184 this girl is amazing! She explains her journey through maintenance in a really nice, readable way and in a lot of detail. I'm definitely going to follow in her footsteps!

Feeling pretty bad about my cheat meal last night - not guilty, I mean physically bad. Really bloated, dehydrated, stomach cramps. I have also been quite constipated over the last week and its feeling worst today (I expected the indian to..ahem.. promote bowl moves!) so going to get some lactulose and fybogel. My CC said to use the lactulose first, make sure I'm all cleared out, then use the fybogel afterwards daily.. Apparently if you use it before you're 'all clear' it can have some nasty, painful effects! Sorry if tmi haha.

On nights this weekend again (I get the worst luck with shifts!) so attempting to plan when to get my shakes in to give me optimal energy/fullness. I'm still really full this morning from last night's extravaganza, so think I'll leave my first shake until later in the day. Hoping that it won't take me long to get back into ketosis.. because it's only been one meal, hopefully my glycogen stores (the carb stores..get me with my scientific knowledge! ) aren't that full so maybe take one or two days to get back into it. Really want to invest in some of them ketosis sticks I've heard about on here to see how long it takes me! From experience, after my cheat meal last week, it took me about 2 days to get back into it. The trusty diet breath will tell me haha!

Not sure what to do today, clouds up here look miserable. Maybe have a duvet day and catch up on some bad TV. Or start watching game of thrones.. Everyone at Uni is going on about it but I haven't really had a chance to get into it. Will use the 'I'm getting into ketosis so will have no energy excuse' hehe! Even the two hard days of ketosis have their perks!

 

[misswilma14]

Also, just read through my record card and realised I have lost a total of 7 inches not 5! 2 inches off waist, 2 off hips (woohoo! thats the danger area), 1.5 off chest, and 1.5 off thighs! Also realised that my right arm is bigger than my left arm, and my right thigh is bigger than my left thigh! Must remember to take all future photos from the left side hehe!

 

[misswilma14]

Day 19 (yesterday)

Okay so yesterday wasn't 100%. I woke feeling really bloated and grim from my extravaganza the previous night, and was just trying to drink loads and loads of water to counteract it. Was up 1.5lbs on the scales, so thats making me determined to lose that within the next few days. But there was a tiny piece of easter egg I hadn't eaten on the side.. and I ate it! Don't know what I was thinking, as that set my ketosis back by about 12 hours. And half a day is precious this week if I'm to lose the excess 1.5lb plus more in only 6 days (having my WI a day early)!!!!! And I must admit, thoughts of 'oh well I have ruined it now may as well have a big pastry filled breakfast' popped into my head, but I persuaded myself otherwise. The thought of only losing 1lb, sts or gaining next week is frightening me! So other than that I've been fine. On nights so that's really wearing me out - I'm training to be a nurse so 12.5 hour shifts. But I got through Just going to drink as much water as I can and hope this weight magically falls off like it's supposed to Hope everyone has a great day, I'm off to sleep

 

[misswilma14]

Day 20 (yesterday)


Had a 100% day! Really enjoyed my warm chocolate shake when I got in from my night shift, then had a leek and potato soup for dinner. Strawberry shake during my break in work.. Was having a mad busy night in work and it really kept me going! This morning can feel the ketosis breath starting - never thought I'd be so happy about having bad breath haha! Have bought some ketostix so hoping they arrive soon, will be good to know how long exactly it takes me to get into ketosis. Anyway, I'll update later once I'm more alive

 

[Sophiesophs]

Yay Miss Wilma! I must say I do admire you for sticking to it through your training! I only did two years of my nurses training (about 8 years ago now) and I found it so mentally and physically exhausting at times that I'm not sure how I'd of managed if I'd only been on 600 calories! That's blimin amazing! I hate my ketosis breath , I'm covering my mouth in bed when talking to hubby incase he gets a sniff! Horrifying!

 

[misswilma14]

Yay Miss Wilma! I must say I do admire you for sticking to it through your training! I only did two years of my nurses training (about 8 years ago now) and I found it so mentally and physically exhausting at times that I'm not sure how I'd of managed if I'd only been on 600 calories! That's blimin amazing! I hate my ketosis breath , I'm covering my mouth in bed when talking to hubby incase he gets a sniff! Horrifying!

It is mentally and physically exhausting, plus I do temping admin work on my day off! Crazy but I need the extra money to keep me afloat. Will be all worth it when I qualify though! Haha ketosis breath is so gross, glad my OH lives hundreds of miles away! Can't wait until I get to see him in a few weeks time - hoping he will notice the weight loss but he isn't the brightest button haha.

 

[misswilma14]

Day 21.. 3 weeks!

I know people say it goes really quickly.. but I don't agree, I feel like I have been on Cambridge forever! Couldn't imagine not being on it at the minute. Hopefully that's just me getting used to it, walk in the park mindset eh . Today's been fine, not done much as it's my day off and these are rare for me! Spend most of the day tidying my flat and watching rubbish TV: I must admit it, I am a sucker for all shows food-related at the minute! Come dine with me, dinner date, bests british menu.. Living my food dreams through others haha. I still feel a little bloated but not more than usual, and am looking forward to jumping on the scales tomorrow to see if last week's indian weight is gone. I bloody hope so! I'll be gutted if the 2lbs isn't gone. As if I had it on Thursday and am still paying for it on Sunday. Just teaches me not to be a pig eh. Not looking forward to tomorrow in work, it's my mentors birthday and she is definitely bringing cakes in! I know it's awful but I hate saying no, as we are a close knit team and I feel like it's rude - especially as she's gone to the trouble of home baking them. But on the other hand, I know it's my WI a day early this week (to accommodate an end-of-the-year meal with some other students.. so excited!) so I really can't afford the slightest slip up. I think I'll just take a cake and sneakily put it in my bag. Then I can enjoy it on Wednesday after WI maybe? I must admit I am proud of myself for giving up free food in work though. My hospital does free/discounted lunch time meals for students so I was saving a lot of money by having my main meal at work.. But then again was spending about £30 a week on binge eating chocolate and more chocolate! I'm just really glad I am doing this and properly making a difference to my life. Can't wait to go on holiday feeling good about myself!

Anyway this has been a rambling post - hope everyone has had a good, 100% day and has a lovely week ahead

 

[misswilma14]

Day 22 ..

Oh no. Horrible day. Basically, there was cake in work. Chocolate cake. Belgium chocolate cake. And carrot cake. And victoria sponge cake. Why do the gods tourture me like this? I went completely off the rails and had a piece of each. Then, to make matters worst, I had the all-or-nothing, i've-already-ruined-it-so-f***-it mentality.. so went to the shops and bought a mass of chocolaty carby no-nos. And I must admit - the cake in work was lovely. Even nicer as I hadn't had anything sweet and rich like that in 3 weeks. But the rest of the food I ate wasn't even that nice! By the end of it I was just eating for the sake of eating. Just really greedy. And now I feel immensely guilty and horribly fat - I even feel physically sick. And it's my WI on Wednesday and I really don't want to go. I know if I put on weight I will be absolutely gutted.

I know the reasons behind it. The all-or-nothing mentality, and the fact that I am very bored with my life at the minute and lonely. I live with other students but don't get along with them really. And what they say about loneliness is true - 'Being lonely does not come from surrounded by noone, being lonely comes from being surrounded by the wrong people'. Which is very very true. I'm such an emotional eater but have always denied it. But need to realise that food does not make me feel better.. not even in the short term! It's just a coping strategy and a maladaptive one at that. I need a good strategy for coping with boredom and loneliness, but just can't think of one I would enjoy. The thought of going out for a walk on my own seriously depresses me, my gym membership has ended and there is only a certain amount of times you can ring your friends without becoming a pest.

I know that I'll be back on the diet tomorrow, but also on the other hand think, 'why should I bother, I'm going for a big meal on Wednesday so won't even get back into ketosis before then'. I know thats the wrong attitude to have, but whilst I'm quite low I think it will be harder to resist the leftover cake in the office. Plus doesn't help that I'm in the office on my own, so nobody would know if I have any. Such a fat persons way of thinking! I will be letting myself down majorly though, so going to try my best not to.

I am going on holiday in less than a month ffs! I should be so motivated to push further on with this diet but just somehow am not. Feel fat, bloated and like a failure. Really low in mood, haven't felt like this in months. Eurgh!

Sorry for this post if anyone is reading, I just need to get all my feelings out so I'm able to look at them properly. I know I'm guaranteed to lose at least half a stone before I go on holiday, I just need to put the effort in.

 

[Sophiesophs]

Awwww honey everyone goes through this. Your mentality is the same as mine, I've always been the one to say 'sod it, I've blown it now, may as well enjoy myself' . Youve got two options.....You say you're going for a meal on Wednesday eve.....why not now start a fresh on Thursday morning and just write the next few days off. You're body is going to wonder what's going on if you drop to 600kcal today and then eat a largish meal wed. I think sometimes you need a few days off this diet to have a taster of food ( whether it be the right food or 'wrong' food) and to re evaluate why you're doing it.... I think the odd slip up here and there can be a sign of that need OR you dust yourself off and climb back on the wagon. Either way forgive yourself and don't carry any guilt with you...I'm sure that adds a pound or two on! And don't worry about your weigh in, our consultants have seen it time and time again.... And yes loneliness can be so hard. I ate for England when I was a single parent....food was definitely my friend...... :cry:

 

[misswilma14]

Soph - its silly really isn't it! Why can't we just think, oh yes I'll have this nice thing and then leave the rest. Why do we feel the need to binge, even though its totally irrational and makes us feel worst in the long run? I'm going to do some research on this and really look into it, and try and find a way to break out of this mentality.

Anyway, Day 23. (even though I'm having a blip, am still going to continue with these days rather than day 1, as it represents my real journey.. not just a lot of 'day 1's'!)

I had another bad day as I knew I was 'taking a few days off'. Ate lots of chocolate, cake, cereal and a Chinese. I do feel guilty because I didn't need all that food, I just ate it because I could. But tomorrow going try not to eat very much during the day, then go out for my meal at night. Thursday morning I will be back on it without ANY distractions! As of Thursday I will have 24 days to lose as much weight as possible! And am actually looking forward to it already. Plus, during that time I will be moving home for the summer, and as my mum is on the diet I know I will be able to stick to it easier. As long as she doesn't tempt me! We always associate each other with food, for example we will go out for dinner when we see each other, or have a takeaway, or have a night in with lots of sweets etc. I don't really know why, but I have been brought up that chocolate/sweets/generally unhealthy food is a 'treat', and she knew that made me happy as a (fat) child. She didn't do it on purpose, but as a single parent I think she just wanted to make sure she could give me as much as she could to make me happy. And that was, and consequently always has been, food. But I have spoken to her about this as we know this is a problem, and are going to try hard to do other things instead

However, am looking forward to tomorrow and very much looking forward to getting back on Cambridge properly on Thursday. I want to look good for my holiday, so going to make the effort.. 24 days is not a long time, and will hopefully fly by

 

[misswilma14]

So day 24 was also a nightmare. Put on 4lbs which I really wasn't expecting actually. I thought 2lbs max. But it just goes to show how much of a false sense of security I'd led myself into. The first two weeks I had cheated on Cambridge, going out for meals and eating easter eggs, and it hadn't affected my weight loss. I just assumed another cheat wouldn't either. But looks like it has all caught up with me now, and I only have myself to blame. There is nothing I can do about it as what's done is done, but now just looking forward in a positive mind frame!

So today (Day 25) sparks the start of my 24 day challenge! I go on holiday in 24 days and am challenging myself to stick to SS 100% for 24 days! A big challenge for me as I have only managed 6 100% in a row at most before. But I don't want to feel sad on holiday because I don't look or feel nice. I want to be able to wear my bikini and feel happy! I'm really really motivated, and looking forward to moving back in with my mum next week as we will be able to motivate each other no excuses for us! 24 days is not a long time at all.. although it feels it right now!

So today was my first 100% day and it went well. Strawberry shake for breakfast, chicken and mushroom soup for lunch and then the rice pudding for tea. Didn't really rate the rice pudding - it didn't fill me up or hit the spot. So won't be getting that again, would rather just have the porridge. Felt a little hungry today, but nothin my 5 litres of water couldn't help. Also felt a bit nauseous, but that's normal for me getting back into ketosis. My ketostix came today and I'm excited to try them out.. will do when I get the funny taste in my mouth.

In other news, I decided to treat myself to a sunbed today - start working on my holiday tan now. I went on for 6 mins, thinking that would be OK.. Last year I would go on for 12 mins about 3-4 times a week! Then had a lovely tan all summer traveling, and haven't been on since. I burnt myself so badly today! Everywhere! Literally hurts any way I lie, so am currently propped up lying half sat up. What a nightmare! Will have to keep moisturised and only go on for 4 mins once I calm down!

So there we go: Day 1/24 successfully done!

 

[misswilma14]

Day 26 (yesterday) aka 2/24-day-challenge!

100% on Friday! Was a pretty easy day, spend most of the day in bed haha. I have a good excuse though - I'm on nights again this weekend so needed to try and get some sleep in the day! Again was a bit hungry but nothing too bad. No headaches or anything which is good. I had a toffee shake for breakfast, some leak and potato soup for dinner and then a chocolate mint shake on my break in work. Was lovely! Been having the choc mint shakes warm all the time but had it cold last night, tasted much nicer! Think it's because it blends better in my shaker. There was loads of temptations in work tonight - a huge cake which looked amazing, like a cherry bake well but a big cake version! Plus mini raspberry and white chocolate cupcakes, PLUS about a million biscuits. Not going to lie, the thought did pass through my mind.. 'Maybe I could just have a tiny piece, I'm not in ketosis yet anyway so doesn't really matter too much, plus nobody will see me so I don't have to tell anyone..' but talked myself out of it! Decided that 1) I wasn't even hungry, just wanted to eat for greed, and 2) I want to be in ketosis so much! I want my body to be burning my fat resources, not some cake! So when I'm on holiday, I could have some cake if I want. But if I'm feeling as good about Cambridge as I am now, I won't even want it! Thoroughly enjoyed my hot chocolate shake when I got in, smug as a bug in a rug and very proud of myself

I have decided that my mini-goal is to be under 10st 7lbs for my holiday! Which is 10lbs in 24 days.. ambitious but I'm doing well, so hopefully will give me something to strive for! Would absolutely loveeeeee to lose 6lbs this week as that would put me at losing 1 stone in 1 month, but somehow I think thats took enthusiastic, even after the amazing week I am going to have. Not weighing myself at home until Monday morning as nightshifts interfere it (eating at strange times of the day!), so will go from there

Hope everyone has a great day! Goodnight