~Yazzy's LighterLife Lite Dairy~

[lauraandy]

Hey

Only asking cus ur weight loss is brill on lite and I can't seem to get it right!!

Anyway - what Jez said is amazing!! I know it's hard when there is a feeling of uncertainty - you always feel like you are treading on egg shells and I began running around after him to almost stop him from leaving me?!?!

And by doing it I really lost touch with myself! Which fanned the flames of the fire even more. The best thing I found to do was take time to myself and think but an exercise as suggested earlier would have - 1) made the process of split/save easier and 2) ensured I didn't get a complex about myself and questioning my own feelings.

It's not easy but I guess only u will know how u feel x x x

 

[Yasmine]

Thanks Laura I guess I am just overreacting. I just really care about him, I don't want to lose this one

 

[Yasmine]

Day 14 and 15 - How many times do I have to tell you woman!?

Forgot to update yesterday, was in too much of a bad mood, didn't want to be in the same room as my mum, and since the computer's in the living room, couldn't update anything properly.

My mum is still pissing about with what I need for the week. She just won't stop getting herself involved, how many times do I have to shout at her for her to get it!? she knows that if I dont know what's in it, I wont eat it!!!!

&^*('s sake!

Yesterdays:
Breakfast:
LL Porridge with skimmed milk\

Lunch:
LL crunchie peanut bar

Dinner:
LL curry recipe except with two cans of tuna -_-'

Late:
LL chocolate shake but less water whisked in to make it really thick and syrupy.

Today:
Breakfast:
LL porridge with skimmed milk

Lunch:
LL crunchie peanut bar

Dinner:
LL curry with lentils

Late:
LL banana shake

 

[Yasmine]

Day 16 - Party time!...sorta :/

Hey guys, ok here is going to be my first ever encounter with the friend get together party scenario! will she prevail or will she fall?... I'll prevail...but I don't know if I'll be having as much a good time as I normally would.

Today is my friends birthday, so me and my mates are gonna go down clubbing. Now normally I'd be getting pissed out of my head, doesn't really take me much to get to that point, which makes my boyfriend very happy because that means he doesn't have to spend much on getting me drunk, which he and my mates love seeing lol apparently I'm hilarious.

Anyways, so I planned to have my 2 shakes and my meal before I go, that way I'll be filled up. Hopefully I won't get in trouble to taking in a bottle of water

Breakfast:
LL nut fudge bar with 300ml of skimmed milk

Lunch:
2x LL chocolate shake mixed into a mousse

Dinner:
Same as yesterday, really need to buy that LL recipe book

Wish me luck!

 

[Yasmine]

Day 17 - I've missed out on so much

Well my first night out clubbing without drinking was a fail but I did not give up or cheat as much as I wanted to.

I was ok for the first 2 hours but when everyone begins to get tipsy or drunk, and you're the only one who isn't, you feel irratated, left out and just bored.

I had a moment of reflection while I was out, about my childhood, teen life and my life now. I have wasted so much life concerned about my body. When I was in primrary school, I wouldn't rn and play like the other kids, because I ddin't want anyone to point and laugh at the fat kid running around. In secondary school, I spent nearly all my teenage years indoors and even now, I never allow myself to let loose, have fun without being terrified of someone poking fun. Everything about my weight has ruined me. And it's really depressing. My boyfriend consoled me, he told me he doesn't even know why I am on this diet. Telling me I'm perfect, my friends also think I'm mad. I mean I know I'm not as big as I used to be even when starting LL, but I just don't see what they see. I'm unhappy, both being big and not living my life with no fear. It's not fair, it really isn't.


Breakfast:
LL banana shake with skimmed milk

Lunch:
LL cranberry bar

Dinner:
Fish curry and carrot stick

Late:
LL vanilla shake

 

[Yasmine]

Day 18 and 19 - Weigh in 3

Past two days have been the same food wise, starting to get a little bored to be honest

I feel that I need to go back to eating the smaller amount of food on the list. Might try that this week. My weigh in wasn't really anything that grand as I'm on my monthly so I lost 0.4lbs. Ah well, that probably means I'm gonna have a nice fat weight loss next week .

I'm feeling a little bit more comfortable now, got a few things of my chest today in group. It was around our worries and mine was mainly around my social life as I've stated earlier. I guess I have to just put up with it all and just carry on doing what's best for me. In the end, I'll be slim and confident than ever, and I do want that more than I want that cheesecake in the fridge.....dammit...I had my eye on that cheesecake for months

Today there was no chicken or cod for me but lucky me, I founds me a can of tuna!

Breakfast:
LL vanilla shake mixed with 50ml of skimmed milk

Lunch:
LL nut fudge bar

Dinner:
150g of tuna stirfried with olive oil, carrots, red pepper, leek, spring onion and garlic. With a side of quaterd tomatoes

Late:
LL chocolate shake mixed with 250ml skimmed milk

 

[Yasmine]

Day 20

Cravings have gotten worse since being on TOTM, right now I'd be eating lots of yoghurt or some cookies. Mmmm cookies

Anyway, roll on agenda ~

Breakfast:
LL Lemon bar with 250ml skimmed milk

Lunch:
LL Vanilla shake

Snack:
Dunno if I should of but if we are allowed vegetables freely, then I don't think one carrot will hurt.

Dinner:
Fried spring onion, yellow sweet pepper, garlic and leek fried in 2tsps of olive oil. Boild with crushed tomatoes, with tuna. Then put in the oven to get all crispeh! Nummy

Late:
LL chocolate shake

 

[Yasmine]

Day 21 - Back to the gym!

Finally started going back and it wasn't that bad. I was at first getting tired really quickly, I usually do 20min of cross trainer, 15min bike and then muscle workouts.

But I could only manage 15min of cross trainer, 15min bike but i decided to compensate, I did 15min of row machine. I am sooooo tired! I'm gonna sleep so well!

Breakfast:
LL vanilla shake
250ml skimmed milk

Lunch:
LL nut fudge bar

Dinner:
LL curry with red lentils

Late:
LL banana shake

 

[Jezebella]

Well done on sticking with it and getting back to the gym Yas

J
xx

 

[Yasmine]

Day 22 - Eating too much?

Cheers Jez, I am way too determiend to give this up. I hope all is well for you.

Jeez my paranoia is sooooo cack! Really need some advice if I am eating too much. I really am not so sure because I see the food, the amount that's in, which is mostely veg, but I keep thinking that maybe I am eating too much.

Here's what I had today for example

Breakfast:
LL Chocolate shake

Lunch:
LL cranberry bar

Dinner:
215g chicken
1 red bell pepper
half an onion
1 garlic clove
150g very low fat yoghurt (Tesco light choices)
2tsp olive oil

Late:
LL chocolate shake

As a calorie counter, I am so concious about calories. I don't know how many I should be eating, my LLC said that I will be eating between 800-1000 calories. But I dunno LOL

Todays total is 962 calories....am I eating too much? guess I'll find out on monday

 

[Yasmine]

Day 23 - Depressed, very depressed...

Seems like as the weeks go on it gets harder but not from hunger, but my emotions, my insecurities and guilt. I can't help but feel so left out with my friends, they're even telling me that I look absolutely depressed and I do feel it, I really do.

I miss feeling carefree, I miss being a part of our old fun that we used to have. It seems that I will be excluded from any party, get together and all that stuff. It's not like anyone even realises that I'm there :break_diet:

Breakfast:
LL nut fudge bar with 250ml of skimmed milk

Lunch:
Nando's quarter chicken (skin removed) with a mixed salad. No dressing.

Dinner:
2x LL chocolate shake

 

[Yasmine]

Day 24

Breakfast:
LL nut fudge bar with 250ml skimmed milk

Lunch:
LL banana shake

Dinner:
LL chicken curry

Late:
LL chocolate shake

 

[SunshineCass]

I hope you're feeling better today, it'll get easier. You'll have down days. I'm sure your friends will be there for you no matter what.

I've been reading your blog and have visited your youtube channel and we have alot in common, just thought id share that random i know..

Enjoy your day

Cass xx

 

[Yasmine]

Thanks I do feel a little better, I just don't like being cast away because I'm not 'normal'. LOL and thanks it's not random, I'm glad I'm being heard on here and youtube I hope all is well for you

 

[Yasmine]

Day 25 and 26 - Week 4 weigh in

I've been a little bit stranded lately, haven't been updating daily but meh no worries. This week was a little stressful with the whole eating out at Nando's but it was all good since I made the healthiest choice and lost 3.7lbs

I love my boyfriend for the fact that he is honest with me but sometimes you can be a little too honest. He told me about that day when we went out clubbing, he forgot I was even there, because it's like I wasn't a part of it. Getting drunk and going mad etc. So I pretty much had no prescence . I know it's maybe silly to get upset over but it really did hurt. He told me that I might as well just not come out when they have a piss up or whatever. I just feel so rejected.

Breakfast:
LL porridge with 150ml skimmed milk

Lunch:
LL fruit bar with 150ml skimmed milk

Dinner:
Most likely the same as usual.

Late:
LL banana shake

 

[Yasmine]

Day 27

Breakfast:
LL porridge with 150ml skimmed milk

Lunch:
LL nut fudge bar

Dinner:
chicken stir fry

Late:
LL chocolate shake

 

[SunshineCass]

Awh yasmine, did you try to tell your boyfriend how that made you feel? Even if he is an honest person, sometimes there's a line. Especially if his comment made you feel like that.

Hope you're well.

 

[Yasmine]

Day 28

Thanks Cass, even though it hurts it is true that there isn't anything I do. If I do come to these gatherings, I'm just like that extra wheel. Maybe it's best I don't go :/

Breakfast:
LL fruit bar with 250ml skimmed milk

Lunch:
LL banana shake with 50ml skimmed milk

Dinner:
LL chicken curry

Late:
LL chocolate shake

 

[Yasmine]

Day 29 and 30

Breakfast:
LL porridge with 150ml skimmed milk

Lunch:
LL nut fudge bar

Dinner:
LL curry

Late:
LL chocolate shake

_____________________________________________________

Today I feel a lot better, I thought a lot of anxiety that my boyfriend has been feeling lately was towards me and this diet but he's actually just so tired from work, he works part time but they give him ridiculous hours and shifts and on top of that he has college, the poor boy is nakerd bless him . Ah well, it's all a learning process I guess.

I am now starting to fit into my size 14 jeans! they're tight though but before I couldn't even pull them up to my thighs!

As for my eating I don't know what it is with my head really, I know that I shouldn't be feeling hungry but I can't help but feel like wanting to eat constantly especially chocolate or bread. These are my ultimate favourite kinds of food they are so hard to resist. I haven't given in but I get so grumpy when I don't have them

Ah well, can't wait for this to be over really, I'm tired of dieting lol

Breakfast:
LL porridge and 150ml skimmed milk

Lunch:
LL nut fudge bar

Dinner:
LL curry

Late:
LL chocolate shake

 

[Yasmine]

Day 31 - so fricken hungry!!

It's so irratating, I couldn't help but feel so hungry! even when I was stuffed from all those veggies! But I guess cravings will be cravings eh? so annoying. I snacked today, on carrots, I don't think it should affect anything but I should learn to not do that.

Breakfast:
LL Porridge with 150ml skimmed milk

Mid morning:
LL banana shake with 50ml skimmed milk

Lunch:
LL vanilla shake 50ml skimmed milk

Snack:
One large carrot

Dinner:
Fried onions and mushrooms with courgette and chopped tomatoes with an omellete and a side salad of lettuce and carrots

Late:
Another damned carrot lol