Yoghurt on week 2

[Minerva]

One word of advice Andy, for a meal so soon after abstinence, I would suggest staying away from heavy laden carbs such as 'sandwich'. Obviously if you feel ready, go for it, but it may shock the system a little bit so soon. Perhaps have a Chicken Ceasar Salad (may be a bit gay in front of your ex-uni mates, so I'm sorry!!) or a fish dish with a controlled small portion of chips if you must.
Just worrying a little bit about it, because I do remember carbs being VERY heavy at first, especially bread and pasta. I did feel a little ill after eating them to be honest.

 

[Blonde Logic]

I tend to agree with Minerva - lol Andy you must feel like we are watching your every move - but we do this to everyone!

Please be careful tweaking RTM too much, as then you are not really doing RTM....its all layed out in a specific order of reintroduction for a reason, and crips, chips and bread are not added until way late in the program....just be careful, or willing to accept consequences, etc.

Have fun with your frineds! The won;t recognise you!!!

xx

 

[SerenityValley]

Thanks folks - minerva has reminded mne on msn that I'm on week 3 and can actually have steak and salad if I want, so ok, no chips, or non-veggie carbs for me

I had just about forgotten that actually there is cool stuff I can eat now! (remembered when I came home tonight to find bacon in my fridge and a fillet steak lol)

 

[Minerva]

Thanks folks - minerva has reminded mne on msn that I'm on week 3 and can actually have steak and salad if I want, so ok, no chips, or non-veggie carbs for me

I had just about forgotten that actually there is cool stuff I can eat now! (remembered when I came home tonight to find bacon in my fridge and a fillet steak lol)

Yay Andy!! I love your positive attitude, concentrating on the "I can have's" rather than "I can't have's" ! Great job! *hugs*

 

[SerenityValley]

*hugs* Thanks Minerva

 

[SerenityValley]

Not going to beat myself up, not going to defend it, but I ended up having a burger and chips.

 

[SerenityValley]

This is mostly a reminder to me - next time I have to go out like this, I should eat my pack(s) and proper dinner before I go.

And to remind myself I DID manage to turn down crisps on friday - a free packet on offer as well.

 

[SerenityValley]

Had a better day today. Met a friend for lunch, and had a greek chicken kebab (the type on a stick). It was lightly spiced, very yummy abd I ate a tiny wee bit of the green stuff.

It tasted nicer than the burger and chips, which I'll remind myself of next time.

I also ate it very slowly - and was the most enjoyable meal I've had in a couple of weeks. Something else to remind myself.

Other than that, I actually feel quite down. I feel isolated from the LL forum - I don't really feel a part of the main forum now (a bit like where I stopped going to the counselling sessiosn as I didn't feel a part of them anymore).

ETA: Oh and my chicken came with fries - so I asked for them to be supplied in a separate bowl, and my friend ate them for me

 

[Blonde Logic]

you are still allowed out there Andy. We jsut have to watch what we type in that part of the forum.

Youw ill find the RTM forum waxes and wanes with regard to activity - so sometimes I forget to look in here. If you ever post something and feel you aren't getting a reply, etc. it may be we've gotten side-tracked out there. Just cvome out there and shout OY! And tell us to look in here. :S is very good abuot looking in ont his part of the forum, but its hit or miss for me.

I felt like you - I missed all the banter and as few peek in on the RTM thread, we have to go invade their space!!

MWA HA HA HA HA!!!

Well done btw - its all trial and error, and is interesting isn;t it to find the healthier choices are every bit as tasty as the naughty ones. Sometimes, and often times even better. So good on ya!

AND - you ate green stuff!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

x

 

[SerenityValley]

Thanks BL - I don't really know why I feel down. I do feel isolated as it feels different now, and yes, not hearing from anyone - even a telling off for what I ate, did have my questioning myself. I'm not as secure as I'd like to be.

I know I let myself down by taking the choice I did - though a couple of good things did come out of it (one was working out a strategy to ensure it doesn't happen again, and tthe other being working out that the healthy choice was just as yummy, moreso even).

I think also this feeling i ssomething that hits me from time to time and it's happening less often - the longer periods of time between feeling down probably make it fele worse than when it was a constant feeling.

 

[Blonde Logic]

I know I let myself down by taking the choice I did - though a couple of good things did come out of it (one was working out a strategy to ensure it doesn't happen again, and tthe other being working out that the healthy choice was just as yummy, moreso even).

.

It is all a learning curve mate. And no matter what we have - there is always something worse we could have had instead or in addition too - so I for one would never tell you off! Then someone could tell me off sometimes!! Besides, it got you thinking about strategies - so how cool is that!!!

Cheer up mate - we will always be "feeling" kinds of people. I believe that, because what we have been through in life. As I have said before and will always say - no one knows what a fat person has been through, except another fat person. We're all in this together.

You are doing greatl Don't every doubt yourself up, and don't you beat yourself up either!

XX

 

[SerenityValley]

Thanks folks - I do feel a but better today.

I guess "telling me off" is a poor choice of words - I think my mind took on that position it often does - that because no one had replied, they were so disappointed in me, that they were not even going to say anything. I've had this for many years - it's a huge level of insecurity that I could type for hours about and won't. The irony is that I know it's not the case - but try telling that to my inner "Arnold Rimmer" (hopes I'm not the only red dwarf fan)

 

[SerenityValley]

That is exactly it - and I'm not 100% sur where it came from in my place - other than two very damaging relationships with women. Neither of which I can really go into here (I've only told 3 or 4 people about them). I think though that it only became bad this time last year.

 

[Minerva]

:hug99:
Andy... know that I'm always reading... and when I'm around I will have a chat on msn... and I do care. The reason I didn't reply about the burger etc (lol) was because while I was a little bit disappointed - I was also remembering that you are your own person and can make your own decisions. I was also waiting for further thought processes to develop - which they did.
You worked through the issues and saw that your original burger/chips decision was nowhere near as satisfying as you thought it would be. In fact you admitted that you enjoyed a healthier option far more. That made me smile, and I know you're ok on your own. It does of course help to have some input - but at this stage sometimes it is crucial to start making those decisions by yourself; and you are. I'm proud.

As for the other point of almost having had enough of foodpacks; feeling like you don't want to have them anymore, don't need them anymore... Remember that it won't be long until you can eat more properly and start making your own decisions 100%. That day will come. The residual foodpacks for the next few weeks are there to reaffirm the knowledge you are picking up over these days.
In comparison to food you're having: yes they're not very pleasant, and I know when I was doing RTM I was very much tempted to 'substitute' an extra piece of fruit, or extra piece of *something* for a foodpack in that day.... I honestly don't suggest you do that... once that starts - the "bargaining" mindset never stops. It can lead into unhealthy things, soon enough it would be 'if I don't eat anything all day - I can have that chocolate muffin later' ... and then .. much later in the year... the chocolate muffin is a stable diet addition and more creeps into the dietary regime...

I don't know, maybe I'm being too negative, but that's what I've seen my boyfriend do. He finished RTM in October last year, and I must say, he was 100% focused all the way through, Christmas wasn't bad on him... but he's lost the LL thinking and I have seen the 'bargaining' mindset at work ... needless to say he's gained a little which he doesn't see. But he's an adult and makes his own decisions. I just gently nudge him away from the never ending cake towards the portion controlled chocolate pieces! Thank god he loves Cadbury's dairy milk.

 

[Sean(JSF)]

Hey Andy - Just for you

 

[SerenityValley]

haha thanks Sean! Especially the bottom one with Mr Flibble!

 

[slendablenda]

Hi Andy

Don't forget it has been Easter and school holidays. A lot of people on here are Mums with kids and don't have much time at the moment. Pete has had a tough time lately and is away in Brighton, H has gone very quiet, Anna is God knows where, PB - have you gone away yet?
BL , still here, but working evenings and in the throes of changing jobs.
Alot of the newer LL gang are in their starter month forums, they're always pleased to receive visits from people who have got to or near goal. Remember how it was for us?
It will liven up again I'm sure and as you said, we all expereince ups and downs.
In the winter time we probably spend more time sitting at the computer. I know I'm much busier now the sun is shining more, getting my garden ready for summer.
Chin (only one now!) up Andy. You have done so well. Starting RTM brings up all the old insecurities doesn't it? Certainly did for me. I thnk we kknew it was never going to be easy.Every one said abstinence was the easy part...........

 

[Blonde Logic]

Well said SB. I feel out of the loop with everyone - I look in, but can't seem to organise time to reply properly to most posts - some days i really feel as if I have developed ADD - but then I stop and realise i am just juggling too much in my head.

Hopefully life should be calming down a bit now. Phew.

Good luck Tusday Andy in case I don;t get on any other threads of yours!!

xx