Alex's Diary - No big goals, just taking one day at a time!
- Thread starter Alex_1978
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Alex_1978
Gold Member
I'm back! 
It was soooo nice - the hotel was the Ritz-Carlton The Ritz-Carlton Golf and Spa Resort, Rose Hall, Jamaica which was very posh, with lovely staff. We had a ground floor room that looked out onto the lawn, followed by the beach and the sea...very tranquil and picturesque.
We didn't do much while we were there in terms of trips, but we made the most of the sunshine and spent the majority of our time either by the pool, at the bar, or eating! The breakfasts were unbelievable - everything you can imagine from fresh fruit, through to bagels, pastries, cooked meats, eggs, cold meats, smoked salmon - you name it, it was there
And guess what? I didn't need the seatbelt extension this time!! I was seated in premium economy both ways (not sure if the economy seatbelts are any shorter) and I was fine, albeit a bit snug on the way back - think the newer aircraft have shorter seatbelts as I had 3-4 inches spare on the way out, and I didn't put on THAT much weight
Which brings me onto the dreaded issue of weight - having eaten and drank everything in sight, I convinced myself that I would be 7-9lbs heavier, so I was pleasantly surprised when it was only 3.5lbs.
I'm not recording that on my ticker though, because I missed my official weigh in - and I'm away again this weekend, so I'd rather face the music when it's all over!
Anyway, hope you're all well. I'll post some piccies later if I get chance.
Missed you all x
It was soooo nice - the hotel was the Ritz-Carlton The Ritz-Carlton Golf and Spa Resort, Rose Hall, Jamaica which was very posh, with lovely staff. We had a ground floor room that looked out onto the lawn, followed by the beach and the sea...very tranquil and picturesque.
We didn't do much while we were there in terms of trips, but we made the most of the sunshine and spent the majority of our time either by the pool, at the bar, or eating! The breakfasts were unbelievable - everything you can imagine from fresh fruit, through to bagels, pastries, cooked meats, eggs, cold meats, smoked salmon - you name it, it was there
And guess what? I didn't need the seatbelt extension this time!! I was seated in premium economy both ways (not sure if the economy seatbelts are any shorter) and I was fine, albeit a bit snug on the way back - think the newer aircraft have shorter seatbelts as I had 3-4 inches spare on the way out, and I didn't put on THAT much weight
Which brings me onto the dreaded issue of weight - having eaten and drank everything in sight, I convinced myself that I would be 7-9lbs heavier, so I was pleasantly surprised when it was only 3.5lbs.
I'm not recording that on my ticker though, because I missed my official weigh in - and I'm away again this weekend, so I'd rather face the music when it's all over!
Anyway, hope you're all well. I'll post some piccies later if I get chance.
Missed you all x
pink_kelly
Full Member
Hiya Alex,
I've been away myself and read today about you having the opportunity to go to Jamaica! You lucky bugger!
xxxx
I've been away myself and read today about you having the opportunity to go to Jamaica! You lucky bugger!
xxxx
KittyBling
Gold Member
Not bad going, Alex, well done and good luck for next week,
KB x
KB x
purple_kathryn
Mostly harmless
Glad you had a great time! (still hate you though )
)
KittyBling
Gold Member
Well??
KB x
KB x
Alex_1978
Gold Member
Well....it's not good 4lbs on this week...
It's about what I expected to be honest, but it doesn't make it any easier. I've also just made things even harder for myself by having fish and chips for lunch, followed by almost a whole stick of Blackpool rock.
Don't know what's wrong with me at the moment, but I can't seem to get a grip. Jamaica started the ball rolling, but last weekend was a complete pig out too, and I have stuff coming up over the next few weekends, so I really don't know when I'm going to be able to get back on track.
Normally, I would be really motivated to stay focussed beween these social events, but at the moment I really can't be bothered. It's been so long since I made any real progress, and I just seem to have lost momentum and motivation.
Yesterday, I got so frustrated that I was nearly in tears...I just feel like giving up, but I know that if I do that, I'll put all the weight back on, and I can't let myself do that. So the only other option is to stick at it, and keep trying, but at the moment I just don't have the motivation to keep planning, keep counting, keep saying no, keep fighting the hunger every day...
Sorry everyone, not the best update really, and it seems to come at a time when we have lots of people doing really well on here! I just wish I shared your enthusiasm and motivation at the moment.
Bye for now
x
4lbs on this week...It's about what I expected to be honest, but it doesn't make it any easier. I've also just made things even harder for myself by having fish and chips for lunch, followed by almost a whole stick of Blackpool rock.
Don't know what's wrong with me at the moment, but I can't seem to get a grip. Jamaica started the ball rolling, but last weekend was a complete pig out too, and I have stuff coming up over the next few weekends, so I really don't know when I'm going to be able to get back on track.
Normally, I would be really motivated to stay focussed beween these social events, but at the moment I really can't be bothered. It's been so long since I made any real progress, and I just seem to have lost momentum and motivation.
Yesterday, I got so frustrated that I was nearly in tears...I just feel like giving up, but I know that if I do that, I'll put all the weight back on, and I can't let myself do that. So the only other option is to stick at it, and keep trying, but at the moment I just don't have the motivation to keep planning, keep counting, keep saying no, keep fighting the hunger every day...
Sorry everyone, not the best update really, and it seems to come at a time when we have lots of people doing really well on here! I just wish I shared your enthusiasm and motivation at the moment.
Bye for now
x
KittyBling
Gold Member
You and me both, Alex, I think we have just reached a place that is very hard to move on from. I know exactly how you feel, I could have written all that myself. Chin up, we CAN do this and we WILL do it, we are just taking the very long way round! I haven't got my act together all week and I haven't got Jamaica to blame either. We are going to have to sit down and look at how far we've come, remember how much better we feel than we used to and remind ourselves that if we relax too much now all that hard work will be undone and we'll be back to square one, or worse! I for one don't want that but at the moment I'm really struggling to pick it up again. Got to be done though, lets do it together!
KB x
KB x
KittyBling
Gold Member
Just sent you another PM but the computer freaked out in the middle of it and now I don't know if I didn't send it at all or if I sent it about 3 times! Let me know... and have a GREAT day
KB x
KB x
Alex_1978
Gold Member
Thank you :heartpump: and I'm sorry KB, but I didn't get your PM
I really hope I really can do it this time - this is the worst serious wobble I've had for a while and it's scaring the hell out of me.
Take yesterday evening for example - I'd aleady had fish and chips with bread and butter at work (which I'd normally say no to) but instead of just drawing a line under it, I spent the rest of the day fantasising about what else I could shove into my fat mouth...and then trying to keep the tenuous grip I've got on this diet by talking myself out of it...
It seemed like a 'waste' in my twisted mind to have healthy food when I'd already blown it, so I was dreaming of having bacon butties, or toast with butter, or pizza....anything fatty and calorific...in fact I thought about it all the way home, and then stood at the kitchen cupboards for ages trying to decide what I actually wanted to eat to make the best of this 'off plan' day...
What eventually saved me wasn't willpower really, it was the lack of food in the house - no bacon, sausages, and no butter to even make toast. I'd got it into my head that I wanted to pig out, so when I couldn't find anything unhealthy to eat, I decided to have nothing at all (except for a Curly Wurly before bed!)
So today, I'm feeling kind of triumphant that I didn't cave in, but still scared that I feel on the edge of blowing the whole thing at the moment...
I guess I just have to ride the storm, and remember why I'm doing this.
xx
I really hope I really can do it this time - this is the worst serious wobble I've had for a while and it's scaring the hell out of me.
Take yesterday evening for example - I'd aleady had fish and chips with bread and butter at work (which I'd normally say no to) but instead of just drawing a line under it, I spent the rest of the day fantasising about what else I could shove into my fat mouth...and then trying to keep the tenuous grip I've got on this diet by talking myself out of it...
It seemed like a 'waste' in my twisted mind to have healthy food when I'd already blown it, so I was dreaming of having bacon butties, or toast with butter, or pizza....anything fatty and calorific...in fact I thought about it all the way home, and then stood at the kitchen cupboards for ages trying to decide what I actually wanted to eat to make the best of this 'off plan' day...
What eventually saved me wasn't willpower really, it was the lack of food in the house - no bacon, sausages, and no butter to even make toast. I'd got it into my head that I wanted to pig out, so when I couldn't find anything unhealthy to eat, I decided to have nothing at all (except for a Curly Wurly before bed!)
So today, I'm feeling kind of triumphant that I didn't cave in, but still scared that I feel on the edge of blowing the whole thing at the moment...
I guess I just have to ride the storm, and remember why I'm doing this.
xx
pink_kelly
Full Member
Hi Alex,
I've seen you post so many motivational messages around these boards to myself and others, you always say about this weight loss being a journey and one with ups and downs. Don't let these past few weeks dishearten you - you've come so far.
I remember when I joined here I read ALL of your diary and thought how inspiring it was, but also I loved the fact that you had all of life barriers and challenges facing you, and yes, as well all have we sometimes give in to the temptation but you've always got back on the horse and tried.
You're an inspiration!
Chin up honey xxxxxx
I've seen you post so many motivational messages around these boards to myself and others, you always say about this weight loss being a journey and one with ups and downs. Don't let these past few weeks dishearten you - you've come so far.
I remember when I joined here I read ALL of your diary and thought how inspiring it was, but also I loved the fact that you had all of life barriers and challenges facing you, and yes, as well all have we sometimes give in to the temptation but you've always got back on the horse and tried.
You're an inspiration!
Chin up honey xxxxxx
Kes
Gold Member
Thank you :heartpump: and I'm sorry KB, but I didn't get your PM
I really hope I really can do it this time - this is the worst serious wobble I've had for a while and it's scaring the hell out of me.
Take yesterday evening for example - I'd aleady had fish and chips with bread and butter at work (which I'd normally say no to) but instead of just drawing a line under it, I spent the rest of the day fantasising about what else I could shove into my fat mouth...and then trying to keep the tenuous grip I've got on this diet by talking myself out of it...
It seemed like a 'waste' in my twisted mind to have healthy food when I'd already blown it, so I was dreaming of having bacon butties, or toast with butter, or pizza....anything fatty and calorific...in fact I thought about it all the way home, and then stood at the kitchen cupboards for ages trying to decide what I actually wanted to eat to make the best of this 'off plan' day...
What eventually saved me wasn't willpower really, it was the lack of food in the house - no bacon, sausages, and no butter to even make toast. I'd got it into my head that I wanted to pig out, so when I couldn't find anything unhealthy to eat, I decided to have nothing at all (except for a Curly Wurly before bed!)
So today, I'm feeling kind of triumphant that I didn't cave in, but still scared that I feel on the edge of blowing the whole thing at the moment...
I guess I just have to ride the storm, and remember why I'm doing this.
xx
i know what you mean!! today was one of those days for me... why not just eat. ive already started so why not finish the day off like it started...
why do we do it to ourselves????
Alex_1978
Gold Member
Thank you so much for this lovely message...it made me a bit emotional actually! I must admit, I don't feel very inspirational at the moment, but I hope this is just a little blip and that I'll be able to pull it back together soon.
The way I see it, is that I don't have any other option...if I give up now, I won't just maintain, I'll put all the weight back on again, and I really can't do that to myself again.
xx
I wish I knew Kes....self sabbotage is my biggest problem, and I have no idea why we do it. If I could sort that out, I'd be well on my way to goal!
Aww thanks Kae...and thanks for popping in on my diary - I know you're having a tough time at the moment, and my thoughts are with you and your family xx
KittyBling
Gold Member
^ what she said. And she has the photos to prove it.
KB x
KB x
KittyBling
Gold Member
Hellooooooo??? Where are you? Hope you're having a good week,
KB xx
KB xx
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