Amiguettes are back and better than ever :)
- Thread starter catdog
- Start date
catdog
Amiguette
im with you all the way on that cheryl, for the longest time i just sat at home eating, i hid away, too afraid of what i felt people were saying about me, maybe they were and maybe they werent, i realised this past year its not them that i cared about its me and what i think about me. A counsellor asked me has anyone ever told you you are repulsive, a beast etc all these things i think theyare and i was like no (well not to my face) its me whos constantly putting myself down or making the joke about my weight or my looks to get in there first. i know ive got alot of self esteem issues that aren tgoing to be fixed just because im slim, all i want is to wake up and be happy and to be like hell yeah this is me and i love it.
Okay well i told you bout what hapened that night before when i was in a bad place and had a fight with mark, i went out on me own for walk of course he came looking for me cos he was worried ide do sumthin silly, but hadnt found me yet but anyway i just hated myself that night and walked towards home to go back, these lads on bikes rode past and one of them starting singing big girls you are beautiful at me oh god i was so mortified, i went home fell on floor and sobbed for hours, i hated myself for letting me get that way so that some little loser prick could make me feel so bad, i promised from thenon to get out of mess ide made myself into
catdog
Amiguette
Cheryl hun theres no pressure from us to put your weight up and you know we always here for you, i wont be going MIA again that i can promise, this thread is full of friends and somewhere to come where noone will judge you, and the day you reach place you can put your stats up we'll all be here cheering you on chick xx
Emma1904
Working on it
Definitely no pressure at all! Cheryl when I started CD last year my bmi was 52 so I've been in that boat and am not far of it now!
Fearless take that experience and use it to make you stronger... just remember...'big girls are beautiful' (they just have to realise it on the inside!) xxxx
Fearless take that experience and use it to make you stronger... just remember...'big girls are beautiful' (they just have to realise it on the inside!) xxxx
cherylxx
Silver Member
ive had a few horror moments courtesy of complete strangers.
A few years ago i was sat in the doctors office in the summer and he had the window open when some lad suddenly stuck his head in the window (thankfully i was just sat on the chair, wasnt semi clothed or anything) and then he turned to people outside and shouted out ' omg , come and look at the beef in here' The doctor slammed the window shut and apologized to me but the damage was done. i didnt step out of my house for weeks after that. i was so ashamed.
the other time i went to alton towers with hubby , kids and my sister clare. we were queueing to go on nemesis and were almost at the ride itself when clare suddenly needed the toilet. now i wasnt that bothered about going on it so i said i would go with her back through the queue to the toilets. we were politely backing out through the queue again when a man shouted out ' hey look. she must have been too fat to fit in the seat' Now i know some people werent impressed with his comment but some laughed and at that point in time all i could hear was the laughter. i was so embarrassed. I have to confess i havent been to a funfair since then.
A few years ago i was sat in the doctors office in the summer and he had the window open when some lad suddenly stuck his head in the window (thankfully i was just sat on the chair, wasnt semi clothed or anything) and then he turned to people outside and shouted out ' omg , come and look at the beef in here' The doctor slammed the window shut and apologized to me but the damage was done. i didnt step out of my house for weeks after that. i was so ashamed.
the other time i went to alton towers with hubby , kids and my sister clare. we were queueing to go on nemesis and were almost at the ride itself when clare suddenly needed the toilet. now i wasnt that bothered about going on it so i said i would go with her back through the queue to the toilets. we were politely backing out through the queue again when a man shouted out ' hey look. she must have been too fat to fit in the seat' Now i know some people werent impressed with his comment but some laughed and at that point in time all i could hear was the laughter. i was so embarrassed. I have to confess i havent been to a funfair since then.
Emma1904
Working on it
I got called a whale once... hardly accurate... I'm not that big! lol, nor can I swim!
People tend to use it as the first thing to insult you with as well, it's easy to pick at which is why they are clearly not that intelligent as their little brains can't stretch to something more imaginative! x
People tend to use it as the first thing to insult you with as well, it's easy to pick at which is why they are clearly not that intelligent as their little brains can't stretch to something more imaginative! x
cherylxx
Silver Member
sorry if i seem to be on a real downer girls.
in fact, as painful as these memories and these feelings of myself are..... I am determined to finally put them to good use. to use them to strengthen my willpower when i feel weak, to fill up my determination when it falters, to help me win when i can sense failure.
in fact, as painful as these memories and these feelings of myself are..... I am determined to finally put them to good use. to use them to strengthen my willpower when i feel weak, to fill up my determination when it falters, to help me win when i can sense failure.
catdog
Amiguette
wish i could give you big hug cheryl! ive got this issue with my um bowels i cant go natural to the toilet, not since i was 15/16 so take laxatives every night but they dont always work and my belly just gets bigger and bigger, so ide lost a bit weight and was feeling okay ish so went to the funfair well me belly i was so bloated-it gets realy bad i look severely pregnant! i was in agony tis day and i had panick attack all the way upto this ride, the one that goes up and down, my head hadnt caught up that ide lost weight so still felt huge anyway but logically knew ide fit but i sat down and could barely get the belt thing shut, the bloke came and pushed the bar things down and my god i could have cried in pain inside, if i wasnt breathing in i wouldnt have fit iwas devastated for longtime after that, insted of thinking yay go me ide lost weight and it was just me bowel probs and thought positive i never left house forweeks and just sthome eting andput weight back on- im mental! lol i know its not funny but if didnt laugh ide cry.
cherylxx
Silver Member
sounds like we are all at that place we need to be to make this change. I want a life dammit. im tired of existing. i want to go out and be proud. i dont want to stand out as more beautiful than the rest.... i just dont want to stand out as the worst either.
Lets do this ladies. lets do it once and for all !!!!
Lets do this ladies. lets do it once and for all !!!!
catdog
Amiguette
it made me laugh when someone asked once if swimmings so good for you why are whales so fat lol. i dont get why people feel its their right to point out your fat, they obv very unhappy with their own lives and just like to deflect the attention away from them at the end of the day the thing i get most upset about is if i let people get to me with things they say i mean ive obv had comments off people i dont know in past but nowt like what i think about meself can be as bad but i know im a good person and ide never be as nasty as what those people can be and yeah dont particularly lik the look of meself in mirror but i can hold my head up high with the type of person i am and thats something they cant do.
Emma1904
Working on it
I want to do it and I can do it! bugger it... I'm going to have two packs and dinner tomorrow... why wait until sunday!? Just financially in a bit of a tie and just can't throw food away as can't justify buying and not using!
I'm sitting here watching Cats and Dogs with my boy who is refusing to go to sleep and I fancy a cuppa and some biscuits... I say biscuits because I won't just have one or even two if i start! but I just can't be bothered to get up and get them! maybe my laziness will help me on the route to weight loss! x
I'm sitting here watching Cats and Dogs with my boy who is refusing to go to sleep and I fancy a cuppa and some biscuits... I say biscuits because I won't just have one or even two if i start! but I just can't be bothered to get up and get them! maybe my laziness will help me on the route to weight loss! x
cherylxx
Silver Member
lol the amount of times ive not had a treat cause there was no one here to go get it for me.
Emma1904
Working on it
lol the amount of times ive not had a treat cause there was no one here to go get it for me.
Maybe we're missing a trick here! just stay lazy and you won't eat through the sheer fact that you can't be bothered to get it!
catdog
Amiguette
lol the amount of times ive not had a treat cause there was no one here to go get it for me.
lol i dont eat during the day i wait until mark gets home from work to get up and get me stuff
dunno why he puts up with me bless him, must be love haha.
cherylxx
Silver Member
we could call it the idle diet..... the bone idle diet, lol
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