So, today has gone well so far. I had my banana then a shake and then i had a couple of eggs in a salad. I felt like having that instead of 2 other 100 cal snacks today. I still have another shake to have and then dinner tonight is tostada. Oven baked flour tortilla (wrap) and once its lovely and crisp I top it with salad and 1/2 pack quorn pieces cooked with onions, peppers (but i dont have any so just onions today) and sometimes black beans (but not today). i ususally put a little light creme fraiche or sour cream on it but not got that either so dinner will only be 450 cals. lol. That will still leave me 150 cals to have later so I will decide what/if to have later. Working my way through my water.
Have been having some problems with Tabbys nursery so Ive decided to change. We are going to put her in the nursery at the Primary School she'll be going to so we are all going to have a visit there on Monday. I got sick of her coming home soaking wet from there. Her top and socks would be wet from playing in the water and her coat would be soaking from playing in the puddles outside. And she's constantly sick. No wonder. I know theyre prone to catch lots of bugs when they first start but she started in january and shes been off sick more than shes actually been there! So anyway. Thats been stressful. Deciding what to do. She really loves going to nursery and she loves her keyworker there. But as my hubby said, some of the staff have a devil may care attitude and dont particularly fill us with confidence. A few of the younger staff often have faces like they hate their jobs and dont particularly like kids. Not entirely thrilled having her go there anymore. So that's one major thing happening.
I got a text from hubby today. Apparently his mam's health has taken a turn for the worse. She's been in a pretty bad state for a while...lots of things wrong. But she had been managing. Its gotten to a point now where we are all pretty sure she is going to have to be taken into a home where she can get pretty constant care. In all honesty, I dont much care for the woman, but I dont like to see anyone suffer and she is my husband's mother. Regardless of their lack of much of a relationship these days, I know that on some level this will be painful for him to witness and to have to deal with. So I am hurting, for him. Also feeling a bit useless. lol. Ive offered to help in anyway I can but its situations likes these where being a foreigner is difficult because you have no idea what the done thing is or how to help or go about arranging things. I have no real idea as to how these things work. So I will do what I can but leave all the arranging and planning to her kids.
And of course then there is MY mother. She's fine. Except she just got a tablet and she's sending herself doolally with stress and panic attacks over learning how to use it. Yes really. She always does this. She's a techno-phobe to the point of ridiculousness. She makes herself ill over it. But aside from that, her new husband is going in for a hip replacement today and she's sh!t scared about that, too. THAT I can understand. The panic-attacks-over-the-tablet I try to be patient with her about and try to be sympathetic but its hard. lol. I just want to smack her and tell her....the very worst thing is that she DOES break it and then...SO WHAT its just a broken piece of machinery. Nothing bad will happen. lol. And furthermore, TABBY can use our ipad. Hello. Not that tricky. But anyway. Yes. The hip replacement. Its hard to be so far away when my mom is going through this. She is worried for him and I can only comfort her from a (very far) distance.
Zoe is doing wonderfully. Which I am thankful for. She's growing and thriving. I thought she would be more mobile by now...but she isnt. And I thought she would be more vocal by now, but she isnt that either. She is who she is. I know that Im working with her and she will do it all when she's good and ready. Its hard not to wonder if you've failed your kids somehow when they dont do "what it says they should in the books". Although, admittedly, Im not nearly as paranoid about that stuff this time around. With Tabby I was constantly measuring what she could and couldnt do and monitoring it. POintlessly. lol. I say all of this as my HEALTHY, HAPPY children and giggling and cooing and laughing and playing with one another. And really, thats all that matters.
Anyway. I just wanted to jot this stuff down because I do plan on reading back through this from time to time and seeing where my head is at different points along the way. What was going on. What I was thinking and feeling.
Im off to make my shake before it gets much later. LOL. Im actually not hungry.