Blergh! - FatFairNForty(ish) - my diary

[pandora]

oh dear what a muddled quandry you are in. I do hope that you can sort things out with this dear friend, if they are that dear then surely there must be some pathway which can lead to a discussion & an "agree to disagree" conclusion.
I really hope you find a "special someone", some people only find it once, let it go & then settle for less & others find it time & time again.
You deserve to be loved & cherished, you may find, as a friend of mine did, that being on your own for along time is your enemy because you don't allow yourself to let people in. She thankfully did in the end & is now happy.
I wish this for you too.
xx

 

[FatFairNForty(ish)]

Op's a no go

Off to see Ailsa now and feeling a lot brighter. Had a talk with my friend who I have really really hurt, will do more talking I am sure. Apologies made on both sides.

Just opened post - hospital said no to op. Am gutted. Will try and post later but need to get going as lots to talk to Ailsa about,not least the fact that she had a car accident yesterday! They are fine, no injuries thank goodness but car a write off!

Still in reflective mood but too busy to dwell....

 

[pandora]

oh hun, i'm really sorry to hear about the op decision. Don't really have any words of wisdom, just sending you hugs :hug99:
xx

 

[Karen1972]

Sorry to hear that hun.... i think it's rare that they agree to do these things these days!! When i spoke to my doctor about it one of the questions was about how long the weight had been maintained for.... maybe try again in a year or two??

 

[kazbro]

oh blimey
i really thought you would have been allowed the op
after all your hard work you deserve a bit of something back from the nhs
its not as if you asked them to take the fat away you did that all yourself, you got yourself healthy and did it all without there help
i think that desicion is cruel and unfair

really hope they change there minds in a few months
:hug99: jen

kaz xxx

 

[cah-ching]

Really sorry to read the NHS has said 'no' to the op. As Karen said may be in a year or two's time. Additionally you may experience some additional shrinkage by then.

Fingers crossed.

 

[SHAZA]

Really Really sorry about the op ~ maybe with your exercise and bike riding you will tone up and ask again next year.

Well done for apologizing to your dear friend, I have lost a very dear friend who I still miss around 2 years ago just because of stupid pride and not sorting it out. Dont loose your friend as they are few and far between and we need as many people around us as we can

On the confused man thing, who wants to be on their own and lonely ~ I have been with my lovely hubby since I was 15 so he is my sole mate and you deserve the same.

He doesnt have to be perfect ~ but as long as he ticks most of the boxes he's the one. Of course you need someone to share your life with even though its obvious from your posts that your life is very full with other things. Jennie you can still be lonely even with a very busy life ~ sometimes we are so busy to fill the cracks !

Hope you not too upset about the hospital thing ~ what will be will be

Love Love

Sharon

 

[Summerskye]

I believe the decision on whether to offer cosmetic surgery on the NHS varies considerably from area to area. It really is a postcode lottery!

I went to see my GP almost exactly a year ago to enquire whether or not I could have any work done on the NHS (we discussed a possible breast uplift, tummy tuck and work on my thighs/upper arms) and she looked into it for me.

A couple of weeks later I got a letter from her saying that the rules had changed in our region (I don't know what they were before), and that the only op that I would qualify for under the NHS now would be a tummy tuck - but ONLY if I proved that I had kept the weight off for at least 2 years :sigh:

As you know, I had the mastopexy (uplift) done privately and have another year to go before qualifying for a tummy tuck on the NHS. I'll just see how I feel then - and whether or not I've kept the weight off by then too of course - and decide what I want to do at the time.

My feeling at the moment is that I won't bother with it as it doesn't look nearly as bad as I think it did a year ago. I also agree with Shazza - with all that exercise I bet you'll find that your skin tones up far more than you expect too

Take care hon, and I'm glad you seem to have resolved things with your friend too.

Lots of love

 

[CW Consultant]

Hiya,

Have you thought about contacting Extreme Makeover, might be worth talking to Kerensa about this or Katie Perks Slimmer of the year 2005.

Worth a shot you have a great story.

Linda

 

[Summerskye]

Hiya,

Have you thought about contacting Extreme Makeover, might be worth talking to Kerensa about this or Katie Perks Slimmer of the year 2005.

Worth a shot you have a great story.

Linda

What a brilliant idea!

 

[FatFairNForty(ish)]

Feeling ok this evening, things smoothed out a lot with friend, other stuff still whirling - loads to do.
Weighed in - lost 3.4lbs this week that makes a total of 12 stone 7lbs now.

So, onto the 1200 plan I go! Went shopping on way home and can't wait for tomorrow and my first toasted crumpet in over a year! lol Although have to say, might not have one and might still opt for the couscous and quorn kind of meal I had tonight!

Stomach has been churning away and let's just say, I think I need to eat my big meal in the middle of the day as opposed to 8pm! It sounds like vesouvious and jet propultion (sp) doesn't come close!! (Am under strict instructions from Zoe to keep all doors closed and sealed!! lol

Ailsa was wonderful as ever despite still being shaken by her crash.

I have heaps of CDC stuff to do and have a heavy morning in the office tomorrow so am planning on getting to bed within the next hour and half with all things necessary done and a time management plan for tomorrow (I need it - trust me!)

Cried in Zoes arms tonight about various things. Glad she's home.

Right, best get on with it all! Think that things will be busy but in a very positive way. Will take on board your suggestion re the makeover show... apart from that it's a quick look in the Nisbets (catering suppliers) catalogue for a bacon slicer and job lot of blue plasters!!

Going to ring my nana tomorrow. Can't put it off any longer.

Thanks for the lovely comments all. Much love xxxxxxxx

 

[Eclipse]

Well done on the weigh in hun, you will disappear soon at this rate. Sorry to not have posted on your thread recently been a bit busy what with this and that, and now have another serious prob looming.

So sorry too to hear about the NHS decision, they did the same to me re my deflated balloons (boobs) and the crepe paper tummy, but I live with it, look OK clothed lol.

Emotions are crap at time aren't they hun, override everything else, but I always think they dictate how we deal with things at that particular moment. Not always the right option, but at the time, the only one. Otherwise how would we get through it all. Luvs ya xxx

 

[pandora]

amazing, losing 3.4lbs on 1000, i only just managed that when 100% SSing, you'll be telling us you're a size 8 next thing , seriously though, you're doing so well, glad Ailsa is so there for you.
xx

 

[FatFairNForty(ish)]

Bless you Cheryl (Eclipse)
You're right. Emotions etc... can't do it without them eh? Thanks for dropping in sweetheart, it's good to see you. I have no idea what I'm going to do about the skin now.. will have to hope that if I ever meet anyone that they can get beyond it and hope that the infections in my belly button end (another one now)... and that I learn to feel more positive about how I look nekkid - at the moment I reckon I could earn a fortune in a travelling circus as a freak show.

amazing, losing 3.4lbs on 1000, i only just managed that when 100% SSing, you'll be telling us you're a size 8 next thing , seriously though, you're doing so well, glad Ailsa is so there for you.
xx

I think the bike riding may have helped somewhat... and am up onto 1200 now so hopefully will maintain. I'm glad that ALL of you are here for me but yes, Ailsa is an absolute Godsend.

Thanks Cheryl(s)

xxxxxxx

 

[pandora]

i bought myself a new bike a few months back, its been out a couple of times, i really need to find somewhere nice to ride (roads are so boring) & get e decent saddle (my ass hurts for days after)
xx

 

[CW Consultant]

Hi Jennie,

Don't know if you have seen this link before, Amanda was turned down for surgery by her PCT but won the appeal.

Half The Woman She Used To Be (from Thurrock Gazette)

 

[FatFairNForty(ish)]

I feel the need to respond to the comments re the hosp decision that were posted on previous pages on here.. as I neglected to do so earlier...

Firstly thank you - you are all fabulous caring people and I value you each one of you.

I don't think that people realise that I hide the problems I have very well with clothes. When I am undressed it is utterly obscene. I can't go swimming any more. I look like the elephant man. Those who have seen it properly know this. It isn't a case of it'll tone up - it won't, it can't. It is flaps of skin. There is no substance to it whatsoever - when I am in the bath it floats. When I go to the toilet it gets in the way. It is not something that is going to go without surgery, it can't, plain and simple. It isn't going to improve. It isn't possible for it to improve. It weighs at least a stone overall. I'm not even going to begin to describe my 'breasts'. My skin hasn't got a cat in hell's chance of recovering any more than it already has. End of. Surgery is the only option. My trainer at the gym,GP and nurse agree. Totally. The NHS was and is my only option. I have another infection in my belly button and, if I wasn't such a clean person am certain there would be other incredibly nasty infections going on too. I know and understand that this is cosmetic surgery, but this isn't vanity - it's sanity. I don't know if I 'deserve' it or not. I am not in a position to say, what I do know is that I have not even been seen by anyone and the decision was made. Nobody has physically looked at my body so how can they decide without even seeing me up close and personal? I just wish they would have given me the chance to show my problem to someone who just might have been able to help me. Even if they said I had to maintain for a year or two... that at least would give me hope. But to write me off without even seeing me. To force me into losing more and more weight to suit their preconceptions of what is an acceptable BMI and then say no. I don't think that is fair. I'm going to see my GP and tell him how I feel and ask what we can do next. I'm not going to give up. Not yet. Asking for surgery was not an easy thing to do. I know it is major surgery and costs a lot of money. I know too that there are arguments for and against the NHS using essential funds to do this kind of work. I am not stupid. I wouldn't have asked if it hadn't been a last resort.

I am an optimist, one way or another things will improve and something positive will happen. To lose hope is not an option. I shall do my damndest. I'm not going to say any more about it as I need to remain positive about all the other stuff that's going on right now, but I shall deal with it.

I have to get on now as it's almost midnight and I need to do more work before bed. I am not going to miss my curfew though. I need sleep.

I'll have a look at that article CD, thank you

Goodnight all, and thank you again for your love and support. It is, as ever, truly appreciated. xxxx

 

[Summerskye]

Jennie, I know exactly what you're saying having had the privilege (and I mean exactly that) of seeing what your problem is.

I do think your GP may be far more receptive than the hospital - as mine was. Do go to see him/her and hopefully you'll get a far better, and more personal, appraisal.

Good luck honey

Much love

 

[FatFairNForty(ish)]

Thanks Sharon


Well, I can't believe it's gone 9pm already! What a day! Almost managed to make my curfew last night (only half an hour or so over...)... and up at 5.30 this morning! Steamed into the day - got loads done . Very odd getting up before the sun but blimey does it mean you can cram a lot in! I got lots of paperwork done and emails sorted and sent ready to print out... (paid for)... placed my very first CD order Dead exciting! Can't wait for it to arrive tomorrow! Loads to say but as I have already written it 3 times and been a muppet and lost the lot am going to take the hint and sod off now! lol

Didn't call my nana, just can't bring myself to do it...

Appointment made with GP for Thursday morning to moan groan and try to see what can be done but have decided that I'm not going to let it get to me to the point of driving me mad. I have enough to think about right now. That is one battle that can wait it's turn in the ever-growing queue.

Hope all have had a good day... mine's been very busy but ok.

 

[SHAZA]

Oh Jennie

You do hide your problem very very well and no one including me would have any idea of whats going on under your size 10 jeans ~ you look amazing and you would never know

Dont give in but you are right to stay positive ~ yes you 100% deserve to be helped as it sounds like a practical medical problem that needs surgery not just a flippant remark "I need a tummy tuck" which we all are guilty of saying in a jokey kind of way

I hope you get on well with your doc and quote "dignity" that word is magic in the NHS ~ give it a go and see what happens

All exciting about your stuff arriving oh wait untill the first knock on the door really excited and proud of you

You are doing an excellent job of "juggling" all the Jennie issues as you have alot going on at the moment ~ some good ~ some bad ~ some bit lost not sure whats going on here kind of thing

Your life is defo a roller coaster girly

Don't forget to enjoy the ride Jennie !!!! (not forgettig to count your blessing and stop to smell the roses on the way)

Love Love and a big fat hug

x x x x x x

oh funny little thing ~ got to laugh or I would cry. I was really brave swallowed my stupid pride and asked for some help with a long term bladder problem so went to local hosp today. Saw lovely female doc thought oh thats good then got took into another room to see a big handsome Denzil Washington lookie likie. Oh er never mind on the couch and all that crap ~ he was talking away in his lovely velvet voice to the female doc then he said oh Mrs Betts stomach is very soft and pliable because she has lost so much weight and proceeded to "hoik" my big fat jelly belly out of the way and said Big cough now Mrs Betts. Floor opening and me falling in time

OMG Just giggled and said need a tummy tuck !!!!! But I could have died oh well could be worse I suppose !!