Blergh! - FatFairNForty(ish) - my diary

Just remembered! I get weighed on Wednesday this week because I am off to Silverstone on Thursday to the Day of Champions - big bike thing for charity.. am really looking forward to it but will be weird walking around on my own!

HWSNBN is still irritating the crap out of me - without meaning to , *sigh* I really HAVE to do something...

This evening I baked my very first ever muffin! My younger daughter was here and she said they were very good - but I messed up a batch of chocolate ones which I kind of rescued by smothering with homemade chocolate buttercream...

I am struggling today - feeling emotional too for some reason.. not sure why... am wondering if it's because of all the Fathers Day hype... I miss my dad so much... and my stepdad too now... will be thinking of them both on the day.. and wishing they were both here on earth still to talk to and laugh with and share with... my dad died when I was 21 (he was 50)... my stepdad died a year last November...

Found myself crying watching telly yesterday... really odd...

Must get an early night tonight... in fact... think I'll turn in now... and wear earplugs.. as I woke in the early hours and HWSNBN was driving the cows home and I couldn't get back to sleep... will never understand how he can sleep through MY snoring!

Ho hum... am really feeling in need of some love and attention, but that ain't gonna happen so blergh! Book, bath and bed for me!

Night night all - will hopefully be a chirpier soul tomorrow!
xx
 
Weary today - can't seem to shake off this tiredness... wonder if it's emotional stuff messing around inside and affecting the rest of me... hmm.. anyhow... better day in many ways and very very productive at work although not so much at home.. usual story - get home from work and Shrek is already glued to the telly... I now realise why he knows so much about so much! He does nothing but watch telly all the damn time! No idea what time he finally turned the damn thing off last night - I was already fast asleep... and he turned it on after my alarm went off at 6.30 this morning... no wonder the leccy is running out so fast these days!!! argh!! every time I start to type on here he comes in... laters! xx
 
HelenG said:
Love the bike shaped bikkies!:drool:
How did it go with Ursula in the end? Did she revert to type or has she still been invaded by a nice parasite?:rolleyes:
Click to expand...


Bikkies are getting easier to bake each time so hopefully will get them all right soon, lol

Ursula was unnervingly nice but she still insisted of having her BBQ food for free because "of all her hard work" !! Bloomin' cheek! I think she spent about 10 minutes serving folk and that was all... oh well, it was a sucessful day so it doesn't matter now... and she's reverting to type on one of the forums ... lol... knew it couldn't last! lol

Weigh-in tomorrow! Not expecting much as not been the full week but still hoping to see those scales down a few lbs... feeling really really cold and tired., I remember being cold before... but the tiredness is a bit of a pain...

think another bubble bath and early night may be in order...

baked again tonight - this time I had a try at raspberry muffins and coconut & sultana muffins... the dog and HWSNBN enjoyed them so I think I might add them to my list of baking goodies!

looking forward to making a very very special birthday girl bike cake for my mate whose birthday it will be when I am at a rally in a fortnight and have persuaded her to be there! Cards and bunting already bought, and icing colouring etc... should be a lovely rally too - HWSNBN won't be there! PEACE!!!!!!!!!! lol
 
well, had my weigh in - that's one month under my belt and another 4lbs lost! Making 2stone 2lbs in one month and 2 days! Not a bad result even if I do say so myself... I know that the coming weeks cannot match that but, I am aiming for a stone a month from hereon in so should be getting down to a reasonable size pretty soon - need to see what clothes I have that I can now get back into - last time I wore my jeans I hated how they looked so am hoping not to feel quite so appalled now.. if I can remember where I put them that is!!

Have had a nightmare of a day so far - overslept, dashed around wrapping presents for my elder daughters birthday (she's an unbelievable 24 years old tomorrow!!) ... and had to get them ready to send in the post - then I knew I couldn't cope without my breakfast so made a choc mint muffin and then dashed off to work - realised halfway there that I was almost out of petrol and with the warning light flashing "3 miles" on the fuel gauge I knew it was nothing but providence that I made it to a petrol station in time!! Got to work half an hour late (not too worried on that front as very often stay an hour extra for nowt)... and then... the little darling in the adjacent playgroup were having a screaming and banging contest today... this was topped up nicely with the glazier arriving to replace the 2 smashed windows that some little oik had decided to chuck a brick through 2 months ago... so... total upheaval and mega noisy... couldn't get near my desk, pc, filing cabinets etc due to ladders, tools, workmen and bits of broken glass flying around... not to mention all the hammering that seemed to be so vital to the job in hand... the only quiet time was when he put the putty in!!

Had to clear the tops of the cabinets and bookcase and desk too so that was all piled on the conference table which left me sitting at the end of the table handwriting a load of stuff which needed doing, but not ideal... was glad when he finished the windows and the playgroup ended for the day... but not a particularly productive time!!

Then I drove to my weigh in to find her road closed (new estate, road being tarmacced) no signs up ... just reach the workmen and have to reverse miles! Then walk! Grrrr... grouchy mare doesn't even come close!

THEN realised I had left my purse in the car so had to walk back and get it to get my food for the coming week... then went to tesco and bought my daughter the loveliest card ever and some Dr Pepper Zero and Coke Zero.. along with some ingredients to have a go at making gingerbread men...

Got back to my town and ready to go into post office when I realised.... card was in trolley back in Tesco car park some 15 sodding miles away!!! GRRRRRR!

Rang them,. yep, sure enough, they had it ... blah!! So... bought another card instead and sent that along with massive parcel - hope she likes it! She's a very good baker and needs more equipment so I sent her some muffin tins, spring form mini cake tins, mixing bowls, biscuit cutter and 2 of my muffins I baked last night... hope it arrives ok tomorrow!! Oh and some cake boards too!

Eventually got home and HWSNBN and I have to talk... I can't carry on feeling like I do so texted him this morning (trust me, it IS the only way) that we would need to talk this afternoon to do some rearranging... (I think he knew what I meant as he hasn't utterered a word to me since I got home...)... I am so tired though and was about to suggest we sit and talk when he got a call... from an employment agency... another rejection...

*sigh* what can I do? I need to resolve things but feel so sorry for him now... and he has a real hang-dog expression right now... I've been on the brink of tears all day as I know what I'm going to suggest is going to hurt us both... and I feel such a failure for not succeeding with our relationship...but I'm worn out trying to make it work...

I care about him, but I care about just about everyone... I don't know what to do... blah!

Moaning Minnie signing off xxxx
 
Goodness, after having the day you have just had, no one would call you a moaning minnie, Jennie.

Bit more importantly well done on another 4lbs off and the total of 30lbs in such a short time. Mega jealous and must really do something about it.

Sorry, that Shrek got another rejection but you really must think of your wellbeing first and foremost. He is expecting a chat so have it. You cant keep putting it off because you feel sorry for him.

Your daughters birthday present sounds marvellous and such a good idea.

Take care of yourself.

Pam xxx
 
I know it won't help much but I really do feel for you. I went through a similar situation with my ex husband, lovely guy and he never put a foot wrong but i just wasn't "in" love with him, we stayed together far too long and in the end every little thing he did bugged the hell out of me, even the way he breathed when he slept!!

So hard ending a relationship though even when you know its not working and its for the best so my thoughts are with you and i hope it all works out whatever you decide to do :) x
 
:hug99: Jennie

As Pam said - you need to go ahead with that talk. You have enough to contend with and once the talk is started you can at least move forward:eek:

Huge congrats on the loss so far - I'm two weeks behind you so I'm keeping close tabs:p

Have you been out on Hattie yet?
 
Big hugs sweetie.. have the talk as soon as you can at least then you can both start to make plans for the future.

Well done on weigh in xxx
 
Well done on the weight loss honey, sorry been awol most of the day as mega busy x

Its Ash's birthday tomorrow too lol x

I don't know what to suggest re Voldermort, but you cannot go on for ever more feeling like this honey x x
 
bottled out... feel even worse now as it's hanging over us... bedtime though and not in the mood for an argument at this time of night... off to Silverstone tomorrow afternoon for Day of Champions so hopefully that will be nice... going on my own though so not sure how enjoyable it will be but at least I will have some peace! lol Hope it doesn't rain!!

Night night xx oh and Cheryl... am soooo jealous... send back some sunshine please as my bike seat comes back tomorrow and I need to get out and ride my bike before my epic journey darn sarf next weekend! lol xxx
 
HelenG said:
:hug99: Jennie

As Pam said - you need to go ahead with that talk. You have enough to contend with and once the talk is started you can at least move forward:eek:

Huge congrats on the loss so far - I'm two weeks behind you so I'm keeping close tabs:p

Have you been out on Hattie yet?
Click to expand...

Thank you - on all levels... not been out on Hattie yet as she has no seat.. its due back tomorrow so, if back before dark and weather conducive I shall take her out for a tootle! :D:D:D
 
Hope you had a fab time at Silverstone:D

Has Hattie got her seat back:p
 
Just popping on quick - had a FANTASTIC afternoon at Silverstone and just baked loads of muffins (choc chip, lemon & sultana, coconut, blueberry) and fairy cakes for the brownies to sell on Saturday and all cleared up and ready to turn in. Met LOADS of lush, fit, I mean.. met lots of very talented motorcyclists today... hehehehe ... and had my piccie taken with some of them too!
Been a really tiring but very enjoyable time... Hattie's seat arrived just as I was setting off to work this morning so, tomorrow I will try it out and hopefully be able to go out on her for a ride!

Stuck to my diet and looking forward to next weigh in, although have to wait another week for that... still... felt so much more confident today knowing I was back in my jeans (although they look horrendous!).. hence no leg shots!!

N'night all xxxx hope you've had a good day too - or at least, the best you could! xxx
 

Attachments

  • Loris Capirossi.jpg
    Loris Capirossi.jpg
    493.2 KB · Views: 136
  • Bradley Smith.jpg
    Bradley Smith.jpg
    495.1 KB · Views: 148
  • 261.jpg
    261.jpg
    490.9 KB · Views: 144
  • 199.jpg
    199.jpg
    488.9 KB · Views: 156
p.s. HWSNBN was on a real downer when I got home... slagging himself off... putting himself down... if I didn't know better I would say he was being deliberately self-depracating so I won't say what needs saying..... shoot me... I'm a cynic... *sigh* off to dream of fit young men in tight leathers and big lumps of throbbing machinery between their legs!! hehehehehe
 
What a BRRRRRRRILLIANT afternoon I've had! Took Hattie out for a ride to Grafham Water and back... loved it!! Bit nervous on the way but oh soooo happy - really blew the cobwebs away! I KNOW that riding her will help me lose weight because as I get smaller I will be able to get some better fitting trousers that will be a lot more flexible and therefore make riding even more fun!!

Even HWSNBN has been more upbeat because he asked to ride with me and I said yes... have to admit, he kept impatient car and van drivers well back which definitely helped!! He's just gone to the shops to get cigarettes so I handed him a long list of baking ingredients and asked if he'd mind.... he didn't object so I am going to be busy baking again tonight - but I'll be doing some for Church, some for the Brownies, some for the bike club event on Sunday and some for him... I have it all planned.. .lol.. sad sod... x number of fairy cakes, x number of muffins, x number of Anzac biscuits and x number of miniature victoria sponge birthday cakes!
Time limit set of 11.30pm finish so - it's pinny on, sleeves rolled up, and bowls and spoons at the ready!!

Oh, did I mention... I rode my lovely Hattie today... heheheheh HUGE grins!
 

Attachments

  • Hattie and Me at Grafham Water our first ride out.jpg
    Hattie and Me at Grafham Water our first ride out.jpg
    376.3 KB · Views: 113
  • Hattie Home.jpg
    Hattie Home.jpg
    439.3 KB · Views: 112
thought I would come and say Hello, our paths have crossed on a couple of other diaries.

What a gorgeous machine Hattie is !

Off to our first rally of the year tomorrow-can wait
 
Did you ride Hattie today by any chance:p
What a HUGE GRIN :D
Baking sounded absolutely :drool: til you got to the anzac biscuits :yuk:
 
You must log in or register to reply here.

Similar threads

Y
Weight loss journey intro -
Replies
5
Views
2K
Zafira
Zafira
F
Getting fit for 40! My diary (feel free to join me)
Replies
13
Views
3K
AliGal
AliGal
Cheekypasterfield
Live, Love, Eat & Repeat
Replies
6
Views
1K
Cheekypasterfield
Cheekypasterfield
goose
Goose's final road to goal
2
Replies
32
Views
5K
goose
goose
elle2585
It’s been over a decade - back here to get comfy
Replies
4
Views
775
elle2585
elle2585
Back
Top