I just wrote you a massive message and annoyingly lost it!!
OK here goes again. Breastfeeding is really hard but it does get better once you both learn it. Its really hard not to get frustrated with yourelf and your baby.
First am going to send you a link for the article from derby city hospital I think its pretty good.
http://www.derbyhospitals.nhs.uk/easysiteweb/getresource.axd?assetid=2815&type=0&servicetype=1
Rather than try and explain the holds I do with Daniel (which I did on my first message) - if you look at page 5 I do the top picture. I sit up straight (perhaps even leaning a bit forward when I start). You need to get the latch working first and if this is wrong it will hurt.
If you been trying this position and they are killing then try a different position. My right hand nipple is cracked and swollen and hence killing (and ha for the last few days). I tried this morning to do the bowling ball position (picture 2 on page 5). This is a lot harder to hold and really your best sitting on an arm chair so you can put her on the arm to make it easier to hold the weight. (I did this with Amy initially),
If you look at page 6 I do the steps in that for getting Daniel to latch on. The key is to be relaxed (harder said than done when you know the pain to come). Dont get frustrated with yourself of Keira when it doesnt work as that makes you get frustrated and its harder to get her on.
Hand express a little bit first (thats on page 13 ) - you need to cup your breast with your thumb and finger next to the thumb into a C so that the finger/ thumb are behind the areola. Pressing down (but towards the nipple) about 10-15 times to stimulate the flow of milk. When you get a few droplets try and tease her to open her mouth. Dont put the breast in until her mouth is wide open as she will clamp down on your nipple. If she gets your nipple then instantly put your finger in to unclamp her mouth. Dont pull the nipple out without unclamping.
It shouldnt hurt (or at least shouldnt kill) once she is on correctly - if your nipple feels cracked and massive it might still hurt a bit but not like before - well mine still hurts a bit. If you hear a clicking sound then she isnt on preoperly and if you hear sucking but air (almost like fast sucking through a straw) then also not on properly. If you look at her she should have her chin touching your breast (no gaps) - if not she isnt on properly. If you look at her jaw (near the ears) they should be moving in a sucking motion.
There should be a pattern. the first 10 or so sucks will be hard and powerful and they do hurt. Once that has passed she should be in a pattern of few sucks and a rest, few sucks and a rest etc. i think every so often they might do the powerful sucks to restimulate the nipple.
If she falls asleep, or the sucking changes to no swallowing (you would expect at least 5 mins of this proper sucking - i would reckon 10-15 mins really unless tired and it might be longer). If the pattern has change to a constant sucking without swallowing its for comfort. Unlatch, i recommend stripping down and changing to try and wake them and get them more alert and feed on the otehr side. Always try this as it fills them for loinger. If they took a good amount on the first side you wouldnt expect them to take that much on the 2nd side (they should really be coming off themselves but they dont always).
Make sure you wind her as well - if she is crying and bringing her knees up to her chest this means they have wind (and they would get this on the bottle too). You want to try and get the wind up (if she is windy buy some infacol - i started on it yesterday pm). It takes 3 days or so to work and will help bring the wind up efficiently.
This leaflet is also good on the poos and wees (dont get hung up about the poo - Daniel didnt poo at all on day 4 and i was so upset) - he pood on day 5 though (it turned green on day 5 and hadnt turned yellow). It didnt turn yellow til day 9 (yesterday) and they arent worried. as long as he getting lots of wee - and we getting a lot!!
if you are gettng those urates then she isnt feeding enough and you need help (Amy had them, they are a concern but if you get the help and support you dont need to give up).
Oh and if your breast is too full try hand expressing a bit off as well It must be hard enough for a baby to get on never mind a full breast (i had to do this the other day as Daniel fed for about 3.5 hours, before i got some support from the midwives). He is now feeding for max an hour at a time and sleeping in between after keeping him awake for about an hour.
However tempting it is - dont give her a dummy yet (although they say wait til 4 weeks my midwife said you can do it if they are feeding well by 2-3 weeks you can do it then). I am counting down the days and doing it at 2 weeks and 4 days! Lol Another 8 days and he is getting it!!
Hope this helps - that article is really good (i have a leaflet stating all of that and I have referred to it a fair few times already)!