ConstantlyDizzy 2015

[constantlydizzy]

morning ladies, well it was 5 wks yesterday since losing my Tony....a very long hard 5 weeks, ending in me getting devastating news from my neighbour and good friend that shes been diagnosed with cancer again (she survived breast cancer almost 12 years ago) this time it is widespread thru her body and they say there is no chance of any treatment helping its terminal and they've simply advised that she gets her affairs sorted quite quickly. Im utterly broken by this latest news, life is just not playing fair at the moment. I definitely need to think about moving back home if I can but all the upheaval is overfacing to think about. sorry that everytime I come on here lately it seems to be for a moan.....xx

 

[Happy Holidays]

Awww that is sad news about your friend, like we've said before it will help you coming here & saying how you feel. Just take your time about moving & do it when you're ready, there is no rush. Otherwise how are you coping?

 

[Liverbird52]

So sorry to hear your sad news x
Just think about moving and don't rush into anything ..we are here for you anytime xx

 

[constantlydizzy]

thanks ladies. I'm doing ok (ish) end up going to bed around 7 most nights to watch telly as its just so damn lonely without tony at the mo. Ive started my counselling at the hospice...only been once so far but I got a lot off my chest and been given a course of complimentary therapies to have starting next week.
I braved going back to the funeral directors and picked up tonys ashes yesterday....that was hard to do. I now have to decide what to do with them as we never really discussed it. for now il just keep them tho.
its Friday at last and I reckon ive earned a glass of wine or two xx

 

[Texty_F]

Hello my dizzy duck thinking of you.

How are you doing lovely xxx

 

[constantlydizzy]

Hello my dizzy duck thinking of you.

How are you doing lovely xxx

im ok but finding things very hard here at the moment. Iv just had to make the heartbreaking decision to give eric back to the lady from the rescue home....shes going to come and get him in a couple of weeks. I just cant look after him properly, cant walk him and its just not fair to eric. another decision ive made once eric has gone is to spend a little time back over in Yorkshire with my family where I can hopefully come to a decision about whether to sell up or not.....im 90% certain its what I need to do.i just need to be nearer to people I know right now.
Sandra has got very ill this last week and I haven't seen much of her at all....im kind of laying low as she has family coming and going each day so don't want to intrude too much, it has however made me realise just how lonely life will be here in the future.
well id best get dressed and do some cleaning I suppose.....don't know where all the dust comes from!! x

 

[*Emsie*]

Sounds like you know what you want to do but good idea to just try it out for a while before making the final decision xx

 

[chocko1]

Hi Kathryn. I was just looking through some of the diaries, when I spotted your name. Hadn't seen or heard from you for ages so thought I'd take a look on your site to hear how things were going. I'm so very, very sorry to hear about Tony. How absolutely awful for you. I'm so glad you are coming on here for some support and that you have somewhere to off-load. I can't begin to imagine the pain you must be feeling and wish things could be so very different for you.

You are in my thoughts.

Kathy xx

 

[constantlydizzy]

hello all, and thanks for taking time to post.
Things are pretty much the same here....trying to get through each day without crying - but failing miserably. Ive made some headway on the house front though....Ive got a decorator coming to do both bedrooms (the only 2 rooms tony never got chance to do after he got really ill with it) Ive just been and bought some wallpaper ....just anaglypta stuff to be painted after, then I can get someone to tidy the weeds a bit in the garden and get the house on the market. The lady at the rescue home has someone interested in giving eric a forever home, so at least he might not go back to the kennels which is good. Im just waiting for them to give me a text for any questions they have (its a real pain struggling to hear on the phone....I really need to save up and buy myself the adapter thing for my baha aid so I can use phones easier)
On the weight front ive managed to drop a stone and a half in 7 1/2 weeks, its really because im barely eating but hey...il take it Once ive got more of a plan as to whats happening with my housing then im going to do my best to get back on track with my eating as it will be something to focus on. Time now to have a cuppa and face the washing/ironing that ive been neglecting. xx

 

[*Emsie*]

Nice to hear off you. Try and eat though lovely, weight loss like that's not good for you xx