Ok I've gained 3lbs this week but it's totally ok with me. It's been quite the week! After a traumatic weekend I was waiting anxiously for totm, it hasn't appeared and seems I'm 3 weeks pregnant. I found out yesterday, so there's been a lot of discussion, lots of finding out where I stand Uni wise and we went to the dr this morning to find out the options and how long we've got to decide. We were veering way more towards yes than no, but something clicked this morning and I just thought why are we putting this massive pressure on ourselves. We realised we both want it, but not to happen in nov (that's when it would come) as ill be just starting 3rd year it's just too much pressure. So we are going to actually plan this for August. Now really would make it so hard for all of us, and if we tried and succeeded July-sept cycles it would tie into me finished 3rd year and having 5 months to settle down and just enjoy having a baby rather than the massive pressure of trying to juggle everything. Plus I want to quit smoking, lose some more weight, and get fit and healthy and learn to drive. This way takes the pressure off entirely. Yeah I'd be pregnant in 3rd year but that's ok, I can deal with pregnancy. For what I want to do over the next 5 years now actually is the best time, but not this minute. 5 months time would be perfect. Pretty anxious about the next few weeks but it'll be ok. It's the right decision for now. And I'm really really excited about doing all this properly and planning it all. I want this last summer to do all the things I planned and be really focused to finish my degree to the absolute best ability I can. But this happening has made us really think about what we want and when would be good. Phew.. I'm kinda writing all this down for myself so I can see my own logic and know when all these things happen. I kinda wish my diary wasn't public though! At least I know why I haven't been able to stop eating! I've been
ravenous expecting totm all week so now I get it!
So today is my refocusing day. I now have some
Pretty serious goals so no more messing around
EE DAY - Friday
Breakfast : wmeal toast with 3 WW sausages, 2 poached eggs, 100g beans with a
big grilled tomato (
1.5syns)
Lunch : homemade
tomato soup, an
apple
Dinner : thai yellow curry (
3.5syns) with chicken,
babycorn, peppers, carrot, mushroom, sugar snap peas, and brown rice.
Snack : 1 small wmeal toast with Vegemite (
4.5syns) Cadbury egg (
5syns)
banana.
pickled onions. Celery sticks, satsuma
Drinks : lots of water (I'm so so thirsty!)
Exercise : 2 mile walk, 30 day shred
TOTAL SYNS : 14.5