Fat Experiences

Samprand said:
mental health and weight issues have the same level of stigma attached - some people are so ignorant!

by the way i love ur avatar lol and well done on ur amazing weight loss!
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They are, it's annoying :mad::(

Aww thank you :) it is totally me at the moment so it fitted and thank you for the well done :) it's been a journey and a half, but i'm determined I'll get there :)
 
im sure u will, you are doing fantastically! :)
 
I got fed up of the are you pregnant question.. So the last time someone asked me if I was . I just looked them straight in the eye and said "No.. Just fat" with a big smile on my face..Weirdly,, no one has ever asked me that question since.. I have to admit I did feel slightly sorry for the person who'd asked me the question.. Their face was a picture :D

I was in Rome with some girl friend a few years back and we were on the Metro... The train pulled into a station and an elderly "gent" wanted to get off.. I was standing next to the back of one of the seats.. He said excuse me and I tried to move but had know were to go.. At which point he called me Porcka!!!

Charming... Starngly he had no problem with the other people in his way!!!
 
Christiana said:
People can be so cruel. I've decided that from now on, if someone decides to make a comment (either directly or passively) I will give them like for like.

Seriously, this kind of thing is not acceptable at all. We were discussing this in our class yesterday evening - I was once asked to LEAVE a clothing store, moments after I walked in. I was told nothing there would fit me, so there was no point in me coming in. I often get funny looks/giggles/whispers when going to clothes shops with my size 10 friend, but that was the first time anyone had said anything like that to me directly.

The worst part was the woman said it as though it was the most normal thing in the world to say to someone...she was almost very "matter-of-fact" about it!
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This happened to me too. I've only been actually asked to leave once, but have been looked at like a fish out of water a million times in shops!

Oddly I've had more negative "faux positive" insults than out and out "you're fat" comments. Bunches of guys trying to pull the fattest chick at the bar, guys yelling "aw what a beautiful girl you are" and then laughing raucously or such like.

For me it always tends to be groups of guys. The worst example I can think of is when I was sitting waiting at a bus stop late one night. I had been out with friends so had my red lipstick on and actually felt pretty good about myself. Four guys wandered up and decided to start laughing at me for trying to look good. "It's like putting lipstick on a f*cking dog, man. Don't bother. Get back inside where you belong." is a line that particularly sticks in my mind.

I've also had people making cow noises as I went past, or tittering and saying "thar she blows"...
 
Some people (although obviously deeply unhappy unstable people) have such a nasty almost evil vindictive streak. theres no need for any1 to come out with comments like that, what gives them the right to intrude on your life like that and make u feel bad about who u are when its THEM who should feel bad for the pathetic excuse of a person they are.

I know sometimes people make 'accidental' comments (for want of a better term) when for example u might be with a friend and they say 'I saw so-and-so the other day and omg shes piled on the pounds shes huge!', in a way thats forgivable - i think? lol - but to come out with direct, undeserved abuse is just highlighting the ugly side of some people's personality.

I for one can honestly say that if i was with someone who made a nasty comment to an unsuspecting total stranger, I would be mortified and would probably reconsider the company i choose to keep!

ahhh rant over :D
 
I just remembered another "fat" incident, I once went to my brother's parent evening (this was 2008ish) and the teacher thought I was his mum, most embarassing moment E V E R. On the other hand, having lost some weight, I can now be mistaken to be a high-schooler? :S jheez what a difference weight loss can make!
 
Christiana said:
People can be so cruel. I've decided that from now on, if someone decides to make a comment (either directly or passively) I will give them like for like.

Seriously, this kind of thing is not acceptable at all. We were discussing this in our class yesterday evening - I was once asked to LEAVE a clothing store, moments after I walked in. I was told nothing there would fit me, so there was no point in me coming in. I often get funny looks/giggles/whispers when going to clothes shops with my size 10 friend, but that was the first time anyone had said anything like that to me directly.

The worst part was the woman said it as though it was the most normal thing in the world to say to someone...she was almost very "matter-of-fact" about it!
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What an utter low life human being he/she must've been! How cruel! People really do NOT realise the impact these things can have on us.

It's like you're being told you're not good enough! If I were you, I would go back to that store when I had lost all the weight make that cow run about finding me clothes and then walk out and say this shop is a load of crap *insert store name* is better than this garbage! I'm so angry just typing this! The cheek! Uff! :mad:

I'm sorry you had to go through that :eek:
 
I thought i posted this, obv not....

I went the gym last wednesday (this was after the incident after sw, so my confidence was nonexistent as it was) I went with a friend, who is larger than me (but not by much)

I was on the bikes, and she had done her bit, and went to the lockers to get my phone for me. She came back and said there were a group of guys who were looking at us and sniggering....i just laughed it off saying that they must be overcompensating for having a little manhood

When we were done, the same guys were still in the corner, sniggering, one made a comment and said "Seriously- why do porkers even bother? They're just going to eat pies when they get home. Fat people should be shot"

I was so close to lobbing a dumbell at them....my friend didnt hear them, thank god.

I mean ffs, i've struggled with depression for YEARS. i have to go out drugged up so i don't have a panic attack, and i'm trying to not self-harm, which is proving to be extremely difficult....and they go and do that

thats 3 in only a short period of time :(
 
little_bubblez said:
I thought i posted this, obv not....

I went the gym last wednesday (this was after the incident after sw, so my confidence was nonexistent as it was) I went with a friend, who is larger than me (but not by much)

I was on the bikes, and she had done her bit, and went to the lockers to get my phone for me. She came back and said there were a group of guys who were looking at us and sniggering....i just laughed it off saying that they must be overcompensating for having a little manhood

When we were done, the same guys were still in the corner, sniggering, one made a comment and said "Seriously- why do porkers even bother? They're just going to eat pies when they get home. Fat people should be shot"

I was so close to lobbing a dumbell at them....my friend didnt hear them, thank god.

I mean ffs, i've struggled with depression for YEARS. i have to go out drugged up so i don't have a panic attack, and i'm trying to not self-harm, which is proving to be extremely difficult....and they go and do that

thats 3 in only a short period of time :(
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I'm sorry you had to go through that :(

That is absolutely horrible! Those guys are lacking in the department below so feel they need to make it up by picking on others.

Jokes apart, someone who feels the need to critisize others (intentionally trying to belittle them) has a flaw of her/his own, I've experienced this too.

The only thing I can say is keep your head high and don't ever let anyone bring you down, I believe it was Roosevelt who said No one can make you feel inferior without your consent - I am a strong believer of this, do not let them get to you, that is what he was aiming for, don't let him succeed.

Keep doing what you're doing, and keep up the great work! x
 
fatty2slim said:
It's like you're being told you're not good enough! If I were you, I would go back to that store when I had lost all the weight make that cow run about finding me clothes and then walk out and say this shop is a load of crap *insert store name* is better than this garbage! I'm so angry just typing this! The cheek! Uff! :mad:
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Oooo, I love that idea! A true Pretty Woman moment :D (you remember, when she goes back to the posh shop, dressed like a lady, and has a go at the assistant who refused to sell her clothes when she was wearing her normal -not so posh!- clothes! :D )
 
fatty2slim said:
I'm sorry you had to go through that :(

That is absolutely horrible! Those guys are lacking in the department below so feel they need to make it up by picking on others.

Jokes apart, someone who feels the need to critisize others (intentionally trying to belittle them) has a flaw of her/his own, I've experienced this too.

The only thing I can say is keep your head high and don't ever let anyone bring you down, I believe it was Roosevelt who said No one can make you feel inferior without your consent - I am a strong believer of this, do not let them get to you, that is what he was aiming for, don't let him succeed.

Keep doing what you're doing, and keep up the great work! x
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thanks hun that helps

i've always had low confidence, and comments like that, even though i don't let people think that they're getting to me, crush me.

Just the thought of going the gym now starts off a panic attack. i know that i just need to ride through it....but it's so hard :(
 
Book-Worm said:
Oooo, I love that idea! A true Pretty Woman moment :D (you remember, when she goes back to the posh shop, dressed like a lady, and has a go at the assistant who refused to sell her clothes when she was wearing her normal -not so posh!- clothes! :D )
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Haha, yes I love that film! I would be the biggest drama queen to the people who deserve it if I was confident enough, can't believe some people!
 
little_bubblez said:
thanks hun that helps

i've always had low confidence, and comments like that, even though i don't let people think that they're getting to me, crush me.

Just the thought of going the gym now starts off a panic attack. i know that i just need to ride through it....but it's so hard :(
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Awww *hugs* I can relate to what you're saying because us humans are our own enemies! We love to slate and curse each other!

Look at it this way, those people who judge us have no idea what we have been through, they have no right to make silly assumptions, therefore their opinions don't matter. If they knew you as a person and based a judgement upon that, it may hurt me a little if they were cruel to me, but for someone to say awful things about me, not knowing my journey... erm could I give less of a damn? No, he's just a shallow being, and I don't care for his opinion.

Take it one step at a time, go back with your friend once or twice a week, then build up to more times, until you're confident enough. You'll probably see those idiots again, lads in a group will say anything to make the others laugh, even if it's at other's expense! So take no notice, I know it's easier said than done, I was in your situation once and I made a big mistake, I let it get to me, I hid in my room, cried and ate and ate, becoming more depressed and more bigger, learn from my mistakes, it's not the way,

Let's draw a line underneath this incident and hope for the best! =)

How are you feeling today? I hope you're better! xx
 
rowanx2 said:
Probably being called fatty, free willy etc etc and such in the street. Made all the worse now I have a child and she's been with me - thank god she's too young to understand
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It's bad enough people say these things to others, but to say it when you are with a young child is shocking, and they can only be trying to compensate for their own sad existence.
 
JLStretton said:
It's bad enough people say these things to others, but to say it when you are with a young child is shocking, and they can only be trying to compensate for their own sad existence.
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I know, its very sad but people just dont care. It has kind of spurred me on to lose this weight though cos the name calling did stop when I lost weight before. I'd also hate my daughter to be bullied for having a fat mammy xx
 
fatty2slim said:
Awww *hugs* I can relate to what you're saying because us humans are our own enemies! We love to slate and curse each other!

Look at it this way, those people who judge us have no idea what we have been through, they have no right to make silly assumptions, therefore their opinions don't matter. If they knew you as a person and based a judgement upon that, it may hurt me a little if they were cruel to me, but for someone to say awful things about me, not knowing my journey... erm could I give less of a damn? No, he's just a shallow being, and I don't care for his opinion.

Take it one step at a time, go back with your friend once or twice a week, then build up to more times, until you're confident enough. You'll probably see those idiots again, lads in a group will say anything to make the others laugh, even if it's at other's expense! So take no notice, I know it's easier said than done, I was in your situation once and I made a big mistake, I let it get to me, I hid in my room, cried and ate and ate, becoming more depressed and more bigger, learn from my mistakes, it's not the way,

Let's draw a line underneath this incident and hope for the best! =)

How are you feeling today? I hope you're better! xx
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Sorry hunni- thought i had replied to this- must have been asleep or something lol

I don't know what's wrong with me to be honest- for years i've let things go, but its since i've lost weight, i'm more self conscious when people do make comments- probably because of the amount of work i've put in to lose the weight so far, ya know?

I'm hoping to go the gym next week (i can't this week :( ) just to get over the fear really.because that's all it is. and as someone said to me once- i've got to have some courage- and courage is feeling the fear and doing it anyway....but it is hard

i'm honestly feeling rather rough- exam stress, and my best friend (who lives in Canada) has recently become a grandma. This friend is like a mum to me- so the lil baby is my "adopted nephew" and i'm really depressed that i wont be able to meet him for a long while :( That and my friend never seems to be online anymore- only to play her facebook games, but never wants to chat....so im feeling lonely

lonely, fat and depressed.....not a great combination

this too shall pass though....i hope so anyways :(
 
The other day me and my husband were walking to our local supermarket and a child in the back of a car who was about 8 I would have said, he only looked small, stuck his head out the window and shouted 'Fatties, Who ate all the pies!!' I couldn't believe it!! I was kind of in shock, then had this overwhelming hope and desire that he becomes overwieght when he's older :s (Is that bad??) lol
He hasn't really effected us at all, I've lost nearly 2 stone and am actually fitting in size 18 clothes right now, so I'm feeling pretty good :D It was just so weird, havn't had anything happen like that to me for years!! :s
 
I tried to stop reading this thread (just found it tonight) because it was making me so upset but i couldn't & now i am boiling over with RAGE!!!
I need to have a great solid come-back comment fixed in my head for these situations - i hate the feeling if you don't say anything to these monsters & then think of a great reply later!
The only one i play in my mind is the classic "i may be fat but at least i can diet - but you will always have an ugly soul!"
Usually far too mortified to say it though :(

The family remarks can't fail to stick in your mind forever - my brother when i was 13 "you'll NEVER get a boyfriend when you're that fat!"
My dad not defending me or saying anything when i was 11 (how cruel?!) And a drunk old guy shouted right in my face "my god you're ugly!"

A group of lads asking our group of girls to go to another club with them but saying "but don't bring the fat pig!"

Shockingly evil comments, it's disgusting that people feel they can say these things! What's wrong with THEM?

*ranty ranty stomp stomp* ;)

CGx

Sent from my HTC Wildfire using MiniMins
 
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