Frances' New House, New Life, New Start Diary...

[emmaedes]

OK non WW / diet related question for my Minimin friends... Have any of you been heavy smokers in the past n given up? If yes, how did you do it?
Jonathan is quite a heavy smoker n after yet another argument over it n him swearing he wants to stop but its too hard.. la la la la.. I've decided to ask people who have been there n done it for tips..
He threw at me that I should try helping him instead of giving out!! Which I resent BIGTIME as short of taking his bankcard n being in his company 24/7 I've done all I can.. I've gotten him tonnes of info, books, hypnosis info, researched for days n days about the tablets ya can get off the doc to make sure there weren't any horrbile side effects etc..
I know its gona be hard for him to do but I really don't think he's ever put 100% into it... N its easier to blame me for him failing!!! Thanks in advance for any tips/advice you might b able give..

When I was 18 I smoked for a year about 20 a day and I just gave up, it was hard but I didn't use anything other than will power......if only I could use the will power for dieting lol!!

My sister has tried the patches tho and they are gd I think! Has he been to docs?! They give alot of support and also patches etc xxx

 

[Dubchick81]

i gave up in 1991 and i used to smoke between 40 and 60 marlboro a day dubs ,but being pregnant with my daughter was my reason.
my other half has been using one of those electronic ciggies recently and he says they are very good,he got his from a place called Totally Wicked.

Thanks Tracy.. Don't think he'll ever have the same incentive as you ha ha..
Have heard those eCigarettes are good alright..

 

[bulldogdaisy]

Wow you look great in your pics Hun :0) gorgeous :0) as to the smoking,my OH has giving up a few times,he has done the patches and saw the quit smoking nurse at the doctors,I know how you feel bout getting the blame,I've had that thrown at me a few times! He hasn't smoked since the end of October last year apart from 4 a couple of months ago when we had a row(my fault of course) and they say they are the stronger sex..Grrr..lol

 

[Dubchick81]

Wow you look great in your pics Hun :0) gorgeous :0) as to the smoking,my OH has giving up a few times,he has done the patches and saw the quit smoking nurse at the doctors,I know how you feel bout getting the blame,I've had that thrown at me a few times! He hasn't smoked since the end of October last year apart from 4 a couple of months ago when we had a row(my fault of course) and they say they are the stronger sex..Grrr..lol

Yea he's done the patches.. The tablets.. And the gum.. But TBH I dunno if he was doing it because he wanted to, or to shut me up moaning about the smell of him. his clothes, his house, his bedroom.... etc etc.. I'm a nightmare anti smoker!! I know I am and I do try to shut up.. But the smell revolts me.. And obviously they killed my Mam so the whole cancer aspect gets me going as well..
I know he needs to it 100% for him.. in order for him to suceed in quiting.. Same with me my dieting.. If I was doing for anyone other than me I'd fail at the first hurdle.. So I do understand.. And I do try to be as supportive as I can be.. But as I said to him last night, there's only a %age I can do.. He has to do the hard bit!!
I know if he stops drinking he'll do better.. But as soon as there's mention of a beer, he gives up trying and goes and buys 20 cigarettes.. won't even TRY to see how he goes without a cigarette when drinking so then he gives up trying to give up.. So unless we vowe to never drink again, it won't work.. Which is stupid!! All the advice says to carry on your normal routine while trying to give up or you make it harder on yerself when you re-introduce the "normal" things.. Ugh.. I dunno.. Here I am tryna get tips for him while no doubt he's still smoking away today as if nothing were said

On another note, thank you very much for your kind words
Took my measurements on Saturday as I mentioned, and here's my update.. First time I took them was Feb 2011, just after I started WW.. So since then I have lost 14inches.... :happy036:
I've lost 3in from my waist. 3in from my hips. 4.5in from my chest (typical.. Can't afford to lose anything there!!!) 2in from my biceps. Gained a half an in on my thighs. N lost 2in from my calf...
Now, don't get me wrong.. I know I should have lost ALLOT more than that in that time frame.. but i'm just happy that I've lost them.. And I won't be praying to St. Anthony to find them again lol

 

[emmaedes]

hey hun,

its hard isnt it! because like you said its like dieting, if someone nags me telling me i need to lose weight im so stubborn that im like no actually i'll do what i like blah blah!! so same with smoking really! maybe play on the health aspect more than the actual smoking if that makes sense?! also have you ordered one of these Smoking? | Advice to help you stop smoking | NHS SmokeFree ??? smoking quit kit? anything could help? xxx

 

[emmaedes]

on that link there's calculator to show how much money he will save and like a quitting timeline etc? xx

 

[Dubchick81]

hey hun,

its hard isnt it! because like you said its like dieting, if someone nags me telling me i need to lose weight im so stubborn that im like no actually i'll do what i like blah blah!! so same with smoking really! maybe play on the health aspect more than the actual smoking if that makes sense?! also have you ordered one of these Smoking? | Advice to help you stop smoking | NHS SmokeFree ??? smoking quit kit? anything could help? xxx

Thanks hun.. Will have a look thru that now.. We have NOTHING from the health service to help you stop.. At at 50e a pop to SEE the doctor, never mind then the price of whatever ya'v to get, its quite expensive..
He went n got those tablets n was doing well one them.. Was not smoking for maybe 2 r 3 months.. But then we went on hols n he decided if i'm drinkin i'm smokin so that was that.. Didn't even try to not smoke.. Soon as we got to Dublin airport he went n bought cigarettes.. But then they cost €50 to see the doc n get the prescription.. And then €90 euro for a months supply.. So he may as well have been spending the money on cigarettes!!! s

 

[Dubchick81]

hey hun,

its hard isnt it! because like you said its like dieting, if someone nags me telling me i need to lose weight im so stubborn that im like no actually i'll do what i like blah blah!! so same with smoking really! maybe play on the health aspect more than the actual smoking if that makes sense?! also have you ordered one of these Smoking? | Advice to help you stop smoking | NHS SmokeFree ??? smoking quit kit? anything could help? xxx

That quit kit looks really helpful.. Unfortunately we don't have a UK address tho
Thanks tho..

 

[emmaedes]

That quit kit looks really helpful.. Unfortunately we don't have a UK address tho
Thanks tho..

o no!!! i didnt realise!! i would be happy to order one and send over to you? xx

 

[Tracy831]

Dubs i didnt realise you paid for healthcare in Ireland ?

 

[bulldogdaisy]

Yea he's done the patches.. The tablets.. And the gum.. But TBH I dunno if he was doing it because he wanted to, or to shut me up moaning about the smell of him. his clothes, his house, his bedroom.... etc etc.. I'm a nightmare anti smoker!! I know I am and I do try to shut up.. But the smell revolts me.. And obviously they killed my Mam so the whole cancer aspect gets me going as well..
I know he needs to it 100% for him.. in order for him to suceed in quiting.. Same with me my dieting.. If I was doing for anyone other than me I'd fail at the first hurdle.. So I do understand.. And I do try to be as supportive as I can be.. But as I said to him last night, there's only a %age I can do.. He has to do the hard bit!!
I know if he stops drinking he'll do better.. But as soon as there's mention of a beer, he gives up trying and goes and buys 20 cigarettes.. won't even TRY to see how he goes without a cigarette when drinking so then he gives up trying to give up.. So unless we vowe to never drink again, it won't work.. Which is stupid!! All the advice says to carry on your normal routine while trying to give up or you make it harder on yerself when you re-introduce the "normal" things.. Ugh.. I dunno.. Here I am tryna get tips for him while no doubt he's still smoking away today as if nothing were said

On another note, thank you very much for your kind words
Took my measurements on Saturday as I mentioned, and here's my update.. First time I took them was Feb 2011, just after I started WW.. So since then I have lost 14inches.... :happy036:
I've lost 3in from my waist. 3in from my hips. 4.5in from my chest (typical.. Can't afford to lose anything there!!!) 2in from my biceps. Gained a half an in on my thighs. N lost 2in from my calf...
Now, don't get me wrong.. I know I should have lost ALLOT more than that in that time frame.. but i'm just happy that I've lost them.. And I won't be praying to St. Anthony to find them again lol

I'd say that was a good amount of inches to lose.Dont be negative bout yourself hun,positive thoughts :0) I'm the same as you with smoking so I know how you feel and Jon is the same if we go out drinking,he fancies smoking.Habits are hard to break and it all boils down to will power! And yea Jonathan needs to want to do it as well.Maybe sit and have a honest chat about it and tell him it's cos you don't want to lose him and as in the long run you guys want a baby a healthy none smoking Dad is the right way to go about it :0)

 

[sarah88]

Well done on the inch loss that's a brill loss seein as u haven't exercised (or have u?) my inch loss only really picked up with the exercise

 

[moonwatcher]

That's a lot of inches! Well done.

 

[Dubchick81]

o no!!! i didnt realise!! i would be happy to order one and send over to you? xx

Aww.. Would you do that hun? That'd be great if you wouldn't mind.. How cud I get the money for postage back to you tho?

Dubs i didnt realise you paid for healthcare in Ireland ?

Oh yea Tracy we're ripped off with our healthcare.. €50 standard charge to SEE the doctor.. Then the cost of precriptions can go up to any amount.. the dearest I've paid was €115 but it'd usually be around mayb 10-15€ for an anti-biotic...
If you have to visit A&E you've to put a down payment of €100 to be seen... We're ripped!!

 

[Dubchick81]

I'd say that was a good amount of inches to lose.Dont be negative bout yourself hun,positive thoughts :0) I'm the same as you with smoking so I know how you feel and Jon is the same if we go out drinking,he fancies smoking.Habits are hard to break and it all boils down to will power! And yea Jonathan needs to want to do it as well.Maybe sit and have a honest chat about it and tell him it's cos you don't want to lose him and as in the long run you guys want a baby a healthy none smoking Dad is the right way to go about it :0)

Thanks chic.. I know its good but it should be better.. If I stuck to it religiously it would be allot more.. but hey-ho..

I have sat down and poured my heart out to him about it hun. Explained I will not bring a baby into a home where he smokes.. Even if he doesn't do it in the house, the chemicals will still be on his skin, his clothes.. And the AWFUL smell will rub onto the baby when he holds it.. YUCK!!
See my Mam was a heavy smoker (60 a day!!) and was diagnosed with cancer.. For years n years n years n years I begged n pleaded n hounded her to give up before she gets cancer.. And she didn't listen.. then she was diagnosed.. And 6 weeks later she died! It had gone right thru her so it was too late to do anything about it.. I have explained to him that that's what he's risking putting his kids thru if he doesn't stop! Thought I'd lay it on the table how angry I was with my Mam when she passed away for doing it to herself.. She knew the risk and done it anyway. And I won't lie.. I blamed her!
I can't be any more honest than that with him so there's not much else I can say...
(Sorry for getting morbid.. Just explaining why I feel so strongly about it)

Well done on the inch loss that's a brill loss seein as u haven't exercised (or have u?) my inch loss only really picked up with the exercise

Thank you And no, little or no exercise.. Like I was in the gym for a few months when I started.. but haven't been for over a year.. So you can say no exercise really

That's a lot of inches! Well done.

Thanks

 

[bulldogdaisy]

Thanks chic.. I know its good but it should be better.. If I stuck to it religiously it would be allot more.. but hey-ho..

I have sat down and poured my heart out to him about it hun. Explained I will not bring a baby into a home where he smokes.. Even if he doesn't do it in the house, the chemicals will still be on his skin, his clothes.. And the AWFUL smell will rub onto the baby when he holds it.. YUCK!!
See my Mam was a heavy smoker (60 a day!!) and was diagnosed with cancer.. For years n years n years n years I begged n pleaded n hounded her to give up before she gets cancer.. And she didn't listen.. then she was diagnosed.. And 6 weeks later she died! It had gone right thru her so it was too late to do anything about it.. I have explained to him that that's what he's risking putting his kids thru if he doesn't stop! Thought I'd lay it on the table how angry I was with my Mam when she passed away for doing it to herself.. She knew the risk and done it anyway. And I won't lie.. I blamed her!
I can't be any more honest than that with him so there's not much else I can say...
(Sorry for getting morbid.. Just explaining why I feel so strongly about it)

least you are doing something with health and food,slow and steady and all that :0) That's a shame that you've already been down that road with Jonathan and things still haven't changed,sounds like he has to wake up and do it for himself.It must get very frustrating for you.It doesn't help that you've been through a bad experience with your Mum doing the same thing,don't apologise Hun,you can say whatever to me :0)

 

[Tracy831]

We are very lucky over here then, can u not get medical insurance like in usa ??
I cant stand the smell of smoke either now, and i make my other half smoke outside, but my mum smokes in every room in her house and even a carrier bag from her house stinks of fags!
When the kids used to go there i would have to bath them after and wash their clothes, but we dont go there anymore as i dont talk to my dad.
But i think its a lot like trying to loose weight, unless you are in the right frame of mind and want to do it for yourself then you just wont do it.
But i do wish you luck though xx

 

[Dubchick81]

least you are doing something with health and food,slow and steady and all that :0) That's a shame that you've already been down that road with Jonathan and things still haven't changed,sounds like he has to wake up and do it for himself.It must get very frustrating for you.It doesn't help that you've been through a bad experience with your Mum doing the same thing,don't apologise Hun,you can say whatever to me :0)

Yea I think he does want to give up.. But just doesn't have the "Ok i'm going to do it" just yet.. he will... Eventually! (hopefully!)

We are very lucky over here then, can u not get medical insurance like in usa ??
I cant stand the smell of smoke either now, and i make my other half smoke outside, but my mum smokes in every room in her house and even a carrier bag from her house stinks of fags!
When the kids used to go there i would have to bath them after and wash their clothes, but we dont go there anymore as i dont talk to my dad.
But i think its a lot like trying to loose weight, unless you are in the right frame of mind and want to do it for yourself then you just wont do it.
But i do wish you luck though xx

Yea he has to want to do it 100% for himself for sure.. Its just frustrating knowing what it can do n the ill health it can cause.. But then, its the same with a weight problem isn't it?! I'm puttin myself up for all sorts of heart n back problems, diabetes etc...
We spoke last week about giving up drink for a while.. Well, I said I was thinking about it and the mentioned he'd been thinking the same.. So maybe I'll bring that up again and set ourselves a target.. I can work on losing more weight and he can work on giving up cigarettes... And we can start bring Stringer our from next week so I'll be doing lotz of walks n jogs in the park with him (when i say jogs I mean just when am playing with him.. not 'oh i'm going for a 5k jog')" so hopefully that'll kick start some losses for me

 

[azwethinkweiz]

Medical insurance is something only rich folk can afford usually... That's how bloody expensive it is. I can't afford it myself, dunno about you Frances?
It's 45EUR in my town for the doc. If you're on drugs payment scheme (which everyone usually is) then the max you pay per month for medication is EUR132ish. I pay this every month for mine... If I had pay full price it'd cost a lot more

Usa is worse for healthcare, they're absolutely robbed over there. We do get some services for free.

I think Jono needs to try a bit harder to really really quit for good (and convince himself it is for good). I used to smoke in college and gave up cold turkey. It's hard but doable. I actually find dieting a lot harder because we HAVE to eat to live whereas ya can just avoid ciggies altogether. Awful situation to be in hon. My granda died from cigarettes too, he had to go around with an oxygen tank and tubes up his nose for the last years of his life.
My boss from when I was 13-19 died from cigarettes too. I won't touch them now but both my sisters still smoke *sigh*

Sent from my Galaxy S using MiniMins

 

[bulldogdaisy]

Yea I think he does want to give up.. But just doesn't have the "Ok i'm going to do it" just yet.. he will... Eventually! (hopefully!)

Yea he has to want to do it 100% for himself for sure.. Its just frustrating knowing what it can do n the ill health it can cause.. But then, its the same with a weight problem isn't it?! I'm puttin myself up for all sorts of heart n back problems, diabetes etc...
We spoke last week about giving up drink for a while.. Well, I said I was thinking about it and the mentioned he'd been thinking the same.. So maybe I'll bring that up again and set ourselves a target.. I can work on losing more weight and he can work on giving up cigarettes... And we can start bring Stringer our from next week so I'll be doing lotz of walks n jogs in the park with him (when i say jogs I mean just when am playing with him.. not 'oh i'm going for a 5k jog')" so hopefully that'll kick start some losses for me

Aw am sure he will get there,how about the money you guys will save from not drinking,no smoking,no food treats,you put in a pot and save towards a holiday?