Help....... Please...:-(
- Thread starter sigourney
- Start date
Dahlia Rose
Silver Member
Hey sigourney sorry to hear your hAving man trouble it's never a good time for that but I hope you are okay love x
Dahlia Rose
Silver Member
Nik delighted the jeans are nearly fitting you'll be foxy in no time!!!
Dahlia Rose
Silver Member
i bought myself a new pair of heels for being back on here (well my bf bought them) now i just have to practice walking without killing myself
Nikkiola said:
Thankyou... Although it's not about missing... It's about knowing the old ways are returning and that was a horrible existence... And I won't allow myself to become a wreck again... What to do..! That's my issue... Sit back and wait for it to happen and prolong the agony for everyone or sort it now.... Either way I am left feeling destroyed internally and mistrusting ... It's complicated it's not easy.... Still no appetite just done massive workout... But I can feel my mood slipping already... It's nice to talk thankyou... And sorry for offloading x
Dahlia Rose
Silver Member
Sweetheart never apologise to us for unloading! It's what we do think of it as group theraphy! I understand that feeling you have inside you it's horrible it hurts worse than breaking all your bones at once! It makes you so weak and you are so emotionally drained you can't even cry any more! Honey I was there but it doesn't have to be like that! Sort things out for yourself! Do what is right for you! Take care of you for once! I hope things work out for you if he is who you want to be with make him see you are worth every tear if he's not who you want then he's not worth any of those tears not a single drop x
We have been together nearly 5 years when our boy was 6 months he left ..... And never saw him for 9 months... Was an awful time but I became me again and not the wreck I became whilst he was always working and I was always waiting....he never supported my son never even acknowledged his first birthday... We got back together .. I know silly maybe but god I missed feeling loved... Had to give up my degree whilst pregnant and I had longed for it for so long and was so proud of myself.... I never wanted anymore kids I have two older ones... But I wanted his does that make any sense..? Anyway my world was smashed when he left.. Since we made a fresh start he has not worked ... Been poorly with back problems... Its been a roller coaster ... Great to have that security and love and to see him being there for us... But hard spending so much time together.... Neither of us have a family ....:-(.... Anyway recently he has been organising meeting etc without asking me and is considering working out of our area again... It's just refuelled my insecurities and made me feel like I felt before... Why ... Why would you knowing your first marriage was destroyed because of it.. Then it killed us... Why it's so selfish... Some days he does not leave the bedroom depressed or lethargic and I care for him... Yet today he can get up get dressed put on a suit and drive for 2 hours... Leaving the house a mess like it's my job.....I went to the gym as I always do... Could not bare it... Left him in bed and was gone when i got home...and it is my home thank god.... Only rented but still mine and secure for as long as i want it to be ...Then to top it all picked my little star up from the nursery... Got home and he was mortified that dada was not there to hear about his day... Killed me inside....I'm at such a low ebb I feel so angry at myself for letting him into our hearts again.... The trouble that came to my door when he left sapped all my savings...:-(...... He blames me for making him unhappy says I sap his energy.... On lots and lots of drugs for his back... Just don't know what to do.... He keeps saying will leave if I don't get off his case...... I don't consider myself to be beautiful but I'm told I am....and believe me he is less than perfect...... Sometimes the names he calls me are disgusting.....times like this I wish my mum were alive... I'm here for my kids... Who is here for me.... I can't live with someone who puts home as second best and chooses travelling over time with us.... Why should I.... I just dont know what to do anymore... Since he mentioned it I have shut off and have no desire to be close to him... Because I feel betrayed... Talking does not work because he is always right in his mind :-( xx
((((hugs)))))) sigourney, you sound like you need them.
poor you, i think you need to think about you and your little one right now, he sounds like he is selfish and doesnt take your feelings into condsideration..... its easier for me to say this but so very very true, you certainly deserve to be treated better than this xxxx
poor you, i think you need to think about you and your little one right now, he sounds like he is selfish and doesnt take your feelings into condsideration..... its easier for me to say this but so very very true, you certainly deserve to be treated better than this xxxx
Dahlia Rose
Silver Member
im so sorry to hear what a rough situation you are in (its me vanilly i changed my name!) anyway honestly you need to let him go! you cant stay with him just for the sake of someone loving you! loads of people will love you but you need to stand strong! trust me i know your kid would never want you to stay with him and be miserable! do this for yourself
mummyof1 said:
I know....... I'm waiting for the vile texts to start..... The accept it or don't rubbish... He can't even bath his son but he can do this meeting ..... Sitting here now can't eat feel so churned up... Never ate yesterday not eaten today.... Feel so empty.....I gave up everything for him ... X
I'm miserable thinking that when he is working I don't matter... We don't matter... He used to have texts from women clients all the time... Talk to them online... I mean he put me on the floor.... I can't let that happen again....why cant he be happy he was damn lucky to get another chance with us.... He has no home no savings.... He had nothing but a few bags when he came back... I'm not saying he is not good to us he is ... But money is not everything in this life is it.. Nothing compares to having someone to share your life with x
Nikkiola
Full Member
Dont worry one bit about offloading, thats why we're all on here, to get the support we need to get through out hard times from people who are understanding. Talking about your problems is one of the best ways to get them in perspective and make a plan for yourself and I doubt anyone on here minds giving you an ear if it helps you.
I for one am really sorry to hear the way you're being treated. You dont deserve that at all and neither does your little lad! You're obviously so brave to be putting up with this for so long but you have to start thinking about whats best for you. I know you said you have no family around but are there any support groups where you live or anywhere you can get some extra help/advice?
xxx Nikki
Nikkiola
Full Member
Cham Pers
size 8 by July
Oh i feel for you. Here i am sitting here with my happy family and worrying about the stupid little things and theres you, trying to be brave and strong for your child. You are an amazing person you have done everything humanely possible to give your child a Daddy and if it doesnt work out you are NOT a failure. You deserve love, friendship, companionship and trust. Seems like you dont get all of them like you should. I have been where you are about 16 years ago and the best thing i ever did (even though it didnt feel like it at the time) was to leave him. 14 years ago (2years later) i met and married a wonderful man who became my little boys daddy and still is hes 19 now. We then went on to have a daughter of our own. I remember feeling like my world had crumbled and felt only despair. But you get through it for your child. Whatever decision you make is what YOU feel is best. It will getter better. If you want change then its down to you to do the changing. Be strong lots of love, hugs and support from all us here xxxxxxc
