Kez's struggles and troubles! 17th June Restart!

Hey, welcome to Minis Kay, don't worry, it took me ages to work out how to do things on here. It takes a while to build up priviledges to let you put things in your signiture, you need at least 50 posts.

But you can put a photo on, I'll try and go through it to save you having to hunt through all the posts in the Technical Help section.

First click on User CP on the blue section at the top.
Then click on Edit Avatar in the left hand column
A new box comes up, make sure that Use Custom Avatar is selected
Now chose Option 2 by clicking on Browse
This lets you choose a photo from your computer.
Once you've found the photo you want double click on it's thumbnail
Then click on Save Changes
Then your pic should appear when you post.

I hope this helps, I've been caught out a couple of times with changing my pic and then not clicking on Save Changes.

How's today been Kez? I've had a fab day with my Mum, just went shopping, didn't really buy anything but saw a shoplifter in M&S of all places. She looked like a well to do type woman, in her 60's, but she put 2 t-shirts into her rather large hand bag and legged it out of the shop, me and Mum just stood there with our mouths open....
 
Evening ladies! Welcome Kay, I don't mind you being on here one little bit. When is your first weigh in? Well done on tackling CD, it's sooooo hard, but also very, very rewarding!

Hey Lorna, well I was a bad girl, cause I didn't go to weigh in. But I was a good girl and instead I took the doggies up the aerodrome which I think is about 3 miles?! It killed my back to begin with, almost in tears, but by the end of it my back and hip has loosen up lots. So hoping it was a good idea! How you enjoying your couple of days off. Chilled out a bit yet?

Nikki, I can't wait until I am at your stage. But it must be so frustrating trying to banish those last few niggly lbs when you've come so far. How are you teeth now? Are the AB's fixing things? I did laugh when you said about the Tramadol, I've taken one to many of them before. It was a bit like an out of body experience..lol!

Well, I'm feeling pretty glutonnous. I have been bad in my choices, but have been doing my usual eating too much. The quality part is fine, it always has been. It's the quantity part that I struggle with.

I still feel like my battle with CD isn't up yet? I feel like I want to tackle it again and beat it. Almost like I need to prove this to myself after so many failed attempts. But inside I guess I know, it's only my pride kicking off. Deep down, I know I can't do it.

If I do try it again, I think I will do it in secret. That way if I crash and burn, noone needs to know! lol
 
Hmmmm. Well i dont have a 'Use own avatar' button. Maybe i have to work for that too. :confused:
Hellooo Kez, my first weigh in is next tuesday, this weekend will be boring with no alcohol, i asked my CDC if i could have any alcohol at all (me being amateur i asked this, you will probably all laugh :)) and she said...''you can treat yourself to a sparkling water with a slice of lemon'' WOW. Since when was that a treat...

I think im gonna find it hard because i see my dad every other weekend, and he always takes me and my sister to Nando's. I cant just sit there with a glass of water...and he will probably think my CD diet is silly (you know what dads are like) so do you think it would be bad if i had a salad - lettuce leaves and a chicken breast - but with no sauces of any kind? Would that sort of be like the SS+?
 
Kay I think it's yet another thing you need to have so many posts for. You can play the word games that are scattered about the place to increase your number of posts so you can get priviledges. I think they do this to stop people from creating huge profiles then disappearing after a few days. It doesn't take long to build up your posts.

Well done Kez for that walk, I hope you don't suffer for it tomorrow. I wouldn't worry about not going to WI, and as for tackling CD again, you need to do whats right for you at the time, it doesn't matter what other people think about it. I've kinda learned over the time that people might judge, but the people who really matter will support you no matter what.

I'm loving being off, it's been so nice to finally catch up with my best mate, we hardly ever see each other even though we only live 5 minutes away from each other. My goddaughter was creating merry hell, but who can blame her, she's covered in chickenpox spots bless her. But it was just nice to see them all. I wish I didn't have to go back to work on Friday, but it's only for one day and I'm sure I can manage to tune out all of the BS that's going on there at the moment.

Tomorrow.....I've got absolutely nothing to do.........wonderful!!!!!
 
hi kez, its been quiet without you. you do what is right for you, and if you crash on burn on cd then we'll be here to help you up again.

dont be embarrased about starting again, believe me there are a lot of people on here who crash and burn on a daily basis. dont always be so tough on yourself!
 
Ah you guys! You always make me smile :)

SALLY...I need to apologise for calling you Lorna. It's cause my mate is called orna and you kind of remind me of her. You should have said something! I feel like a right wally.....
 
Hi Kez

Hope you have a good day hun. xx
 
hi kez! im back with my head hanging low :( have had a whole week off plan but am now back and feeling ok, hows you hun?
 
Ha ha very public apology accepted you dizzy tart lol. I didn't correct you cos I didn't really notice lol you can't have been doing it much...

I've had a fab day today, but now I'm a bit on the pink side. It was a bit cloudy but warm this morning so I went out to do the garden and sat out for a bit, but I've burnt my knees. The rest of my legs are WHITE and my kness are red, it's so attractive lol. I haven't been hungry at all and I haven't thought about food at all, yay, progress!!

Hope you've had a good day.x
 
Haha, phew! Was laid in bed last night dozing off and suddenly clicked.

Glad to hear you had a lovely day! I haven't done anything with my garden for weeks, the nettles have taken over. It's been 22 degrees here, but grey and overcast and muggy. I hate it when it's like that, if it's gonne be hot and sticky it could at least be sunny!

Went round the aerodrome again this evening. I'm sure it helped my back, had the best nights kip I've had in weeks and weeks last night. Only problem is, now my ankles are killing! I walk on the outside edges of my feet and have seriously raised arches and am meant to wear my expensive trainers which encourage me to drop my arches, but I've been wearing my cheap nasty ones. My own fault really, but hey if muscle ache it means they've worked right?! My neighbours dog has started chasing cars and this evening belted off after the jet plane that was screaming down the runway to take off. Scared the life out of me and the neighbour and the pilot as well I'm sure. This is the first collie the neighbour has had and it was a rescue, they've had some issues to work through (the dog turned on us both and bit my neighbour, he's lucky to still have a home). I've always had collies and mine are like little regiment troppers! :) So I'm going to try and do some work with his dog, without getting bitten that is! The neighbours a complete push over and the dogs love him, but don't respect him.

I sound like a heartless cow don't I?! lol. But think about it, if my dogs were running at a jet plane and I shouted down at them, they'd hit the deck instantly. It's a safety thing as much as anything, like a kid running out in the road.

Got the farrier coming tomorrow and that's going to be hard work. My youngster is going to have to have his back feet trimmed and tidied up for the first time and his and my farrier clash to say the least. I'm sure there is going to be plenty of cursing! Neither of them have much patience.

Must go to bed, feeling shattered. Must be all this walking and fresh air!
 
Evening all, well had a really lovely day today. Hectic but lovely all the same. Had the day off work, so started off with a lie in. Got up about half 8 and cleaned my car out. Then had to pop into work (even though I was meant to have the day off), sorted some stuff out and then while I was there my wedding dress finally arrived...yay! It's beautiful.

Then I went to a carpet warehouse to see if they had any lino off cuts to do my front porch where the dogs sleep. But there was nothing that caught my eye and they weren't as cheap as I had hoped they would be. Would be cheaper to put laminate down, seems like slowly the whole house is being replaced with laminate. Still, it's nice and easy to keep clean.

So then I went on to the horses. It's been scorching down here today, it was still 22 degrees when I got home at 5...lush! Got a bit burnt mind, oops! I thought I'd make the most of the weather and bathed Caleb (my horse). He came up sparkling and then I trimmed up all his whiskers and feathers. He looked like he was ready to go to a show. The farrier came up and he managed to clip Calebs back feet. He's only a baby and we've been trying to do it for the last year, but he hasn't been keen and the farrier kept getting kicked...whoops! But today was a complete success. He was a star!

Turned the horses back out and me and my mate laid in the sun in the field with the horses grazing around us. Could of stayed there for hours, so relaxing.

Went home, waited for the weather to cool down and then took the dogs up the aerodrome for their walk. It was beautiful up there, lovely cool breeze coming off the sea. There are loads of sea flowers coming up, I am wondering if I dig some up, whether they will fill out my rockaries?

Meant to be working tomorrow, going to be a crazy day. Got 28 chalets to clean as prepping up for the bank holiday weekend. I really can't be bothered to go! I know that is so so lazy, but the weather is so nice and I've got Monday off as well and I just want to enjoy my long weekend. Also, my back is still giving me jip and the walk with the dogs the last 3 days has def helped it loosen up, but I know that spending 9 hours tomorrow on my hands and knees scrubbing is going to throw it out again. I've messaged one of the girls and asked if there are enough covers in tomorrow to cope if I don't go in. I feel bad for letting the others girls down, but by putting myself first I'm going to feel a lot better for it!

I haven't made any comment on my diet for a while. I'm not really following any plan to be honest. I exchanged some insightful messages with dappymare and realised that CD was screwing with my head. It's an amazing diet, but I think that as well as needing to be in the right frame of mind to diet all together, you need to be in a completely special place to do CD and for it to be a positive thing. I don't think I was in that place, so I ended up beating myself down and feeling very low and confused most of the time. So I have put CD behind me and managed to drop the notion that I am going to be able to beat CD, it just isn't going to happen and all the time I am trying to prep myself up for it, I am just beating myself up over it.

Soooo, diet wise for the rest of this week at least, I am just not going to do anything. I am going to eat what I want, because to be honest I am remembering that if I can have it, then I tend not to.

Anyway, I am rambling! And I've lost my train of thought, so I am going to sign out! haha :)
 
Hey Hun did you manage to get out of cleaning the chalets today? It's been such a gorgeous day today, I haven't done a thing except lay in the sun! It's been good with the heat making me drink more and I really enjoyed my shakes made with lots of ice. Last time I did CD it was the summertime and I found it so much easier, I think this diet is definitely a summer diet!

Tomorrow I'm going to the Market with my mum where every other stall is a food stall, we're going early to avoid the crowds so hopefully I'll be able to resist the bacon sandwiches!!! Because Im feeling fat again all of a sudden, I've gone for weeks feeling thinner than the numbers on the scales say, but now I feel fat :-( I daren't even go on the scales to see. I blame the fact that I went out for a family meal to pizza hut last night and couldn't bring myself to have a salad when everyone else was having pizza. Ah well never mind what's done is done!! I'll have to brave the scales in the morning because if I don't I KNOW the bacon sandwich will win!!!

Urgh sorry just realised I've been moaning on, just ignor me I'm in one of those moods tonight :-/ AnywY hope you've had a good day xx
 
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ur right for letting CD go for the moment if it is messing with ur head!! u dont need that, just relax into a good way of eating and telling urself nothing is off limits does trick the mind into not thinking about it!!!

hope ur back feels better soon, the dog walks sound fun and relaxing, i used to have horses and miss it like crazy, the relaxing in the field with them in their environment is special, i spent hours just watching our youngsters play!!
 
Hey girls, thanks for coming and posting Sally, I'm just pacing about trying to waste time till I'm tired enough to go to bed. I'm so pathetic at being alone. We barely see each other at weekends and that's fine, but it's when I go to bed I don't like being in the house alone. The dogs will be sleeping up with me tonight! lol

Think I'm feeling crappy anyway as just come on, didn't realise I was due but I guess that explains the bloated, sluggish feeling I've had all day. I just put it down to being tired and it being hot.

I've been retaining water like crazy the last couple of days. My rings have been so tight they've been hurting and my feet and ankles have felt like footballs. No idea what that's about, not drinking enough I guess?

I didn't go into work, I bailed. So glad I did, I don't think I could have coped with it today. It would have finished me off! I don't want to go back at all, but I need the money :(

I tried my wedding dress on today, have got no idea what size it is as it's all written in chinese?! It def doesnt fit. I managed to get it over my head, but it is about 12 inches off doing up around my bust and back, so some serious work needs to be done to get into it! The shawl fits at least! :)

I think when Scott gets back from Manchester we are going to get a joint membership to the gym. I really hate the gym that Scott likes, all mirrors and skinny woman in posh sports clothes. But hey, needs must eh?

MissHJ, I love being up with the horses, I can lose hours just watching them. Some of the others women take the mic, but I don't care. My horse does anything for me cause we have a bond, not cause he is told to, like theirs.

Sally, don't blame you for pizza hut, it sucks when everyone else is gorging and you can't. But you only had half a pizza, so it was still damage limitation!
 
u sound similar to me, my last horse cleo i had from a 2 year old, a hackney x irish draught she was in a bad way wen i got her, rain scould and untouched, she was so trusting and loving tho!! i broke her in myself and she is my baby!! shes 10 now!! my best mate has her as a few years ago i just didnt have the time for her, she is so loving and loves bin ridden etc, she still winnies to me wen i go to c her!! we have the agreement if she ever wants to sell her il have her back so i know she wont go anywhere else!! i miss it so much atm!! once iv lost a few more stones i might try and get bk involved with riding, cleo is too far from me to be able to share her, 45 min drive so will look locally!

how old is urs?
 
hi kez, sounds like you are on your way to getting your head sorted, and sounds like you are enjoying being totally free of dieting.

sally - i am so near goal but feel fatter in the 10 stone bracket than i did when i started CD. dont know what the hell is wrong with me but i simply cannot see that i have lost weight!
 
Well I've taken the plunge and been on the scales, I'm only up by 1lb so it really is all in my head, there's no way 1lb can make that much difference lol. I've come to the conclusion that it's because it's so hot and the thought of wearing a vest top in public is making me feel like Nelly the Elephant. I don't think I'll ever be satisfied.
 
I've had a lovely weekend. Very sad it's Sunday night :0(
Had 2 birthdays today so been busy visiting. One party was at pizza hut...but I was very proud I resisted temptation of pizza and had chicken wings and salad. I even gave 2 chicken wings away, I junk I may be learning, or I hope I am.
But I did have diet coke while I was there(naughty I know) but water was twice the price.

Also today I have had
*chocolate shake
*1/2 peanut bar
*strawberry mousse

Off to bed soon as I have a horrid day at work tomorrow 8am - 7pm and have got a big show going on.
 
Haha, not to worry! The more the merrier. x
 
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