Minerva's on a mission!!

[Minerva]

I know you find compliments hard but I just wanted to echo what everyone else has been saying - you're fab! You always come across as very kind, balanced, genuine, mature, articulate and intelligent. I've no doubt you're gonna kick ass at college! The time WILL fly - it always did for me in Uni xxx think of the amazing summer you will have!!! I really admire your study dedication btw! Be sure to plan lil treats to reward all your hard work xxx

Oh shush lovely lady.. You're all making me blush!! Arggh.
I can't wait for the summer, I will be done with all of this Uni stuff and hopefully by then I'll be entering the 11st bracket at which point I do start to feel better about myself as well!!
I'm no good at planning treats though, I don't see point in rewarding myself for stuff I HAVE to do anyway I do what needs to be done - end of!

Thank you for your support though :hug99: it means a lot. Do you have any plans for this week coming up? x

 

[Minerva]

You're doing so well to balance everything. And that thing you said about fog-brain...you know, the day before i had my scary episode..I couldnt think straight. I just put it down to being tired or left over baby-brain, but looking back I think it WAS what you said...my body slipped into starvation mode! Eeek! Oh well...onward now. You're going to do so well. So much discipline and dedication to your studies...you cant NOT do well. xx

Fog-brain is a funny thing... I had it for so long when I was doing VLCD last time, it was ... not pleasant. I became obsessed with the diet, and every day was a daze and a struggle to get through, and I persevered longer than I should have done. I saw quite a lot of my muscle tone waste away, my heart hurt... I felt very weak by the end. Couldn't think straight, I was severely depressed for months. That's no good!! I'm not going to do a repeat of that again!! First sign of fog-brain and out comes some extra food!! Health, happiness and having enough energy for the people I love, to smile and to do the things I want to do are MORE important than being thin! I'm doing what I can to diet efficiently, but I'll do it at my own pace this time. I guess, we live and we learn.
I'm glad you took a step towards health - it's the most important thing. There are a million diets under the sun and not everything works for everyone! Keep us updated with your Slimfast adventures!! I remember my stepmum tried giving me Slimfast when I was about 14 (as I was about a size 18/20 by then) without explaining how it worked to me. Lol. I just drank them without understanding the mechanics - OOPS!

As for my studies, we'll see I'll remain quietly optimistic for that pass. Thank you for your kind words. x

 

[Minerva]

Good Evening Minerva!

Compliments where compliments are due - I don't hand them out to just anyone, so accept with grace, lol!!

Looking forward to hearing your results - be sure to post asap!

I did the same today, had over 900 cals - did it on purpose for the same reason as you. We'll see on Tuesday!

The thing with a VLCD, it can really mess with TOTM, so it may be due now but it may be late - you've been on this a while, have you noticed it's messed with your you-know-what? (that's me being polite, ha!).

You're doing amazingly well to do this and work so hard with your studies too! I am certain in will pay off - you don't seem like the kind of person who accepts anything less than 100% from yourself.

Hope today's been a good one for you!

:bighug:

Thank you Nat, you're such an inspirational person - your optimism is catchy!! Like a plague!!

Well.. er.. with regards to TOTM - my system's messed up ever since I did VLCD the first time. Including the time I was on the diet, I sat at having about 600 calories for over 2 years which shut down the reproductive system. Periods stopped completely and the womb/estrogen levels decreased to levels of someone who is 80 years old. ... The doctor was quite surprised - without the pill to regulate the estrogen levels FOR me - TOTM doesn't come... and annoyingly I've run out and no time to go to the doctor's to get more.
The you-know-what - did you mean doing the beast with two backs or? Lol. I wish people would just say the crude things - it's all natural!! Lol, people in the UK are way too polite!!

Hope tomorrow brings you a great week ahead. How's Max doing? Did you manage schedule another day out while the OH sacrifices his precious golf for you?

 

[NatM70]

Morning Lovely!

Haha! Thank you! Never been likened to the Plague though, hehe!! Made me laugh!

Blimey, you did push yourself too far on this! No way could I do this for two years, and I can't imagine it's good for you. Will your periods ever return to normal? I hope it's not b*ggered up your system for good

Ah yes, us Brits USED to be very 'stiff upper lip' n all that. We (some of us) seem to have let standards drop quite a lot - good in some ways, bad in many others!
I love the elegance of the 1920's-1950's, but wouldn't like to live in any of those era's where a woman's place was definitely in the home, lol!!

WI tomo - I FEEL slimmer, my size 12 jeans are now lose on me (though I still have the dreaded Muffin Top - from pregnancy I hope!), though I don't think I'll have lost much this week - just a feeling.
I'll be doing this diet for 5 more weeks, then a refeed before Max's 1st Birthday and our friend's wedding. If I need to lose more after that (which I think I will as I can't see me getting to 10st before then!), I'll just continue until I do, then embark on a healthy diet & exercise plan - am really missing Zumba!

Max is good thanks, though being naughty with his milk, arrgghhh! Oh well, he's nearly one, so we can really lower his milk intake soon anyway.

Asked hubby last night when we're taking Max swimming this week, and he replied, 'It all depends on work.' - Of course my reply was, 'If you can find time for golf, you can find time to go with your Son swimming.' - He immediately got on to the website to check times, and we're going on Wednesday, haha! He knows by now that if he wants to play golf, he has to keep me happy, ha!
I've got a few appointments this week, so won't be having a 'me' day, but will do next week for def!
Really wanted to see some friends tomo, but just got too much on

Hope you've got some nice things planned? xxx

 

[beelishy]

And how is the lovely (Yes, i said LOVELY) Minerva today? have a great day, honey! xx

 

[slim_and_happy]

Hello there.
Newbie here :flirt2:
I just stumbled across this site while doing my research into slim and save and I've got a feeling this will be my saving grace. I've glanced through your diary but I need to read through it properly later. You and I have a lot in common. I too did LL before and lost a lot of weight. The. Life took over and the weight crept back on.
I am still a big advocate for vlcd's as I know how amazingly effective they can be. Sadly I can't afford LL anymore and S&S seems to be a good alternative.
Im starting today then with roughly 20-25 kg to lose.
I will be following your journey very closely. Your posts are honest raw and so so inspiring.

 

[Minerva]

And how is the lovely (Yes, i said LOVELY) Minerva today? have a great day, honey! xx

Hi Bee I'm ok thank you! Today looks really gloomy outside - just have some lectures to go to ... The last lectures of the year! Then I have 7 weeks to study before exams start. Eeeeeeeeek!!
How are you doing? I read you're a busy bee this week - hopefully nothing is going on that's too stressful!
x

Hello there.
Newbie here :flirt2:
I just stumbled across this site while doing my research into slim and save and I've got a feeling this will be my saving grace. I've glanced through your diary but I need to read through it properly later. You and I have a lot in common. I too did LL before and lost a lot of weight. The. Life took over and the weight crept back on.
I am still a big advocate for vlcd's as I know how amazingly effective they can be. Sadly I can't afford LL anymore and S&S seems to be a good alternative.
Im starting today then with roughly 20-25 kg to lose.
I will be following your journey very closely. Your posts are honest raw and so so inspiring.

Welcome slim_and_happy
This site is indeed wonderful - I had a lot of support when I was finishing off my VLCD in 2009 (the diary for that no longer exists).. This diary starts with my failed attempts in 2011 when my head was in a really wrong place - so it doesn't make good reading material ... But I've come back in January this year, my head is clear and I'm feeling very positive in myself, overcome some issues and it's easy again! Regaining isn't a problem, it's a downer, but nothing that can't be fixed. Main thing is, not to look at it like something to be punished for. That's probably why I failed in 2011 - I was looking at my gain like a massive failure and everything seemed to revolve around it... crooked thinking right there - it was bound to go wrong from the beginning!

So in short, WELCOME! The SnS community is really wonderful here - you'll get those 20-25 kg off in no time! I switched to SnS for cost reasons, but also found that I don't need counselling sessions or someone to 'check' me every week anymore. I have a sense of my own control back, don't need someone to look over my shoulder! And that is pretty liberating!

x

 

[slim_and_happy]

So in short, WELCOME! The SnS community is really wonderful here - you'll get those 20-25 kg off in no time! I switched to SnS for cost reasons, but also found that I don't need counselling sessions or someone to 'check' me every week anymore. I have a sense of my own control back, don't need someone to look over my shoulder! And that is pretty liberating!

x

Yes! That's what I'd like to think. To be honest the reason why I did so well when I did LL was because I wanted to make it work. I found the meetings less useful than I thought. Quite often I was the only one who wanted to stay on for the meeting after the weigh in. The counsellor was very overweight herself and failed to lose any weight during the 3 months I was there and to be honest I found it a touch hypocritical to say the least.
Losing weight is all about mind over matter anyway. I just hope I somehow manage to figure out why on earth do I find it so impossible to keep the weight off. Why do I overcompensate for every bad experience with food. Looking at it now, it sounds ridiculous but why did I ever think that food is my only friend..

 

[Minerva]

Morning Lovely!

Haha! Thank you! Never been likened to the Plague though, hehe!! Made me laugh!

Blimey, you did push yourself too far on this! No way could I do this for two years, and I can't imagine it's good for you. Will your periods ever return to normal? I hope it's not b*ggered up your system for good

Ah yes, us Brits USED to be very 'stiff upper lip' n all that. We (some of us) seem to have let standards drop quite a lot - good in some ways, bad in many others!
I love the elegance of the 1920's-1950's, but wouldn't like to live in any of those era's where a woman's place was definitely in the home, lol!!

WI tomo - I FEEL slimmer, my size 12 jeans are now lose on me (though I still have the dreaded Muffin Top - from pregnancy I hope!), though I don't think I'll have lost much this week - just a feeling.
I'll be doing this diet for 5 more weeks, then a refeed before Max's 1st Birthday and our friend's wedding. If I need to lose more after that (which I think I will as I can't see me getting to 10st before then!), I'll just continue until I do, then embark on a healthy diet & exercise plan - am really missing Zumba!

Max is good thanks, though being naughty with his milk, arrgghhh! Oh well, he's nearly one, so we can really lower his milk intake soon anyway.

Asked hubby last night when we're taking Max swimming this week, and he replied, 'It all depends on work.' - Of course my reply was, 'If you can find time for golf, you can find time to go with your Son swimming.' - He immediately got on to the website to check times, and we're going on Wednesday, haha! He knows by now that if he wants to play golf, he has to keep me happy, ha!
I've got a few appointments this week, so won't be having a 'me' day, but will do next week for def!
Really wanted to see some friends tomo, but just got too much on

Hope you've got some nice things planned? xxx

Lol I wasn't likening you to a Plague, per se, just your positivity. It's very catchy (and that's a good thing)!! Do excuse my colourful language, I tend to hang out with computer geeks which probably influences it!

I hope I haven't messed my system - but the doctor wasn't too worried, she said if I stay on the pill and let it regulate things, then it should be ok. If I wanted to become pregnant, I'd have to come back and then talk about my options. That worries me... I hope I can still have children as I would like some soon...

I think 5 more weeks is plenty, you'll be very very close to your goal - even after the re-feed, you'll probably find that you can lose the last few lbs through some light calorie counting and exercise =) probably no need to put your system through the shock of VLCD for a few lbs! So it makes sense to go back to Zumba sooner rather than later!

I hope you had a lovely session at the swimming pool! And I also really hope you get some 'you - time' next week! You deserve it!
x

 

[Minerva]

Yes! That's what I'd like to think. To be honest the reason why I did so well when I did LL was because I wanted to make it work. I found the meetings less useful than I thought. Quite often I was the only one who wanted to stay on for the meeting after the weigh in. The counsellor was very overweight herself and failed to lose any weight during the 3 months I was there and to be honest I found it a touch hypocritical to say the least.
Losing weight is all about mind over matter anyway. I just hope I somehow manage to figure out why on earth do I find it so impossible to keep the weight off. Why do I overcompensate for every bad experience with food. Looking at it now, it sounds ridiculous but why did I ever think that food is my only friend..

I did find some counselling sessions useful when I was doing this in 2008, I was very overweight, very depressed and only 22 - so what did I know about dieting! Hardly anything at all! Lol, I learned a lot, learned how to recognise emotional eating and my behaviours. But now that I know this, there's no need for counselling. I know what I do - even when it's self-destructive.

As for counsellor being overweight, it's pretty bad to judge them. They are their own people with their own problems and their own lives. They can still help others even if they can't help themselves - it's the same as us, some of us can do it on our own, some of us can't. My counsellor gained some weight while I was with her, but it didn't diminish what she was teaching us - she knew what made us tick because she, herself is part of it. My OH had a horrid counsellor who'd never been overweight, never had any kind of eating issues - and that is A LOT worse. She did not know what she was talking about!!

Plus, maybe the lady was happy being overweight, there are people who love being big! Maybe it's her ideal weight, who knows?

I think, in all honesty, it's a little hypocritical to judge someone for the way they look when we feel so very vulnerable over our own appearances. Hmm? It's not a dig at you, as I do understand that a lot of people feel discouraged being counselled by someone who seemingly can't control themselves, but, it's all a personal journey. We can always see better and are able to advise better when we can look objectively at others, it is harder to teach ourselves because we do not have the same respect for our own being. Remember one of the exercises: "Would you talk to your best friend the way you talk to yourself?" - I think you'll find... no!

 

[slim_and_happy]

I did find some counselling sessions useful when I was doing this in 2008, I was very overweight, very depressed and only 22 - so what did I know about dieting! Hardly anything at all! Lol, I learned a lot, learned how to recognise emotional eating and my behaviours. But now that I know this, there's no need for counselling. I know what I do - even when it's self-destructive.

As for counsellor being overweight, it's pretty bad to judge them. They are their own people with their own problems and their own lives. They can still help others even if they can't help themselves - it's the same as us, some of us can do it on our own, some of us can't. My counsellor gained some weight while I was with her, but it didn't diminish what she was teaching us - she knew what made us tick because she, herself is part of it. My OH had a horrid counsellor who'd never been overweight, never had any kind of eating issues - and that is A LOT worse. She did not know what she was talking about!!

Plus, maybe the lady was happy being overweight, there are people who love being big! Maybe it's her ideal weight, who knows?

I think, in all honesty, it's a little hypocritical to judge someone for the way they look when we feel so very vulnerable over our own appearances. Hmm? It's not a dig at you, as I do understand that a lot of people feel discouraged being counselled by someone who seemingly can't control themselves, but, it's all a personal journey. We can always see better and are able to advise better when we can look objectively at others, it is harder to teach ourselves because we do not have the same respect for our own being. Remember one of the exercises: "Would you talk to your best friend the way you talk to yourself?" - I think you'll find... no!

Hun at no point was I judging or critisising my counsellor. So before you start passing judgement on me I'd try and understand where I'm coming from. Everyone is entilted to their own opinion. In my opinion if you are weight loss counsellor you should practice what you preach otherwise you risk not being taken seriously. She was a good counsellor and I've learned a lot from the meetings. Sadly not enough it seems as I gained the weight back.
Hopefully as I embark on this new stage of my journey I'd learn more and hopefully being on here and getting advice from wonderful people like you will be a bonus

 

[Minerva]

my apologies if it seemed like I was judging you - not at all! I never judge unless I know the person very well, so it'd take a long time before I make any such decision! I don't know enough about your llc, you or any other factors, I was merely stating my opinion.
Again, sorry if my comment above looked weird and critical, was not meant that way! I'm sorry the counselling sessions weren't very good for you, to be fair, my first llc was pretty awful, she read text straight from the manual, almost as if she didn't understand it herself

 

[slim_and_happy]

my apologies if it seemed like I was judging you - not at all! I never judge unless I know the person very well, so it'd take a long time before I make any such decision! I don't know enough about your llc, you or any other factors, I was merely stating my opinion.
Again, sorry if my comment above looked weird and critical, was not meant that way! I'm sorry the counselling sessions weren't very good for you, to be fair, my first llc was pretty awful, she read text straight from the manual, almost as if she didn't understand it herself

She was ok. Don't get me wrong. I did learn enough to be able to stay on the program and successfully lose so much weight. I just got discouraged because she kept cancelling the meetings or sending replacements. All in all the reason I put the weight back on was that I obviously didn't learn enough to be able to keep it off no matter what life throws at me... And not doing the maintainance ()

 

[NatM70]

I know that!! Just jesting with you
Oh dear, is it catching, this computer geeky thing? I seriously hope not, for your sake!

Oh lovey, I REALLY hope that things regulate for you soon. I can't see why it would have messed up your 'system' permanently. I know these diets can mess with our monthlies, and I expect that tbh, but in the long run, surely it can't have done any major/permanent damage? I hope not anyway!

Good thinking (again!) - I think I'll do an inventory of my S&S stock tomo to decide what I need to order for the next 5 weeks. My last order was 140 items, and I based on 3 packs pd, that'd last me till mid April. BUT! Like a total doughnut, I didn't order correctly (great eh, I used to be an international buyer - think there's a reason I don't do that any more! - I have ONE shake and EIGHT bars left, arrgghh! So, I need to place an order and balance my stock.
Hoping I don't need too much - the less cost, the better!

Really can't wait to get back to Zumba and some long strenuous walks!

Had a great time at 'splish splash' - NEVER thought I'd do the mummy talk thing lol! Max loves it - total natural - he can do the breaststroke - never been taught, he just does it!

Aww, thanks lovely, I'll ditto that right back atcha!

Enjoy the rest of your evening! xxx

 

[<3_my_cat_x]

Hi Minerva - here to follow you if that's ok!

ps. I'm sorry my name is awkward hehe - I do love my cats (plural now ) though!

xxx

 

[Minerva]

Hi Minerva - here to follow you if that's ok!

ps. I'm sorry my name is awkward hehe - I do love my cats (plural now ) though!

xxx

Welcome <3_cat (I'll shorten it to that if that's ok ) Seems with the acquisition of another cat, your user name has become out of date!

I've always had dogs when I was little - but, for some reason I adore cats.. My stepmum has been heavily involved with the RSPCA for the last 15 years or so; doing accounting as well as re-homing/rescuing many of the furry creatures! At some points we were having about 50 cats in our house (temporarily of course). I loved it growing up, hand-feeding little kittens and falling in love with the oldies, now I have my own house with a little cat of my own. Just one will do though - for now - until he dies, then I may get two

x

 

[Minerva]

She was ok. Don't get me wrong. I did learn enough to be able to stay on the program and successfully lose so much weight. I just got discouraged because she kept cancelling the meetings or sending replacements. All in all the reason I put the weight back on was that I obviously didn't learn enough to be able to keep it off no matter what life throws at me... And not doing the maintainance ()

It's frustrating when these counsellors don't understand the value of consistency and being able to depend on someone. This diet is a very strange and emotional journey for a lot of people - it certainly was for me. It really uncovered so many things, emotions and behaviours I didn't know were there.. the point of the llc is to take you through it and be the person you can go to - as no one else around you will understand.
But then, I do remember when people didn't want to stay for meetings which made it harder too as the support network you learn to rely on isn't there...

The weight came back on because of extreme circumstances - you mustn't beat yourself up about it. I've had to move on from my blip too - caused by deaths in the family and immense educational stress; you need to learn to forgive yourself. You're only human, we all make mistakes; the important thing is to be able to LEARN from them. I think I'm better equipped now because I've gone through it. My last remaining grandmother died a few months ago and it didn't break me. I dealt with it in a much healthier way - I talked about it rather than choked my voice with food. I hope you can reflect on your losses too and be able to come to some conclusions as to how to deal with any similar situations in the future (I hope they don't repeat themselves though :hug99.

Maintenance is pretty important - but you do need to be in a healthy state of mind to do it. It requires such careful regulation and analysis of how you feel - it's actually quite exhausting! At least the 12-week LL plan was...

Either way, you're back to doing what's right for you - look at this as a journey to get over past hurts and moving on.

x

 

[Minerva]

I know that!! Just jesting with you
Oh dear, is it catching, this computer geeky thing? I seriously hope not, for your sake!

Oh lovey, I REALLY hope that things regulate for you soon. I can't see why it would have messed up your 'system' permanently. I know these diets can mess with our monthlies, and I expect that tbh, but in the long run, surely it can't have done any major/permanent damage? I hope not anyway!

Good thinking (again!) - I think I'll do an inventory of my S&S stock tomo to decide what I need to order for the next 5 weeks. My last order was 140 items, and I based on 3 packs pd, that'd last me till mid April. BUT! Like a total doughnut, I didn't order correctly (great eh, I used to be an international buyer - think there's a reason I don't do that any more! - I have ONE shake and EIGHT bars left, arrgghh! So, I need to place an order and balance my stock.
Hoping I don't need too much - the less cost, the better!

Really can't wait to get back to Zumba and some long strenuous walks!

Had a great time at 'splish splash' - NEVER thought I'd do the mummy talk thing lol! Max loves it - total natural - he can do the breaststroke - never been taught, he just does it!

Aww, thanks lovely, I'll ditto that right back atcha!

Enjoy the rest of your evening! xxx

LOL, I think I became infected with the computer geeky thing a long time ago! When I came to the UK I didn't know what a computer was; it was fascinating! I wish I'd studied Computer Science at Uni in all honesty - no idea why I didn't do it. My OH is an IT professional - or will be when he finished Uni this year. The IT company he was working with on placement year desperately want him back!
I'm a bit of a geek too, I like to play computer games and am not a stranger to technology, so I like the crowd I hang out with. None of that football fanaticism or the like here! Just good ol' computers, video games, geeky tv shows and rock music!

I hope I haven't messed my system up, but 2 years of eating sub-calories shouldn't affect the system permanently. There's medical solutions for everything, so for now I'm not worried. When I start family planning, then I'll look into it.

Lol - mummy talk.. I think I do that too much with my cat - I catch myself saying the most absurd things to him.. not that I'm likening your son to my cat... oh my god, did that come out wrong, LOL. But I'm sure I'd be the same with a baby if I had one, there's no harm in it. I think babies understand it better.
I'd like to make a suggestion - as he learns to talk - note down his own unique words for things on a piece of paper to show him when he's grown up. My parents/grandparents did this, it was amazing to see the development process! One word is still with me - my sister's nickname; I couldn't pronounce her real name when I was little, so the thing I COULD say stuck for life!

Hope you've had a nice day!

x

 

[Minerva]

Day 80.

Wow, 80 days already! I'm doing well, had my last classes this week... now the big study period begins... I have a timetable set out, hopefully I can stick to it. I've looked over what I need to study, now I need to make self-contained study-bundles so that I don't have to rush around looking for all the information when I'm actually studying. All in one place.
The rest of this week and next week - I'll be doing a 4000 word essay on Copyright Law - eep. Not something I know a lot about - but I'm sure I'll know a lot more by the end of next week!

Diet is going well. Tomorrow I'm having a day off the diet - going out to London for a meal with the OH and to meet up with my sister and a friend. I need a little breather before I plunge into all this studying! Won't be anything too extravagant, I don't plan to stick to 'protein only' + salad, but nothing over the top. And since my appetite is so much smaller right now, it won't be a problem.

Only 14lb to go until I'm overweight!! Can I be more excited about being overweight? Lol. At my pace that's 7 weeks though, so it's actually a lot further than it seems, which is LAME, but at least I know I'll get there! All's good, onwards and downwards.

 

[Curvy1]

Hey X you are doing so well xx xx inspirational