Minilady's Diary... getting back on track

[minilady]

What a lovely day I've had

It's Kim's 18th birthday, she was so excited!!! We spent the day together, did some shopping and went for lunch. This afternoon the rellies came round and this evening she took off to Bluewater with her boyfriend to buy his present, have a meal and go to the pictures

I'm so proud of her, she's gorgeous, intelligent, polite and just lovely. I'm really lucky to have such great kids

We're having a family meal for her on Friday evening at a local Beefeater and of course Saturday she's off clubbing!

Food wise I've been ok, sensible eating plus a slice of birthday cake

This week the scales showed a lb loss so am now just 3lb over my original goal weight. Definately sensible eating and a little more exercise is doing me the world of good. I havent felt the binge demon for a while so I know that depriving myself was like waving a stick at him, whilst eating a healthy balanced diet seems to keep him at bay.

Tracey
x

 

[BIG BIRDY]

Wish your daughter a happy birthday from me!

It's good too have great kids. DD I think will stay on the rails for now. DS is nearly 14, and too early to tell. I think he's the loose cannon here, so I'm trying to keep him close and those apron strings tied tight!

 

[x-Katie-x]

Awww Happy Birthday Kim Sounds like she had a perfect day, it's lovely when you're close enough to them that they want to spend time with you - luckily my 3 are all like that, even the two that have left home.

You really are an inspiration you know - to be 3lb above your goal after so long is just amazing to me, especially knowing what you go through re the overeating..... I can do 3lb in a day I'll be coming to you for lessons, advice and all sorts when I get to maintenance - you have your guru's, you're mine!

If I don't speak before, have a lovely evening on Friday xx

 

[ladylipo]

I'll pm you tomorrow with some

Hope you have a great holiday!!!!

Tracey
x

Ok thanks very much!
Im sure ill manage ta have some fun on holidays :giggle:

 

[minilady]

Wish your daughter a happy birthday from me!

Thanks Nikki

It's good too have great kids. DD I think will stay on the rails for now. DS is nearly 14, and too early to tell. I think he's the loose cannon here, so I'm trying to keep him close and those apron strings tied tight!

Yes boys are a different kettle of fish. I have 3 girls all of which are very open and tell me everything (even if I dont really want to hear it) I only have one son (he's 12) He's very loving and cuddles his old mum a lot, but quite secretive too. I think growing up with lots of sisters has made him sensitive to our womanly needs, but also he knows exactly what to say to make us happy and of course keeps the things that make us sad or worry to himself Actually he's a bit like his Dad, so will definately be keeping my eyes firmly on him

Awww Happy Birthday Kim Sounds like she had a perfect day, it's lovely when you're close enough to them that they want to spend time with you - luckily my 3 are all like that, even the two that have left home.

I cant believe you have 2 that have left home You don't seem old enough, are they at Uni?

That must be really hard having them leave home, I'm dreading the day all my have gone, but saying that I can fill the house with grandchildren hopefully Plus Cameron has told me he'll live here forever as it'll be cheaper than moving out

You really are an inspiration you know - to be 3lb above your goal after so long is just amazing to me, especially knowing what you go through re the overeating..... I can do 3lb in a day I'll be coming to you for lessons, advice and all sorts when I get to maintenance - you have your guru's, you're mine!

Ahhh thank you Katie

If I don't speak before, have a lovely evening on Friday xx

I'm really looking forward to it! My Dad, his wife and my sisters are all coming for the meal too, so it'll be a lovely night. We bought Kim a camera for her birthday, so hopefully lots of pics will be taken and I'll post a couple on here.

Ok thanks very much!
Im sure ill manage ta have some fun on holidays :giggle:

You'll have a great time

Hello. Well done on getting closer to your desired weight.

Thanks B

Ahhh it is so nice to read how you write about your daughter. Lovely!

I've been reading your diary and see you're thinking of CDing again, sorry Atkins didn't work out for you and really hope you can settle into a routine again soon.

Tracey
x

 

[minilady]

you look so different to your before photo. Can't imagine you as you were before, even with the photo.

Lol!!! People who knew me then could never imagine me slimmer!

That was taken at my 40th Bday party, the top I had on was a size 20. I used to avoid having my pic taken at all costs but as it was my party of course lots were taken of me It was when I looked through them that I decided to do something about my weight. I'd had such a great time and looking through the pics was wonderful until I saw the ones of me and I realised exactly how old fat and frumpy I looked :cry:

Tracey
x

 

[ladylipo]

Your before and after pic is amazing!

I can honestly say you look 10 years younger!

 

[x-Katie-x]

:wow: you look so different to your before picture, I wouldn't have known it was you It's good that you saw the photos and decided to do something --- I saw photos for years and years and just didn't acknowledge... wish I had!

I cant believe you have 2 that have left home You don't seem old enough, are they at Uni?

That must be really hard having them leave home, I'm dreading the day all my have gone, but saying that I can fill the house with grandchildren hopefully Plus Cameron has told me he'll live here forever as it'll be cheaper than moving out

LOL yep I'm that old My daughter is 19 and she's a nanny now in Derby and absolutely loving it - she's only been doing it and living away since February, she's coming home tomorrow for her first weekend back here since leaving, we've been to see her there but she's not been home. My son is 18 and he's just done his first year in the RAF - he's based over in Norfolk but he's a proper home-boy and comes home about once a month, he was here last weekend. So that leaves me with my 14yr old boy to keep me company, he's a star and though I keep skitting him about 'you'll be leaving soon' - the longer I get to keep him the better He's like your Cameron in that he's staying with me forever!

 

[minilady]

Your before and after pic is amazing!

I can honestly say you look 10 years younger!

Thank you

:wow: you look so different to your before picture, I wouldn't have known it was you It's good that you saw the photos and decided to do something --- I saw photos for years and years and just didn't acknowledge... wish I had!

Thank you. I waited til I was 40 before I started my diet, you'll have finished by the time you're 40, so in a way you beat me to it



LOL yep I'm that old My daughter is 19 and she's a nanny now in Derby and absolutely loving it - she's only been doing it and living away since February, she's coming home tomorrow for her first weekend back here since leaving, we've been to see her there but she's not been home. My son is 18 and he's just done his first year in the RAF - he's based over in Norfolk but he's a proper home-boy and comes home about once a month, he was here last weekend. So that leaves me with my 14yr old boy to keep me company, he's a star and though I keep skitting him about 'you'll be leaving soon' - the longer I get to keep him the better He's like your Cameron in that he's staying with me forever!

Ahh you'll have a lovely weekend with your family Have you planned anything special to do?

Tracey
x

 

[minilady]

I've had a binge :ashamed0005::argh: and now feel :sign0137:. Reason = Hubby and his bad moods. He's been sulky and moody since the weekend, firstly I tried lending a sympathetic ear, then I tried avoidance tactics, nothing seemed to work, he's happy and chatty to everyone else and I get a couple of syllables grunted at me.

Some friends were round this evening and he was full of the joys of spring as soon as they left his mood returned, he has a job to price up this evening then he's off to help someone work on their car. As soon as he left I started cramming in food (and if I'm honest I'm still sitting here eating a bag of haribo tangtastic which I dont even bloody like!!!)

Maybe it's because I'm bottling up what I'm feeling (hurt, anger etc.)that I have eaten instead. I know lots of people say they reward themselves with food, but I don't, I punish myself with the stuff (well the bad stuff anyway) As I pound the keys I am sure that because I have kept my feelings to myself instead of fronting the situation which because of his mood will inevitably end in a row (something I'd rather avoid), I'm now punishing myself instead of him.

Why cant he just say what's bothering him and be done with it. Oh yeah just remembered, cos he's a man

 

[flirty40greeneyes]

Oh Tracey that's sad .... tell him how you feel, and what it's made you do because you feel so hurt. Don't sabotage how well you've done though ..... bash him over the head with a frying pan if he won't listen!! Will use up the calories from the haribo's!!!

 

[minilady]

Oh Tracey that's sad .... tell him how you feel, and what it's made you do because you feel so hurt. Don't sabotage how well you've done though ..... bash him over the head with a frying pan if he won't listen!! Will use up the calories from the haribo's!!!

LOL! It'll need to be a bloody hard bash to use up all the calories I've consumed tonight

He's a complicted chappy and I do adore him, but he seems to go through these phases every 6 months or so I think it's a kind of depression and has got worse since he stopped smoking about 3 years ago. He finds it very hard to communicate his emotions and feelings (shitty upbringing) and so goes into these sulky childish strops from time to time:sigh:

We've been together for 14 years and I know how this little upset will end. I'll have enough of his behaviour and eventually let him have it both barrels, he'll stomp off, then come back cap in hand, wittering apologies and promising it wont happen again.

Tried asking him to go to see someone but he's not interested, I don't think he realises how bad he actually gets and he certainly dosent realise how it effects me because I'm as bad as him and keep lots to myself, including the binging which he knows nothing of.

Lol! we make a right pair!

I feel better for getting that of my chest! It's the first time I've openly said anything about my marriage, to everyone around me we have the perfect relationship. On the whole it's good, just sometimes it gets a little wobbly.

Feeling lots better now and have stopped eating

Tracey
x

 

[flirty40greeneyes]

Everyone has little foibles - and as long as you know what your OH's are .. and can accept them, it doesn't seem too bad to me! Yes he'd be better talking to someone - but if he won't there's not a lot you can do.

You need to find a good coping strategy for you though ... something non food related!!! Ebay?? Buy something ... or paint your nails or something that'll make you feel good - but won't damage the diet!

((HUGS)) and glad you feel better.

 

[x-Katie-x]

Tracey Bev is right in that we all have our quirks and sometimes we can get help that's needed for them and others we can't/won't -- this doesn't mean that our relationships are any less though because of them - are relationships are what they are with them.

Re the binge - moment of madness, you can look at it two ways, one you can see that it's something that you shouldn't of done, on the other hand it's a whole lot better than some things you could have done - better than slamming round the house/kicking a door which could have then effected others.

Though you don't like how Scott behaves in these times maybe you'd be better off going for acceptance - okay you don't like how he is a couple of weeks a year but the rest of the time he's just great ---- so when he's like that just think 'ahh stuff you', you carry on enjoying your life and even go so far as to go out when you wouldn't normally and let him see that it doesn't bother you ..... might even snap him out of it if it doesn't seem to be having the same effect.

And remember one binge does not your wonderful dieting achievement break! It'll probably hardly register on the scales and if it does you'll soon shift it.

Glad you're feeling better - hope today's a good one for you xxx

 

[minilady]

Thanks Bev and Katie for your words of advise, it's much appreciated.

Feeling a lot better today, although did do a bit of damage when I looked on the scales this morning.

However last nights blip dosent seem so important today, I guess that's why keeping a diary on here is so vital to me, great place to offload and vent any frustrations. Woke up feeling sicky and sluggish so have had lots of water and fruit today and am now nearly back to normal.

Off out for our family meal for Kim's birthday tonight and am really looking forward to it and if Scott dosent behave himself I'll ask the chef for his biggest frying pan

Tracey
x

 

[minilady]

Hopefully I've done this right! Had a lovely meal to celebrate Kim's BDay and here are a couple of pics

Kim!


My little sister Sam with my 3 lovely girls


Kim and Cameron


Kim and me

 

[x-Katie-x]

They're gorgeous photo's - looks like you all had a good night

 

[Porgeous]

Just catching up and sorry to hear you have been having a wobble with your OH. I've nothing constructive to add unfortunately but agree with Bev and Katie that sometimes people can change and sometimes they can't or won't. It sounds as though the majority of the time you make a great pair. Re the binge, I am still a novice to the long term eating thing but my gut feeling tells me that binges are just part of life and will happen for various reasons. It is how we respond to them that matters, one binge does not in itself undo everything you have achieved and you have already shown that you are able to draw a line under them and move on or you wouldn't have been maintaining for 11 months .

What a gorgeous family you have, really lovely pictures and looks like a good time was had by all.

Gxxxx

 

[minilady]

Peace has now returned. Scott can't do enough after realising what an arse he was last week, and I'm milking it for all it's worth

Had a busy weekend here. We're off for a short break to an american car show on Thursday and coming home on Monday. It'sbeen hectic rearranging clients and sorting out the caravan and car ready for our trip.

Yesterday was spent sorting out the caravan at Scott's friends' yard. Scott had to sort out the floor as it had got a bit spongy and I was worried someone would fall through it before long. I had the cleaning task which was fine until I opened a storage cupboard and was confronted by a little family of mice I dont know who was more terrified, I ran out of the caravan screaming (as you do) and fell straight into a bucket of soapy water, much to the amusement of everyone! Joys of leaving the caravan on a farm for the winter.

Scott removed poor family of mice, who got relocated in a sack in the nearst skip. He didnt tie the top so hopefully mother and babies escaped and are doing well (probably in the workshop kitchen by now, munching on biccies).

Weather here is rain, rain and a bit more rain and new lawn is loving it. Hope it improves for our weekend away.

I weighed myself this morning and have managed to lose a lb Not sure how that happened after my mammoth binge on Thursday, but asking no questions.

I'm now 2lb off original goal weight. So 2lb to lose before the 14th June which is my first anniversary of slimdom Hoping the weekend break won't bring on too much damage. Car shows are notorious for too much alcohol (well in my case anyway)

Tracey
x

 

[Porgeous]

MICE , I'm not good with mice... the vision of you screaming and landing in the bucket was very amusing though!

Congrats on the lb and how fabulous to be so close to your original goal weight for your first anniversary... mucho respect!

Gxx