Muffin top / bingo wings / back boobs no more!
- Thread starter new_mum31
- Start date
asmallertasha
Gold Member
You are truly hilarious!
Loveisaverb
Full Member
Good luck at M-I-L..... And can't wait to hear how you went on there!
Sent from my eye phone using MiniMins.com mobile app
Sent from my eye phone using MiniMins.com mobile app
She's just unbelievable.
Left elf while I went shopping. Came back and for some unknown reason they had took her nappy off to "air".
I don't get that When she has no nappy rash and she is in a front room. Not like she's on the grass or anything.
Anyway she prompt christened my father in law by peeing all over him.
I got in to pick her up and her socks and dress, urine SOAKED, had been put into elfs big nappy hold all bag. Wringing wet, not even rinsed out.
You couldn't write it
Left elf while I went shopping. Came back and for some unknown reason they had took her nappy off to "air".
I don't get that When she has no nappy rash and she is in a front room. Not like she's on the grass or anything.
Anyway she prompt christened my father in law by peeing all over him.
I got in to pick her up and her socks and dress, urine SOAKED, had been put into elfs big nappy hold all bag. Wringing wet, not even rinsed out.
You couldn't write it
Seriously she had not even wrung them out or rinsed under a tap.
Mmmmhhph.
So elf was up from 6 am to 7pm today. Rather horrific. She is totally like mummy though and eats loads when tired.
She ate a monster pile of noodles buy putting each noodle in her mouth and slurping it up. Love it. Ate tons.
However much tears at bedtime as she was over tired. She cried hysterically until I had to go in to settle her down.
My punishment for leaving her cry was her actually wiping her nose across my cheek and then belching in my face at point blank range.
So I have to stop messing about with my diet. I can't fit into my uniform.
and I have to buy a new uniform if I don't fit into it.really. Buy a new one!
So, desperate times call for desperate measures........I have bought a off road running push chair.
Its the absolute daddy. Immense..I could run over the mother in law and the elf wouldn't feel it with the suspension on this thing.
Infact tomorrow I'm going on a big big walk.my aim is to run over as many things as possible to test the suspension:
For the purpose of this I'm calling the new push chair Desmond:
Curbs -I think Desmond will laugh in the face of a curb
Gravel /rocks/ soil -as above
Sand - will Desmond power through or will I sink like I did with the old pram? twas Sightly funny, very hysterically scary though. Had to decide quickly what to save after Elf incase it was quick sand. And not normal beach sand. Even though there has never ever been quick sand where I live.
It could have been though.
Quickly decided it would be Elf, old pram as it was brand new at time, nappy day bag THEN hubby last. He was not amused at last ranking behind inanimate injects but my pram was lovely and so was my nappy bag so its only fair.
And my pram had lots of little attachments from Amazon. Hubby has no Amazon attachments such as bottle holder or hand bag hooks like the old pram.
Snow.an almost excited to try this three wheeled beauty on snow.
Cow pat. My last pram skidded and cried when it was faced with cow pat. I believe Desmond will storm through
I'm so excited about my walk I'm even going to lock the front wheel and power wobble -a cross between power walking and
Jogging - for a few minutes.
I'm stopping when anyone walks near by though
Mmmmhhph.
So elf was up from 6 am to 7pm today. Rather horrific. She is totally like mummy though and eats loads when tired.
She ate a monster pile of noodles buy putting each noodle in her mouth and slurping it up. Love it. Ate tons.
However much tears at bedtime as she was over tired. She cried hysterically until I had to go in to settle her down.
My punishment for leaving her cry was her actually wiping her nose across my cheek and then belching in my face at point blank range.
So I have to stop messing about with my diet. I can't fit into my uniform.
and I have to buy a new uniform if I don't fit into it.really. Buy a new one!
So, desperate times call for desperate measures........I have bought a off road running push chair.
Its the absolute daddy. Immense..I could run over the mother in law and the elf wouldn't feel it with the suspension on this thing.
Infact tomorrow I'm going on a big big walk.my aim is to run over as many things as possible to test the suspension:
For the purpose of this I'm calling the new push chair Desmond:
Curbs -I think Desmond will laugh in the face of a curb
Gravel /rocks/ soil -as above
Sand - will Desmond power through or will I sink like I did with the old pram? twas Sightly funny, very hysterically scary though. Had to decide quickly what to save after Elf incase it was quick sand. And not normal beach sand. Even though there has never ever been quick sand where I live.
It could have been though.
Quickly decided it would be Elf, old pram as it was brand new at time, nappy day bag THEN hubby last. He was not amused at last ranking behind inanimate injects but my pram was lovely and so was my nappy bag so its only fair.
And my pram had lots of little attachments from Amazon. Hubby has no Amazon attachments such as bottle holder or hand bag hooks like the old pram.
Snow.an almost excited to try this three wheeled beauty on snow.
Cow pat. My last pram skidded and cried when it was faced with cow pat. I believe Desmond will storm through
I'm so excited about my walk I'm even going to lock the front wheel and power wobble -a cross between power walking and
Jogging - for a few minutes.
I'm stopping when anyone walks near by though
Lychco
Full Member
Elf has been in so solid crew since she shiit bombed my high chair and kitchen floor.
Perhaps I could feed her some weetabix and stewed fruit before visiting in laws on Sunday.
Unethical yet tempting.am avoiding sleep to day dream about elf pooing through letter box of in laws.
Perhaps I could feed her some weetabix and stewed fruit before visiting in laws on Sunday.
Unethical yet tempting.am avoiding sleep to day dream about elf pooing through letter box of in laws.
Would love to see a photo of you and Elf? Really enjoying following your posts
Sent from my iPad using MiniMins
Desmond the pram RULES
we tackled a huge walk. He laughed in the face of gravel, mud, grass and was just brilliant at going up and down hill.
I did 11 miles I think. I had to put my hat on, the one that makes me look special. Elf had a whale of a time.
Mum popped round after. Dived in the shower. So tired I realised I had not took my bra off.
Really.
So off to bed really early tonight
we tackled a huge walk. He laughed in the face of gravel, mud, grass and was just brilliant at going up and down hill.
I did 11 miles I think. I had to put my hat on, the one that makes me look special. Elf had a whale of a time.
Mum popped round after. Dived in the shower. So tired I realised I had not took my bra off.
Really.
So off to bed really early tonight
The elf has given up sleep.
its a combo of the crazy heat, it being so light, and the elf being related to problem child.
Bed at 8. Ish . then up at 12 till 3am
Awful. Hysterical crying as she wanted to play and not be in her cot.
even tried the social services NON approved technique of calpol.
It failed.
Anyhoo up at 6.30 so i went on a big walk. Massive one . At 8 20 am the elf. Walked till 1020.
More updated to follow. Elf crying
its a combo of the crazy heat, it being so light, and the elf being related to problem child.
Bed at 8. Ish . then up at 12 till 3am
Awful. Hysterical crying as she wanted to play and not be in her cot.
even tried the social services NON approved technique of calpol.
It failed.
Anyhoo up at 6.30 so i went on a big walk. Massive one . At 8 20 am the elf. Walked till 1020.
More updated to follow. Elf crying
Loooong day.
So did my massive walk...and and I even jogged between trees when I could. Elf slept through. Desmond the push chair is ace but I sear my pelvic for is ruined
Not jogged since before elf and it killed me
Had to have a pizza express to say goodbye to pelvic floor.
Also has to have white chocolate buttons
I may, just may go in for over eaters anonymous
X
So did my massive walk...and and I even jogged between trees when I could. Elf slept through. Desmond the push chair is ace but I sear my pelvic for is ruined
Not jogged since before elf and it killed me
Had to have a pizza express to say goodbye to pelvic floor.
Also has to have white chocolate buttons
I may, just may go in for over eaters anonymous
X
Pinknails2012
Gold Member
Sounds about right I prefer chocolate to mine 
Had a lovely weekend..hubby off on Friday. Took elf to a museum and mini Hitler security guard would not let push chair in.
Incase we either stole items, bumped onto them and damaged them or -I quote- "the push chair may affect others enjoyment as it will get in the way"
I love a good row when the tines right and wow this time was right.
I very sarcastically told him that my mission as a full time thief was not too steal priceless exhibits in a museum but all the fake uggs in primark. I also told him that I was not planning on running anyone or anything over and I couldn't care less what anyone else thought of my child in a push chair.
Hubby hid at this stage.
I then demanded to see the manager. He looked like pee wee Hermann. I ranted at him and told him that his policies towards children was discriminatory and illegal. Firstly for suspecting me of theft because I pushed a pushchair. Secondly for suggesting I would commit criminal damage and that our presence would offend others.
Poor sod actually tried to argue back but realised it was futile when hubby shouted from his hiding place
"don't pull the plug out of the grenade!! She once sat on the floor of dfs and refused to move!! Two hours she was there!!". That's another story like but anyway.
He relented and let us in. For free. A museum not letting a push chair in during the school holidays.
And the exhibition was ****.
I have however been storming around with the push chair on massive walks. Huge. And I have started jogging a bite. Only a very small bit but every little helps.
But that nabs I think I can eat what I please due to this small daily exercise excursion.
And I mean anything
Incase we either stole items, bumped onto them and damaged them or -I quote- "the push chair may affect others enjoyment as it will get in the way"
I love a good row when the tines right and wow this time was right.
I very sarcastically told him that my mission as a full time thief was not too steal priceless exhibits in a museum but all the fake uggs in primark. I also told him that I was not planning on running anyone or anything over and I couldn't care less what anyone else thought of my child in a push chair.
Hubby hid at this stage.
I then demanded to see the manager. He looked like pee wee Hermann. I ranted at him and told him that his policies towards children was discriminatory and illegal. Firstly for suspecting me of theft because I pushed a pushchair. Secondly for suggesting I would commit criminal damage and that our presence would offend others.
Poor sod actually tried to argue back but realised it was futile when hubby shouted from his hiding place
"don't pull the plug out of the grenade!! She once sat on the floor of dfs and refused to move!! Two hours she was there!!". That's another story like but anyway.
He relented and let us in. For free. A museum not letting a push chair in during the school holidays.
And the exhibition was ****.
I have however been storming around with the push chair on massive walks. Huge. And I have started jogging a bite. Only a very small bit but every little helps.
But that nabs I think I can eat what I please due to this small daily exercise excursion.
And I mean anything
