stupid muffy hasnt stopped eating since the inlaws came up on 23rd septemeber. i was just 2oz from being in the 10's that day. my goal was to be 10 stone 7 by this friday. im now 12 stone.
the weather has cooled alot so im finding it easier so far today. i kow its only 9.30 but iv been up a while. i opened a bar but after 2 bites i gave it to jag. i had 2 pints of water.
i went to take kids to school this morning and i saw my self in a car window
![Frown :( :(](data:image/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAIAAAAAAAP///yH5BAEAAAAALAAAAAABAAEAAAIBRAA7)
my belly is huge and my leggings are digging in giving me 3 rolls. my top is skin tight and i have orange hair (dye went wrong) and 2 huge spots on my chin. how on earth am i going to go away for the weekend and feel good abaout myself?
iv got an appointment at the hair dressers tomorrow. it will cost £65 to have my hair trimmed and a new colour put on it. if i dont like the new colour im just going to cry :'(
got invited out for dinner on friday night when we get to london. not looking forwar to that at all. everyone watching me eat and i have nothing to wear to dinner, plus the money i had saved for the weekend seems to be getting less and less each day because im dipping into it for bread and milk and nappies and i still need to use more of it this week to make sure there is food here for my kids and mum and dad while im away. its all going so wrong....
:sigh:
my new phone is rubbish for minimins. my laptop is still broken. iv borrowed my mums laptop to update my miserable diary.
ill try to catch up with you all later. xxx