My management journey

Ah thanks Carolynne :D I have just posted on your thread about your transition to developers. I found that bit harder than any other on LL so ride it out and I promise it will get easier ;)
 
Monday 2nd October

Today my daughter was on the first of three occasions this week where she stays all day at infant school (she doesn’t actually go full time until the end of October) so today was going to be a bit of a test for me. On the way to Asda to get some more salad and veggies (this eating lark is proving more expensive than I thought) I went into town and bought another pair of combat trousers because my size 14’s fall down and I doubled in weight taking my daughter to school because they soaked up all the puddles. The 12’s I tried were too big round the waist but the 10’s gave me a muffin top and I hate it when I see girls in hipsters with big rolls of skin squeezed out the top as it looks disgusting, buying one size up is far more flattering. Having come home and worn my new ones for a while, I think I will go back and buy the size 10’s as well because my skin is definitely shrinking back and not only that but these trousers have relaxed now I have been in them for ½ an hour. Ay only 14 quid they were a bargain!

Having had an off the rails moment yesterday, the last thing I want to do is get into the mindset of ‘Oh well, I can always go back to ssing for a week or two to get back to my goal weight if I need to’. I am desperately striving towards having a healthy attitude towards food which means you don’t have to be good all of the time, just most of it. Ssing is great for losing weight in the first place but isn’t a lifestyle choice. I liken it a bit like using the morning after pill as a contraceptive measure, you might have to do so very occasionally but it shouldn’t be relied on to put right the wrongs. Mind you, I still have to test myself in the real world of food and I am just starting to find out how difficult that is and that is before I have even entered into the trigger food stages of the programme. BUM!

My goal each day is to tick all the right boxes on the list at the bottom of each post, I have added a few on for good measure. If I have to engage the controlling parent for a while then so be it, anything to get me back on track and in the habit.

A friend of mine was relating a conversation she and her neighbour had about me and her neighbour called me ‘tiny’. When I said I’d never been called ‘tiny’ before but that I was flattered anyway, my friend referred me back to my shopping trip this morning and pointed out that a size 10 trousers for someone my height made me tiny. I don’t believe it and pointed out that I was still 10st 10lbs with a 30.5 inch waist which could hardly be classed as tiny. All I can think of is that the sizes have changed since the last time I was slim and that I am the equivalent of a size 14 from then. I don’t think I’m tiny, I think I am relatively slim compared to others but I still have ‘issues’ with my muffin top and toning. The only way I am going to be able to deal with these issues is by actually taking the bull by the horns and doing something about it. No more self sabotaging close to my goal, I have to get comfortable with the new me although I am pretty close to feeling that now. I can’t help thinking about that programme where they line up 10 women and you have to point out where you would be in the line. I don’t think I’d be able to do that yet because I can’t do comparisons.

Breakfast: Mushroom soup with Psyllium husks a splash of soy sauce. Lunch: 225grms of red cabbage with lemon & salt dressing, cucumber and cauliflower. Snack: Lemon bar made into biscuits. Dinner: more red cabbage with Salmon mousse made from smoked salmon mixed with quark, milk, ginger, lemon juice and black pepper.

Morning weight: 10st 10.2lbs – could be worse!
Activity: Walked a fair bit down town and to and from school.
Water: Good. 4 consistent litres
Toning: None again. Must do better.
I ate whilst doing nothing else: No, not for any meal.
I completed the LL homework: Nope.
I stuck to the listed food and quantity: Yes but ate too much of it so I couldn’t get my last pack in.
Weight: Officially 10st 12lbs or 152lbs BMI 23.8 having drunk 1L
Day 9 of the route to management.
 
Hi, I'm hoping to get to my goal weight soon and am following your thread avidly!

I really laughed at your clothes thing about the sizes changing. I thought it was just me! I'm down to 10st 8 and am 5ft 3.5. I know I have a tummy and was a generous size 14 when this weight before. Now I can buy combats from Next in a 12, size 10 trousers from M&S and bought a pair of 8 trousers from Next for my suit (stretch) but I know that with a 32in waist I'm not stick thin.

The bit that I'm not happy about is the muffin top thing. How come I have two???
 
Tuesday 3rd October

Today has been a day of achievements and enlightenment for me today and I am very happy with my progress. :D

The morning weigh in wasn’t as bad as I had feared it would be today. I would like to be 10st 8lbs most of the time to give me a 2lb buffer zone so I don’t go over 10st 10lbs. I have been maintaining my weight now since 21st September which is 12 days. I suppose I should be losing still at this stage but I really only wanted to maintain my weight up until today’s desire to lose another couple of lbs. I have time of the month looming so I will be interesting to see what happens to my morning weight in the week after that because that seems to be the week I am at my heaviest. Interestingly enough, I had identified that I had a craving for red meat 2 days prior to coming on. My week 3 starts on Sunday and I am able to choose red meat and liver so I wonder what will happen? Will I have cravings? Is my desire for extra protein over the past through days a result of this? I think I have an iron deficiency at this time of this month so will have to address that by eating veggies higher in iron if need be.

All day yesterday after eating the cabbage, my tummy was grumbling and I had dreadful wind! I love cabbage but I am going to have to watch out how much of it I have if I want to strive towards being ladylike! Fat chance! :rolleyes:

I had my second management meeting this morning and once again I find myself learning heaps, I am getting so much from this stage. I think a lot of my problems as I perceived them was because I was in a rush in the morning that I didn’t have a food pack for breakfast to kick start my metabolism. I know realise that I have been guilty of saving up my food packs and conventional food choices for a binge in the evening. This is something I realise that I used to do pre LL. I need to make sure that I am more consistent in my food consumption to regulate my metabolism. :)

I am leaving it too long before I am eating for the first time in the day so I feel starving and the first overeating of the day occurs. Then I don’t feel hungry after that but continue to graze for the rest of the day so that I am eating late into the evening and then not feeling hungry for breakfast which continues the cycle. :(

I need to make sure that I am spacing my food evenly to try to prevent the tendency to binge eat when I feel starving and so that I don’t have the food allowance there to make me think that this is OK to do. So to combat this I have devised a rough timetable which will obviously have to change as I drop a food pack next week. 8am food pack for breakfast. 10.30 jelly or yoghurt if wanted. 1pm Conventional food dinner or food pack. 4pm conventional food or food pack depending on previous choice. 6.30pm veg snack. 8.30pm food pack. I should find it quite easy to drop the 8.30pm food pack after getting into the swing of things which will also serve to make me feel ready for my breakfast the next morning. :D

I went into Asda again today on the way home from LL, this time to get all the low fat dairy options I am now able to choose from. When I got home I thought about bingeing because I was really hungry but what I had learnt from my meeting stopped this and I had a bar made into biscuits instead. I ate this whilst listening to my new LL CD so I have done some homework today too. Then when I had finished I created some delicious marinades poached from the LL 1-4 week recipes book. I prepared the protein portion of my next 3 meals and wrapped them in foil ready for cooking when required – fast food! After that I made up a dip using 3 tablespoons of low fat natural yoghurt mixed with 1 teaspoon of Dijon mustard. Having made this up in a mug I was surprised at how much there was. I actually started with only 2 tablespoons of mustard but it was too strong for my tastes so I added another spoonful. I decided to decant this into my Jack Daniels shots glasses and was shocked to see that there was too much for 2 of them so my consumption of shop bought fat free dressing isn’t as much as I thought it was. Having made up the dip I weighed out 225grms of veggies for my snack today. It came to 220grms and in previous times I would have tried to eeck out that 5 grams to make sure I got as much as I was allowed, this time I just left it. I’m really proud of that little fact. I ate some of it during the afternoon whilst doing nothing except listening to my LL CD but I was soon satisfied so put the rest back in the fridge. That’s another major achievement for me today.:D

Today’s meal was salmon steak marinated in natural yoghurt and garam masalla and baked in foil. It wasn’t served with anything because I could face the salad and I don’t want any more raw veggies. For my evening meal I had more protein as I had Rainbow trout which I shouldn’t have had because I had already had my protein for the day, I should have just had salad or raw veggies. I don’t like lettuce very much but I don’t absolutely hate it either so I need to change away from veggies. Hopefully I won’t be as windy as I have been too! I don’t need anything else to eat tonight.

If I can just stick to the portion sizes then I should be able to get into the 10st 8’s but the protein keeps calling me and I can’t help wondering if this is because TOTM is imminent.:confused:

Morning weight: 10st 9.8lbs
Activity: Walked to and from school once.
Water: 4 litres but not entirely consistent.
Toning: 10 mins :D
I ate whilst doing nothing else: Yes for lunch and part of my snack.
I completed the LL homework: Yes I listened to the LL CD twice. :D
I stuck to the listed food and quantity: Yes, but not the quantity :(
Weight: Officially 10st 11.2lbs not that this is what I am going by!
Day 10 of the route to management.
 
Wednesday 4th October

True to form I wasn’t hungry this morning but made sure I had a chocolate shake and 2 pints of water before leaving the house to start the day and give my body some nourishment after the drought and famine of overnight.

I should just mention that my water requirements had dropped from 4 to 3 litres a day but I will be downing a minimum of 4 litres a day to help me feel full, keep my skin nice and keep my number 2’s of a good consistency so I don’t get bunged up.

I was surprised at the results of my morning weigh in because I hadn’t done a poo this morning and I came on early by a few days because I have forgotten to take my pill the last few days. I feel slightly bloated but not hugely so and did have some cramps. Could TOTM explain my want of party food on Sunday and the extra protein choices? Am I being overly optimistic?

I took a LL bar and a jelly round to my dad’s and had lunch round there. It felt nice eating with them again, I was actually joining in. Who’d have thought that eating a sugar free jelly could have such an impact!

This afternoon I measured out my 225grms of yellow pepper, courgette, cucumber, mushrooms, and cauliflower and because I enjoyed the Dijon Mustard dip I made up some more for today. I put it all out on a plate and sat down to eat whilst listening to my LL CD. I actually ate one thing at a time and tried only to load up my fork with the next mouthful when I had finished the last one. I have to say that this took some doing. Concentrating on eating made it take longer to finish and I got the ‘I’ve had enough feeling’ before I had scoffed the lot so I put the rest in the fridge.

I then made up a tandoori chicken marinade for the chicken for hubby and I – the first time we will be eating the same thing even if not actually at the same time - whilst listening to the rest of the CD. This was 2 small free range chicken breasts cubed and marinated in a small amount of salt and lemon juice whilst I made up the main marinade. I made 3/4 inch of ginger and 1 garlic clove into a paste and stirred into some low fat natural yoghurt along with some tandoori seasoning and then added to the chicken mixture so it will be nicely seasoned for tonight. I had mine (which my daughter tried and loved) with some white cabbage and hubby had his with rice and a load of cooked veggies. I had my last bar a bit later for supper but my nibbling habit could the better of me and I tucked into some cottage cheese – well quite a bit of cottage cheese at about 9.30pm so I don’t think I’ll feel ready for my chocolate shake first thing tomorrow morning. I’m going to have to go back to having my bath in the evenings again because there is no doubt about it, my biggest food demon seems to be boredom.

I had the rest of my snack veg when I got in from school. I didn’t eat in the same way and didn’t feel as satisfied and had another sugar fee jelly (should just point out that I portion my jelly into 0.2l plastic cups) so I have learnt a lesson there but just need to implement it. I deserve to take time out for me and look after my food consumption as it helps me to listen to my own body but will I actually do it?

Today has been another great day for me with more successes to be proud of. I didn’t eat everything on my plate and was able to save some for later, I listened to my CD, I was able to eat the same as my hubby for the first time so far (he doesn’t like fish which is a shame as I now prefer fish to meat) and I am feeling good about remaining a successful weight maintainer by making good decisions for the majority of the time and keeping a close eye on my weight.

Morning weight: 10st 8.6lbs
Activity: walked to and from school twice
Water: 4 consistent litres
Toning: None
I ate whilst doing nothing else: Morning shake whilst doing diary, lunch was social, 1st snack yes, second snack no, dinner was social, last food pack was whilst on the computer.
I completed the LL homework: Listened to my CD again
I stuck to the listed food and quantity: Yes, yes yes!!!
Weight: Officially 10st 11.2lbs not that this is what I am going by!
Day 11 of the route to management.
 
Thursday 5th October

I had a chocolate shake made into a muffin for breakfast whilst updating my blog. I wasn’t hungry because of last night’s pig out on cottage cheese quite late on but I have to try and get into the habit of eating first thing and not eating last this. It is a failing I have had my whole life because I don’t ever remember having breakfast regularly, not even when I was a kid.

I drove to school this morning because it was pelting down and came home and got straight on with hovering and mopping all the floors and then preparing my lunch to take round to my dad’s. That was it with no time to stop before going and picking up my daughter and going straight round to my dad.

I used my snack quota for a lunch at my dads and made a fromage frais and mint dip for it. I also had chicken with it. It took me ages to eat my lunch as I tried to finish the last mouthful before eating the next and I couldn’t manage it all so I put it back in the fridge to eat later. I also had a jelly topped with a table spoon of low fat Greek style yoghurt and a shake of nutmeg on top. Delicious! I had the second half of my lunch at 4.30pm and came home and had a bar made into biscuits at 6.30pm.

I had more raw veggies and dip in the evening and another sugar free yoghurt this time topped with fromage frais mixed with vanilla essence which I didn’t enjoy as much as the Greek style low fat yoghurt. I didn’t have my last pack as it was already late by the time I had finished eating my veg.

I do like having a nibble in the evenings so some cal low fat nibbles I can graze on should always be ready for the evening to stop me pigging out on unwanted extra calories that would mean that I don’t have an appetite for breakfast.

Today has been very easy, even the boring evening. There’s a lot to be said for keeping busy or is it because the critical TOTM is actually here rather than the build up to it or perhaps it is because I am actually doing the thinking aspect of the programme again? :confused:

Morning weight: 10st 9.2lbs
Activity: Apart from a ton of house work, none.
Water: 4 litres
Toning: Nope
I ate whilst doing nothing else: I mainly eat whilst on the computer.
I completed the LL homework: Completing this reminded me to listen to the CD again so yes!
I stuck to the listed food and quantity: Yes – finally!
Weight: Officially 10st 11.2lbs not that this is what I am going by!
Day 12 of the route to management.
 
Friday 5th October

Last night I had dreadful problems with my tummy. It ached and gurgled and felt all bloated and windy again and I think I can correlate this against when I have white cabbage. I wish I had done my food diary over these past couple of weeks but I haven’t touched it yet. I am going to be really pissed off it does turn out to be the cabbage. I have gone backwards in a way because I used to like lettuce leaves and now I actually can’t face them so going for shredded cabbage was a good alternative. I’m not going to but anymore which is going to be hard because I love them and actually find them very more-ish. I’m going to try watercress and spinach instead and so how I get on.

I decided to go to week 3 tomorrow instead of Sunday because the meal hubby and I will be going for to celebrate his Birthday at the end of the month will be on a Saturday so this will put me on week 6 for then which allows tropical fruits and nuts which is contained in many Chinese dishes so my forward planning makes sense. We are going to go to a posh Chinese restaurant and I bought a posh full length slinky cocktail dress which I will wear that night to make it a really special occasion.

I know hubby has been finding this weight loss business really difficult despite being very proud and supportive of me. He has always loved and fancied me no matter what but I haven’t been confident. I thought that would all change when I lost the weight and to a certain extent it has – when I am dressed. When I am undressed I am very critical of my dough belly which although is shrinking back, it is rather wrinkly and the skin is empty and remains creased and doesn’t bounce back into shape because it doesn’t have very much to go back to! Hubby couldn’t give a stuff either way and is very admiring of my new figure but I am less enamoured. I have to take some of my own advice and not expect perfection from my body. Stretch marks I do not have not problem with, I treat them as a badge of honour and have had a child so I am comfortable with them. I had them before having my daughter but don’t tell anyone! The tummy issue I need to work on. Doing a diet was never going to give me the perfect body but it does make me a pretty good clothes horse. I know I am being too critical of myself and I need to loosen up a bit. I’m going to do a nude mirror examination and come to terms and accept myself for what I am so I can work out what I actually look like undressed. The closest I get to actually seeing that part of my body in detail is when I am in the bath and my tummy have so much ‘give’ in it that it just floats to the surface under my nose which isn’t the most flattering of views – it amuses me whilst I’m in the bath poking, prodding and pinching it but isn’t so funny when I get out. I bet it doesn’t look half as bad out of the bath as it does in it so I need to face up to my tummy demon.

Because the weather was so wet and dismal today I had hot chocolate shake for breakfast and no, I wasn’t hungry but had it anyway. I have to try and beat my late evening eating problem. I can sit and eat in peace and relax if I eat after my daughter has gone to bed but also boredom play a huge part.

For lunch today I had my veg snack allowance with shop bought fat free Thai style salad dressing and a spicy marinated rainbow trout followed by sugar free jelly topped with reduced fat fromage frais. For afternoon snack I had a toffee bar made into biscuits and another jelly and then a lemon bar made into biscuits in the evening and some cottage cheese. I wasn’t hungry in the evening after that so I didn’t have my ‘meal’ allowance of salad.

I had a bath after my daughter went to bed and read through my management book. Tonight has been the easiest evening I have had so far.

When my hubby got home at 10.40pm and made a beeline for the kitchen to eat, I followed him out an opened the fridge to see what I was going to have and realised that not only was I not hungry but weirdly enough, I didn’t actually want anything either! I shut the fridge and then looked at my hubby in amazement and he grinned back at me knowing exactly what I had just done and how big a deal it was for me. Not being hungry in the past has never meant that I have not wanted food anyway. This LL malarkey is definitely having measurable positive effects.

Morning weight: 10st 7.8lbs – Never been in the 10st 7’s before.
Activity: ½ hour riding
Water: 4 consistent litres
Toning: None
I ate whilst doing nothing else: I always ate whilst on the computer
I completed the LL homework: I read through the management book again tonight.
I stuck to the listed food and quantity: Yes and yes – could be a new habit forming!
Weight: Officially 10st 11.2lbs but the morning weigh in is my guide
Day 13 of the route to management.
 
When my hubby got home at 10.40pm and made a beeline for the kitchen to eat, I followed him out an opened the fridge to see what I was going to have and realised that not only was I not hungry but weirdly enough, I didn’t actually want anything either! I shut the fridge and then looked at my hubby in amazement and he grinned back at me knowing exactly what I had just done and how big a deal it was for me.

So lovely that you could share that moment with him, that he understood :)
 
So lovely that you could share that moment with him, that he understood :)

Thanks DQ. The amazing thing is that we didn't have to say a word, we both knew that this was a landmark moment :D
 
Saturday 6th October

Today was the start of week 3 of the route to management for me. I can now have red meat, game etc and some low GI fruits (not bananas). I made a list this morning and went shopping for 1 portion of meat and 2 pieces of fruit a day but didn’t end up with that. The trouble with shopping in village shops is that they don’t have what you are looking for so you have to be able to adapt on your feet unlike in a supermarket where they have everything all the time. I have always loved pretty much all veg and could eat it until it came out of my ears but I never took to fruit. So my big challenge for this week is to make sure I have at least 2 pieces of different fruit a day. If I can get into fruit so I see it as the logical choice for a fast food snack and love it then this is going to be a big step towards some of the changes I need to make to my diet so avoid gaining weight again. Managing my weight isn’t just going to be a case of eating the same as I did before (minus the binges) because I want to have a better diet too. I was so careful to bring my daughter up with a love and expectation for the best foods and she snacks on fruit. She also has the occasional chocolate bar or iced cream as part of a balanced diet and I have never sugar or salt to anything she has, I would do well to eat as she does.

I ditched the last of the white cabbage this morning because I gave in and ate more of it yesterday got the usual fermenting in my tummy by night time. I kept the red cabbage and to see how I got on with that. If ok, I’ll obviously continue with it and then have another go at the white cabbage in a week or so time just confirm either way if I definitely have a problem.

I had a chicken soup for breakfast which I ate whilst in the bathroom talking to my daughter who was in the bath. I had a peach for a snack whilst sat in the car listening to the radio after I had finished shopping 5 mins before my daughter’s dance class finished – delicious, no problems in eating lots of peaches! I had another peach at home whilst my steak with Cajun spices was grilling and I had prepared red cabbage, cucumber, plum tomatoes, green pepper all of which I ate with no additional dressings just mopping up the steak juices. There are several achievements to note about this meal, I ate whilst listening to the LL CD, I didn’t eat the fat on the edge of the steak which was my favourite, I put my knife and fork down between each mouth full and also I only ate half the dinner and put the rest back in the fridge. I have to say that I am delighted with myself! I had the second half cold at 5.30pm followed by a sugar free jelly topped with low fat Greek yoghurt mixed with cinnamon and then another one without waiting to see if the hunger pangs had been quashed. Then at 8.50pm, when I came home, I had a small bowl of red cabbage (the red cabbage doesn’t seem to have the same affect on me as the white cabbage) which I ate whilst doing nothing else and made a lemon bar into biscuits which I ate whilst typing up my diary.

Morning weight: 10st 7.8lbs
Activity: Walked to and from the car park to the village and did my shopping in 2 lots.
Water: 4.5 inconsistent litres
Toning: None
I completed the LL homework: Listened to the LL CD, read some of the book, itemised my food choices in my diary.
I stuck to the listed food and quantity: Yes for the 3rd day running!
Weight: Officially 10st 11.2lbs but the morning weigh in is my guide
Day 14 of the route to management completed.
 
Sunday 7th October

It has just occurred to me that I am not going to be able to make my management meeting on Tuesday morning because I have a hack booked for 10am. I phoned LL and left a left to explain the situation and to ask when I could pop in for my packs.

I needed to go and get a load more fruit today because my husband basically ate all the strawberries and my daughter tried some of everything but didn’t eat very much of anything and then dumped the rest in the bin as I found out this morning. That £7 worth of fruit in 2 days, gone!

Today has been easy. I haven’t felt hungry. I enjoyed what I ate and I wasn’t preoccupied with the thought of food at all. Success!

I ate my breakfast of a chocolate shake made into porridge whilst sat down listening to the radio. I sat down with my family to a lunch of a grilled back bacon rasher (fat cut off – never done that before), 7 grilled plum tomatoes finished with balsamic vinegar and a whole egg which Ginger, one of my hens, had just laid so it came from chicken to in my mouth within 10 mins which wasn’t bad! I ate fruit in the car with my family in the afternoon which consisted of 2 peaches and half an apple. I bought myself a strawberry and vanilla smoothie from M&S expecting to really enjoy it but I took a sip and when I wasn’t too impressed I looked at the label and realised that had I drunk the whole thing there would have been 250 calories in it. As I said to my husband if I had an allowance of 250 calories to consume there are far nicer choices to be had so he drank it instead and I went back to my water very satisfied with my decision. When I got home I had a snack of sugar free jelly topped with cinnamon low fat Greek yoghurt to stop me picking whilst preparing dinner. Evening meal was with my family and consisted of lamb chop with a Worcestershire, stock and coriander sauce served with a salad of cauliflower, green pepper, red cabbage, cucumber, mushrooms, tomatoes and a homemade yoghurt, mint and mustard dressing. I didn’t cut the fat off when eating the lamb and that is the only food choice I am disappointed with in hindsight. I’ll have to make sure that I do this before cooking next time so lesson learnt. I had and evening snack of lemon bar made into biscuits which I ate whilst updating my diary.

Morning weight: 10st 7.8lbs
Activity: Nothing out of the ordinary so poor
Water: 4.5 litres
Toning: None
I completed the LL homework: I read through some more of the book and itemised my food choices in my diary.
I stuck to the listed food and quantity:
Weight: Officially 10st 11.2lbs but the morning weigh in is my guide
Day 15 of the route to management completed.
 
Monday 8th October

I am happy with my morning weigh in again as the weight is holding nicely. I have to force myself to write this because the old self doubts of ‘tempting fate’ are yelling at me to stop. I have to get used to the fact that I make my own luck as far as my weight holding abilities go and that fate doesn’t play a part. Fate will play a part in what happens in my life but I am the one who decides how I react to what the gods throw at me. I have decided that my comfort zone is to be 10st 6lbs to 10st 9lbs and will aim to stay within that as that keeps me well within the 23’s in terms of BMI.

I think I will continue to weigh myself each morning on a daily basis for this week and then swap to every other day weigh in for next week.

It struck me this morning that I didn’t stick to the listed quantities of food yesterday as I had protein at 2 meals and it is supposed to be limited to protein only in one meal. Oh well, I’m pleased with how the day went anyway as I made conscious choices throughout. That is going to be the big challenge for me, feeling that I am able to choice what and how much I eat rather than feeling out of control and that I can’t chose or stop. Bingeing for me isn’t limited to bingeing on cakes and chocolate but can be on anything, even the best food choices but I find I can’t easily make food up in advance because I become obsessed with the thought of eating if I am at home. I’m going to have to find ways of dealing with this, getting out more is one answer but I want to be able to feel comfortable in my own home and not feel like I have to avoid it so I have some thinking to do.

One thing I have discovered is that option of a hot drink would be enough to take the edge off of a want of food. This may sound elementary to many but I have always been a water drinker. I have never wanted tea or coffee, I have never wanted cordials, fizzy drinks or fruit juice because water has been my drink of choice so finding that I can use a hot drink as another weapon in my armoury is quite a breakthrough. I only have caffeine free coffee in my house which stems from 5 years ago when I was pregnant and got into the habit of a milky coffee before bed. I don’t want to start having caffeine now.

I ate a breakfast of chocolate shake made into porridge with my daughter whilst listening to the radio. Mid morning snack 1 peach and sugar free jelly topped with yoghurt ate in the kitchen listening to radio. Lunch was salad of red cabbage (doesn’t have the same effects as the white and doesn’t make me want more), celery, courgette, mushroom, green pepper, red pepper, cottage cheese with balsamic vinegar. Mid afternoon snack was a plum and then an apple. Dinner was a grilled pork chop cooked with Cajun spice and more of the same salad the same as lunch followed by my jelly. Learning from the lesson of yesterday I removed all visible fat before cooking to remove temptation. Evening snack was LL lemon bar made into biscuits eaten whilst I typed up my diary.

Morning weight: 10st 7.8lbs
Activity: walked to and from school, sanded and painted the woodwork in the bathroom.
Water: 5 litres
Toning: None
I completed the LL homework: Read more of the magazine and book, listened to some of the CD, detailed my food choices in my diary.
I stuck to the listed food and quantity: Yes
Weight: Officially 10st 11.2lbs but the morning weigh in is my guide
Day 16 of the route to management completed.
 
:eek: Karen I can't tell you how much that means to me coming from you so thank you :D
 
Tuesday 9th October

I had my lunch sat at the table with my daughter whilst listening to the radio. It was the usual salad selection with fat free Italian Dressing and a peach to finish. I kept wanting to go to the fridge, in fact I did go a few times but the difference today was that I was able to get enough time between my impulse to nibble and the action to question whether I was really hungry and why I felt the need to visit the fridge. The upshot is that I was bored and would rather be back at the stables or anywhere out of the house because I keep feeling drawn to the computer which is keeping me away from life. I didn’t need to nibble and I didn’t nibble so that is an excellent result from today. It just goes to show that practice of the techniques LL has shown me is starting to become more natural. I know that I don’t have to be perfect on my behaviour around food 100% of the time in order to remain slim. As I get more and more skilled at the techniques my odds are increasing all the time and I am delighted.


Late afternoon was easier as I took my daughter to her swimming lesson and so was out of the house. I can’t over eat if I don’t have access to food and my mind was on my daughter’s progress so the thoughts of wanting to over eat were not there anyway. I then came home and had ¾ hour at home to make hubby and daughter's dinners and eat the tandoori chicken quarter (chicken quarter marinated in lemon juice and then natural yoghurt, tandoori spice, powdered ginger, minced garlic and then backed in the oven) I had baked in the oven whilst I was out at swimming, I had nothing with it though which was wasn't ideal but I just didn’t have the time before I had to leave to see my LL counsellor at 7pm. I couldn’t get to the meeting this morning because I was horse riding so hence the pop in this evening which got me out of the house again and made that bit of the day easy too. I then went round my dad’s house as our German friends were over for 3 days and I can’t see them tomorrow as I am off to see Tom Jones at Bournemouth. I had a plum when I left dad’s on my way to Asda and when I got home I had some frozen mixed summer berries blitzed up with natural yoghurt and a bit of sweetener which made frozen yoghurt and was to die for! I forgot to have my last LL pack and by the time I remebered it was too late even for me to be eating, plus I was more than satisfied after the homemade frozen yohurt!

Morning weight: 10st 7.8lbs for the 5th day running.
Activity: ¾ hour horse riding.
Water: 4 litres
Toning: none
I completed the LL homework: diary but nothing extra
I stuck to the listed food and quantity: forgot to have last bar.
Weight: Officially 10st 11.2lbs but didn't get weighed this week.
Day 17 of the route to management completed.
 
Wednesday 10th October

I was happy with this morning’s weigh in of 10st 7.2lbs and even happier that today was Tom Jones day!!!!

Hubby bought me tickets for centre front for my Birthday at about the same time as I started LL and I joked back then that I would be throwing my unwanted big pants on the stage. It all seems so long ago but it was only the last week of May. So much has changed in such a short time. For a start I went to see Tom Jones in size 10 trousers (a massive size 10 I grant you but a size 10 none the less) instead of size 24’s.

I ate breakfast with my daughter sat at the table listening to the radio. Breakfast was LL chocolate sachet made into porridge with psyllium husks. Despite a busy morning and afternoon at home I was preoccupied with food still, but not enough to cause problems. I decided to eat out with my friend in Bournemouth before seeing Tom, this was to be the first time I had eaten out in 5 months so it was to be quite a landmark moment and would be lovely to share it with one of my oldest friends. I consciously made the decision to make the best choices possible according to the LL management programme but decided that if I couldn’t eat exactly according to the plan then I would choose the best thing I could to limit the potential damage. I would be mindful of falling into the trap of using this as an excuse to break the diet though and so had to be on my guard. My friend as always will be very supportive. I had my main protein mean of the usual salad bits and grilled steak at lunchtime and then had a snack of a SF yoghurt topped with yoghurt and cinnamon and ½ an apple to stop me being so hungry and open to temptation when we reached the restaurant.

Later on:
I’m just back from seeing Tom Jones and had an absolutely amazing evening. He was brilliant and I wiggled in my chair and then danced and bounced about without getting remotely out of breath. The wonderful feeling about tonight was that my hips were nowhere near to touching the sides of the chair and it felt like I was sat in a throne as a result! What a far cry from the old days when I was uncomfortable because there wasn’t enough room.

We had dinner in Bournemouth. I had orange and pineapple juice to drink now that I am allowed fruit juices although I had 2 pints in total which was well over the top and a starter of chicken and chorizo skewers with a rocket salad drizzled with balsamic reduction. I should have then cancelled the main course because that was enough but I didn’t. There was some creamy dip (sour cream I think) to go with the skewers and I only had about a teaspoon of the big pot on my plate and didn’t feel deprived because I didn’t really want it. This is quite a turn around as the dip would have been the bit that made the meal for me before LL. Main course was grilled salmon on a bed of sugar snap peas, asparagus and wilted spinach which was to die for although I had to leave some as I was feeling very uncomfortable by then. This veg wasn’t on my diet plan and the veg was cooked which isn’t on my plan until Saturday. Not only that but there was too much of it and altogether I had 3 portions of protein today instead of the 1 I should have stuck at. I made the conscious decision to have an Irish coffee to finish off the meal and it was delicious.

All in all I am happy with the choices I made because I didn’t have any potatoes, bread, rice etc and stuck to protein and veg or salad which is quite a result as this is what I had planed to try to do. What I had wasn’t according to the diet plan but was pretty good on the whole and looking back I don’t regret having any of it which is the main thing. I take away from today the lesson of leaving even good food cooked by somebody else because it isn’t fun feeling uncomfortable through eating too much, even if the food is amazing. In fact, over eating mars the dinner. I need to remember this for the future. I didn’t have my second food pack and am going to have to watch myself over the next couple of days to make up for the choices I made this evening.

I am really pleased with the way my day went. It was amazing!

Morning weight: 10st 7.2lbs.
Activity: walked to and from school and round Bournemouth.
Water: 5 litres but mainly drunk in the morning and early afternoon in preparation for the car journey.
Toning: none
I completed the LL homework: Diary but nothing more
I stuck to the listed food and quantity: No because I had 3 protein portions instead of 1, ate cooked veg and far too much of it and didn’t have my LL bar.
Weight: Officially 10st 11.2lbs
Day 18 of the route to management completed.
 
Wow, Chicken; sounds like your day was quite a milestone one. What with struggling to find the sides of the seat, eating out and best of all finally finding a way to rid yourself of those big pants!!!!!!:eek: Did you actually throw a pair????

Seriously though, I'm glad you had a great day and well done on staying so controlled around food. You are inspiring.
 
What! What! You came to Bournemouth without coming to visit me :eek: What were you thinking ;)

My son's friend went to that concert last night. Didn't think a 14year old boy would want to go to that, but he was dead excited.:confused:

My son said "Oh yes......Tom Jones is a legend!"

:eek:

So did you walk along the seafront? It's lovely :)
 
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