Sarah's Slimming World Diary!
- Thread starter xsarahx
- Start date
xsarahx
Gold Member
Right... Little catch up!
Been a manic week really. Me and Dave are still talking every day. He texts me in the morning still to say he hopes I have a good day etc, and we talk on FaceTime at night... Usually for a good 30-60 mins.
I spent the whole weekend at the beach with my brother and was ok... Still sad but managed not to cry! Had a chat on Sunday with Dave and then cried again... Think it was the weekends emotions building up and knowing I had to go back to uni on Monday.
My brother came back to uni with me as he has the week off. I'm meant to be working all week but we are moving offices and its taking the movers longer than expected. So ive worked Monday morning and don't have to go back in until Friday! And then Friday is my last day... Full pay for the week. It's ideal!
So me and my brother just went to the beach the whole time really. I chatted to I'm a lot about the Dave situation. It made me think a lot and I think maybe I am meant to be with someone different. I am really adventurous and love travelling and doing new things. Dave says he wants to be like that, but it's just not him. He plays things a lot more safe. In e future, I want a camper an, I want to go away in my holidays to really random, exotic places with my children and he would find that hell. It just got me thinking that maybe we are different in that way... Which is quite important to me. Although... We were amazingly happy still.
I definitely love him, although we had definitely lost the excitement - I didn't get that huge excitement when I saw him anymore. Having never had an argument or even a cross word, I think maybe we have such an amazing friendship that it got in the way of our relationship? I don't know if that even makes sense written down?!
Anyway... Sort of it is that I am feeling a lot more positive. We both said that we could have easily still spent our lives together, we are so happy with each other... But there is just something missing.
I don't know how I feel still... I love him deeply and think the saddest thing is that one day we won't be able to be such close friends as we are now. However, we are still going to Amsterdam, hopefully still going tomSpain (assuming Amsterdam goes well!), we have lots of things we want to do over the Summer and have both said that with such a strong friendship underneath our relationship, that it is definitely worth saving.
So... Relationship wise I am single. Will spend some good times with him over the summer and see what happens I suppose.
Diet wise... I lost a stone last week and have managed to only put 2lb back on since eating properly which I think is pretty good! Thought it would pile right back on so I have been eating gradually.
As I'm moving out on Sunday I have just got healthy food in and have it all planned out so hopefully this weight will shift!
Should be easier to be healthy at home with my family to work out with - everyone is really active. Just going to concentrate on myself for a while.
Hope everyone is well xxx
Been a manic week really. Me and Dave are still talking every day. He texts me in the morning still to say he hopes I have a good day etc, and we talk on FaceTime at night... Usually for a good 30-60 mins.
I spent the whole weekend at the beach with my brother and was ok... Still sad but managed not to cry! Had a chat on Sunday with Dave and then cried again... Think it was the weekends emotions building up and knowing I had to go back to uni on Monday.
My brother came back to uni with me as he has the week off. I'm meant to be working all week but we are moving offices and its taking the movers longer than expected. So ive worked Monday morning and don't have to go back in until Friday! And then Friday is my last day... Full pay for the week. It's ideal!
So me and my brother just went to the beach the whole time really. I chatted to I'm a lot about the Dave situation. It made me think a lot and I think maybe I am meant to be with someone different. I am really adventurous and love travelling and doing new things. Dave says he wants to be like that, but it's just not him. He plays things a lot more safe. In e future, I want a camper an, I want to go away in my holidays to really random, exotic places with my children and he would find that hell. It just got me thinking that maybe we are different in that way... Which is quite important to me. Although... We were amazingly happy still.
I definitely love him, although we had definitely lost the excitement - I didn't get that huge excitement when I saw him anymore. Having never had an argument or even a cross word, I think maybe we have such an amazing friendship that it got in the way of our relationship? I don't know if that even makes sense written down?!
Anyway... Sort of it is that I am feeling a lot more positive. We both said that we could have easily still spent our lives together, we are so happy with each other... But there is just something missing.
I don't know how I feel still... I love him deeply and think the saddest thing is that one day we won't be able to be such close friends as we are now. However, we are still going to Amsterdam, hopefully still going tomSpain (assuming Amsterdam goes well!), we have lots of things we want to do over the Summer and have both said that with such a strong friendship underneath our relationship, that it is definitely worth saving.
So... Relationship wise I am single. Will spend some good times with him over the summer and see what happens I suppose.
Diet wise... I lost a stone last week and have managed to only put 2lb back on since eating properly which I think is pretty good! Thought it would pile right back on so I have been eating gradually.
As I'm moving out on Sunday I have just got healthy food in and have it all planned out so hopefully this weight will shift!
Should be easier to be healthy at home with my family to work out with - everyone is really active. Just going to concentrate on myself for a while.
Hope everyone is well xxx
xsarahx
Gold Member
So much for being positive... Just had a mega meltdown!
Today was the first time I've really been on my own with time to think - I've been surrounding myself with people otherwise! I chatted to a friend about the situation on the phone and she was convinced that he is just confused between the love/comfort type thing.
I called Dave to chat about it and asked him about it... Don't know why I did as I've asked him a million times already! I said its unfair for me to have had everything just taken away from me and have no reason for it. He has said that he wishes he cold give me a reason and that he would love to have a reason for himself, but he just gradually felt that he didn't love me anymore.
Such a horrible thing to have to hear...not sure why I keep putting myself in a situation where he has to say it!
Hoping ill feel ok tomorrow and that today is just a bop because it was my first time on my own.
Today was the first time I've really been on my own with time to think - I've been surrounding myself with people otherwise! I chatted to a friend about the situation on the phone and she was convinced that he is just confused between the love/comfort type thing.
I called Dave to chat about it and asked him about it... Don't know why I did as I've asked him a million times already! I said its unfair for me to have had everything just taken away from me and have no reason for it. He has said that he wishes he cold give me a reason and that he would love to have a reason for himself, but he just gradually felt that he didn't love me anymore.
Such a horrible thing to have to hear...not sure why I keep putting myself in a situation where he has to say it!
Hoping ill feel ok tomorrow and that today is just a bop because it was my first time on my own.
xsarahx
Gold Member
Trying to be more positive today. It's difficult!
I did a kettlebell workout yesterday and then another cardio one... I like how I'm turning to exercise as a distraction.
Today I've had a nice lie in, done a 25 min workout and cleaned the bathroom. Got a lot of cleaning to do before I move out on Sunday.
I did a kettlebell workout yesterday and then another cardio one... I like how I'm turning to exercise as a distraction.
Today I've had a nice lie in, done a 25 min workout and cleaned the bathroom. Got a lot of cleaning to do before I move out on Sunday.
xsarahx
Gold Member
Quick update. Turns out there is someone at school that Dave likes - a teaching assistant. He showed me his phone and she has been texting him a fair bit. He has been replying - this is whilst we were together. He doesn't seem to think there is anything wrong with that. I definitely do! His texts were just friendly... But I don't see the need for her to text him asking ow his weekend is, and saying she is so tired after her weekend that she needs a shower and massage?! Inappropriate I think.
Anyway, he says she is nothing to do with why he has ended things - it was fancying her that made him realise he wasn't in love with me anymore, although he hasn't ended things so they can be together.
I don't know how everything got so complicated!? We always had such an easy, amazing, happy relationship so this is so weird.
Anyway... I've now lost 17lb in two weeks so that's the only good thing out of this!
I'm not dieting, just not very hungry and when I am eating its generally very healthy.
Me and him are still off to Amsterdam on Wednesday. He said he likes this girl but he needs to get over me still and wants a friendship with me and so we are working on that. We'll see though... Men can be funny cant they.
Anyway, he says she is nothing to do with why he has ended things - it was fancying her that made him realise he wasn't in love with me anymore, although he hasn't ended things so they can be together.
I don't know how everything got so complicated!? We always had such an easy, amazing, happy relationship so this is so weird.
Anyway... I've now lost 17lb in two weeks so that's the only good thing out of this!
I'm not dieting, just not very hungry and when I am eating its generally very healthy.
Me and him are still off to Amsterdam on Wednesday. He said he likes this girl but he needs to get over me still and wants a friendship with me and so we are working on that. We'll see though... Men can be funny cant they.
EmmaB
Silver Member
Sorry that everything is a bit **** with you and Dave. Not sure wether I hope he realises the grass isn't greener, or wether you realise your not perfect for each other. Wish I could help out.
Glad that your going to Amsterdam, hope you have lots of fun!!
Well done on your massive loss chick! Are you feeling good from it? Xx
Glad that your going to Amsterdam, hope you have lots of fun!!
Well done on your massive loss chick! Are you feeling good from it? Xx
xsarahx
Gold Member
Not off to Amsterdam after all. He hurt his foot last week quite badly and then fell on it again in Monday. Really swollen, damaged the Achilles and ankle so he said he couldn't go. I tried my hardest to come up with things we could do there with a bad ankle but he said its prob a good thing as his family all think it is a bad idea anyway. Annoyed that he listened to his family when they know nothing about our relationship.
Oh well! So Amsterdam is off. I said we may as well cancel Spain now then as its not going to be any more of a good idea then than now so that's cancelled too. He is giving me all of the money I spent luckily.
Seeing him on Saturday to do something nice hopefully.
Oh well! So Amsterdam is off. I said we may as well cancel Spain now then as its not going to be any more of a good idea then than now so that's cancelled too. He is giving me all of the money I spent luckily.
Seeing him on Saturday to do something nice hopefully.
xsarahx
Gold Member
Quick update...
Saw him Saturday and had a really good day actually. Proved to ourselves that we can have so much fun together, without arguing etc! He took me bowling and for dinner for my birthday and we hung out at the beach most of the day just chatting.
Sunday was my birthday so had a nice day then.
Just started working at a summer camp at my old placement school which is fun. It's where I met dave though so lots of kids asking of we are married yet etc! Bit hard.
My granny had a stroke yesterday so she is in hospital. It was a severe one but luckily she doesn't need surgery. Really hope she is ok... Spent a couple of hours with her last night whilst she slept.
Life's just too much at the moment... One thing after another.
Still losing weight... 19lb off in 3 weeks now... Down to 14.6.... Didn't see that happening!
Saw him Saturday and had a really good day actually. Proved to ourselves that we can have so much fun together, without arguing etc! He took me bowling and for dinner for my birthday and we hung out at the beach most of the day just chatting.
Sunday was my birthday so had a nice day then.
Just started working at a summer camp at my old placement school which is fun. It's where I met dave though so lots of kids asking of we are married yet etc! Bit hard.
My granny had a stroke yesterday so she is in hospital. It was a severe one but luckily she doesn't need surgery. Really hope she is ok... Spent a couple of hours with her last night whilst she slept.
Life's just too much at the moment... One thing after another.
Still losing weight... 19lb off in 3 weeks now... Down to 14.6.... Didn't see that happening!
xsarahx
Gold Member
Sorry I've not been around. My Granny got a lot worse, got pneumonia and passed away on Monday morning. I was with her the last 48 hours, couldn't bear to leave her and he passed away at 12:45am with my Mum and I cuddling her. The most horrendous, sad thing I have been through in my life.
I'm in a bit of a numb state at the moment and almost waiting for the funeral on Wednesday when it is all going to really hit me.
Hope everyone is ok.
I'm in a bit of a numb state at the moment and almost waiting for the funeral on Wednesday when it is all going to really hit me.
Hope everyone is ok.
lindseydodd408
Gold Member
I got excited because I found an old mini friend... then I read what's been happening and I feel sad... hope you are doing ok? Xxx
