Surfhunny's Countdown to Florida

[Surfhunny]

Thanks hun, lol I do it every time!!! I've figured out it's because I want to stuff as much as I can in before I go back on the diet again! I guess it's twisted logic but that's how I think... I'm going to have to get a grip on that, but at least I've identified it now

 

[great things]

i did that between stopping ww and starting cd. thursday and sunday. i tried to eat as much as i could cram in. i tend to have a small splurge after weigh in.

mind again my weight is going up and staying up and not moving!

off to docs tomorrow get full bloods done see if i'm ok in all aspects.

 

[lyndzi76]

Haven't heard off you for a while, hope you ok.
x x

 

[cornishkez]

Sal you're being as vacant as me! lol. How you getting on? You back on it tomorrow? I'm back on it today, so we'll be miserable together.

 

[Surfhunny]

Hey hun yeah I've been very vacant!!! I can't wait to get back on it tomorrow, I have stuffed my face for a week and feel fat and gross now. But never mind, I know when enough is enough and I'm glad to be able to get back on CD.

I've found that even with the price increase it's still cheaper for me to do CD than eat normally, the advantage of being single I guess.

So anyway here's the plan.....it's 6 weeks until my annual leave, so I'm planning on doing SS for 6 weeks. I feel like I need an end point, and 6 weeks doesn't seem too horrific!! So I hope I can do it, and if I do I might even get to target before the 6 weeks are up.... No pressure, no promises!

I'm actually really scared to go on the scales so I'm going to ask my CDC not to tell me my weight, from now on it's just going to be lbs lost, not my actual weight. Hopefully that will also stop me from being fixated on getting into the 12's.

Good luck Kerry, once we get through these next couple of days it'll be plain sailing again I'm sure!!!! Xxx

 

[cornishkez]

Good to see you back, I'm struggling here. Day 1 and I have been fine all day, but feeling hungry now. Going to watch the rest of BB then go to bed before I do any damage. I know I have hash browns and bacon in the freezer, my fav!

I feel horrible as well, I have been eating for the sake of it and I have actually missed that feeling of waking up with an empty belly. I feel bloated and stuffed and constipated and I feel FAT! I mean, I know I am, but I feel like I've got this massive double chin and spilling over my trousers and I have been so out of breath the last couple of days!

 

[Surfhunny]

Me too!!! I feel exactly the same, out of breath and everything, but I've decided that this is a good thing because last time I felt this way I was pushing 18 st so the fact that I feel grim now means my tolerance has dropped right down, either that or I've put on 5st on a week lol!

And for both of us it's a positive thing, we've realised we've gone too far and can pull it back before permanent damage is done right? I know we can both do this and we'll get there!!! You need to ignore the hash browns and bacon and I need to ignore the mini magnums... Infact I'm going to go and bin them now so they can't tempt me.... Yet another advantage of living alone I guess. We can do this!!! Xxx

 

[great things]

Hi surf and kez

Glad you are both back. You'll be fine. Been pretty dire myself this weekend with wine and salty foods. Back to it tomorrow.

 

[Surfhunny]

Hiya Nikki how're you? Have you heard back from the docs yet about your bloods? Hopefully theyllnhave some answers for you! I seriously can't wait to get back onto it tomorrow, just not looking forward to the nosey parkers at work who seem to have made it their mission to interrogate me over everything that goes into my mouth, diet or not. I'm so sick of the comments that I've actually started to snap at them and that's not like me at all. I can't bear it, it's the only thing I'm not looking forward to. My friends just accept what I'm doing and don't question it, but there's a couple of people at work who seem to think they have the right to comment on my eating habits.

Anyway that's not going to put me off but I wish they'd just mind their own business!

 

[Surfhunny]

Okay Day 1 here goes!!! Wish me luck, 6 weeks to go!

 

[*Shanny*]

Good Luck Sal 6 weeks can be done, your goal weight is waiting for you now.!!! 'Go get Sal'.!!
xx

 

[cornishkez]

Good Luck! I'm with ya!

 

[Surfhunny]

Thanks, so far so good, I've made it through day 1 with no problems and no temptation, even though someone had brought in a huge box of chocs, it didn't even appeal to me. There's only been one point today where I've felt like I wanted food and that was when I got in from work and I know that's purely from habit... This last week and in the past, I get my tea when I get home from work so I had a bit of a moment where I looked in the fridge for a while, saw it empty and had a bar.

I think the bar was a mistake though, it didn't satisfy me and left me wanting more, so I had more water and the feeling passed. I've just watched Supersize vs Superskinny I recorded the other day, and now Biggest Loser is on so it's helping to keep me focussed.

I hate starting diets on a Monday because I feel like it's a bit of a cliche but I'm ready and I've had to before this rest week becomes a rest month and a rest year and I become a great big fatty!!!

Only 41 days left to go!

 

[Surfhunny]

40 Days left to go!!! I've never tried this approach before but I actually quite like it!! It helps me stay positive, seeing the days decrease. I know its probably just another plan to succeed but I really hope this one works, I need this journey to be over soon.

I need to be able to maintain for a couple of months before I go to Vegas or I'll be back to where I am now when I come back from 2 weeks in the US. I need to know I'm capable of making the right choices while I'm away. And the only way I'm going to be able to do that is to have been in maintainance for a good while before I go. If I don't I'll go on a big binge, I know myself too well!

So another day down, dreaded WI tomorrow, but it's still going to be a no weight mentioned WI, I don't want anything to derail me, and I think if I find out exactly how much I've put on I'll be too disheartened to continue.

 

[Surfhunny]

Good news, I'm in ketosis already, that was fast!!! I'm glad because it'll mean I'm less tempted to cheat now, I want to stay in the pink no matter what!!

 

[Surfhunny]

Humph, the only space to sit in the staffroom at lunch is next to Tactless Tessie, she always makes me feel so self-conscious about my dietary habits!! So yet again I've had to face an interrogation about my diet. Grrr!!! Never mind she goes off on maternity leave on Friday yay, I won't miss the comments at all!!!!!!!

Anyway so far so good as far as day 3 goes, I haven't had nearly enough water though, I've been in theatre all morning, so I haven't dared drink much cos I can't just nip out to the loo. So only 39 and a half days to go!!

 

[Surfhunny]

Well this has been my first WI where I have no idea what the outcome was, and it feels really really strange. I don't know what the damage is from last week, couldn't even tell from my CDC's face. I've asked her not to tell me until I'm into the 12's, so she's going to tell me my losses and that's it. But it feels sooo strange.

I don't know if it's a bit liberating, or plain scarey, but either way I feel like I might be making progress.... I hope!!!

 

[Surfhunny]

Boo I'm feeling pretty lonely here on my diary at the moment :cry: ...... never mind, it's still helping me to get things out of my head.siholog:

 

[lyndzi76]

Hello, That's a great way to loose weigh. I always let the scales rule my mood and eating habits. Good luck x x

 

[Surfhunny]

Hiya Lyndzi, how're you getting on hun? I'm still not sure about this not knowing how much I weigh business. I can feel myself slipping a bit...I feel like because I don't know the numbers I'm becoming less bothered about what I'm doing.... :sigh:

I don't know if it's just because I've had a really rough day, but I've slipped up :break_diet:...I've had fish fingers for tea. I don't know why I did it really. Maybe I do need to know how much I weigh, to shock myself into being good again...... Argh I don't know what to do. I might have to see how I feel tomorrow. I need to stay motivated and I think I might need a fright to motivate me again.

Last night I had horrendous cramp in my calf, it was aweful, when I stretched it out I got cramp in the front of my leg. I used to get cramps like this when I was a younger, because I had a salt deficiency due to the amount of exercise I did in the heat, but I shouldn't be now. Oh well, just something else to deal with right now.

Today has been really horrible at work, I started at 8am (wasn't due to start until 9) and worked through until 8.30pm. Been on my feet all day and had really stressful cases to deal with, very poorly patients To top it all off the builders were laying vinyl flooring in the room next door and the fumes from the adhesive were being pumped into our room through the air con. My chest is still painful and I've got a sore throat. The builders were all fine in their respirators though. I think all this is partly why I automatically reached for the fish fingers when I got home, a quick fix tea, forgetting I'm back on CD. I'm my own worst enemy

I wish I could just pull myself together and get on with it for the last 6 weeks. It's not long in the scheme of things at all, and yet it still feels like forever to me... I can't help but have this feeling of gloom and I feel like such a failure for not being able to get this last damn stone off. Maybe I'm just destined to be fat forever. :sigh: I feel really down about it all, I know quite a few people are going throught the same thing at the moment too. I wish I could get out of this mood. Aaaaaaaaaaaarrrrrrrrrrrrggggggggggghhhhhhhhhh :cry::cry::cry::cry::cry::cry::cry: