The fat is back

<singing> B....M....I.... 29.1, BYE...OH...BYE....O..BE...SITY!!

I will write more later, am really shattered at the moment, haven't been sleooing well the past few nights, feeling a little stressed about tomorrows's huge Winter Party.

Mwwwaaahhhh!!!!
 
wow!!! what a fab loss this week, paula!!!!!
im soo made up for you!
im still a bit jealous of you all for being able to do CD/SS...
especially with these fab losses!
i know i'm in a different situation and im trying for a baby and all that...but not a day goes by that its a challenge for me
to NOT pick, graze, eat the house down, etc.

oh its tough.

i am sooo pleased at how well you've done so far. you'll have the rest off in asbo-lutely no time at all. ((lol)) i say asbo there, just preparing you for the wonderful world of the UK. hahaha

have a wonderful time at the winter party!
i'll catch up with you again soon.
ciao!
 
I should be feeling really happy. Had a great loss this week, met another of my Christmas mini-goals, Christmas is around the corner and I break up for a three week holiday from work in a week. But, I'm not feeling so great. I'm actually feeling very, very stressed, the majority of the reason being the Winter Party that we have this evening. It's the biggest event of our school year. There are more than 500 guests coming and all of the children are putting on a performance. I've been organising them for the past 5 years, and every year they get bigger and more 'important'. Many of our families are of the VIP kind - film stars, heads of state - we even have the grandchildren of the vice-premier of China, so these events can be a little daunting. None of this is diet-related, sorry! But I feel that CD is a big part of my life, a change to my life and a time where I'm more true to myself.

The problem is, last year I was so upset with the way things turned out - most of the parents were delighted, but I wasn't! I felt that I was expected to run the whole show and that my teachers and assistants had abondoned me. I was very angry with the whole staff and the whole atmosphere after last years party was very ...well...down to say the least. I am so afraid that similar things will happen this year, and my little pep talk on Friday of 'as long as we go into this with positivity in our hearts, everything will go fine' was more for myself than anyone else.

I'm gonna go and get a massage in a few minutes to try and iron out some of those stress knots!

The second not so happy thing is really, very silly and very foolish! One of my Christmas goals is to get to a size 18. I have no clothes that fit me at the moment and the size 20 trousers that I have been wearing are so big on me that I was secretly believing that I had gone past size 18 and would actually be fitting into a size 16 when I went home. I went to a 'big size shop' yesterday to buy something to wear this evening. I tried quite a few of pairs of trousers and skirts on, and it is official, I am a size....18. I know, I should be delighted, I've gone from a size 24 to size 18 in less than 3 months, but...well, there should be no buts!!!

I eventually bought a pair of velvet, chocolate trousers (Marks and Spencers would you believe - size 18!) and a velvet, chocolate vest top with embroidery and metal sequins. Looks very nice and really quite slimming but the top is a little - revealing! I popped into Etam on my way back, really didn't think anything would fit me (biggest size is Asian size 14). But there was a really funky, gold, stretchy top with open shoulders and open back (with vest under it). It's not as flattering as the vest top, which shows off my assets (;)). Gold, shiny stuff (especially when it's a size 14!) is usually not so flattering as it tends to enhance the bumps that you don't need enhanced! But I still think I'm gonna go with the gold, it's a little more...well...presentable....for a family do!


OK, gonna go for a massage, and then I need to start getting ready as I need to leave at 2pm. Wish me luck and a good nights sleep tonight!
 
Hi Paula

Your life sounds so amazing!!! And i love your nick name too lol. Not for much longer though hey? Your weight losses are fab!

I hope the party went well, i'm sure it did!

Looking forward to hearing all about it...
 
The Party was fabulous!
The worry was necessary as it made me make sure that everything was organised to a T. The ballroom was spectacular, the stage, the lighting, the sound, the kids....everything was fabulous. And the whole great feeling was magnified by a 1000 by the million and one compliments that I got!

I arrived early to make sure that all the hotel preparation was going fine, and, about an hour later the teachers started filing in....three teachers walked straight passed me without even a side glance asking others, 'Have you seen Paula?' Wow, I see these guys every day and when they did turn and see me, the reaction was enough to keep a huge smile on my face for the rest of the evening!

So many parents and teacher's partners paid compliments. When I got up on the stage for my opening speech, one family even called my assistant, and asked 'who's that woman, and where is Paula?' Annie, my assistant giggled and said, 'that's Paula' and the mum came running up to the stage to check whether it really was me! Mmmmmm....a very nice feeling!!!!


5 more sleeps to go before we head home, to what my Mammy says is a very wet Wales! It's absolutely freezing here and it snowed yesterday, but the sun is glorious! I hate the wet of Wales and I get really tired when I'm home, especially in the winter, as it's ALWAYS dark! I need my sunnied every day here! But I do miss home, the air is so much fresher and cleaner! I s'pose it gets washed every day!

Just realised that I met my 'fit into a size 18' goal as well, so all my Christmas challenges have been met. I think that my challenge for over Christmas is going to be to stay within 3kgs of 85.

Okeydokey....hope that all you lovely bunnies are having a fab week.

Love
 
Had a bit of a funny day today. Was in the car on my way to one of the schools when I felt really, really dizzy and sick. I thought it would pass but even after I got to the school, I still felt really dizzy. I left early today as I was getting a little worried. Have just had a veg soup and also ate some pak choy that hubby had cooked for his and Eiriana's dinner. Feel a little better now, but really guilty that I had the veg!

Have ss'ed 100% except for a couple of blips when I went home for nanny's funeral back in the first 3 weeks and a tiny bite of savoury pancake on my b'day, for a total of 84 days. I know that LL is ss for 100 days, but I've never had aam week with CD, does anyone know whether that can actually cause probs?

Anyhow, am sure no real probs!
 
It's Friday....I'm on HOLIDAYS!!!!!

Had a really lovely day today, really lovely holiday mood at school, even though I'm nipping off two days early and everyone has to go back to work on Monday and Tuesday! Lots of really lovely gifts off kids, teachers and assistants.....I LOVE CHRISTMAS!!!

Have a busy day tomorrow, still have a few things I need to buy before heading out on Monday. Then I need to pack everything. Actually, all the presents are in the suitcase, just our clothes to pack and I won't be taking many 'cos some serious shopping will be called for when I'm at home, and Eiriana won't need much as I know my family very well and she'll be kitted out in a whole new wardrobe too!!!


I'll be off to Church on Sunday morning to watch a play that the kids are putting on. I'm really looking forward to it! Then we're gonna have a little Christmas tea in the afternoon, invite a couple of people over and let Eiriana open her presents from us and people here then rather than dragging them home to be dragged back here again.

We'll be out of the house by 9 on MNonday morning, flights at 12 noon!

WONDERFUL, WONDERFUL, WONDERFUL!!!!

And to top it all off, the photographers who came to our party on Sunday brought some pics in yesterday. The one's of me are safely tucked in my bag along with a couple from last years Christmas party...and I'm showing them off to everyone...really the difference is huge, I wish I had an e-copy of last years! LOVING THIS!!!!
 
Weigh in this morning and another delight....another 2.2 kgs (4.8 lbs)!!!

Have been on CD for 3 months exactly today.
Started on 15th September at 108 kgs (237.6 lbs/1/2 lb off 17 stone :eek:)

15th December WI 82.2 KGS ) (180.84 LBS/ 1 LB off 13 stone

A total loss in 3 months of 25.8 kgs (56 lbs or 4 BLOODY STONE ....WOOOHOOOHOOOHOOO!!!!:D:D:D:D:D

Am more than a little delighted this morning!!!!
 
Woweeeeeee that's an absolutely amazing loss!!!!

I've only come across your diary in the past few days, but I have to say I have thoroughly enjoyed reading it.....not only is it highly inspirational, it's incredibly well written and therefore a bloody good read :D

I hope you have a fantastic trip home and a wonderful Christmas break (there are going to be flabbergasted faces when you arrive home ;)).

Cate xx
 
So, it's almost 9pm. Have had a lovely, but busy day. Need to hit the sack soon, but still have a few things to get ready before we set off in the morning. It's also just hit me that, as of tomorrow, I will be introducing food for a couple of weeks. I've just gone on to BA.COM and ordered myself a low-cal meal for the flight.

Wish me luck for my food intro...a couple of days ago I wrote that my New Years Challenge is to stay within 3kgs of 85kgs...but with my big loss this week, I'm changing this to not to go over 85kgs.

Am really looking forward to people's reaction, and have chosen my outfit for the flight, black leggings with knee high boots, chiffon silk long top and my new leather jacket.

Won't be posting so often when I'm at Mam and Dad's, but if I'm not back here by Jan 6th (fly back to BJ on Jan 4th), please, please, please message me, call me, skype me or get on a plane to Beijing and get me back SS!!

Love to you all. Wishing you a Merry, Merry Christmas and a fabulous New Year!!!
 
wooooww!!! paula!! ive just read through your diary over the last week and i can only say that im soooooo very impressed with you! im in awe of your incredible losses and determination. you know you've done very well so far. ;)

im sorry i havent been here for you, to celebrate the losses with you, etc. ((as posted in my diary today, i've been up to my ears in flour, butter, eggs, etc..baking away!!))

i know yo uare heading for good ole sunny wales at the moment. but i hope that you will check this before xmas! i wish i could see the reaction on your family's face when they see you!!! ((its something im looking forward to once i get back on it and lose the pregnancy weight...should i ever concieve!)) hehehe. i know i will. but im just not focusing on it enough, im not putting my mind into the rght relaxation/meditation mode like i did when trying for fynn. i know you totally understand what i mean here.

anyways, my tesco delivery is pullling into the drive so i should end this here.
before i forget, you have had an awesome loss this last week!!! you have got to be soooooo made up withyourself.!!!

have safe travels and a beautiful xmas with your family & friends!!!
xoxo ciao for now!

annnnywaaaays!
my hubby has just signed us up on skype so i will have to arrange a call with you at some point when you get home! woohoo. oh and thanks for the message on FB, as well! i do think of the well being of you and sam all the time. In my thoughts, but i cant
 
I'm back in the Jing!
Have had a fabulous Christmas at home in Wales. Mam and Dad are doing very well and we had a really lovely time catching up and partying!

Had a great time going out with friends too...had the best night out dancing with this new found confidence I have......rather smug in the knowledge that I could've pulled a hundred times over:p!!!!

I had a great first week kind of 790'ing, but along came the parties!!!! Day before Christmas Eve, we had a big family party, I actually took it pretty easy that day, had a little more than I had originally thought I would, but my 'light meals' and 'non-snacking' ended promptly on Boxing Day. I got myself into the mentality that 'oh well, I'll be back on CD in a week or so, so what the hell'. I'm trying to persuade myself that it was Christmas and that was my excuse, but inside, I'm terrified that I'll always have this 'gorge myself now and thinking of the consequences later' mentality!

Anyway, got back to Beijing yesterday, 4 suitcases of Christmas Pressies and...of course....new clothes for me!!! (I was actually really refrained, went into Cardiff for the day, Xiao Zhou said that he'd like to come with me....he had a little shock, everytime we've ever gone in the past, we've stopped off at Evan's, M+S's, and maybe a book shop or two!!!! We hardly made it to half of the shops and only got as far as Dorothy Perkins before all the shops closed! Didn't buy so much though, but had a helluva lot of fun trying it all on!)


Well, here's for the damage.......actually really, really surprised and incredibly happy,

Weigh in January 5th - 83.6 KGs
Christmas Gain - 1.4 KGs or 3.08 lbs

Not too bad at all for a week of chips and choc!!!!


Actually, really found my weakness on this holiday...I could go without choc any day, my weakness lies with crisps, sandwiches and cracker nibbles....ah well.....


Anyway, I'm hoping for the Christmas gain to be off within this week.

I'll post more later, it's 1:30pm now and we've all only just got up, and I really need a shower!!!:eek:
 
Have just eaten 3 slices of my daughter's pizza hut cheese sticks.....really hope that this isn't gonna be the habit....:(....feeling very disappointed with myself, but reasoned that I'm not in ketosis yert, so, it wouldn't hurt....aaaggghhhh!!!!!
 
I can't believe how bloody ravenous I am....I'M ABSOLUTELY STARVING!!!!!


Horrendous headache too and absolutely and utterly shattered....did I also mention that I'M FREAKING HUNGRY?!!!!!:eat::ignore::eatdrink023:

I don't remember being this hungry first time around, but then again, I hadn't been feasting on chips from Caroline Street (South Waleans will know!) and party pack pretzels for days before starting last time around!!!!


Really bloody jet-lagged too, 2 hours sleep last night, 4 the night before. Trying to stay awake 'til gone 9 so that I can sleep the whole night, but not sure whether that's gonna happen! Really, really busy at work today too....thought the first day back would be a breeze, but...of course it never works out like that!!!! Good day though, everyone seemed o be really happy to get back!!! (Crazy buggers!!!!)

So, I'm on my 4th day of ss except for my blip on Saturday night, so, oh sh*t, I'm only really on my second day...2 more to go:cry:

Ketosis, please come tomorrow, please, please, please:help2:


Brain won't function any longer so I'm gonna go now

:needhug:
 
Hi Paula, First of all,you look GREAT ( I think I never mention that whenever we met at the playground) ,If you are wondering who this is.....It's Claudia. I am on day 11 of CD, and doing alright....... Just keep going,you can do it...........if you need to talk to distract yourself give me a call.
 
Hi Claudia!
Go girl, 4.5kgs already!!! Hope that you are feeling good. Spoke to Cynara today and she said she felt great.

I think that I'll be OK. Wanted to wait to have dinner with hubby and Eiriana so feeling soooo hungry. Nearly blipped with an orange just now, but don't want to put myself back to square one again. I even felt really shaky before my soup earlier :cry::cry::cry:

Think I'm gonna have a hot bath and relax in a while.

How are you doing, are you keeping a diary on here? The same to you too, if you need a distraction give me a call. This place is actually fabulous for support, distraction and any answers to questions you will most definately have.

Chat soon
 
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