ProPoints Tinyshoes hoping for a slimmer/happier future!

[bulldogdaisy]

Thanks (again) I just start to lose motivation when I know I've refused 'naughty' food only to sts grrr! I kind of 'enjoyed' (as much as I can ever enjoy exercise!) Zumba when I went but used to go with a friend, I'm shy so find it hard to go into places on my own, I'm a bit pathetic in that way lol.

You're not pathetic, I first went with a neighbour as it is hard walking through those doors on our own.sts always seems worse if been extra good,it will probably show next week instead.

 

[bulldogdaisy]

Monday 26th March
Well what can I say? Friday night was a disaster lol, have had the Easter Eggs in the house for a good few weeks now but I caved and ate one, tut tut smacked bum!! So after that I decided I will start my weeklies from WI day which is Friday and then if I am extra bad at the weekend I will HAVE to be extra good Mon - Thurs to claw it back lol. So Friday I ate 20 weeklies , Saturday I ate 9, and Sunday I ate 9, so that leaves me with 11 weeklies to last til Thursday night! GOT TO STOP EMOTIONAL LONELINESS EATING!! AAAAARRRRGGGHHHH! Oops sorry for shouting but honestly I get so mad with myself sometimes. Don't think the sts on Friday helped my mood either, but I need to get a life is my main problem!

Any hobbies you enjoy doing or friends local to spend time with if you're feeling lonely?good idea to change your weeklies around if it helps :0)

 

[tinyshoes]

Yea is so much harder when life throws the 'bad times' at us,easier to find comfort in crisps then a apple! Aw I do like some romance,maybe do what me and my OH did after we went through a rough patch - a little list of nice things to do for each other :0)

Aw that sounds like a good idea, only trouble is my hubby is a bit old fashioned, he thinks things like that are a waste of time and not necessary. He isn't one for talking about things, or admitting that things are difficult etc. He prefers to bury his head in the sand and carry on as if everything is ok. Even when we argue he never apologises, just carries on as if nothing has been said. Nice idea tho

You're not pathetic, I first went with a neighbour as it is hard walking through those doors on our own.sts always seems worse if been extra good,it will probably show next week instead.

Lol it might have shown if I hadn't eaten a whole Easter Egg on Friday night!! Grrrr, my own worst enemy. Just gonna be good the rest of this week and start again for next week!

Any hobbies you enjoy doing or friends local to spend time with if you're feeling lonely?good idea to change your weeklies around if it helps :0)

That's half my trouble I don't really have any hobbies! Used to work shifts so could never do anything 'regular' iykwim, and I seem to be so busy with housework/shopping/working full time/puppy etc I don't really know what I could do or when. I just feel lonely, even when hubby is in, don't know if that makes sense. He is the total opposite to me - has loads of hobbies, and his main one takes up ALOT of his time, it's something he has to do every day and through summer he is out Fri and Sat nights, and busy all day Sat! Guess after so many years of it it is starting to make me resent that we can't do much together all summer, then there is football all winter grrr. Anyway, thanks so much for reading and giving your advice/thoughts

 

[tinyshoes]

Tuesday 27th March
Did ok last night, was ironing for 2 hrs (booooo!), managed to have a low point day though. Will aim for another today!

Breakfast = 4
Oatso simple 3
Soya milk 1

Snack = 2
Alpen Light Choc n Fudge 2

Lunch = 8
2 x 50/50 crusts away bread 2
Rf tuna mayo filler 1
Sunbites 3
Mullerlight 2
Clementine 0

Snack = 1
SAJ 1
Pineapple 0

Dinner = 10
Birds Eye Reggae Reggae chicken fillet 4
200g wedges 5
30g WW cream mixed with chives 1
Rocket salad, cucumber, tomatoes 0

Supper = 2
Highlights 1
4 x Mikado 1

Total dailies used: 26/26
Total weeklies used: 1/9
Weeklies left: 8

Green Tea: Will try to have 1 cup today yuck!
Fruit/veg: Clementine, Rocket, Cucumber, Tomatoes, Pineapple

 

[bulldogdaisy]

That's half my trouble I don't really have any hobbies! Used to work shifts so could never do anything 'regular' iykwim, and I seem to be so busy with housework/shopping/working full time/puppy etc I don't really know what I could do or when. I just feel lonely, even when hubby is in, don't know if that makes sense. He is the total opposite to me - has loads of hobbies, and his main one takes up ALOT of his time, it's something he has to do every day and through summer he is out Fri and Sat nights, and busy all day Sat! Guess after so many years of it it is starting to make me resent that we can't do much together all summer, then there is football all winter grrr. Anyway, thanks so much for reading and giving your advice/thoughts

Hi there,I've been in the same boat as you,moved bout a hours car journey away from family and friends last year and OH moved in September with me,I felt like a spare wheel in my own home and the ps3 was his life,after many up and downs we are getting back on track and he makes more of a effort now,plus I now have a iPod touch which is my lifesaver lol maybe have a think bout what you would like to do,even if for a couple of hours a week,but yea things do tend to grate on us after a while.Thats ok bout the advice,hope I haven't sounded pushy,it is hard to explain in text sometimes.

 

[bulldogdaisy]

Boo indeed for ironing for two hours!!

 

[tinyshoes]

Hi there,I've been in the same boat as you,moved bout a hours car journey away from family and friends last year and OH moved in September with me,I felt like a spare wheel in my own home and the ps3 was his life,after many up and downs we are getting back on track and he makes more of a effort now,plus I now have a iPod touch which is my lifesaver lol maybe have a think bout what you would like to do,even if for a couple of hours a week,but yea things do tend to grate on us after a while.Thats ok bout the advice,hope I haven't sounded pushy,it is hard to explain in text sometimes.

Aw that must have been hard for you moving away from your family and friends. I'm lucky in that way, I see my mum and sister almost every week and can talk to them about my situation although I think they are getting fed up of hearing it now lol. As for friends I don't have many only a couple of close ones, and they are both currenlty in fairly new relationships and happy and loved up so I don't see alot of them now, plus they are so happy with their relationships I hate to talk about how unhappy I am in mine! Although they do know. Not to ask personal questions but why do you think your relationship improved, was there a 'turning point' or has it been gradual? A year ago I almost left my hubby, I found somewhere to live etc and was ready to go (after months of agonising over it/talking to him about being unhappy/what is missing for me etc) but when I finally plucked up the courage to tell him what I was thinking of doing, he broke down which is very unusual for him and said he realised he had been taking the mick the last few years and that he would try harder, so I decided to stay, but to be honest I can't see that anything has changed in that time. I have asked him time and time again whether there is anything I need to be better at for him, or to help him be more affectionate etc towards me (I know I'm in no way perfect either!) but he just says no and that he is ok with how things are. So am stuck really. I've tried being over affectionate with him hoping it would rub off on him a bit, have tried withdrawing my affection completely to see if he would notice, but nothing has made a difference. The only thing he notices missing is erm, well, bedroom affection. And that's how I have got to the point of feeling low, lonely, miserable, confused and overweight! Oops am so sorry this has turned into a right essay! It's just really nice to have someone else's perspective who isn't 'involved' sometimes. Anyway I'll leave it there lol.

 

[tinyshoes]

Wednesday 28th March
Managed to stay on track yesterday, went for a walk last night, not a long one, but a walk all the same lol. Stuck to low points too. Still not optimistic about losing anything this week either, but we will see. I just need to keep telling myself if I stick to it, eventually some weight will come off, no matter how slowly. Hoping to manage another low point day today although am feeling really hungry so far!!

Breakfast = 5
Choc Weetabix 4
Soya milk 1

Snack = 2
Cheddars 2

Lunch = 9
Mini wrap 3
Wafer thin chicken 1
WW cheese slice 1
Rocket salad 0
WW cheese puffs 2
Mullerlight Mango & Passionfruit 2
Clementine 0

Snack = 1
SAJ 1

Dinner = 13
WW spaghetti/meatballs meal 9
WW doughballs 4

20 minute walk

Supper = 1
Highlights 1

Total dailies used: 26/26
Total weeklies used: 5/8 oops
Weeklies left: 3
Green Tea: Gonna try for 2 cups today :jelous:
Fruit/veg: Clementine, rocket salad, stir fried veg, pineapple

 

[bulldogdaisy]

Sounds like you are doing well with your points and that's good you were able to go for a walk last night.As to me and my OH it got to a point where I had enough and he knew it! We did break up but he was still living with me till could find somewhere else to go,it shocked him that I 'meant it this time around' and something made him wake up and decide he wanted to fight for us,we had lots of long chats about what was wrong within the relationship and it's not 100% but it is sooo much better! I think emotions and eating often go hand in hand,I tried to lose weight a couple of times last year,we both managed to lose a couple of pounds before Christmas but I can only do this now cos i feel much better about us and myself.Im glad you have family to talk to,I vist mine often and they come here aswell,keep in touch with my friends but have felt lonely in the past.Have you ever discussed marriage counselling or do you think he wouldn't like that ?

 

[tinyshoes]

Sounds like you are doing well with your points and that's good you were able to go for a walk last night.As to me and my OH it got to a point where I had enough and he knew it! We did break up but he was still living with me till could find somewhere else to go,it shocked him that I 'meant it this time around' and something made him wake up and decide he wanted to fight for us,we had lots of long chats about what was wrong within the relationship and it's not 100% but it is sooo much better! I think emotions and eating often go hand in hand,I tried to lose weight a couple of times last year,we both managed to lose a couple of pounds before Christmas but I can only do this now cos i feel much better about us and myself.Im glad you have family to talk to,I vist mine often and they come here aswell,keep in touch with my friends but have felt lonely in the past.Have you ever discussed marriage counselling or do you think he wouldn't like that ?

Aw that's really great that he felt enough for you to want to fight for your relationship I thought that's what might happen when my hubby asked me to stay last year. Yes I've suggested counselling, before I got to the point of leaving last year, but he just dismissed it and said it's ridiculous and no way would he go. I've tried reading 'The Five Love Languages' which is a great book and shows how you and your partner need to receive love to feel loved, turned out I was doing what he needed which is why he thinks nothing is wrong. As for my needs, well, I showed him what I need to feel loved and he did listen but nothing has changed at all. It's so hard because I do love him, but I don't get any love back from him, or affection, or attention even! Because he was brought up in a family that doesn't show affection he doesn't need any and don't think he understands that others do. Feel like am slowly dying inside and becoming someone I don't even like. Difficult to know what to do next. Just trying to get on with things at the mo, but am conscious of my age and know that if I want to start a family am fast running out of time!! Feel under pressure but it's me putting the pressure on lol. Anyway, thanks so much for 'listening' I appreciate it.

 

[tinyshoes]

Thursday 29th March
Feeling a bit meh today! Did ok last night but used 5 weeklies which means I only have 3 left for today. Had a sneaky peek at the scales again and looks like a sts AGAIN! Not helping my mood which isn't helping me want to stick at it. Grrrr. So frustrated with so many things right now. I just want to be happy feels like a long time since I was. OMG that sounds so soft haha. Right, today's food. Tomorrow is a new day and the start of a new diet week!

Breakfast = 8
Belvita 6
Mullerlight 2

Lunch = 5
WW Tomato Soup 2
3 chilli rice cakes 3
Banana 0

Snack = 1
SAJ 1

Dinner = 10
Tesco cod in tomato/basil sauce 5
Noodles 4
Stir fried veg 1 (includes peas)

Supper = 5
Highlights 1
Rice Krispie Square 4

Total dailies used: 26/26
Total weeklies used: 3/3

Green Tea: 1 cup yucky yuck yuck!
Fruit/veg: Banana, stir fried veg - need to eat more fresh fruit/veg next week!!

 

[mrsgosling3]

Tinyshoes it's never too late to be happy. My mum said to me when I got married never to settle for anything less than what made me happy. I have had issues in my marriage and I left him for a few days but since coming back (7 years ago) things have gone from strength to strength. It's not perfect but nothing ever is and I honestly think if I hadn't left I would be in an unhappy lifeless marriage, despite how much i loved him. You only get one shot in life and I know it's hard but you have to do what feels right and makes you happy. I'm sorry if I sound harsh, it's hard to word these things without sounding harsh but you need to be selfish and put yourself first xxx

 

[bulldogdaisy]

Hi Tinyshoes,sorry to hear your feeling so low and are having a off day,deffo start again tomorrow.As Mrs G says we all deserve to be happy,wish I had a magic wand for you,it sounds like you've done everything you can for your marriage it's one of those things where the other person needs to want to change,we can't make them and even the shock of you nearly leaving didn't work,if you want i am always here for chat etc :0)

 

[tinyshoes]

Tinyshoes it's never too late to be happy. My mum said to me when I got married never to settle for anything less than what made me happy. I have had issues in my marriage and I left him for a few days but since coming back (7 years ago) things have gone from strength to strength. It's not perfect but nothing ever is and I honestly think if I hadn't left I would be in an unhappy lifeless marriage, despite how much i loved him. You only get one shot in life and I know it's hard but you have to do what feels right and makes you happy. I'm sorry if I sound harsh, it's hard to word these things without sounding harsh but you need to be selfish and put yourself first xxx

Thank you so much for reading and giving your advice. You don't sound harsh, it's just the truth isn't it. I find it hard to be totally selfish and think of only my own feelings. Break ups affect so many people don't they! And the person that leaves is usually seen as the bad person aren't they?! I'm glad things worked for you. I don't really have anywhere I can go for a few days, I would have to leave and rent somewhere you see which is usually for a minimum of 6 months! And it's even more difficult when you do love the person, just find it hard to live with the way they treat you. Sad times. Thanks again.

 

[tinyshoes]

Hi Tinyshoes,sorry to hear your feeling so low and are having a off day,deffo start again tomorrow.As Mrs G says we all deserve to be happy,wish I had a magic wand for you,it sounds like you've done everything you can for your marriage it's one of those things where the other person needs to want to change,we can't make them and even the shock of you nearly leaving didn't work,if you want i am always here for chat etc :0)

Thank you Daisy. I'm in no way perfect and maybe there are other things I could do but I don't know what. I could spend all my time with other people so am not lonely and keep myself busy/live more or less seperate lives, but to me, what's the point being with someone then? I want someone who WANTS to spend time with me, not someone I have to 'nag' into spending time with me then I just feel rubbish coz I know he would rather be somewhere else. Does that make sense? Why is life so hard sometimes?!

 

[tinyshoes]

Friday 30th March
Hmmm not much I can say really, WI and sts again! I guess after the Easter Egg incident I probably deserve it! Need to try and stay motivated to stick to plan though coz 2 weeks sts makes you start thinking what is the point?! Least it's not weight on though. Need to look back at my food diary at the weeks I lost 2lbs and see what I was doing differently if anything. Today's food, if I can stop myself having a big greasy takeaway tonight lol:

Breakfast = 6
Alpen Porridge 4
142ml ss milk 2

Snack = 0
Grapes

Lunch = 10
Leftover pasta bake 10
Banana 0

Snack = 1
SAJ 1

Dinner = 20
2 slices takeaway pizza 14?
1/3 portion french fries 6?

Choc treat = 5
Galaxy Ripple 5

Total dailies used: 26/26
Total weeklies used: 16/49 Grrr
Weeklies left: 33

 

[bulldogdaisy]

Yup that makes sense cos ive felt that way in the past with my OH plus the person who leaves isn't always seen as the bad person,people understand why,especially those who know what has been happening.i know how hard it is to leave,me and my ex hubby were basically just best friends,when i left I stayed at a friend's for a month before finding the place where I am now,was married 14 years and together 17 years,hardest thing I ever did and it was a struggle but you do adjust.Now I have my OH which has been hard work as you know but we are getting there,at the end of the day only you can do what is best for you,no regrets :0)

 

[bulldogdaisy]

Don't give up with WW,you can turn it around,good idea to look back through your food diary and see what you were eating before,.dont lose heart,good to have something to focus on.

 

[tinyshoes]

Yup that makes sense cos ive felt that way in the past with my OH plus the person who leaves isn't always seen as the bad person,people understand why,especially those who know what has been happening.i know how hard it is to leave,me and my ex hubby were basically just best friends,when i left I stayed at a friend's for a month before finding the place where I am now,was married 14 years and together 17 years,hardest thing I ever did and it was a struggle but you do adjust.Now I have my OH which has been hard work as you know but we are getting there,at the end of the day only you can do what is best for you,no regrets :0)

Wow you were together a long time it must have been really hard at the time for you! It's bad enough for me and we've only been together 7 years! I'm just scared of making the wrong decision. We get along 'ok' most of the time it's just that we're more like room mates really than anything else. He does what he wants when he wants and most of his plans don't include me, and that on top of the no affection thing has left me feeling 'distanced' from him. It's not that he is a bad man or I don't love him.

Don't give up with WW,you can turn it around,good idea to look back through your food diary and see what you were eating before,.dont lose heart,good to have something to focus on.

Thanks for your words of support. This weekend was erm not good! Have used all my weeklies in 3 days oops! Did still count though I suppose, but I don't think I can stick to only 26 points the next 4 days! Need to try and get some exercise in to earn some APs! Will be walking for half an hour every night with the doggy anyway. Might try to make myself get on my cross trainer a few times.

 

[tinyshoes]

Monday 2nd April
Another bad weekend! But I enjoyed the food lol. Friday night gave in and had pizza takeaway although only had 2 slices and 1/3 portion of the fries. Saturday had KFC lunch lol and a small piece of cake. Sunday erm wasn't too bad actually but added up what I ate Fri/Sat/Sun and used all my weeklies oops! So these next 4 days I just need to eat as few points as possible, I doubt I'll be able to stick to just my 26 points every day so am gonna allow myself to go up to 30 as I feel less pressure that way and will be more likely to stick to plan. Gonna try and earn some APs too. Ah well, that's the way it goes sometimes isn't it?!

Breakfast = 6
Belvita biscuits 6

Lunch = 9
Brown bread roll 4
2 tbsp egg mayo 2
Aldi Yoghurt 3
Clementine 0
Apple 0

Snack = 1
SAJ 1

Dinner = 9
Fish in sauce 4
Chinese Noodles 4
Stir Fried Veg 1 (includes peas)

Lost it a bit again tonight! Choc choc choc choc choc!!! Thinking it must be hormone time again! So much for being good the next few days.

Snacks = 12 TUT TUT!!!
Doritos 4
Malteaster Bunny 4
Cadbury egg 4

Total dailies used: 26/26
Total weeklies used: Erm, not weeklies now, just extra piggy points! 11 stupid choc!
Total weeklies left: now in negative figures lol

Green Tea: Maybe try for 1 cup but last week felt so poorly after drinking it not sure I wanna risk it again! Yuck.
Fruit/Veg: Clementine, Apple, stir fried veg