12.8 this morning, and yesterday, which pleases me. Choc monster still there but am doing ok. Am getting through the days eating lightly, porridge for breakfast and for lunch as the munchies are coming on in the evening.
Baked cheesecake turned out well, but have given loads away and neither OH or I have demolished what is left in the fridge. Mind you OH has just gone off to work and I am home alone for the rest of the day... might wrap a piece up for mother in law and take it round there.
Had an email from my CDC checking in and it was lovely to hear from her. She was asking about our clinic apt, and it was nice to know she was thinking of us.
Went out last night to see brother in laws new band, there were great, and saw a few people who I haven't seen in months and months. A woman said she had to do a double take as she thought OH was with someone else, and then said she didn't need to know what I had done but it had obviously worked and I looked fab! I have been at this same weight since September so it is strange when people are suprised when they see you, but so reassuring and very flattering! I always feel a little awkward at first, as I don't really draw attention to myself at all, but I find when you realise that people are genuinely pleased for you it is ok. I still have issues with being "congratulated" as I am still in denial about how big I was before I started, even though I have all the photos and stats that I need. Perhaps acknowledging and accepting my pre-CD size might help in moving forward? Who knows. As I was coming to the end of SS I said to my mum - but this is how I have always looked, to me! Obviously I see the differences, clearly 80lbs of it, but I still see me. I have two pairs of jeans that I used to wear all the time before I started the diet, and they are what I lived in when we went to New York - they are baggy style from Tesco in size 20 & 22. The 20 were my "smart" pair as they were tight. The 22 were what I wore the first night I saw my CDC. They now come up to my armpits, I can get both my legs in one leg of both pairs. I took a photo of the larger pair laid on the bed with all my smaller pairs laid out on top, crazy - I will try and upload the pic later for my records. It was really useful to look at as I was having a "fat" day, "I have ruined all my hard work" day and of course I would have to go someway to ruin it in such a short space of time, but it totally demonstrated how far I have come but how if I neglect my eating and my health and myself I can go back there - and I really don't wanna. Expecially as the smallest pair of jeans on the top are my goal size 12 next slim leg jeans that I can get on, but muffin top doesn't even go there - think the whole of my hips and butt don't fit in them.
Hmmmm, ramble on with stream of thoughts, but have helped to refresh positive thoughts for me today. So I won't have toast for breakfast, think I will put some washing on, portion up some cheesecake for MIL, go on the exercise bike for 20 mins and then have breakfast. Obviously have agood browse on Minis first
Happy Saturday everyone x