WannabeSkinnyMinnie's Fat to Fab Diary 2013

[WannabeSkinnyMinnie13]

Thanks ED, yeah it's just weird at the moment. It's hard because he doesn't think anything is wrong :S

I just hate the thought of being on my own as sad as it sounds but the handful of friends I have don't live that near or are busy having children or getting married.

Ah do you think? My sister and I are starting to look more alike now too. I think we'll look ever more similiar when there isnt a 4 stone differencebetween us Yeah I saw your pics- so cute!

Yeah holding off from the whole body shot arn't we! xxx

 

[ED.]

I was going to say that but didnt know it was your sister, You do look SO alike!!

Sad times It's horrid going through that. Maybe if OH doesn't feel anything is wrong, Then a few open chats could solve the issues, Unless its bigger, like the feeling of falling out of love

Me and OH have had our fair share of problems, and have split up for 5 months once, 2 months another time, even got new partners, flings, but it never felt right and we were always drawn back together. Very happy and solid now. Was surprised how much I realised I loved him once I had ended things and moved on, got things out of my system, but we have children so it is different I know. We have been together since 2006 now.

I can't say too much in regards to your situation as I have absolutely no idea, but if you are unhappy, don't stay for fear of being on your own Hun, I did that in one relationship. Was together for almost 5 years from the age of 15 to 19 and I was unhappy for a good amount of that time but was scared of being on my own because I wasn't used to it, being with him from an early age. When you've been in a relationship from an early age, you can miss out on some things and grow up too quickly, then resent the person and start getting urges to get out and live a little. Eventually i got the strength to leave and it was hard staying away, but it got better and I became strong and happy then, once I learnt to be happy just as me. Low confidence plays a huge part in that, finding it too hard to leave a relationship you don't want to be in. Not sure if that's you though like I said

Hopefully in your case, if thats what you want, a good open chat and working at the relationship will help, and things will be ok, better even. That can happen too, like me and OH now. I don't know. I'm sure you don't want me talking too much on a forum dishing out personal suggestions anyway

Either way I hope you will be ok and find the answers and solutions you need, It's not nice going through these times and i am here if ever you would ever like a chat, as private as you like xxx

 

[jael001]

I dont know your situation, but one thing you shouldn't be afraid of is being on your own. I'd never been on my own. I met my husband when I was 17, we started dating when I was 18 and got married when I was 23. He left me when our daughter was 9 months old and I was 30 and I was terrified of being on my own and being alone with a baby on top of that. But I've been single ever since and I've discovered who I am which was a revelation. I honestly never really knew who I was. Everything I did and liked was shaped around him, but discovering my own likes and interests made a huge difference to the quality of my life. And I love being alone now, it's been 11 years and in fact I can't actually imagine ever being in a relationship again, it seems like too much work and too many compromises, I can't see myself ever being happy doing that again. So whatever your situation and whatever you want or decide to do, it's an option and it's not a bad option, it's not the terrible scary thing we often imagine it must be, it's a really freeing experience.

 

[Mere]

Hi Minnie Can't believe you were charged for tap water. It is always free in Scotland and if anyone tried to charge they would find their place empty of customers! Sorry to hear you and OH may be having a parting of the ways. I hope things work out the way you want and don't let any upset put you off your stride with the diet.
Mere x

 

[ED.]

Hey skinnymalink! Hope you've had a good day Hun xx

 

[Miss Mac]

Good luck for weigh in tomorrow ED x

 

[Miss Mac]

Oops sorry minni-wrong diary! Must be half asleep lol

Hope you are having a great diet day though x

 

[WannabeSkinnyMinnie13]

I was going to say that but didnt know it was your sister, You do look SO alike!!

Sad times It's horrid going through that. Maybe if OH doesn't feel anything is wrong, Then a few open chats could solve the issues, Unless its bigger, like the feeling of falling out of love

Me and OH have had our fair share of problems, and have split up for 5 months once, 2 months another time, even got new partners, flings, but it never felt right and we were always drawn back together. Very happy and solid now. Was surprised how much I realised I loved him once I had ended things and moved on, got things out of my system, but we have children so it is different I know. We have been together since 2006 now.

I can't say too much in regards to your situation as I have absolutely no idea, but if you are unhappy, don't stay for fear of being on your own Hun, I did that in one relationship. Was together for almost 5 years from the age of 15 to 19 and I was unhappy for a good amount of that time but was scared of being on my own because I wasn't used to it, being with him from an early age. When you've been in a relationship from an early age, you can miss out on some things and grow up too quickly, then resent the person and start getting urges to get out and live a little. Eventually i got the strength to leave and it was hard staying away, but it got better and I became strong and happy then, once I learnt to be happy just as me. Low confidence plays a huge part in that, finding it too hard to leave a relationship you don't want to be in. Not sure if that's you though like I said

Hopefully in your case, if thats what you want, a good open chat and working at the relationship will help, and things will be ok, better even. That can happen too, like me and OH now. I don't know. I'm sure you don't want me talking too much on a forum dishing out personal suggestions anyway

Either way I hope you will be ok and find the answers and solutions you need, It's not nice going through these times and i am here if ever you would ever like a chat, as private as you like xxx

Ahh thanks ED- your such a gem. I have been with OH since I was 18 and 24 in 2 weeks time. He was my first serious boyfriend and we've been living together for 2 and a half years so fairly committed. We have a dog but no children.

I can completely emphasise with the feeling of being on your own. I guess its the weekends I'm going to dread the most- the weekdays I'm so busy I can keep myself occupied. For me, its the fact that I feel our relationship has become more like brother and sister. I just have a niggling feeling, and have had for sometime, that he isn't the 'one' if that even exists. After 4 and a half years, I;ve just been thinking surely I should feel like I want to be engaged to him soon etc. I've suggested him move out for a bit and taking me out of a weekend to see if there still is anything there. I hate the word 'break' but just feel I can't think of what I want when he's here. But like you and your OH, maybe it can strengthen what you have in the end

Sorry to spout on a forum about dieting but I guess it's easier writing things down to people who do not judge the situation.

I dont know your situation, but one thing you shouldn't be afraid of is being on your own. I'd never been on my own. I met my husband when I was 17, we started dating when I was 18 and got married when I was 23. He left me when our daughter was 9 months old and I was 30 and I was terrified of being on my own and being alone with a baby on top of that. But I've been single ever since and I've discovered who I am which was a revelation. I honestly never really knew who I was. Everything I did and liked was shaped around him, but discovering my own likes and interests made a huge difference to the quality of my life. And I love being alone now, it's been 11 years and in fact I can't actually imagine ever being in a relationship again, it seems like too much work and too many compromises, I can't see myself ever being happy doing that again. So whatever your situation and whatever you want or decide to do, it's an option and it's not a bad option, it's not the terrible scary thing we often imagine it must be, it's a really freeing experience.

Thats so inspiring that you have discovered yourself after such a horrible experience. It's true, I know eventually I'd get over it and I can imagine the sense of freeing that you talk about. It's hard because I'm so confused and don't want to make the difficult decision.

Hi Minnie Can't believe you were charged for tap water. It is always free in Scotland and if anyone tried to charge they would find their place empty of customers! Sorry to hear you and OH may be having a parting of the ways. I hope things work out the way you want and don't let any upset put you off your stride with the diet.
Mere x

Thanks Mere. Nothing will put me off this diet- its the only thing going positively. I need to get to goal and be myself again so there is no way I am going to let anything put me off my stride!
I think my OH must have paid for someone elses bottled water and didnt think to question it! I've never known anyone to charge for tap water so must be a mistake!

Thanks all Hope you've had a good day xx

 

[Mere]

Hi Minnie
Is it your WI tomorrow? Good luck if it is.
Mere x

 

[ED.]

Makes perfect sense Hun I'm glad it's all clear in your head and you have decided to do something Hope it all turns out well for you whatever you decide. Don't apologise, I talk about anything and everything in my diary! When I first started, I'd go back and delete my posts because I felt exposed, but I am so comfortable here now and find it so easy chatting to you lot, I reveal every aspect of my life now lol. it deffo helps though xx

 

[carrieclaus]

Can totally relate to how your feeling, hubby and I had a 6 month split in 2009 where he even met someone else... Was dating her, she met his family, he got his own flat.... It wasn't until I started dating ( 1 date that freaked me right out ) and other male " friends " asking me out or to be friends with benefits... :s that I realised he was my soulmate, I never mentioned how I was feeling it was he that after hearing about my 1 date phoned me and told me he loved me and couldn't bear the thought of us not being together... He ended it, handed in his notice on the flat, moved in with his mum n dad then we started dating again.

The break up was instigated by him, and I was gutted but in hindsight it was the best thing for us, at least if you do it now ( a break ) you can rediscover your feelings or remain friends. Hope that helps a bit...

Btw... You are GORGEOUS!! Check out your lashes!!! Xxx

 

[ED.]

Such a similar situation with me and OH too Carrie!!

it had the same affect with us too I am now very glad of the break up, we are the best we have ever been now and needed a reality check to realise the grass was not greener. WSM it may be the same for you or have the opposite affect, either way you will at least find out and can find peace and happiness whatever happens xx

 

[Mere]

Wise words ED.
Mere x

 

[WannabeSkinnyMinnie13]

Thanks for your message Carrie. Your story is so cute how in the end you both realised and are now going strong! I know breaks are something people think are the easy way out but perhaps it can be positive, and in both yours and ED’s case they were! I think it does make you assess the situation and realise if you can and can’t be without each other. I think it can make you appreciate each other. Personally, I just need to see how I am feeling as I get caught up day to day and don’t ever have room to just think!

Aw thank you for your lovely comliaments Unfortunately, they are getting shorter the older I get. They are the only long thing about me- everything else is short and stumpy and it looks like my lashed are going the same way

 

[ED.]

I don't think you look at all stumpy! The more weight you lose the more I'm sure you will see yourself though. Look at my first 'before' photo in that absolutely HIDEOUS outfit (OMG) brown stripes jumper See how stumpy I look? And I'm 5ft 7! Now some fat has gone I don't look half as stumpy. You are cute and dainty not short and stumpy

Soon you will be called PETITE! Would love to be called that lol xx

 

[notsoskinnymarge]

Hey minnie..... you are doing marvellous
I would also say don't be afraid of being on your own.
I was much happier on my own than I ever was in the latter years of my marriage. ...
Maybe some time apart will be good for both your souls

 

[WannabeSkinnyMinnie13]

I can't wait to be cute and dainty! Petite rather than short and fat haha!

Thanks Marge for your wise words It's more the living on my own that scares me and the thought of never meeting anyone else in the future and having to deal with the fact that I made the decision.

To cheer me up, I'm going back home Saturday and it's just going to be mum, my sister and I. We're going to have a film night and finally watching Greyfriars Bobby- a film that I got for Christmas after my trip to Edinburgh Fringe. A little bit of TLC from the family should sort me out

On a happier note, I am treating myself to a glass of coke zero tonight as I have drank all my 4 litres before 6pm!! Was like a goldfish today!!

Also had an outside agency worker in today and she noticed that I'd lost a lot of weight since our last meeting an how fabulous I looked. She said she could tell it has come off my face I've had a lot of people tell me that recently, I hope it is coming off other places too!!

Not long to my WI now

The weeks go so quick!

 

[Mere]

Hi Minnie
I hope you enjoy the film. It is one of my favourites. Did you see the wee statue of Bobby when you were in Edinburgh?
Mere x

 

[WannabeSkinnyMinnie13]

Hey Mere, I can't wait to watch it, though going to have to have my tissues at the ready. Such a cute story and being such a dog lover, know it's going to be weepy!

Yeah I saw the statue I went home and told my mum all about it and thats when she suprised me months later buying it for me at Christmas.

xx

 

[Mere]

Awe that was really lovely of your mum.
Mere x