Weight loss again

[Alecto_on_LCD]

Sounds bloody awful! Well done for surviving x

Thankies. Survived is indeed the right word!

 

[Alecto_on_LCD]

Took my measurements today - for fun. Wont be doing that too often but i want to see if anything changes later on.
Neck=35cm
Chest=94cm
Waist=82cm
Hip=108
US Navy body fat calculator= 36.5% body fat (obese)
BMI method calculator = 27.5%
Lean mass estimation = 44.1kg
Fat mass estimation = 25.4kg

 

[AliGal]

Loving your diary. I'm looking forward to posting when you are phasing off and maintaining. Thank you!

 

[Alecto_on_LCD]

Loving your diary. I'm looking forward to posting when you are phasing off and maintaining. Thank you!

Aww thank you hun!

 

[Alecto_on_LCD]

Good lazy TS day. 3K steps, 5.25l water. Early sleepy times!

 

[Alecto_on_LCD]

Should i be worried about loose skin? Ill have about 50lb to get rid of so....i wonder if should out smth in place for that? My tummy is starting to look a bit funny...not sure if its still fat im getting rid of or I'm getting excess skin already? Should i slow down my losses maybe?!

 

[ange82much]

Hi Alecto - just thought i'd pop in and say you're going great. Really good effort.
And keep going - it's really worth it, and i can report back that life as a lightweight is fantastic, still!

I'v ditched 47lb this year - about 42 of that over 5 months, and I probably have got some loose skin but you can't really tell unless gravity is showing in weird ways (eg if I do a plank I can see it on my legs and stomach. But i'm 50, so older than you. I wouldn't worry about it tbh (but then i'm not the person to comment really as I don't really care about that on myself).

Good work on the measurements. Never did mine. Not that I really want to be reminded where I came from right now!

 

[Ketoveggie]

Should i be worried about loose skin? Ill have about 50lb to get rid of so....i wonder if should out smth in place for that? My tummy is starting to look a bit funny...not sure if its still fat im getting rid of or I'm getting excess skin already? Should i slow down my losses maybe?!

Hey Alecto,

I found this article from MDA talking about loose skin. Might be worth a read. https://www.marksdailyapple.com/how-to-get-rid-of-excess-skin-after-major-weight-loss/

As for slowing down your losses. I guess that's personal choice. I'm starting to believe that when the BMI is below 30 a rethink of Calories consumed needs some thought. Going up to 800 may well benefit you at this stage.
I'm rejigging my ideas on this all the time to see an improvement. My thinking right now is to alternate days between 600 - 800 cals. I read shaking things up can help. Like cyclical fasting or moving the feeding window, things such as that.

 

[Alecto_on_LCD]

Day 35. 69.4kg.
Last night i did something very naughty - no longer a good TS day for yesterday. Having read and seen too many scary videos on loose skin i got paranoid about losing weight too quickly. I felt I didnt want another 'lose day' and felt afraid of it, wanted to slow it down. Not to be read as I dont want a 1kg to 1.5kg loss a week, nor as I want to stay on this for longer...but as...I know Id reach my target if I dont lose weight every day...any way my partner had gone to his friend's house for some take away and Saturday fun. I was fine with it as i wanted an evening on my own...which i ended up spending staring in the mirror at each fat and blob fold on my body...Couldn't fall asleep and hunger strook powerfully. I was continously thinking that a. I will rush off this morning to a chippy or do it in secret on Monday or b. Id get the JustEat app up to get something as dirty as possible and then hide that I've done it. That was all happening around 11pm... I went to the kitchen and made myself a sandwich. As ive not interacted with the fridge or home shopping in ages there werent many things there. But i spruced up something on 450ish calories...it all put me at 1080 cals for yestersay and still over a 500cal deficit for the day (i.e. you need at 3500cal deficit per week for 1kg of fat to go). I calculated it all this morning and realised - amazed- how many calories there were in the tiny little thing i had made myself. I used to eat 3 of these things in one go just 5 weeks ago, easily.... Well. Tasted nice-ish but not amazing - so that's my taste buds changing. Left me feeling kinda too full and bloated and i know i would've preferred spinach but there was none in the house. So preferences are changing too. Finally, if that is my image if a wild Saturday night then that's a good change imo - I made a sandwich but i did not binge on sandwiches!

The downs sides? I feel like I've cheated myself again - which I surely did; and wanted to hide it from people as if...if I do that I can also hide it from myself.. I feel like I've lied to myself about my determination (which shows how willpower can be influenced by so many factors!) - I couldve said NO and put the ingredients back in the fridge at any point, I considered it at every step of the way, but I consciously chose not to. Given i had carbs, I'm expecting tomorrow and the day after to be a bit slumpy. I'm not expecting major gains or anything like that - it's more about my relationship with food and...feeling like I've done it because there was no one in the house to see it, so I've done it (partly) in secret....i did confess to it here and to my partner (although I found it difficult!). But what was going through my slightly rebelling mind was "well if he's not here, i may as well give myself a little cheeky treat". Finally as I was feeling too full after it I thought "if I go discard this now I will feel better for having had it". I didn't do it. I saw what was happening and told myself to cozy up in bed and finally fell asleep. I still feel too full and my intestines full of things right this moment....But I dont like these parts of my thought processes as I can see they are dangerous paths in my relationship with food.

 

[Alecto_on_LCD]

Hey Alecto,

I found this article from MDA talking about loose skin. Might be worth a read. https://www.marksdailyapple.com/how-to-get-rid-of-excess-skin-after-major-weight-loss/

As for slowing down your losses. I guess that's personal choice. I'm starting to believe that when the BMI is below 30 a rethink of Calories consumed needs some thought. Going up to 800 may well benefit you at this stage.
I'm rejigging my ideas on this all the time to see an improvement. My thinking right now is to alternate days between 600 - 800 cals. I read shaking things up can help. Like cyclical fasting or moving the feeding window, things such as that.

Thank you. I'll read that in a second. I will treat my food week which commences on 8th August as an experiment for that. But if I can will carry on with 600 until then as 'default' position as Ive gotten used to it.

 

[Alecto_on_LCD]

Hey Alecto,

I found this article from MDA talking about loose skin. Might be worth a read. https://www.marksdailyapple.com/how-to-get-rid-of-excess-skin-after-major-weight-loss/

As for slowing down your losses. I guess that's personal choice. I'm starting to believe that when the BMI is below 30 a rethink of Calories consumed needs some thought. Going up to 800 may well benefit you at this stage.
I'm rejigging my ideas on this all the time to see an improvement. My thinking right now is to alternate days between 600 - 800 cals. I read shaking things up can help. Like cyclical fasting or moving the feeding window, things such as that.

I liked the article thank you. It surely is skin that fully fills my hand as opposed to parchment-thin. As any food kicks me out of keto anyway on food week im planning to get some lemons in my water (i miss lemons like mad, odd, aye?!). I was potentially thinkin of making some soup as i miss my home made versions. Ill consider oxtail to have the bone broth with all its nutrients if i decide my week food plan allows it. Ill have a careful ponder. Thank you, again x

 

[Ketoveggie]

Interesting to read what you've written above. From a strangers perspective what I'm seeing in that is it's what other people think of you matters more than what you think of yourself. You posted earlier about the reaction you had from your Mum and brother(?) about your diet, perhaps you should delve more into those feelings in relation to your eating habits and why you sometimes feel you 'sabotage' yourself? We cannot control what other people think, we can only control our reactions to those people.
Do you think it's possible that you having a 'cheat' and confessing it to your partner is because you have been conditioned to expect people to think badly about you, so you go seeking the 'punishment' to get it over with? I wonder if it really matters to your partner for his sake that you had some food, I wonder if he cares more that he sees you feeling so bad about it?
Sorry, don't mean to psychoanalyse you, it's just my perspective on the above.
From what I know of you from your posting on this forum, you seem a very kind and caring person, don't be so hard on yourself. x

 

[Alecto_on_LCD]

Hi Alecto - just thought i'd pop in and say you're going great. Really good effort.
And keep going - it's really worth it, and i can report back that life as a lightweight is fantastic, still!

I'v ditched 47lb this year - about 42 of that over 5 months, and I probably have got some loose skin but you can't really tell unless gravity is showing in weird ways (eg if I do a plank I can see it on my legs and stomach. But i'm 50, so older than you. I wouldn't worry about it tbh (but then i'm not the person to comment really as I don't really care about that on myself).

Good work on the measurements. Never did mine. Not that I really want to be reminded where I came from right now!

Thank you dear Angie. What you're saying does put my mind at ease. You are I think right. I honestly wouldn't be bothered with a tad bit of loose skin showing off when i do a plank or something. I was more worried about the very excessive versions - I seriously think I watched too many extreme videos on YouTube last night. Silly bird I am..

 

[Alecto_on_LCD]

Interesting to read what you've written above. From a strangers perspective what I'm seeing in that is it's what other people think of you matters more than what you think of yourself. You posted earlier about the reaction you had from your Mum and brother(?) about your diet, perhaps you should delve more into those feelings in relation to your eating habits and why you sometimes feel you 'sabotage' yourself? We cannot control what other people think, we can only control our reactions to those people.
Do you think it's possible that you having a 'cheat' and confessing it to your partner is because you have been conditioned to expect people to think badly about you, so you go seeking the 'punishment' to get it over with? I wonder if it really matters to your partner for his sake that you had some food, I wonder if he cares more that he sees you feeling so bad about it?
Sorry, don't mean to psychoanalyse you, it's just my perspective on the above.
From what I know of you from your posting on this forum, you seem a very kind and caring person, don't be so hard on yourself. x

Wow...no don't be sorry. Wow...hmmm...light bulb moment approaching. Let me think for a bit on that. Hmmm. Other's bad thoughts of me matter the most unfortunately...I am not accustomed to take compliments and even understand them properly...i place more weight (automatically not coz I want to!) on my bad thoughts of myself than good ones. And i seek negative reactions often.
I'm having therapy (talking) for the stuff re my pretty difficult history with my mum/family (for the stuff that contributes highly to my depression bouts). My therapist says the same things. Yes. I was expecting disapproval and 'punishment' from my partner and yourselves on here. I sabotage the good things I do for myself to continuously reinforce the thoughts that 'Im bad, not worth it, broken'. And then seek external validation that 'see ive done badly/i cheated, hence Im no good'. I've not realised this stuff comes across that clearly in my diary... While ive been using alcohol the same way (my mum kept on calling me an alcoholic for ages; my therapist said im absolutely fine but if im still worried to just get a referral; my alcohol counsellor thought i was fine from the beginning, just that she believes I lost/never found the right confidence to get me out of vicious cycles of doing bad stuff to myself). At least that 1 thing is out of the way. But now i start doing that with food. Ill think about my relationship with food from that perspective. So insightful and thank you so much for reading through my diary and telling me this!! Also thank you for your kind words ❤

 

[Ketoveggie]

Wow...no don't be sorry. Wow...hmmm...light bulb moment approaching. Let me think for a bit on that. Hmmm. Other's bad thoughts of me matter the most unfortunately...I am not accustomed to take compliments and even understand them properly...i place more weight (automatically not coz I want to!) on my bad thoughts of myself than good ones. And i seek negative reactions often.
I'm having therapy (talking) for the stuff re my weird and pretty difficult past with my mum and brother (for the stuff that contributes highly to my depression bouts). My therapists says the same things. Yes. I was expecting disapproval and 'punishment' from my partner and yourselves on here. I sabotage the good things I do for myself to continuously reinforce the thoughts that 'Im bad, not worth it, broken'. And then seek external validation that 'see ive done badly/i cheated, hence Im no good'. I've not realised this stuff comes across that clearly in my diary... While ive been using alcohol the same way (my mum kept on calling me an alcoholic for ages; my therapist said im absolutely fine but if im still worried to just get a referral; my alcohol counsellor thought i was fine from the beginning, just that she believes I lost/never found the right confidence to get me out of vicious cycles of doing bad stuff to myself). At least that 1 thing is out of the way. But now i start doing that with food. Ill think about my relationship with food from that perspective. So insightful and thank you so much for reading through my diary and telling me this!! Also thank you for your kind words ❤

It's quite a common process to resolve one 'problem' and replace it with another, then another, then. . . It will continue until you get to the root of the real issue and tackle that ( your family?) I hope you can resolve this and move on. It's just one those annoying neural pathways which have become too well worn. You just need to take a side step.
There is a really simple exercise you can do to make mental changes which you could try if it seems like something which may help?

From now on make a conscious effort to assume that people are feeling positively towards you, take it for granted that they are, tell yourself this. Do it with everyone you talk to, with everyone who you pass in the street.
You could totally reprogram your negative self belief by making it your default setting to assume people see the best in you. All the negative chatter that goes on in our heads should only be given mild interest and not fed by joining in and adding to it with more negativity. I hope that helps. x

 

[RareKiwi27]

@Alecto_on_LCD you are doing so well it’s a blip only. Self sabotage at its most classic. It’s obvious that you have insight and it’s positive that you’re speaking to someone.

Life experiences make us all unique, you survive day to day and if I can say anything it’s be kind to yourself lovely. Focus on one day at a time x

 

[Alecto_on_LCD]

Week 6. Day 36.
69.3 kg (10.91st, 152.8lb)
Week loss= 1.1kg (2.42lb)
Overall loss= 8.3kg (1.3st, 18.4lb).
The 69 on the dot is coming together slowly. I always hit plateau when trying to get back there in the past so that was expected hence why i set it as first milestone.
Next one is 64 due to the same reaon.
1kg in 1 week may be slow in terms of VLCD but I am fine with that as it puts any anxieties at ease. Also i am just below where i predicted I should/could be at this point, based on average losses with this diet from my readings (i.e. 1-2kg a week).
Going to focus this week in preparation for food week on week 7.

Finished my yesterday on 3 exantes, 3l water, 3.6k steps. Bit of trouble falling asleep again but probably transient.

 

[a_kelpie]

Well done! Another very solid week. Must be exciting to be in the 60s/10s... I know what you mean about random previous plateaus or sticking points: I'm eyeing up 194lb in the same way. I'm going to smash that guy this time.

I'm glad you mentioned talking therapy upthread... going by the advice 'never talk to yourself in a way you wouldn't talk to your best friend', you are SO hard on yourself, especially considering how positive and encouraging you are to all others here! Just a sandwich, dude. It's perfectly ok. As great as VLCD can be, I think there is something iffy about the notion of being '100%' or 'totally strict', just psychologically. It's not a mindset you want to get fully into. You know what a cheat or slip-up is, but you also know your own body and when it genuinely needs a thing. Each time something goes off-track you learn from it, too.

RE: loose skin, that's a problem for down the line. Don't let it panic you now. I would rather have loose skin than be fat. Lots of articles out there about how much fat is stored in loose skin, and how a further body fat reduction can often blast it, even when it just feels like skin. Also, most of the omg-scaremongering articles about it are related to gastric band surgery and people who have lost far, FAR more than 50lb. Like... 250lb. It's entirely body-specific and you won't know until you get there. Studies about whether fast or moderate weight loss result in more loose skin are also conflicting, and skin often tightens (to an extent) by itself on a totally different timescale to weight loss. You're doing amazingly well with hydration, which will help a bunch. Keep moisturising, too!

You're a kind and thoughtful and bright person and we're all glad you're on here with us - be kind to yourself and keep going.

 

[Alecto_on_LCD]

It's quite a common process to resolve one 'problem' and replace it with another, then another, then. . . It will continue until you get to the root of the real issue and tackle that ( your family?) I hope you can resolve this and move on. It's just one those annoying neural pathways which have become too well worn. You just need to take a side step.
There is a really simple exercise you can do to make mental changes which you could try if it seems like something which may help?

From now on make a conscious effort to assume that people are feeling positively towards you, take it for granted that they are, tell yourself this. Do it with everyone you talk to, with everyone who you pass in the street.
You could totally reprogram your negative self belief by making it your default setting to assume people see the best in you. All the negative chatter that goes on in our heads should only be given mild interest and not fed by joining in and adding to it with more negativity. I hope that helps. x

Thank you, Keto. You are so nice and I think you are right indeed.

 

[Alecto_on_LCD]

Well done! Another very solid week. Must be exciting to be in the 60s/10s... I know what you mean about random previous plateaus or sticking points: I'm eyeing up 194lb in the same way. I'm going to smash that guy this time.

I'm glad you mentioned talking therapy upthread... going by the advice 'never talk to yourself in a way you wouldn't talk to your best friend', you are SO hard on yourself, especially considering how positive and encouraging you are to all others here! Just a sandwich, dude. It's perfectly ok. As great as VLCD can be, I think there is something iffy about the notion of being '100%' or 'totally strict', just psychologically. It's not a mindset you want to get fully into. You know what a cheat or slip-up is, but you also know your own body and when it genuinely needs a thing. Each time something goes off-track you learn from it, too.

RE: loose skin, that's a problem for down the line. Don't let it panic you now. I would rather have loose skin than be fat. Lots of articles out there about how much fat is stored in loose skin, and how a further body fat reduction can often blast it, even when it just feels like skin. Also, most of the omg-scaremongering articles about it are related to gastric band surgery and people who have lost far, FAR more than 50lb. Like... 250lb. It's entirely body-specific and you won't know until you get there. Studies about whether fast or moderate weight loss result in more loose skin are also conflicting, and skin often tightens (to an extent) by itself on a totally different timescale to weight loss. You're doing amazingly well with hydration, which will help a bunch. Keep moisturising, too!

You're a kind and thoughtful and bright person and we're all glad you're on here with us - be kind to yourself and keep going.

Thank you Kelpie. You are very kind, thank you for making me feel so welcome! Yeah, I think 50lb is not that huge in the great scheme of things...And I like your 'just a sandwich, dude' remark - really does put it in perspective and it's a bit funny - getting paranoid about a silly sandwich, that's just ridiculous of me.
I've not been in the 60s in ages...Today I wore a pair of jeans size 12 (stretchy) I bought for myself ages ago but never got to wear them as I went up again quite quickly after I bough them. It's nice wearing new clothes that fit well and provides good motivation/reward every time I look at them. We're buying 2 new wardrobes in the house and a new fridge. The latter will be used to store a lot of veg and home-made ready meals for my food weeks (hurray!). The wardrobes will get filled up with the clothes I will be bringing down from the loft sometime soon. I love the fact you said in my first week I'll be up there getting them in no time and....I'm already thinking of when I'll be planning that in my schedule. I'll probs wait until Week 8 or 9 but...close enough!