2013 the year to lose 100lbs+, 19lbs gone exactly 100lbs to go :D

[madmuppet]

The first of a couple of posts as i need to catch up for yesterday lol sorry may be a ramble

Food diary
1 shake
crackerbread with tuna and cucumber
1 ski yogurt
crackerbread with cucumber and pepper - this should have been roast chicken and veg!

Well the day started of quite well got up and did shred dvd before hitting the bath and then going to watch eldest play footie, got to love standing around in the cold for a couple of hours unfortunetly his team lost
Got home and did lunch and then did my first 5 miles on bike whilst kids and hubby were pottering about doing bits and pieces. About 3ish hubby asked if i wanted him to put the chicken in the oven for dinner, i chuckled he never ever does this and i'm not even sure if he even knows how to do it we have been together for like 15yrs (OMG that is just plain scary) and the most cooking he has done envolves toast and something like eggs/beans etc tell a lie he can put frozen things in the oven but only after asking me how to turn the oven on. Anyway so i said to him if he really wants to help he can do the washing up while i peel the veg to my shock he said yes (again he never ever washes up i think i can count on both hands the amount of times he has done this) so i set about sorting some washing out folding it etc and putting it all away, cleaned the bathroom post footie mud great fun lol and whilst doing this thinking he would sort the washing up out but nope he plonked himself on the pc and blantetly ignored me so i could see where this was going i carried on doing the bits i wanted to get done in the vain hope that he would do the dishes but no he stayed on the pc so i blitzed the kitchen, peeled the veg got the dinner cooking and then did the last 5 miles on me bike by which point im fuming its not that i had to do the dishes god i always have to do them i do everything round here from making sure the bills get paid to sorting everything out for the boys to putting the bins out literally everything and i just feel majorly took for granted.
Normally this would make be binge or just walk out the front door and chill for a hour but i got though it i dished the dinner up and as i was doing it i just didnt want it anymore, thought what was the point of it all so just did the 3 of there's and gave it to them and did the dishes again straight away lol. Got no thanks for it from hubby!! and its that that does my head in not only does he offer to help and then decides he doesnt want to but then to ignore me completley as if im in the wrong just really really grates me needless to say the rest of the evening was a quiet one till it was bed time and then he thinks its alright to chat again and im meant to be all happy and smiley grrr.

 

[madmuppet]

Hi muppet, I'm finally here for a return visit Great diary, you're doing fantastic! I can relate to so much of what you've said, with the emotional/frustrated eating and the binges - looks like you're succeeding in getting your head straight on that one. I spent more than half of my life battling depression, so I know full well how hard it is for you, I'm lucky to have a wonderful OH who has stood by me always, and your OH is lucky too!

You're doing everything right, you'll be at goal before you know it x

Hi hun nice to see you again and thank you I think depression is something that so many people just dont understand how it effects not only the person suffering but those around them and it is something so hard to bring up in conversation with people that i often just keep it all in, it's one thing that this diary is helping with the fact that there are some great people here that understand and dont judge at all its great to have everyones support.

Hope your having a great week hun and i'll pop by your diary in abit to catch up x

YOU ARE SO IN THE ZONE!!!

How are you finding the bike? Was it easy to put together? Did you go for manual or electric in the end?

x

I'm loving the bike am so pleased that i got one It was super easy to put together just had to put the bottom supports on and the handlebars and seat no problem what so ever. I got a mains powered one so that i dont have to fiddle with adjusting the tension it does it all by itself unless i do programme 1 which i can then just hit a button and adjust the tension myself. At the moment i'm doing 2 half hour sessions on programme 1 with a tension of 4 works out i can do 5 miles each 30mins so going to keep at that for a while before going on to the next programme which will include hills lol xx

Hi hun, just catching up after a mad week! You are doing so fab x

Thanks hun as always a great support, hope your busy week has been great for the weight loss xx

 

[madmuppet]

hope you feel better soon hun! Well done on the kitkat front, let me know the report on the coconut one! lol I dont buy anything that nestle produce, have been boycotting them for years, but I do so miss kit kats. lol X

Well the boys all shared the kitkats over the weekend and the fact that each bar breaks into 3 pieces i didnt try a single piece heres the reviews lol

Hazelnut - T didnt like at all and the other 2 ate it but thought it was a bit sickly
Chocolate fudge - thumbs up all round
Mint - Their fave of all 4 really minty and yummy
Coconut - The boys liked it thought it was nice but perfered the mint and hubby was dissappointed in it said it was nice but was expecting it to be more coconutty a bit of a let down

Over all think it will be the mint kit kat that stays aboves the others

Hope this helps everyone lol im glad i didnt eat any of them xx

 

[madmuppet]

Finally back to monday

Today is weigh in day something i was looking forward to, hopefully to see a 18 on the scales but that feeling didnt last to long as hubby was a arse this morning and sort of put a dampener on it all
We had a argument over tinfoil!! tinfoil i mean really it's pathetic but anyone would think it was the end of the world for hubby this morning and it completely peed me off.
Did my weigh in once he had gone to work and when i saw the number i didnt get any excitement or joy all because of the way hubby was and the way he made me feel!! and because of this im even more peed of as i should be jumping for joy i should be really happy so why cant i be.
Head is just full of second guessing stuff and trying to see if i really have a future here with hubby and by my previous post this year we will have been together 15 yrs/married 10 and when i typed that it made me feel quite scared. 15yrs of being with the same person to growing up with them to sharing everything with them (not quite as much just lately) its a hell of a long time and im just questioning if this is going to be how it is for the next 15yrs ho hum im having a moment it happens every few months when hubby is a pain and i let him get away with everything so not to make him feel worst but in doing this it makes me feel worst its a catch 22 :/ Im still waiting on his case worker to phone and they havent they even said to him last week again that they would but still im waiting and he sees them again tomorrow perhaps i should just go with him and go in after him lol

Anyway i have done my shred day 2 of level 2 and its a killer lol not quite as bad as i was at the start of level 1 but ouch im looking forward to seeing the inch different at the end of the month 18 days to go and i will have completed 30 days didnt think i would get this far so woo hoo.

Right im off to catch up on your diarys and to chance my ticker... smiles are you ready for this girls (and paul) drum roll please ...... 4 lbs off this week im happy im in the 18st bracket for the first time in 8 years and it only took 4 weeks of dieting to do it! I am happy and writing it now im smiling i did good thats 1lb short of a stone in a month well pleased im doing this and im going to succeed along with all of you we are going to get to target xx

 

[sapphirestara]

I think minty would be my fav! I love mint choc!!

 

[mybodyisacage]

I think my ex and your OH may have gone to the same school for lazy ass boys who never cook/clean/do anything useful lol Im like you, most of the time its easier just to get on with it all and do it properly. but sometimes. oh my. it really does get to you doesnt it?!

You are doing so well with your exercise, I think you are going to see a huge inch difference!

Congrats on your loss!!! That is so good! We've pretty much done the same for Jan How good are we ay?!

XXXX

 

[sapphirestara]

I think my ex and your OH may have gone to the same school for lazy ass boys who never cook/clean/do anything useful lol Im like you, most of the time its easier just to get on with it all and do it properly. but sometimes. oh my. it really does get to you doesnt it?!



XXXX

And mine.........

 

[sapphirestara]

Ur oh sounds like her needs a reality check babe xx

 

[Rakelnahe]

He does so! You're doing fabulous, 4 lb is a great loss! Congrats on breaking the stone barrier, feels great to be in the next bracket down doesn't it? You're such an inspiration to me

 

[madmuppet]

Just updating on past food diarys will be back later to ramble away the past couple days lol

Monday
1 shake
crackerbread with cucumber and peppers
1 ski mousse
hairy bikers lasange with courgette (thanks tara yummy liked it alot more to)

Tuesday
1 shake
1 ww yogurt
4 digestives
5 squares of dairy milk
crackerbreads with cheese slice and cucumber and pepper
1 toast and scrabbled 1 egg
2 creamcrackers
tub cottage cheese

Still did the 30 day shread and 10miles each day on bike will be back later hope everyones well xx

 

[mybodyisacage]

a little bit of naughtiness in there but not too bad overall! x

 

[sapphirestara]

Just updating on past food diarys will be back later to ramble away the past couple days lol

Monday
1 shake
crackerbread with cucumber and peppers
1 ski mousse
hairy bikers lasange with courgette (thanks tara yummy liked it alot more to)

Tuesday
1 shake
1 ww yogurt
4 digestives
5 squares of dairy milk
crackerbreads with cheese slice and cucumber and pepper
1 toast and scrabbled 1 egg
2 creamcrackers
tub cottage cheese

Still did the 30 day shread and 10miles each day on bike will be back later hope everyones well xx

Courgette for the win!!! I thought I might try courgette and leek combo! Cracking day missy! And 10miles on the bike! Well done!!! Xx

 

[madmuppet]

I think my ex and your OH may have gone to the same school for lazy ass boys who never cook/clean/do anything useful lol Im like you, most of the time its easier just to get on with it all and do it properly. but sometimes. oh my. it really does get to you doesnt it?!

You are doing so well with your exercise, I think you are going to see a huge inch difference!

Congrats on your loss!!! That is so good! We've pretty much done the same for Jan How good are we ay?!

XXXX

OH certainly needs a big kick up the bum i can tell ya lol
I only took measurements last friday and am going to wait till the end of the 30 day shred and compare them I have noticed that my shoulders are looking better and my jeans are getting looser which im pleased about.
If febuary is anything like this past month we are so in the zone hun we will be skinny minnies before we know it xx

He does so! You're doing fabulous, 4 lb is a great loss! Congrats on breaking the stone barrier, feels great to be in the next bracket down doesn't it? You're such an inspiration to me

Feels awesome hun roll on seeing the 17st mark I cant wait

me a inspiration eek Im flattered hun thank you, together we can all get though this and hit our goals I know i wouldnt be where i am now if it wasnt for the support from all you guys xx

 

[madmuppet]

Wednesday Food diary

2 shakes
4 crackerbread with cucumber and spring onion
1 ww yogurt

Could have been better and so much worst so hey ho it it is what it is.

 

[madmuppet]

So I've been abit quiet the last few days and tbh im struggling abit
Since the weekend my minds been on non stop and cant shake out of it, hubbys caseworker actually called on monday and she has made me a appointment for next wednesday to go and see her and chat about things, I got of the phone and burst into tears doh! On one hand i cant wait to go and see her and see what exactly is going on with hubby but on the other hand im dreading it aswell, im scared to how much im going to let pour out of me and how this will affect things with hubby as obviously when he next sees her after me im guessing she will bring things up that i have spoke about, and im also worried what hubby has said to her as well. It's put me on a right downer and i cant snap out of it just want next week to be here and get it over and done with. Things with hubby are quiet and tense, he missed his appointment this week and has said to her he cant make any next week and will phone to make another one which normal means he will just leave it and leave it meanwhile getting worst and worst and work really isnt helping him at the mo he is stressing out way to much and just wants to chuck it all in which in turn heaps the pressure on me to try and keep everything calm round the house and stress that he's going to come home one of these days to tell me he's chucked his job and then we would be up the creak without a paddle.
Tuesdays food could have been so so much worst as all i wanted to do was eat, it is certainly my coping point when it comes to stress and i found myself battling with it and to be fair making myself feel a whole lot worst, yesterday was the complete opposite i didnt want to touch food incase it triggered a binge hence 2 shakes and then at half 9 last night i had the crackerbread solely so i had had something. Today im going to try and be better with food and have 2 shakes and a proper meal otherwise i can see me messing up my rythem.

I have continued to do the10 miles on my bike a day and the shred and am now half way though it which i have never done before, i did struggle today just with the motivation to do it and whilst i was doing it i had the "whats the point" head on me. I know there is a lot of point to it, Im losing weight and am healthier then i have been for ages. I could sit and do nothing all day but this really isnt going to help me at all and i really need to snap out of it which i really dont think is going to happen till after next wednesday. I really really need to crack on and blitz this house it's well and truly awful and i have my son having a sleepover tomorrow night here so I have no excuses what so ever it needs to be done!

Well thats a rather depressing update sorry peps but with the highs come the lows like with everything just got to find a way though it and for it not to be Food!!
Am off to start the grand tidy up (seriously my house could rival one from that hoarders programme or aggy and kym lmao)

Stay strong peps we can and are doing this hope everyone has a great day xx

 

[madmuppet]

Food diary
1 shake
5 crackerbread
1 ski yogurt
and then just wanted to eat so
2 mini packs mini cheddars
10 crackerbread with tub cottage cheese
still just want to go and eat everything i can lay my hands on but am sitting here instead am having meatballs for tea with salad instead of the spaghetti and then i think im going to have a bath and a early night as fear i will submerge to the demons that will be biscuits and crap later.

Ugg really hope tomorrow is a better day i have my eldest having his friends sleep over and that means pizza from the takeaway for them (i know im not going to have that thank god) and munchies but i feel that tomorrow night will be good i just have to make it though the day which judging by the lack of cleaning i have done so far will be busy.

 

[mybodyisacage]

For 'overeating', youve done pretty well lol Pretty much all healthy choices and avoided some seriously bad issues! I seriously feel your pain about the no motivation, I guess this is why there are so many statistics about people stopping their diets mid feb lol cos it gets so hard to stick to it that long.

Maybe we should both write some lists to help us.

I am thinking:
Why do you want to lose weight?
What do you hate about being obese?
What is stopping you?

What do you reckon?

x

 

[mybodyisacage]

Hope you're okay today xxx

 

[paul1989]

You are doing really well, nearly a stone in a month is amazing for anyone. Keep it up, here to follow

 

[sapphirestara]

Are you ok? Xx