Beelishy's VLCD Weight Loss Adventure!!
- Thread starter beelishy
- Start date
beelishy
......gettin' it done.
Morning.
STS. Its ok though. I had an extra pancake last night so im sure that didnt help. *sigh* I was up late, talking to hubby about what to do and i NEEDED something. (she says..) so...i decided to make a pack, rather than a sandwich and packet of crisps. so i probably should be happy its still 228 and not up past 230.
hubby took a pic of me yesteray walking with zoe...and i can see i have actually put WEIGHT WEIGHT on. I need to get this kicked into gear. scared the crap out of me. and my jeans are more snug. and my belt only goes to the 1st hole...2nd one at a push!!
Im aiming for 220 (HA!) by WI to get me back to where i was earlier in the week.
So we have decided...we are going (provided the visa comes through!) and will be leaving in the first 2 weeks of october. We have also decided to TRY to take the cat. ONce the visa actually gets here (i still havent sent them the birth certificate yet..once i get that..and get it sent to them...i would imagine it would be with us within a further week or two...so no later than mid august!) we will reprice it with the pet transport people and also ring a few airlines to price up doing it ourselves. We talked for a good hour or two last night and aside from a lot of the ovbious fears it came to light that i feel an enormous amount of pressure and i dont want hubby to feel like ive let him down or im not trying hard enough etc...if i dont get a job straight away....etc. i also told him that i feel crap and doubt myself completely. I knwo how to be a SAHM mom here. that is my job and Im really good at it (may as well toot my own horn! lol). Im confident in it and know exactly what to do and how to do it. i dont know how to be a working mother, in the USA. i feel completely out of my depth and frantic. so anyway..he took a lot of the pressure off by telling me that it was all just in my own head and he wouldnt absolutely not feel that way. anyway. it was good. so i feel a lot better about it.
anyway.
food today:
a/c porridge pancake that i didnt end up having yesterday!
pancake
chili w/broccoli
2 eggs w/broccoli
829/66
thats a bit more like it.
and im gonna ditch the broccoli once its gone. i have enough for today and tomorrow...and then thats it. its too much temptation and DOES lead me astray. sadly. so yeah.
thats that.
i had a coffee and im gonna go get my 1st water of the day.
here we go. AGAIN.
STS. Its ok though. I had an extra pancake last night so im sure that didnt help. *sigh* I was up late, talking to hubby about what to do and i NEEDED something. (she says..) so...i decided to make a pack, rather than a sandwich and packet of crisps. so i probably should be happy its still 228 and not up past 230.
hubby took a pic of me yesteray walking with zoe...and i can see i have actually put WEIGHT WEIGHT on. I need to get this kicked into gear. scared the crap out of me. and my jeans are more snug. and my belt only goes to the 1st hole...2nd one at a push!!
Im aiming for 220 (HA!) by WI to get me back to where i was earlier in the week.
So we have decided...we are going (provided the visa comes through!) and will be leaving in the first 2 weeks of october. We have also decided to TRY to take the cat. ONce the visa actually gets here (i still havent sent them the birth certificate yet..once i get that..and get it sent to them...i would imagine it would be with us within a further week or two...so no later than mid august!) we will reprice it with the pet transport people and also ring a few airlines to price up doing it ourselves. We talked for a good hour or two last night and aside from a lot of the ovbious fears it came to light that i feel an enormous amount of pressure and i dont want hubby to feel like ive let him down or im not trying hard enough etc...if i dont get a job straight away....etc. i also told him that i feel crap and doubt myself completely. I knwo how to be a SAHM mom here. that is my job and Im really good at it (may as well toot my own horn! lol). Im confident in it and know exactly what to do and how to do it. i dont know how to be a working mother, in the USA. i feel completely out of my depth and frantic. so anyway..he took a lot of the pressure off by telling me that it was all just in my own head and he wouldnt absolutely not feel that way. anyway. it was good. so i feel a lot better about it.
anyway.
food today:
a/c porridge pancake that i didnt end up having yesterday!
pancake
chili w/broccoli
2 eggs w/broccoli
829/66
thats a bit more like it.
and im gonna ditch the broccoli once its gone. i have enough for today and tomorrow...and then thats it. its too much temptation and DOES lead me astray. sadly. so yeah.
thats that.
i had a coffee and im gonna go get my 1st water of the day.
here we go. AGAIN.
beelishy
......gettin' it done.
Eggs and broccoli (with a bit of hot sauce! yum!!) done. So delicious. And now having a choccy coffee and my 3rd pint water.
And.....Got an email from the birth certificate people to say that my order has shipped via UPS and is scheduled to be delivered on Monday. HUZZUH! Seriously. Incredibly much faster than I ever dreamed. Im so impressed!
And......Just applied for another job in Vegas. Well, sorta. anyway...fingers crossed!
Today is fantastic.
And now I need a nap! lol.
And.....Got an email from the birth certificate people to say that my order has shipped via UPS and is scheduled to be delivered on Monday. HUZZUH! Seriously. Incredibly much faster than I ever dreamed. Im so impressed!
And......Just applied for another job in Vegas. Well, sorta. anyway...fingers crossed!
Today is fantastic.
And now I need a nap! lol.
beelishy
......gettin' it done.
On my 5th pint of water for the day. just had my lunch...a/c porridge pancake. so yum...but my last one..sadly. i might go for just a box of 50 of those if/when it comes time to buy more packs. 4 of those per day (and nothing else) comes to 800 cals and 69 carbs. which is exactly perfect, really...for me. and it is incredibly filling. so yeah. once i get through at least half of what ive got in, i will think about how to continue.
i didnt get much of a nap....at all. just as i dropped off...the delivery guy rang the bell with my cat litter. waaahhh! and because he's nice i agreed to take in a parcel for a neighbour a few doors down. so i got back into bed with the girls and again...just as i was getting comfy...the flamin' bell went again and it was a rather unfortunate toady looking man come to claim his parcel. i only say that about his appearance because ...well..its true (im all about honesty, right?!) and also...ive never seen him around here before and you'd think that someone like that would...stand out. you know? so...if its not actually his parcel....oops! lol.
anyway. this bulge around my middle has got me in a right huff with myself. boo. all the more reason to stay on plan for more than...yanno...2 days in a row. ffs.
so ...i think im in need of naptime take2! hahahah
i think we will head in around 2:30 and try again. the girls are still working their way through their lunches and watching the wiggles. so once that winds down...we should be good to try again. zoe did sleep but not near long enough.
i didnt get much of a nap....at all. just as i dropped off...the delivery guy rang the bell with my cat litter. waaahhh! and because he's nice i agreed to take in a parcel for a neighbour a few doors down. so i got back into bed with the girls and again...just as i was getting comfy...the flamin' bell went again and it was a rather unfortunate toady looking man come to claim his parcel. i only say that about his appearance because ...well..its true (im all about honesty, right?!) and also...ive never seen him around here before and you'd think that someone like that would...stand out. you know? so...if its not actually his parcel....oops! lol.
anyway. this bulge around my middle has got me in a right huff with myself. boo. all the more reason to stay on plan for more than...yanno...2 days in a row. ffs.
so ...i think im in need of naptime take2! hahahah
i think we will head in around 2:30 and try again. the girls are still working their way through their lunches and watching the wiggles. so once that winds down...we should be good to try again. zoe did sleep but not near long enough.
beelishy
......gettin' it done.
Nope. Nap fail, again! lol. But its fine. Im up now and I have made a few inquiries with some medical negligence lawyers about hubbys situation. im not entirely sure he will be happy with me but honestly...i dont care. Lord knows it wouldnt be the first time! lol. Mostly they were either unhelpful or busy (one told me to ring back later. what happened to taking my name and number and ringing ME back?!) but one, Prolegal, have been good thus far. She took down all the gist of the story and said someone will be in touch. Im not sure whether or not we have a claim..or who it would be against..or anything. I just know that my husband took a tablet and it forever changed our lives. I could have lost him. And this was nowhere in the literature. We were in no way warned that this was ever a possibility. And no one seems to care. So. Yeah. The only draw back is that we will be coming up to 10 years since his diagnosis (Dec 2015 will be 10 years) and we may well have missed the boat, as they say. But its worth a shot, I suppose.
Lord knows it wouldnt be the first time! lol. Mostly they were either unhelpful or busy (one told me to ring back later. what happened to taking my name and number and ringing ME back?!) but one, Prolegal, have been good thus far. She took down all the gist of the story and said someone will be in touch. Im not sure whether or not we have a claim..or who it would be against..or anything. I just know that my husband took a tablet and it forever changed our lives. I could have lost him. And this was nowhere in the literature. We were in no way warned that this was ever a possibility. And no one seems to care. So. Yeah. The only draw back is that we will be coming up to 10 years since his diagnosis (Dec 2015 will be 10 years) and we may well have missed the boat, as they say. But its worth a shot, I suppose.
beelishy
......gettin' it done.
I told him and he's fine with it. Phew!
In other news...I have a tummy ache from heJJ. *cry* at least i dont want to eat, i suppose. i feel like ive eaten a whole sheep, as Lou would say. and im not sure why. must be TOTM related. If Im still feeling like this tomorrow and/or sunday...i may skip WI for the week and try again AFTER my period has been (and gone, maybe). I dont want to be put off by the silly numbers on the scales. The main focus for me should just be concentrating on staying on plan. The numbers will sort themselves after a time. And if I have hormonal etc stuff going on...I dont need that having a negative impact. Will think on it and see how i feel tomorrow x
Owwww. Myyy tummyyyyyy.
In other news...I have a tummy ache from heJJ. *cry* at least i dont want to eat, i suppose. i feel like ive eaten a whole sheep, as Lou would say. and im not sure why. must be TOTM related. If Im still feeling like this tomorrow and/or sunday...i may skip WI for the week and try again AFTER my period has been (and gone, maybe). I dont want to be put off by the silly numbers on the scales. The main focus for me should just be concentrating on staying on plan. The numbers will sort themselves after a time. And if I have hormonal etc stuff going on...I dont need that having a negative impact. Will think on it and see how i feel tomorrow x
Owwww. Myyy tummyyyyyy.
Lou_G
Gold Member
I've only been gone a day and I missed so much! Exciting news about the move decision, your OH is such a sweetheart aw
Would be nice to get some medical compensation to help along the way you've got nothing to lose
Hope your tum is feeling a bit better I hate that bloated feeling its horrible
I'm off to work have a great day xxx
Would be nice to get some medical compensation to help along the way
you've got nothing to lose Hope your tum is feeling a bit better I hate that bloated feeling its horrible
I'm off to work have a great day xxx
beelishy
......gettin' it done.
Morning
Down 1 whole pound. Woofknhoo. lol. 227. And WI is tomorrow. Ive decided to just have pancakes today. So eff it. I cant be bothered with anything else and if i just have pancakes...it means i can just clear my head completely of "what shall i have for lunch/dinner" ...cuz the answer its just.. pancake. Ive made them all this morning and thats it for the day.
the weather is sh!te today. 10C atm. Freezing. Pouring rain. Ugh. i had to actually change out of my PJ shorts and put on sleep pants and me fuzzy winter socks. this just isnt on. its fkn JULY nearly! :/
I cleaned out the medicine cupboard this morning. This sounds like a simple thing. but its so not. Hubby has LOADS of tablets in there. Along with all the other stuff that a normal family has...calpol....plasters....etc etc. It was getting ridiculous. So Ive tidied it all up and Ive told him that he needs to make an effort to keep it at least somewhat tidy. He goes in there every day, at least twice (for his meds) and its mainly him that needs to keep it in order. its not hard!
ive also put the sheets on to wash. I love clean beds!
right. trying desperately to put off having a pancake (i made lots of little ones again) but im so hungry. bleh. Im going to wait until 9:30 and then have one.
Down 1 whole pound. Woofknhoo. lol. 227. And WI is tomorrow. Ive decided to just have pancakes today. So eff it. I cant be bothered with anything else and if i just have pancakes...it means i can just clear my head completely of "what shall i have for lunch/dinner" ...cuz the answer its just.. pancake. Ive made them all this morning and thats it for the day.
the weather is sh!te today. 10C atm. Freezing. Pouring rain. Ugh. i had to actually change out of my PJ shorts and put on sleep pants and me fuzzy winter socks. this just isnt on. its fkn JULY nearly! :/
I cleaned out the medicine cupboard this morning. This sounds like a simple thing. but its so not. Hubby has LOADS of tablets in there. Along with all the other stuff that a normal family has...calpol....plasters....etc etc. It was getting ridiculous. So Ive tidied it all up and Ive told him that he needs to make an effort to keep it at least somewhat tidy. He goes in there every day, at least twice (for his meds) and its mainly him that needs to keep it in order. its not hard!
ive also put the sheets on to wash.
I love clean beds!right. trying desperately to put off having a pancake (i made lots of little ones again) but im so hungry. bleh. Im going to wait until 9:30 and then have one.
beelishy
......gettin' it done.
Ok. I found a new thing. Purely through being greedy. And hating waste. But mostly the greedy thing. Anyway..
I made Zoe a fried egg (fried in about a teaspoon of flora light) but apparently the yolk wasnt done enough because she prodded it and once it oozed she recoiled and walked away. LOL. So I says to meself "she's totally not gonna eat that". I went and got her a boiled one instead and then I had this sad little egg on a plate that no one loved. And it was already after 9:30 so i was due my pancakey breakfast. SO THATS WHEN IT HIT ME. Make a sandwich. HAHAHA. Yes, really. I figured it was either going to be OMG so good....or OMG REVOLTING.
It was OMG SO GOOD. And absolutely insanely filling. My pancakes were the size of crumpets anyway. So ..perfect. And I had 2 with the eggy sandwiched in between and it was lovely. So lovely Im going to have another one for dinner. Ups the cals a bit but im not terribly fussed.
I love when experiments go well. lol. *rubs full belly*
I made Zoe a fried egg (fried in about a teaspoon of flora light) but apparently the yolk wasnt done enough because she prodded it and once it oozed she recoiled and walked away. LOL. So I says to meself "she's totally not gonna eat that". I went and got her a boiled one instead and then I had this sad little egg on a plate that no one loved. And it was already after 9:30 so i was due my pancakey breakfast. SO THATS WHEN IT HIT ME. Make a sandwich. HAHAHA. Yes, really. I figured it was either going to be OMG so good....or OMG REVOLTING.
It was OMG SO GOOD. And absolutely insanely filling. My pancakes were the size of crumpets anyway. So ..perfect. And I had 2 with the eggy sandwiched in between and it was lovely. So lovely Im going to have another one for dinner. Ups the cals a bit but im not terribly fussed.
I love when experiments go well. lol. *rubs full belly*
beelishy
......gettin' it done.
hahah. omg. blackbird!! I love (hate!!) it! rofl!
it was surprising so nice. but its pretty common in the states for people to have a huuuge breakfast with pancakes and eggs and to kinda eat it together. i never have...but for the duration of this diet.....(THE REST OF MY PIGGIN LIFE, AT THIS RATE)...this is awesome. hahahah.
it was surprising so nice. but its pretty common in the states for people to have a huuuge breakfast with pancakes and eggs and to kinda eat it together. i never have...but for the duration of this diet.....(THE REST OF MY PIGGIN LIFE, AT THIS RATE)...this is awesome. hahahah.
Clinquant
Gold Member
It's really really hard. You have a lot going on and it makes it really difficult without food to resort to but I'd hate to see you undoing more of the good progress you have made. I know a lot of us are all or nothing but can you not do a sort of holding pattern with food which will allow you to enjoy healthy meals with the rest of the family and stop you feeling deprived for a while. You just haven't given yourself the benefit of ketosis so the calorie levels are almost impossible to sustain. There is nothing wrong with you. As I've probably said being on the brink of an overweight BMI when you've come so far is pretty scary too. It's easy to self sabotage. My Lighter Life counsellor said that she noticed a lot of people struggled at this point. It's a big identity crisis. I've had to look at this as a forever process to try and stop myself freaking out. It's also a big difference in terms of what we can get away with in terms of off piste days at 30 BMI than at 40.
You know we are not afraid of warts and all struggling here so if you are getting any benefit from being here then stay and post. Do the kindest thing for yourself.
You know we are not afraid of warts and all struggling here so if you are getting any benefit from being here then stay and post. Do the kindest thing for yourself.
beelishy
......gettin' it done.
Im going to have a read back around my restart in sept last year. and see if that doesnt light a fire under me arze and also give me an idea of how to make it work. i was doing something taht just worked perfectly for me. but i cant remember what it is. and i have to just get my head back in the game...because if i dont i WILL just pile more and more back on. and that is NOT going to happen. I wanted to be at GOAL by my birthday in sept...not back to square 1 !!!!!
So off I go..trawling back through my diary.
So off I go..trawling back through my diary.
beelishy
......gettin' it done.
Ok. I had a read from back on the 1st of sept. and apparently i really got into the groove in october. and a typical day looked like this :
S&S Chili
Exante plain Porridge
3 boiled eggs
2 babybel lights
150g quorn pieces with mushrooms and green beans
1 pot sf jelly
coffee, water
Cals 799 Carbs 49
Or this:
Exante shake (banana with a pinch of cinnamon added)
2-3 boiled eggs
2 babybel lights
S&S spag bol
Quorn and peppers
sf jelly
coffee, water
Cals 849 Carbs 52 (this is with 2 eggs...)
So basically -
an exante pack, a SnS pack, quorn & mushrooms for evening meal, 2 babybels and 2 eggs and a sf jelly for evening snack. and my usual coffee and water.
Tomorrow my asda delivery is coming and ive just added to it the bits that i will need.
S&S Chili
Exante plain Porridge
3 boiled eggs
2 babybel lights
150g quorn pieces with mushrooms and green beans
1 pot sf jelly
coffee, water
Cals 799 Carbs 49
Or this:
Exante shake (banana with a pinch of cinnamon added)
2-3 boiled eggs
2 babybel lights
S&S spag bol
Quorn and peppers
sf jelly
coffee, water
Cals 849 Carbs 52 (this is with 2 eggs...)
So basically -
an exante pack, a SnS pack, quorn & mushrooms for evening meal, 2 babybels and 2 eggs and a sf jelly for evening snack. and my usual coffee and water.
Tomorrow my asda delivery is coming and ive just added to it the bits that i will need.
beelishy
......gettin' it done.
Yes...its has helped me in the past to find the motivation and the encouragement that I seem to lose now and then.
I have to nip this in the bud before I do anymore damage and gain anymore weight. So Im going to give this a try. i do remember feeling like there was almost always something i could have if i got peckish. And considering my current mindset and how/why ive been struggling lately...i think that is a good thing. So...here's to tomorrow. Im just going to take tomorrow for whatever it is...and log it as my first WI....i AM all about honesty, afterall. So it will be a gain for the week...but its ok. I will make progress, hopefully, this week. I dont see how I could NOT, provided i stick to this plan. And i have lots of "normal" bits to have....quorn meal for dinner....babybels (cheese!) and sf jelly and eggs. So ...maybe this will help me get back into my groove. I really do miss that.
And I just wanted to thank you guys for sticking around and for your support, understanding and encouragement xxx It really means so much to me x
I have to nip this in the bud before I do anymore damage and gain anymore weight. So Im going to give this a try. i do remember feeling like there was almost always something i could have if i got peckish. And considering my current mindset and how/why ive been struggling lately...i think that is a good thing. So...here's to tomorrow. Im just going to take tomorrow for whatever it is...and log it as my first WI....i AM all about honesty, afterall. So it will be a gain for the week...but its ok. I will make progress, hopefully, this week. I dont see how I could NOT, provided i stick to this plan. And i have lots of "normal" bits to have....quorn meal for dinner....babybels (cheese!) and sf jelly and eggs. So ...maybe this will help me get back into my groove. I really do miss that.
And I just wanted to thank you guys for sticking around and for your support, understanding and encouragement xxx It really means so much to me x
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