Beelishy's VLCD Weight Loss Adventure!!

Didnt get to see Paddington today as it was icy and freezing cold (Ice scares me sh!tless...i seriously cant deal.) ...omg so so cold. lol. and....we desperately needed some shopping. So I went to Morrisons instead with T. How dreadfully boring. but...tickets are pre-booked for Paddington tomorrow. 10am. yay. lol.


So it appears we are having pizza (or some kinda take away) on NYE (i am NOT cooking) and then Im making a repeat of christmas dinner for NY day. AND THEN IM NEVER EATING ANYTHING AGAIN.....because FAT!!! :D
 
Happy New Year!!

Tempted to start a new diary but at the same time...why should i? Its still the same journey....so..here I am.

havent started back on plan because, frankly, cant afford packs yet. But Im going to try to sort out finances today and hopppppeeeeeefullly....by the end of the month (or the middle, even better lol) I may be able to place an order and get the ball rolling. Am thinking i will go for chili and spag bol from SnS and pancakes/porridge from the 4 a day plan on exante...and mix as i had been. not bothering with bars and probably not many shakes (if any). and that is my plan for the year, going forward. But...today...New Year's Day lunch/dinner is happening. Chkn for hubby.....and mash, roasties, sprouts, broc and cauli, yorkshires and stuffing for the rest of us. But toomorrow...im going to start by trying to cut back on the rubbish and eventually cut it out all together in preparation for getting back on plan. AND....up the water intake. it has been pretty non-existent. shameful really.

Also, i need to get some scales. I am very attached to the omron ones that i had before..even bought another set in the states. lol. so i will have to order a new set of them as well.
 
ive never been brave enough to try coconut flour. lol go you!

also....this. :/ yep.jpg
 
Oops! That looks like a bit of a mess!

Happy new year...I've been in hiding for a while but have kept following your diary and can I just say how brave and strong you are with all the moves etc in your life, you seem to have kept your head through difficult times for your babies...you may not be the weight you want to be but you're an inspiration none the less...
 
Welcome Dietninja!

Thank you for your incredibly kind words. Really. And thank you for finally posting and saying hello :)

This community is great...nowhere else will you find people who REALLY understand what its like to struggle the way we do. And it is a constant struggle, for me anyway. And as Lou said...most likely a life-long battle.

In fact, I was just on my way over to MFP again to look back at my food logs and see if I can cobble together some kind of plan to get started. And I need to get to boots and finally weigh myself...until I can get my scales ordered. I will probably do that (boots) tomorrow.
 
Whoops on those scales. I'm weighing tomorrow and I fully expect mine to explode too.

And Dietninja is right. You have done amazingly with everything you have gone through this year. It was brave to make the move in the first place but even braver to admit you were better off here and come back.

Hope 2015 is going to be a fantastic one for you and your family and looking forward to us all being in the zone again whatever that zone is going to be!
 
Thanks Clin! :D We can definitely do it. And Im sure one way or another, we will! :D


Also...just to clarify - that wasnt me on those scales (LOL)...although I kinda wish Boots had cattle scales so I didnt feel completely panicked that Im going to break theirs when I hop on them tomorrow. ha!
 
Ha! That picture is probably exactly what mine will do when I start on Monday!

If I had a closer boots I would definitely do that too! I seem to remember for 20p it tells you everything! Weight, body fat, water % etc etc it's fab because one week weight might not change but body fat may have gone down! I once gained weight but reduced body fat so I was still happy!!
Happy new year btw
 
I think my local has gone up to 80p but it was 20p when i first moved here 10 years ago. And it does tell you everything but i havent ever bothered with anything beyond weight....i might have a go though!

the scales i buy - omron ones - they have a body fat calculator and other fancy schmancy little features...and i started out (when i got my first set the year T was born...so 2009) using the body fat thing too. but this was before i had found a diet that actually worked and that i actually stuck with for any period of time. so i used the body fat bit...but there wasnt much change because i wasnt being successful on my "diets". but i would imagine that it would change drastically and quickly whilst on vlcd. would be interesting to track it.

anyway....just had the dreaded (and final) takeaway (pizza...of course) and im researching and trying to cobble together some kind of plan. still. yep...working on a diet plan while stuffing my fat head with pizza. WIN! (total fail, really). lol.
 
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So I think hubby has pretty much had enough of me hmphfffing and sighing and working on this diet stuff and trying to figure out things and do calculations and research past attempts/diary timelines...etc. Its been frustrating and Im pretty mad at myself, frankly. I have pretty much decided that at the end of the month Im going to order a "pick your own 60 for £60" of exante stuff - provided that offer is still going on (which it probably wont be, but they will have something similar im sure. boxes of 50 for £50 or another pick your own deal...or a Penny sale or something) But anyway...i think he's kinda sick of me right now so he's told me to "just order a box of 60 and the scales and get on with it". lol. I havent. Because I just have this massive pang of guilt. We arent skint...but we still havent gotten on quite an even keel yet, financially. And i want some furniture from ikea (expedit/billy bookcases type stuff...inexpensive but brilliant) to do up the spare room as our education/play room. And there the matter of his birthday is the 29th of this month. I know thats going to basically just consist of a very small gift ("from the girls") and we will bake him a cake. So not much of an expense really. But there is also some other financial crap we have to sort out. (isnt there always?!) So. not really much in the way of disposable income...certainly not for something that is just for me and can be considered a frivolous purchase. So. I dont know. Argh.
 
Just my tuppence worth....It's not frivolous and its a darn sight cheaper than eating real food / eating out...and if it helps make you feel positive and takes away some stress...

But that's what I think, anyway. In the end only you can make that decision....
 
No, youre right...i completely get that. I think the same. On one hand. But theres that little voice, always....telling me that I should come second to my kids/hubby/us as a family. lol. so Im kinda battling that.

In other news...I just had (because...why not right? ugh) a sachet of the heaps of fruit porridge. it was cherry and apple. (i also bought the blueberry/banana and stawb/banana ones as they were all on offer at morrisons but not had them yet) OMG. so nice! and filling. porridge has NEVER been filling for me. so i think that tomorrow...im going to get weighed at boots. Then try to wangle together a little food plan

3x porridges
3x boiled eggs
100g quorn chkn pieces (cooked in a little stock powder/water and a smidge of tomato paste) with a few mushrooms

not counting the milk i will use for the porridge....as i might use water instead.....

it comes to 772/81


(note: i just plugged in 180mls of milk, which is what i would use (half milk and half water per sachet) and it takes the numbers to 862/90 which is probably a good place to start...especially since ive been SUCH a carb fiend lately.)
 
Morning.

Hubby goes back to work today. I had a bit of a fitful night...kept thinking (even subconsciously!) about what to do..and plans...and ugh. And Ive woken up with cramps....TOTM is on its way within the next few days...which isnt helping matters!


I really have hit a wall.
 
Oh dear. Just got back from boots and it is terrible...horrible...awful news. Seriously. I cried. I expected worse...but I cried anyway.

18st 1lb !!!! :( = 253lbs. Thats 39lbs (2st 11lbs) Ive put on....from my lowest low of 214. And about 20lbs gained from what I was when I left to head over to the USA.

*sob*

Im angry at myself. Im disappointed. Im sad for myself....sad that I still havent learned - that not a whole lot has changed. admittedly, I know that pre-vlcd it would have been a bigger gain. And I have, at times, tried to be mindful of what I was having and how much...So I suppose thats a small victory. But the overall picture is that I still put it on. Lots. And pretty quickly. *sigh*

So, now that Ive had a big, ugly, cry of anger and sadness.....MOVING ON. Im going to figure something out and get this regain shifted. And then get the rest shifted. And get to goal. Enough already.
 
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