Blonde Logic's Stream of Consciousness/Diary

HI Angie!!! I remember you - its nice to hear from you. I was just thinking about Porgeous the other day - I don;t see her on here much these days? Is she still postin on the CD board? I may pop over and say hello!!!

Thank you for your comments and I am sorry you too lostyou parents in a traumatic way. Its bad enough to lose a parent but add trauma and its about the worst thing I have ever been through and cant imagine anything worse. Well they say what doesnt kill us makes us stronger..... and I believe that coming out the other side....I can see where I was and where i am now and its miles apart. I definately reccomend you get some counseling - it helped me immensely. I suffered with my dads death and greived improperly for nearly 10-12 years, so getting this help straigt away has meadea a huge difference. I would not say I am over it because you never are - but I am dealing with it much better and in a much healthier way now....long may it last. Anyway - enough sad stuff.... :)

Pop over here ANYTIME - you know me from before - I am dead serious and deadly committed (at last!) to getting back to goal and there is nothing that will get in my way to stop me. May get iny way - but wont stop me. :) I haven;t posted any pics on here for a longtime. But i was looking through one of my albums yesterday and remembering how I felt in alll those new clothes. Its getting exciting knowing I will be back in them soon. :)

We did this once- we can do it again!!! :)

xxx
 
Morning BL. Lovely to see cheery posts from you! And inpspiring you are on track again. It's then getting on and staying on which is hard. Yes, I;m still struggling but hey today's another day!

ps My husband is a "cowboy" well that's what I thought when I saw him in his cowboy hat for the first time! A Texan from Houston. I'd always seen him in a suit so didn't have that stereoptypical vision of "Dallas" and cowboys in my head! Until I saw him in hat!! I am so mean!"
 
Hi BL,

Happy Weekend!
 
Blonde Logic said:
Morning everyone! Kira, i will have to tell a funny tale one day about a drive through texas I did once.....that is one huge state!!

How are you Mel? How are things going with your dad??

x
Click to expand...

Slowing improving thanks.

I drove across Texad once... OMG... THREE DAYS OF NOTHING!!!!
 
Hello! Just wanted to come on and add my encouragement. I was on LL five years ago and I was addicted to your posts on Minimins (you were my saviour on a number of occasions!). I was always a lurker so you probably don't remember me. You were seriously important to me though so thanks so very much!
Best wishes
 
Hi BL -- I hope you're well! Mel X
 
Hi Linze - thank you so much for such a nice comment - that makes me feel good. I do remember your name, but my memory over the last few years has deteriorated at an alarming rate!! lol That makes me feel good if I was able to help you in any way. And it means alot your sharing tht with me - thank you. :) How are you now and how are you going?

Hi Mel and Kira! I am fine - been a very busy time at home with a poorly husband (hurt back - not serious) who has been home under my feet wor 2 weeks now! Making me a little crazy! LOL But I am doing good....weight still going in the right direction and getting back in to more nad moreclothes - it really feels like its shifting now! Nearly there!

How are you two? Mel how is your father - are you still stateside? I so hope things are much much better now.

Have a wonderful day everyone - I feel the earliest tinge of autumn in the air now and that makes me so happy!!! :)

xxxxxxxxx
 
AWh! BL so glad you are doing well! Your poor hubbie though! Hope he's on the mend. It's great seeing your ticker going down! I've faffed, got depressed more depressed pulled myself together and down again. The usual! Today though feeling a better as I got through a day yesterday. I wont' give up! It's the inpiration you and some of the other ladies gives that keeps me going. x
 
Sometimes you just have to look at this as one day at a time. It's such a challenge on the best of days, but if you are having emotional ups and downs that makes it so much more difficult. Weight loss ad depression certainly go hand in hand and create such a unhealthy cycle - am I over eating because I am depressed - or am I depressed because I am fat - these two statements have gotten so much air time in my head over the years it's ridiculous. lol

Hang in there - just know that with every pound you lose, your mood will improve slighlty, all adding up to good losses and a happier mental outlook. It takes time, but is worth it once we get there. Have another great day. :) xx
 
I can totally agree with/echo what you've said about the depression-eating-weight-depression cycle. That's me to a T!

I didn't realise last year that maintenance would be such a rollercoaster. I think I learn from every up and down... and am making progress... but part of me so much wanted it to be "done" when I reached goal weight. I realise now that maintenance is ongoing and I will never be "done"...
 
Hi Spangly! :) That is unfortunately the real truth of this whole thing - we will never be "done". <sigh>

For me too it was a botter pill to swallow when I realised that in order to live like a naturally slim person, you have to be born a naturally slim person. :/ I am sure this is not the case for some - I believe it depends on how and why we got overweight to being with. My reasons were clearly head issues....so it will be a lifelong battle - or challenge as I prefer to say more positively - which yes, is dissappointing - but knowing that is half the battle I suppose.

It'll be harder work then we have liked, hey? But worthwhile. :)

xx
 
Hi BL,

That's my issue -- maintaining. YoyoMel c'est moi.

I'm back for now. I flew back to the UK arriving on the 22nd, then promptly sorted a family holiday before school starts -- so, I was back a few days then we drove to Hollandand spen five days at Centre Parcs. Shopped in Calais on our way over, and toured Zaan Schans (famous windmills) and stopped in Bruges on the way back for a brief walkm tour and canal, boat ride.

Now, I'm off to Portugal for a "ladies' trip" that was planned months ago (before my father fell ill).

Anyway, he is in a rehabilitation center getting healthier so that he dn ave his hip replaced. That won't be until mid-October at the soonest (I thnk).

Thanks for asking.

I hope your OH is okay.
 
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Me too, MinnieMel. I'm back again, doing sns this time (cost). Really focused and determined though. BL - I think we're about the same distance from goal! (Or rather, should I say, "the same closeness to" goal?)

Glass half full (of a shake) of course! :)
 
Spanglymum said:
Me too, MinnieMel. I'm back again, doing sns this time (cost). Really focused and determined though. BL - I think we're about the same distance from goal! (Or rather, should I say, "the same closeness to" goal?)

Glass half full (of a shake) of course! :)
Click to expand...

Lol - raising a shake to you.
 
Hello ladies - how is everyone!!?? Hows your dad Mel?

I am really starting to struggle a bit. Nothing too outrageous - but I am bored bored bored - I need to really reach deep for this last leg.....I seem to have reacheda bit of an impass - I am a bit picky at things I shouldn;t - so am basically just treading water. I dontknow what my problem is. But me no likey.

I need to get it all back together again, my groove has gotten a little wobbly. Must deal before it gets harder and harder. I amNOTgoing to give up for anything - I just don;t know why I am messing about.

Hey ho.

Have a good weekeveryone.

Sorry about typos - this ancient laptops keyboard is rubbish and the space bar doesn;t always work.

xx
 
Blonde Logic said:
Hello ladies - how is everyone!!?? Hows your dad Mel?

I am really starting to struggle a bit. Nothing too outrageous - but I am bored bored bored - I need to really reach deep for this last leg.....I seem to have reacheda bit of an impass - I am a bit picky at things I shouldn;t - so am basically just treading water. I dontknow what my problem is. But me no likey.

I need to get it all back together again, my groove has gotten a little wobbly. Must deal before it gets harder and harder. I amNOTgoing to give up for anything - I just don;t know why I am messing about.

Hey ho.

Have a good weekeveryone.

Sorry about typos - this ancient laptops keyboard is rubbish and the space bar doesn;t always work.

xx
Click to expand...

Thanks for asking BL. He is improving day by day. I am hoping he'll be fit enough to get his hip fixed by the third week in October -- if not sooner.
 
Evening BL! I'm hardly one to be giving out advice given my own struggles of actually getting back on vlcd track but I can say is don' give up. I've been reading a downloaed book from Brain over binge recommended by Annie Annie as it has really helped me but yesterday bless lovely amazing AnnieA she put a link on my diary which really helped rational.org its about AVRT Addiction Voice Recognition Therarpy. Now I am sceptical usually of all this stuff I did like Gillian Riley but the AVRT on this rational.org site had 28 bullets points which is really aimed at alcoholics or drug users but it was so helpful to apply it to food/bingeing overeating. I am being very long winded about this but what i am trying to say is I have been trying ignore that little voice in my little brain/animal brain. I think in LL they made reference to a petulant child?

Anyway, the bullets point were great for me today because even though in ketosis I have had that niggly feeling of wanting to pick. Sorry, I have gone on but I hope what I've bashed out on the keyboard makes some sort of sense! Just don't go back where you don't want to be honey. xx
 
Totally agree about AVRT, kira. It's a really simple but very effective way of stopping unhelpful behaviours in their tracks. (not meaning to hijack but wanted to add my four penn'orth!)
 
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