Cambridge daily diary
- Thread starter hellyhartley
- Start date
hellyhartley
Full Member
LazarusD said:Holidayyou'll do great mate x
I hope so chuck!!
hellyhartley
Full Member
Oh my days! I live the gym at 4 in the morning. You can use and play with any machine you like and can stay on it for hours and run like a spaz and no-one will see! Yeah!!!!! Feel better after burning off all those nasty calories! Mwahahahaha! X
LindyLou59
Member
Another 3lb off this week - really pleased as had a "naughty" weekend (foodwise ! lol ) x
hellyhartley
Full Member
LindyLou59 said:
Wow, that's fab Hun!! Xxxx
LindyLou59
Member
Thanks ! Were you really at the gym at 4 in the morning ?? xx
xx
hellyhartley
Full Member
LindyLou59 said:Thanks ! Were you really at the gym at 4 in the morning ??
Haha yeah, I work until the wee small hours so I'm wide awake at that sort of time. It's great! You can try all the machines you're too embarrassed to use when other people are around!!
The vibrating plate thing had absolutely knackered my and though :/
hellyhartley
Full Member
*has knackered my abs though. Stupid phone!!
hellyhartley
Full Member
Oh god, done too much at the gym, feeling sick as a dog and can't be sick. Really can't stomach my last shake. It's not going down well at all. I'm going to bed.
MushMachine
Member
if in doubt, sleep! you will be okay - you are doing amazing!!!! XX
hellyhartley
Full Member
So after Thursday evening doing too much at the gym and having to go to bed early, I spent yesterday completely ruining my whole weeks work. I had to go to liverpool for a meeting so got a lift in with my husband and agreed to meet him for lunch. I got my bar out to take with me and somehow managed to leave it on the kitchen table. When I realised this I decided that to save face I'd order a chicken salad. What follows is everything I can remember eating yesterday...
-Chicken and veg skewer with small fries and half a tortilla
-A iced bun
-chicken crisps
-Small chips, small sausage and curry sauce
-skinny muffin dessert pot
-about 10 chocolate cookies
-2 slices of cheese on toast
The reason I started this diary was so I could make myself accountable everyday for what I do and how I feel.
Today I feel a)absolutely disgusted with myself and b)completely beyond help for the rest of this week. I won't cheat again, I know that, but I don't have enough time to undo it at the gym.
What I don't understand is why I couldn't stop. I had my lunch and felt guilty, then when I was picking my iced bun and crisps from m&s I could have chosen chicken breast or salad but didn't. When I got home I could have just had my evening shake but didn't, I got chips and sausage by the time I'd eaten that I felt really full but carried on having dessert and then biscuits! Later on I'd spotted the kitchen unoccupied and carried on with cheese on toast!! By that point there was no guilt, no worry about the fact I felt sick I was so full. I just couldn't conceive of not having it. After this I sat feeling absolutely sick and bloated to the point of being uncomfortable, then the guilt came back.
Why the hell did I do this?!?!?!
I'm baffled as to how I've lost my focus so much! I have just over a week before this wedding that I have my dress for and when I tried it on last night it was uncomfortably tight again. I was so happy to have nothing but my cambridge packs before but this week Ive felt weepy and exhausted and deprived.
I know all I can do at this point is carry on and try not to do it again but the guilt is making me feel like I'm back at square one.
I'm going to tell my CDC all of this and will just have to accept a gain or maintain this week. It's getting depressing that I'm still in the 12st bracket for the 4th week running. It's my fault though. I have the opportunity to be thin and I'm squandering it.
It'll be a while before I feel happy with myself. :'(
-Chicken and veg skewer with small fries and half a tortilla
-A iced bun
-chicken crisps
-Small chips, small sausage and curry sauce
-skinny muffin dessert pot
-about 10 chocolate cookies
-2 slices of cheese on toast
The reason I started this diary was so I could make myself accountable everyday for what I do and how I feel.
Today I feel a)absolutely disgusted with myself and b)completely beyond help for the rest of this week. I won't cheat again, I know that, but I don't have enough time to undo it at the gym.
What I don't understand is why I couldn't stop. I had my lunch and felt guilty, then when I was picking my iced bun and crisps from m&s I could have chosen chicken breast or salad but didn't. When I got home I could have just had my evening shake but didn't, I got chips and sausage by the time I'd eaten that I felt really full but carried on having dessert and then biscuits! Later on I'd spotted the kitchen unoccupied and carried on with cheese on toast!! By that point there was no guilt, no worry about the fact I felt sick I was so full. I just couldn't conceive of not having it. After this I sat feeling absolutely sick and bloated to the point of being uncomfortable, then the guilt came back.
Why the hell did I do this?!?!?!
I'm baffled as to how I've lost my focus so much! I have just over a week before this wedding that I have my dress for and when I tried it on last night it was uncomfortably tight again. I was so happy to have nothing but my cambridge packs before but this week Ive felt weepy and exhausted and deprived.
I know all I can do at this point is carry on and try not to do it again but the guilt is making me feel like I'm back at square one.
I'm going to tell my CDC all of this and will just have to accept a gain or maintain this week. It's getting depressing that I'm still in the 12st bracket for the 4th week running. It's my fault though. I have the opportunity to be thin and I'm squandering it.
It'll be a while before I feel happy with myself. :'(
hellyhartley
Full Member
Had my breakfast (porridge) and chilli soup for tea, going to save my last pack (1/2 choc, 1/2 coconut) to take to work and when I finished I'm going to hit the gym really HARD!!
The least I can do is try to tone up a little more before weigh in and get back into ketosis.
The least I can do is try to tone up a little more before weigh in and get back into ketosis.
hellyhartley
Full Member
Fill up on water H and don't best yourself up x **** happens so just push past it and get that motivation back
Sent from my iPhone using MiniMins
Y I NO lose as fast?!?!? Oh yeah, eating's cheating!! Thanks hun xx
LindyLou59
Member
Honey, try not to beat yourself up too much - it's a blip that's all. You just have to try to regain your focus, draw a line under what's happened and move forward. You can't "uneat" anything so just start over and begin a new day. Feeling guilty will just bring you down and make you either want to eat more as a comfort or punish yourself by not eating at all and over working at the gym, neither of which is good for you. What's done is done, you won't have regained ALL the weight you've lost in one days mistake so stick with it and you'll be fine. Take care, big hugs xx
hellyhartley
Full Member
LindyLou59 said:
Thanks for your support hun, I'm feeling miles better now, just need to get a good loss next week before this bloody wedding! I'm planning to eat whilst I'm there but I'm going to be good as I don't want to undo any of my hard work and also I have a dress to fit into on the 3rd day there!
I went to the gym again last night so at least I've had a good workout before weigh in. I hope I haven't put any on.
How are you anyway lovie? How are you getting on? Xx
LindyLou59
Member
Not too bad - hasn't been a great week as my Nan fell and broke her hip so I had to go up to Norfolk and stay up there for a few days didn't have any bars or ready made shakes so was having to be REALLY careful - not expecting great things this week either but couldn't be helped.
Glad to hear you're feeeling a little bit better, even if we stay the same this week it's not a gain - hope you enjoy the wedding and I'm sure your dress will look fab ! x
Glad to hear you're feeeling a little bit better, even if we stay the same this week it's not a gain - hope you enjoy the wedding and I'm sure your dress will look fab ! x
LindyLou59
Member
2lb off this week - which I was very pleased with considering the horrendous week I've had ! x
x
MushMachine
Member
yes, don't feel bad - it happens to most of us! and you have to think, like you've only had 3 real meals in almost a month! give yourself a break and get back on it. i did naughty this weekend at the Indian - and then punished myself with back to back classes at the gym yesterday! but it's still coming off, even if it's just a bit slower - and the cheating is so sexy compared to another bloody leek and potato lumpy soup puuuuke!
hellyhartley
Full Member
Hi Honey, so sorry to hear about your nan, I hope she's feeling better now. It's great that you could be focussed on sticking to healthy foods when you have all that worry and stress going on. I think I'd have put it aside for a bit, but I'm an emotional eater and that sort of thing would have put me off being good. 2lbs loss is fantastic!!! Considering you've been off the shakes, that's great!! I'm sure the last 32lbs will melt off nice and quick for you!! Here's to next week eh?!
xxSimilar threads
