Chapter Now Closed :D

[JanD]

Anyways - ill be back full time here tuesday - sorry ive not been around much but prepare for more tanyaness :giggle: xxx

Look forward to it xx

 

[summergurl]

Ok i cant handle this any more - im seriously considering getting back on TFR and getting down to around 6/7stone ..... im just not sure i can handle being any more flat chested ............. i was happy at 11st6 ... and im not weighing untill next sat after 4 days on strict diet but still i feel like such a failure such a fat cow and all i want to do is cry. Stevie (the bf) is getting fed up of me saying 'do i look fat' 'im a fat b**ch aint i' i think sometimes hes at breaking point with me constantly asking do i look fat, am i fat, do i have a double chin etc etc

I duno what to do all i want is to be skinny and happy but sometimes im just not 'happy' :cry: :cry: :cry: :cry:

 

[JanD]

Awwwwwww Ta-aaaaan :hug99::hug99::hug99:

S'ard inni' kid? We're forever sayin 'I was happy when ..... ' not sure it's really true or whether it's 'grass is always greener' syndrome. Either way you're feeling pretty sh1tty right now but you KNOW it's only temporary. Try to just hang on in there until your head's in the right place again - it WILL get there .... promise xxx

 

[Scotsmist]

Ok i cant handle this any more - im seriously considering getting back on TFR and getting down to around 6/7stone ..... im just not sure i can handle being any more flat chested ............. i was happy at 11st6 ... and im not weighing untill next sat after 4 days on strict diet but still i feel like such a failure such a fat cow and all i want to do is cry. Stevie (the bf) is getting fed up of me saying 'do i look fat' 'im a fat b**ch aint i' i think sometimes hes at breaking point with me constantly asking do i look fat, am i fat, do i have a double chin etc etc

I duno what to do all i want is to be skinny and happy but sometimes im just not 'happy' :cry: :cry: :cry: :cry:

Oh Tanya.....I am so sorry!!!! I really am....dont go down that route, it just isnt worth it.

You are absolutely gorgeous and have done so well and lost so much weight.

I cant even help because I felt the same way, and TFR is so easy in comparison to maintaining, etc....but dont get to the point I am at again. Maybe you need to go and see someone to talk about some body image issues????

Not sure if I am helping, jumping around,not saying much, but I am routing for you and hope you just have the blues, and nothing more.....take care and sure Jan will be on to give more advice!!!

Take care and stop being so negative about yourself..you are such a pretty girl with your whole life ahead of you!! Enjoy it and try and relax with that new body of yours.

 

[summergurl]

Oh girls i just dont know - sometimes i look in the mirror and feel sick at the sight of myself

I KNOW i have come a loooong way since this time last year but i still cant actually see it.

Honestly, some days i feel like just giving up food all together and i actually think this is what im guna do.

Muesli breakie
Salad lunch
chicken/fish & veg dinner

Cane the gym and wii fit plus.

I feel like having one big :sigh: cuz sometimes its not just myself i am unhappy with and it pains me to say it so i cant actually say 'it' but my head is a little all over the place at the minute and i dont think thats helping one bit.

aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

had to just scream lol

 

[JanD]

Oh Dear ... All we can really do at the mo is offer you loads of virtual *****hugs***** when you need them xxx

 

[summergurl]

I will appreciate every single virtual hug right now

When im ready to talk about whats going on i will but i think thats the main 'problem' with why im so distorted looking in the mirror .... how silly does that sound right?!!!! :sigh:

Im sooooooooo glad you guys are here i would really be lost without this place

 

[Scotsmist]

Tanya

Has something significant happened..have you had a row/fall out with your b/f or a friend?? Or is it just life in general, with your job, etc????? Try and find out what it is that is making you feel this way, cause it just doesnt sound like you.

Look at your signature....8 stone sweetie, 8 stone! No 8 lb.......you need your head and your heart to get into alignment somehow.
You have done so well, and I suppose with all the booze, choc, and everything so readily available it is easy to lose control.....says her that did lose control completely!

Please Tanya dont go there! You are only hurting yourself, no one else......stopping eating isnt actually helping. I know that sounds contradictory with me going back on TFR.....but, I think for you, you are proving to yourself and everyone else you can do this. But, like you say, you are unhappy, and there are no doubt things you maybe need to confront!!!

Oh, my heart does go out to you..big hugs!!

 

[summergurl]

Has something significant happened..have you had a row/fall out with your b/f or a friend?? Or is it just life in general, with your job, etc????? Try and find out what it is that is making you feel this way, cause it just doesnt sound like you.

Significant yes ..... but actually happened .... not yet. Im reasessing but i just dont know where i am, what i feel, how to feel, what to do - like i say im totally confused, 100% in limbo. One minute im happy the next im so sad and unhappy i just dont know how to feel or think and i feel totally blank about everything i just dont know what to do.

I always turned to food and it scares me as i know im doing exactly that which is why i cant wait to get back to work, to a routine and back to normality :sigh: :flirt2:

 

[JanD]

Doesn't sound silly at all .... It's obviously an emotional time and us with eating issues always turn to food a these times, compounding the emotional issues .... viscious circle or what?

Still huggin' ya kiddo xxx

 

[summergurl]

Still huggin' ya kiddo xxx

thanks jan ..... just what i need right now

I duno what else to say right now besides thanks and lol

I think major changes are on the cards but i dont have the 'balls' to do anything about it!!!

Don't ya just hate the hands life deals you sometimes?

It's like being dealt a 10 and a 6 in blackjack .... limbo - what the hell do you do?!!!!!!!!! :sigh:

 

[Scotsmist]

It is how we deal with things..us foody people.......gorge and try and forget what we really need to deal with....just one of those things we have lived with probably most of our lives.

You will get to that point of where you can face what you need to face. I have been there many a time, and dont delay is all I will say, as much as it will be painful! I put off doing something for 7 years!! What a waste of my life...just not worth it.......

Like Jan said, BIG HUGS to you....
:gen126::gen126::gen126::gen126::gen126::gen126::gen126:

 

[JanD]

It's like being dealt a 10 and a 6 in blackjack .... limbo - what the hell do you do?!!!!!!!!! :sigh:

Well one things for sure - you ain't gonna win with that hand so you have to do something!

I'd say get rid of that hand and deal yourself another ....... ?! xx

 

[summergurl]

It is how we deal with things..us foody people.......gorge and try and forget what we really need to deal with....just one of those things we have lived with probably most of our lives.

You will get to that point of where you can face what you need to face. I have been there many a time, and dont delay is all I will say, as much as it will be painful! I put off doing something for 7 years!! What a waste of my life...just not worth it.......

Like Jan said, BIG HUGS to you....
:gen126::gen126::gen126::gen126::gen126::gen126::gen126:

Thanks

 

[JanD]

Hell - never said it was easy .... nothing worthwhile ever is ... more's the pity. xxx

 

[summergurl]

Hmmmm ...... :sigh:

 

[JanD]

:girlpower::hug99::hug99:xx

 

[summergurl]

:girlpower::hug99::hug99:xx

:giggle: ..... see Jan ... you always whack a smile on my face! lol

Honestly i cant thank you guys enough - sometimes my friends would prod me till i spilt the beans but its so nice to get what im feeling off my chest without explaining anything! Yous really are the best *thumbs up* !!!!!!!!!!!!!

:sign0168:

 

[JanD]

No probs ... I'll whack yer any time ya like .... :copon: xxx

 

[summergurl]