Here i am! *waves* - Brewin'a'Baby & Staying Slim! 2011 xx

[Littleslimmingbee]

Not getting on to well.

i had some random stranger call me fat on thursday and i ended up binging all day long followed by a dominoes. Iv been on track since then but doubt iv lost anything.

Feeling a bit down at the mo and internets gone bust at our house so im feeling a bit alone with out you all. x

 

[Littleslimmingbee]

hey guys

im still here but still no internet at ours ;(

i sts last week, thankfully.. and am trying to get back on track. weeks going well, and iv been trying fish this week..after reading the fishy thread!

had our first bbq yday, went fab but deffo off plan. back on it today..fingers x'd for another sts wednesday!

be back soon xxxxxxx

 

[xGeordieGirlx]

Hope your week is going well Fern

Fingers crossed your net gets sorted soon!! xx

 

[NikkiP]

Hey love, been reading your diary and am amazed at how well you have done and how much you have achieved. Just wanted to say I'm sorry you're going through a rough time at the moment, sometimes it feels that all we wake up to is bad news and life can seem very cruel. But there will be good times ahead. As for the person who called you fat, there are no words, or polite ones that I can put on here. Just don't let the ******* grind you down and don't let one idiot ruin your day xx

 

[Littleslimmingbee]

hey everybody ....thanks for catching with me, imglad i havnt been forgotten lol!

as you all know iv not been doing so well latley, iv been struggeling with my eating big time and am essentially back to square one after all the recent progress i had made regarding my relationship with food and portion sizes.
As dissapointed as i am with myselef it is time to do somthing..i am now 9stone 13 again, target plus 4.5 being so close to 10st is concerning.

on August 5th i will have been at my original target for 1year. having thought thought long and hard about what iwas going to do i havcreated myself a list of goals.

1. to be as close tomy target weight as possible at next weeks weigh in.

2. to be three lbs under target by the first week of september, for my weekend in falmouth with joe.

3. to have gotten nmy eating habits under control by christmas, so i dont spend the entire time binging and unwell like last year!


now, because things are so dire fod wise have began the two week kick start special k diet, hopefully not nly will it boost my loss and get me back to target- or so atleast ihope so... but upon returning to the sw plan iwill not only appreciate it more but have gaub ged some portion controll and know how much food my body really needs.

i will be eating a combo of suggested evening meals, and ?syn free? meals iwould do on sw but with limited portions.

i chose special k diet, because it has worked for me in the past. fingers crossed, il be very upset if it doesnt.

xxxxxxxx

 

[Littleslimmingbee]

sorry about the typings ladies can only access the net via the stupid ps3 atm, its a nightmare!

 

[*EB*]

Fern, sending you loads of love honey - sounds like u are going through a right mess at the mo - good luck with special k plan, give me a pm if you need anything xxx

 

[Littleslimmingbee]

Thanks hon

i feel quite messy in my head, but everything else is going fine.. works got alot better and im even starting my own art classes in september which im doing lots of training for and very much looking fowards to doin, but the last three weeks has just been awful food wise. I have no will power, self confidence or motivation and can easily be swayed.. but it feels like the worse its getting, its just spiraling and so theres a part of me thats desperate to rein it in, and another part that just doesnt want to care anymore.

Day 1 on special k today and it sucks ass. I cant decide whether this constant sick stomach ache i have is because i have overeaten so much the last few days its recovering, or because the diet is 'hurting' me.. but its only been one day and i cant throw in the towel yet. I know even just a week will make a difference, i hope. Theres a part of me that thinks itl all be a wasted effort. I am concerned, but wont know untill iv given it a honest shot. As i said before when i was 13 (dont judge me lol) i gave it a go for 3 weeks because my mum put me on itl and i lost 10lbs.. and i know i wasnt being 100%.. constantly sneaking treats when i could.


I hope by giving it an honest shot it'l give me a decent loss and then i can begin appreciating slimmingworld a bit better.

im so angry with myself for geting myself in a mess with it all im determined to stick it out even if i hate every minute, but i'm also finding it hard to stop feeling sorry for myself and giving in. Deep down i know this is my first real test, i know if i dont do it now i will loose it forever and i cant do that. I have to be strong.


Todays eating


breakfast: 40g special k, 125 mls semi skimmed milk


snack: 5 cubes of melon.


lunch: 40 special k sustain, 125 ml semi skimmed milk


snack: 1 apple.


tea: 1 small jacket pot, little bit of flora light, small individual can of baked beans, salad leaves and 4 cherry tomatoes.




diet lemonade and water.
:cry:
1 day down 5 days to go till WI

 

[Louise24]

Hiya Fern, that sounds tough but I'm sure you'll get brilliant results from it, then it will be all worth while. Good luck xxx

 

[Littleslimmingbee]

My god i flipping hope so. If i dont lose atleast 3lbs this week i will be rather pissed to say the least. LOL dont ask for much hey!?

 

[Littleslimmingbee]

Day Two. I hate special K and i feel like i need to hurt someone.

Breakfast: Special k (suprise suprise) and 125 mls semi skimmed milk.

Mid morn: handful of rasberries.


lunch: special k and 125 mls milk, 1banana


tea: tuna steak, new potatoes & corn on the cob.


Diet coke, water.. water and more water..

two down, a million more to go..

 

[*EB*]

keep going Ferny - you can do it!!! xxxx

 

[xGeordieGirlx]

Well done Fern, keep going

I was considering merging the Special K diet with green and red days for 2 weeks. Going to keep an eye on your progress and see how it goes for you before I make a decision!! x

 

[Littleslimmingbee]

update: day two:

breakfast: 45g special k, 125 semi skimmed milk

snack: handful of rasberries

lunch: 45g special k, 125 semi skimmed milk and a banana (should have been snack but was 3.30 by the time i got to eat again and i could have eaten a horse)

snack: 3 cherry tomatoes, about 10g of dry roasted peanuts and an apple
^ totally unplanned and naughty

tea: Tuna steak seasoned with black pepper and fresh lemon juice, new pots and 2 mini corn on the cob, salad leaves.



I feel like i have eaten too much. Despite being starving lol..

Intend to go for a run tomorrow to 'make up for it'


cant believe its only day two.

 

[NikkiP]

Aww Fern it sounds really difficult! But I am sure you will lose lots on it. I signed up to the Special K diet online but when it came to the crux I just don't think I could do it!! xx

 

[Littleslimmingbee]

Its tough, the cereal just is not filling at all./ I had intended to go for a run today but i just couldnt muster up the enthusiasm, however i will be going to zumba monday so thats somthing.

anyone wanna guess what i started my day with? lol

il update food diary later. i hope i do loose somthing but i dont think im going too.. but wont know unless i give it a shot. Fingers x'd

xx

 

[Kenco]

fern i stopped by and had a look at your pics hun,you look amazing well done.what an achievement.good luck.x

 

[Littleslimmingbee]

Aww thanks for visiting and the kind comments, much appreciated.


Breakfast: 45g special k 125 ml semi skimmed milk

mdimorn- fruit variety pot shop bought

dinner; 45 special k sustain and 125 ml semi skimmed milk

snack: 1 apple.

had a two bites of oh's cornish pasty-damn him!

tea: potato and spinach curry with 40g of rice and vlf natural yogurt.

i did have two poppadoms with a teeny bit of mango chuctney..


did some walking around bath today, so hopefully thats somthing, but i really ought to get stricter if i want a result, cant be eating pasty and poppadoms.



on to tomorrow- cant wait for Wi on wednesday, boy am i gunna eat some foooood!

 

[Littleslimmingbee]

i think iv ruined it.. eurgh.


i ate 5 heros today i just cant stop picking little bits every day.

breakfast: special k sustain, 125mls milk and handful of rasberries


dinner: special k, 125mls milk and an apple


5 chocs

tea: slow cooked chicken new pots, carrots and peas. drizzle of gravey

 

[Littleslimmingbee]

Breakfast: 45g special k sustain, 125mls milk

1 apple

dinner: 45g of special k and 125mls milk

4 slices of pinapple

tea: chicken and bacon salad

mullerlight- not really aloud but im starving

zumba!

iv had a sneaky look on the scales and looks like iv lost zilch. Im hardly suprised as iv had bits and bobs i shouldnt have done, but equally as dissapointed in myself as i am in it not even shifting a lb. However- WI is not untill wednesday so will keep going untill then. On the other hand, i would not suggest anyone to do this, iv horrible pain in my tummy constantly, bad headaches ands have zero energy, i cannot continue for another week as suggested and have no desire to either, not even if i'd lost 6lbs !



will update tomorrow xxx