Kez's struggles and troubles! 17th June Restart!

[cornishkez]

Morning all...yuk does my mouth taste rank! We had tapas last night and I think we picked anything which contained garlic or chilli! Have brushed my teeth twice, but everytims a down a some water it comes back. Gross!

Well.......I 'think' I am going to give CD another go. I'm not saying I am for def, because as soon as I say I am going to do something, I do the complete opposite. So I am just going to see how things go.

A pint down and have asked OH's folks not to cook any roast for me this afternoon. Just need to get off the sofa and get my horses moved! Need to walk them to a friends land for a couple of months while ours is reseeded. But the weather is beastly outside and I can't be bothered. But know that if I do stick to CD then tomorrow I will be feeling pretty crappy and will want to do it even less.

Hope everyone has a lovely day!

 

[cornishkez]

Well, I moved the horses. Quite enjoyed the walk actually. Had a couple of killer hills to go up and the top of my thighs felt the burn and my thighs are aching now. Which is all good!

Had a vanilla shake at about 2pm, just had some porridge and got a mousse hardening up in the fridge. Have had 1 coffee, which I had with milk and sugar...naughty me! Haven't drunk nearly enough water, which would be the answer for my head ache... feeling very withdrawn, subdued and a bit shaky. Keeping myself to myself, watching Britains got Talent repeat and biding my time until I can go to bed.

 

[Surfhunny]

Hang on in there hun, you know it gets better. I'm dredging up old films to watch to keep occuppied, theres not much else to do. I thought people would be going out tonight with it being Bank holiday tomorrow, but seems everyone has had the same idea as me, curled up on the sofa in pj's with a dvd. Only thing missing is an OH to cuddle up to, but never mind. AP only used to hog the remote anyway....

You got any plans for tomorrow? I'm going to drag myself out of bed and go to B&Q early, try and miss the Bank Holiday rush. Hopefully the weather will be better than today!! I don't know why I've turned into an obsessive about my garden all of a sudden lol.

Hope you're feeling better soon! xx

 

[cornishkez]

If the weather is good then I want to do some more work in the garden, need to do a trip to the dump, need to blitz the whole of my house. Shame I didn't start CD on Friday, cause then tomorrow would be Day 4 and I would be buzzing and would get it all done. But don't suspect I will be doing much tomorrow at all

Head ache is getting worse by the minute. Just got my choc mousse out of the fridge an I've mucked it up somehow so it's in the bin and I had a slice of chicken instead. Only a very small slice, and it's better than the digestive caramels in the cupboard.

Trying to neck the water to wash the headache away, but only 1.5 litres and a coffee down. Best keep glugging!

Add me on facebook if you want, I like nosing through people's photos! lol. Have given up on farmville, got fed up with the endless greenhouses, easter eggs etc etc. Plus I spent far too many hours on it!

Oh, for facebook search for: [email protected]

 

[Surfhunny]

I've added you hun thanks, there's def plenty of photo's on there for you to nose through lol, 51 albums to be exact. That should keep you busy for a while :giggle:. I love looking at other peoples photo's too, I've just spent 15mins nosing through my friends Mum's photo's from a wedding of people I don't even know lol.

Boo about the mousse, I hate it when it goes wrong. I've had all of my shakes for the day and i'm still hungry, might make a cup of the veg bouillion if I'm still hungry in half an hour.

 

[great things]

hiya

i'm back from my hols. had some fab wine etc.... back on track tomorrow. thinking might do a ss day then go to the 810 for a couple of days then 1000. just don't want to retain water for a week. thing is i'm out on friday then at the dentists on tuesday for a root canal which i'm getting sedated for so need to be eating for at least a couple of days beforehand.

argh! typical. stressed now.

p.s was naughty and taken your pass thing so i can add you on fb too.

nikki

 

[cornishkez]

No worries, I crashed early last night. My headache got so bad I ended up chucking up. Took some paracetomol that was awful! I am so pleased I don't suffer with migraines.

Soo....onto Day 2. Feeling very smug with myself for managing Day 1. I feel tired and dopey, so think I best take it easy today and keep myself to myself.

Gotta phone my CDC today to ask if I can pop in to her's later. Only got enough shakes to last me till Wednesday and she only does appointments Monday and Thursday.

Jumped on the scales this morning and I am down to a weight I haven't seen since I came off CD, so that makes last night worth it!

My OH has been ratty for weeks now, and finally opened up last night and confessed he is struggling with not drinking. Each weekend that comes around he is finding it harder not to go out and get plastered. Not sure how I feel about that, I know that I cannot look at him while he is drunk or has been drinking. He turns into another person, don't get me wrong, he never gets nasty or violent. I can't explain it, he just turns into someone I don't like. I spent 4 years trying to help him turn his problems around and he's been dry for 2 years. I don't want to go back down that road, but don't know how to help him get through it?!

Hoo hum...anyway, it's nice and sunny here. Now going to accept your facebook requess and have a nose at your photos! lol

 

[lyndzi76]

Glad your feeling better today, Thanks for adding me on FB.
Sorry Hubby feeling down, it's horrid seeing someone down and not being able to do a thing to help them. Hope things pick up x x

 

[suepat10]

Hi Kez

Hope you are well.

I see you're 'back in the fold' - I'm back on tomorrow after 3 weeks.

Have a good week xxx

 

[cornishkez]

And you, I sent you a message on FB. x

 

[lyndzi76]

And you, I sent you a message on FB. x

I didn't get your message sorry?
How many horses do you have?

 

[cornishkez]

Ooops, sorry that was meant for Sue. Should have specified!

I've only got the 1 now, the coloured youngster. I field share with a friend who has 1 and also my mum's pony on loan for her neice. So three's company as they say!

 

[cornishkez]

Hmmm...no more headaches today. But the sore throat is kicking in. I was bad earlier and had some steak, potato wedges and baked beans.

It's because I weighed myself and I liked what I saw, so I kid myself that it's ok. That one meal won't put it all back on. But one meal WILL stop me from reaching ketosis. Did a stick earlier in the vague hope that I was, but didn't need to waste one.

So tomorrow, is day 1 all over again! Why do I do it? It's stupid cause I was feeling slimmer today. I know I had dropped a load of water bloat, and now it'll all be back again in the morning!

Never mind, hopefully some day I'll learn!

 

[Surfhunny]

I do the same thing, I had to hide the scales for a while to stop myself from doing exactly that. It's usually day 4 that I do it, so tomorrow is the danger zone for me, I'm not going anywhere near the s ales until WI on Wednesday because I'm feeling a bit fragile at the moment and I KNOW it'll trip me up if I go on them!

Never mind though it might mean it takes longer to get into ketosis but at least it was a proper mean and you didn't pig out on junk like I wouldve. Xx

 

[cornishkez]

Well weighed last night I'd put on nearly 4lbs, so went to bed feeling thoroughly ashamed of myself. Gave myself a talking to and this morning weighed again and 3 of those lbs are back off. I know it's first thing and I haven't drunk etc etc. But it was a relief. I am staying away from the scales now until my SW weigh in Wednesday evening.

 

[Eternalflame]

Hi Kez

How is everything going? Have you given in SW and swapped back to CD? I had a bad weekend, good , but naughty .. but was worth it. So debating whether to have a cpl of days CD, then back to SW.. decisions decisions.. thing is, if I go back to CD, then onto SW, then I'll gain a few lb in the 1st week. Very undecisive today, lol..x

 

[cornishkez]

Hi Nikki, not given up on SW. But annoyed with myself for all the cheating and the poor 1lb loss last week. Had a load of sachets left over from CD, so figured I'd try to use them up and give myself a boost.

I have only got 2 days worth of sachets left and my CDC wouldn't be able to see me until Thursday so very, very undecisive about what to do.

I did well on Sunday and for most of yesterday, but flaked in the evening. So today I would like to be back on, but haven't brought any shakes or anything to work?! So am starving at the moment, but have nothing to eat (or drink). Don't know whether to do SW, but just starve myself for a few days.

If I had succeeded in completing day 2 and then day 3 of CD then I would have gone to see the CDC and maybe gone back on for another week. But now I just don't know! lol

 

[cornishkez]

Well, I've just been into town and didn't buy anything naughty! Yay me! I usually can't resist a pasty or panini. Bought a tin of tuna for this afternoon, as have no shakes with me.

Am feeling very thick headed and a bit dizzy at the mo. Got a swollen gland on one side of my thorat and it's all mucky. Haven't eaten anything yet today, just water and a couple of coffees. Is it bad that at the minute I am getting a buzz off that starving/belly ache feeling? I'm fighting it for as long as I can. But suspect in an hour I'll be having some tuna on my break.

Kicking myself for eating yesterday, if I'd just been that little bit stronger then today I would be in ketosis. Still, I am trying to keep going until tomorrow weigh in, so I can get a good loss.

Last weeks SW wi was 17st 10lbs. I need 2lbs lose to get my first half stone award at SW. I like getting certificates and stickers! My class aren't very good with their losses, so I reckon if I had anything over 3-3.5lbs I'd be guaranteed slimmer of the week. But would feel like such a fraud if it was because of CD.

I passed my CDC's husband in the bank, that spurred me not to get a pasty! If I could have random people dotted about all over the place keeping me on my toes, that would be ideal!

Someone has brought in cola cubes and rosy apples....how rude!

Really struggling now, got the shakes and gibbering a bit. Trying to keep my mouth shut, cause I'm sure my colleagues think I'm on something

 

[Surfhunny]

Aw bless ya hun hope you're feeling a bit better, it must be day for it because I've been feeling shakey. The nurses at work forced me to have my blood pressure done then tried to force feed me lucozade. I pretended I was fine so I didn't have to drink it, but I'm still a bit woozy. Ah well the joys of low blood pressure and low blood sugar all in one go.

We're a right pair aren't we? And no it's not bad to secretly like the starving feeling, it makes me feel kinda smug, but I'd never ever admit to my friends that I'm hungry lol! And I saw Tactless Tessie eying up my chocolate tetra at lunch but I didn't give her the chance to pass comment, I pretended she wasn't even there!

 

[cornishkez]

I've got someone at work who is turning into a bit of one of them. They knew I'd done CD a few weeks back, but wouldn't tell them I'm trying again. They would just stick their nose in and come up with some judgemental and unhelpful reply! When I went back onto SW, they said 'I knew you wouldn't stick to it'. COW!!!

I am now going down for my break and going to have some tuna, they achy belly has passed and I don't actually feel hungry, but I do feel like I might pass out. Have suddenly gone very hot and my face has gone bright red...lol!

Hope your day is going well? Can't wait for weigh in tomorrow night!