Minerva's corner...

[nattyclare78]

I think perhaps it has to do with your relationship with food or any underlying food sensitivities and why you are in the situation of needing to lose weight!

For example, I am particularly sensitive to carbs and I am actually only on a vlcd as the dr advised it was the only way I could lose weight.
I don't particularly emotionally eat and don't eat rubbish but an average diet like sw doesn't work for me. Being freely allowed to eat pasta or potatoes for example would just result in me gaining weight! Saying that I can quite happily chow down on a family size pizza and tub of ben and jerrys!!!

Friends that I know that are on it live off of processed ready meals so I suppose having to prepare food and be aware of syns made them think twice about what they are putting in!

 

[Minerva]

I'm quite sensitive to carbs as well, but calorie counting does work for me - even if carbs are still somewhat included in the diet. It's strange that the doctor actually advised a VLCD, but I'm glad it's working for you

--

I lost 2lbs this week, putting me in the 11's! Yay. I did cheat a little and move my WI day back to Wednesday as I always seem to go up in weight a little after the weekend It doesn't really matter at the end of the day, but I just want the official WI to be a bit more favourable Hihi

Also only 7lbs away from officially losing 100 lbs since my all-time (recorded) highest weight Yay. I can do this!

 

[nattyclare78]

Well done on the 2lbs, that's fab!

And what an achievement 100lbs will be, do you have before and after pics? x

 

[Minerva]

Haha, yes, I do actually have a few before and afters from my original weight loss...

This was from January 2008 - November 2009.

View media item 4748
First is 18st 7, middle is at 10st or so (more of what I'm aiming for now) when I quit LL officially, and the last is at just below 8st. I don't want to go below 9st this time as I didn't like it at all.

 

[nattyclare78]

All I can say is WOW!!!
Amazing. Thankyou for sharing x

 

[Minerva]

I know I can lose the weight again ... one day!

But today hasn't been good in that regard! So confession time. I think the stress of the final few weeks of Uni are getting to me and on top of strict dieting my brain just said NOPE, NOT TODAY!... So I wolfed down 6 (yes .. 6) small bags of Wotsits (was my craving for a while now...) and two bagel thins with some garlic sausage. This was over the course of the day and it totalled to 1200 calories plus the milk in my coffee. Now I just question why, but, I guess I'll just draw a line under it and move on. I feel a bit guilty, so I won't be having anymore food today - 1200 isn't breaking the bank... yet. It's my upper daily limit, so over the course of the next week hopefully I'll even it out with lower days.

I need to focus and just do my uni work. I think that's what's getting to me most. Knowing it's too hard and knowing I'll fail certain aspects of it. It's not the end of the world, there's re-takes in August (I know I'll be doing it for the Maths...)... Oh well. My life doesn't depend on passing these exams, just got to keep my stress levels low and pace myself, or I'll end up in the same boat as I did with one other degree where I quit at exam stage with severe panic attacks and inability to even function.

 

[Loz1986]

Not long now til it's all over, Minerva (uni/exams).

And wow at those photos!

 

[mark45]

Minerva. I have a confession to make. Yesterday I had a pizza, one of my favourite ones @ 1,768 kcal.

What are Wotsits? 99kcal a bag? Don't worry about it too much. I actually think sometimes when that one thing is on your mind constantly there
is nothing you can do but eat it (hence the pizza) to relieve you of that. As you said you will average it out over the course of the week. This is good. In fact that's what I generally do.

"Knowing it's hard" translate that to "think it's hard" - if you have not done it (you said 'I need to ... just do my uni work') you don't know it's hard. You have this 'expectation' it's going to be hard and are put off by it. My advice is to just do it. I have learnt this ('just doing it') recently.

You also said 'knowing I'll fail certain aspects of it.' translate this to "I know which specific areas in which to revise to increase my knowledge on this subject". Say it 10 times. And then do it. It will get easier.

"I'll end up in the same boat as I did with one other degree where I quit at exam stage with severe panic attacks and inability to even function."
I am sorry you felt like this, really. I have gone through similar things as I have endured university - an experience I wish to forget. But you know what? Screw the boat. You are on a luxury yacht sailing where you want to go.

Dwelling on the past past has never helped me. I can say that - I got a B.A. degree in History, ironically.

In fact the only useful thing you can take on your luxury yacht regarding the past is the mere fact that happened in the past. Simply the past is the past, now you are sailing forward!

 

[nattyclare78]

You will lose the weight again, you are losing the weight again!
But it needs to be sustainable and you are human. You are doing so so well x

 

[Kira]

Hello Minerva thought I'd drop by over here and see how you are doing. Good it seems. Your pics are amazing and you will do it again. Have to say 8st you must have been tiny (don't know how tall you are?).

I'm going to have to work my way around here to figure how it works I was next release the best as navigating on the forum. I've managed finally to get to 8 days on vlcd (happens to be SNS but may switch to Exante at a later date).

Have a great day and hope to catch again soon.

 

[tickettyboo]

Morning Minerva! I'm home, recovering and finally feel like catching up with a few bits and pieces. I've sort of scanned your posts that I've missed, but will have a proper read later, I'd like to read the psychology article as it looks interesting. But just had to comment on your photos, wow you look amazing! Happy birthday belatedly, as you can imagine I was somewhat preoccupied last Friday . Hope you have a nice weekend, I guess you're up to your eyes in studying at the moment. Speak soon x

 

[nattyclare78]

Hi Minerva, just wanted to say hope you are ok. Have a great weekend

 

[Minerva]

Minerva. I have a confession to make. Yesterday I had a pizza, one of my favourite ones @ 1,768 kcal.

What are Wotsits? 99kcal a bag? Don't worry about it too much. I actually think sometimes when that one thing is on your mind constantly there
is nothing you can do but eat it (hence the pizza) to relieve you of that. As you said you will average it out over the course of the week. This is good. In fact that's what I generally do.

"Knowing it's hard" translate that to "think it's hard" - if you have not done it (you said 'I need to ... just do my uni work') you don't know it's hard. You have this 'expectation' it's going to be hard and are put off by it. My advice is to just do it. I have learnt this ('just doing it') recently.

You also said 'knowing I'll fail certain aspects of it.' translate this to "I know which specific areas in which to revise to increase my knowledge on this subject". Say it 10 times. And then do it. It will get easier.

"I'll end up in the same boat as I did with one other degree where I quit at exam stage with severe panic attacks and inability to even function."
I am sorry you felt like this, really. I have gone through similar things as I have endured university - an experience I wish to forget. But you know what? Screw the boat. You are on a luxury yacht sailing where you want to go.

Dwelling on the past past has never helped me. I can say that - I got a B.A. degree in History, ironically.

In fact the only useful thing you can take on your luxury yacht regarding the past is the mere fact that happened in the past. Simply the past is the past, now you are sailing forward!

Thank you so much on your thoughtful response. You are very good at giving advice, it really helped! You are so right. I just need to get on with it, and if it's hard and I feel like I'll fail, then I just need to concentrate on that aspect more. It's weird that I somehow couldn't think through far enough to realise this, but sometimes someone giving an objective view from the outside really puts things into perspective. I got so wrapped up on the failure aspect that I almost gave up trying. You've given me some motivation to keep fighting!

Hello Minerva thought I'd drop by over here and see how you are doing. Good it seems. Your pics are amazing and you will do it again. Have to say 8st you must have been tiny (don't know how tall you are?).

I'm going to have to work my way around here to figure how it works I was next release the best as navigating on the forum. I've managed finally to get to 8 days on vlcd (happens to be SNS but may switch to Exante at a later date).

Have a great day and hope to catch again soon.

Hi Kira! I saw you on the other forum and I did read that you're doing well! Well done on surviving the first week of the VLCD path, you're over the hump! Those first 7 days drag on as if time stands still, but then... life takes over again and it becomes a secondary process. Exante seems more affordable from what I've seen and the flavours seem more exciting? So when you get tired of SnS it might make a nice change. You do seem a lot more happy about things and have worked through the things that were stopping you before, I am sure you'll get there this time. It's not a race, but a lifestyle change and little steps add up at the end. x

I'm 5'4, so at 8st I was ... I don't know. Most people would say that was fine, but on the thin side. I got down to 7st 7... and I hated it so much. Having been bigger all my life I was not used to feeling bones everywhere with no padding, I was always painfully cold and everything just felt hard and tiring. I think my ideal weight is around 9st 3, BMI 22, I felt healthy and slim without it hindering me. I'm about 2 and a half stone away, so I think I can do it by the end of the year!

Morning Minerva! I'm home, recovering and finally feel like catching up with a few bits and pieces. I've sort of scanned your posts that I've missed, but will have a proper read later, I'd like to read the psychology article as it looks interesting. But just had to comment on your photos, wow you look amazing! Happy birthday belatedly, as you can imagine I was somewhat preoccupied last Friday . Hope you have a nice weekend, I guess you're up to your eyes in studying at the moment. Speak soon x

Thank you for the birthday wishes I'm glad you're back home, take it day by day and I really hope with each day you'll find that things get easier. x

 

[Minerva]

So, Day 52 of the diet today! I did actually end up having dinner on my over-indulgence day and it added up to 1800. But, I made up for it yesterday with a 'down day' of 350 calories. So it will even out All good. Now my craving is gone, I feel completely motivated to continue as before! Blips happen, especially with an ex-binge disorder sufferer like me, but what matters is how we manage those days. While having a super low calorie day may not be exactly the best solution, I'm at least glad I didn't let it spiral out of control and let myself give up. I did see the 11's dip into single digits this morning (11st 9.4!) so I don't think I did too much damage with the off day. But with TOTM just around the corner, I expect some water retention which will be annoying to say the least.

Coursework is slowly going in the right direction, now I have to figure out a way to connect an SQL database to Java, and it's doing my head in. Oh well, I'll figure it out... I hope.

 

[Minerva]

Yesterday was a good day Had 550 calories at the most to still even out the mishap the other day. It should be fine now.

Today I feel a bit more faint and my TOTM has come, so I will be kind to myself and eat a little more. Still did my fast - 18 hours - and just had lunch. Then dinner at about 7pm. The OH is out tonight playing Dungeons and Dragons, I can't go, but and that's ok. Means a nice quiet evening by myself.

 

[Kira]

Wow 52 days that's great. 2 and half stone is very do able by the end of the year and you may even there sooner. As you said it's not a race. You are focused and i think that makes all the difference. I think the mental challenge of trying to lose weight is the most difficult but for long term lifestyle changes the mind has to be fixed if you like - well certainly mine. Have another good day.

 

[mark45]

Thank you so much on your thoughtful response. You are very good at giving advice, it really helped! You are so right. I just need to get on with it, and if it's hard and I feel like I'll fail, then I just need to concentrate on that aspect more. It's weird that I somehow couldn't think through far enough to realise this, but sometimes someone giving an objective view from the outside really puts things into perspective. I got so wrapped up on the failure aspect that I almost gave up trying. You've given me some motivation to keep fighting!

Thank you for your reply Minerva. I really appreciate it.

If I am honest with you, I was thinking of deleting the whole thing (I know, I suffer from negative thinking). But since I am undergoing a period of transformation I am adopting a "just do it" attitude I just posted it, and pleased that I did.

I got an interview on Monday - wish me luck.

...But, I made up for it yesterday with a 'down day' of 350 calories. So it will even out All good. Now my craving is gone, I feel completely motivated to continue as before! Blips happen, especially with an ex-binge disorder sufferer like me, but what matters is how we manage those days. While having a super low calorie day may not be exactly the best solution, I'm at least glad I didn't let it spiral out of control and let myself give up.

Coursework is slowly going in the right direction, now I have to figure out a way to connect an SQL database to Java, and it's doing my head in. Oh well, I'll figure it out... I hope.

Very good. I'm pleased for you

 

[nattyclare78]

Hope you are having a good weekend apart from totm and are being kind to yourself x

 

[Minerva]

Wow 52 days that's great. 2 and half stone is very do able by the end of the year and you may even there sooner. As you said it's not a race. You are focused and i think that makes all the difference. I think the mental challenge of trying to lose weight is the most difficult but for long term lifestyle changes the mind has to be fixed if you like - well certainly mine. Have another good day.

It did take me a while to get the focus going, I knew I had to start in January, but I was not ready. February came.. the same... March... same.. but I was getting more and more frustrated and just started. I wasn't tasting anything anymore and just had the feeling "I've had enough". I wish I'd had this motivation in January, I'd have been so much further along! But, can't really undo it and can't force myself to do something I wasn't ready for. It's always a mental struggle, so I'm going to ride this motivation wave for as long as I can How are you getting on?

Thank you for your reply Minerva. I really appreciate it.

If I am honest with you, I was thinking of deleting the whole thing (I know, I suffer from negative thinking). But since I am undergoing a period of transformation I am adopting a "just do it" attitude I just posted it, and pleased that I did.

Thank you, I am so glad you decided to post it. I, too, suffer from a lot of negative thinking and anxiety over every response I give, either here or in person... then I overthink it later... I wish I was like normal people in that regard, being able to speak freely. Maybe one day I'll master it... for now, like you, I have to adopt a "just do it" attitude and try not to let things get to me. But it certainly is difficult.
In any case, you made a difference to me and to yourself, you were not afraid to speak out and as a consequence it was a positive experience all around. Small steps to more confidence and away from negative thinking spirals

Hope you are having a good weekend apart from totm and are being kind to yourself x

Thank you x

 

[Minerva]

Today has gone well, had my coffee over the course of the day and plenty of flavoured water, no food yet Now I'm just waiting to start dinner, it will be tasty! I'm making Jamie Oliver's Chilli Con Carne meatballs - so will finish the day on about 800-900 calories which is totally fine! A big treat meal for a Sunday

BUT, I am worried about my cat. We only got these two in December, they turned 1 this May! Two beautiful ginger boys. One of them however is a heavy set cat with quite a lot of water retention in his belly... which I have taken him to the vet for now and they're running some tests... But, the more I read about the causes of this, the more scared I get. None of it is good. They had the flu virus when they were kittens so both are partially or almost blind. He's very young and should not be this 'fat'... I really hope it's nothing serious. I can't bear to lose another pet so soon after my old one passed away. Losing him broke my heart.