My Food Diary on the Countdown to 50

[232kat]

Thursday 4/12/14 EE Day

B: 2 poached eggs, 5 finns (B.), 2 laughing cow extra lights (1/2 A)

L: jacket potato with tuna mayonnaise (5)

D: cauliflower soup with goat's cheese (3), gammon

S: 100ml semi skimmed milk (1/2 A), fresh fruit salad, banana, free yogurt, chewing gum (1.5), chews (4.5)

Total syns 14

 

[232kat]

Friday 5/12/14 Red Day

B: banana and free yogurt

L: spicy cauliflower soup, with bacon

D: Slimming World Xmas night out, no idea on syn value and will not be counting

S: 250ml semi skimmed milk (A), fresh fruit salad

Things went downhill in the afternoon with goat's cheese, a large cream cake then a syn full three course Xmas meal with slimming world group

 

[232kat]

Saturday 6/12/14 EE Day

B: bacon, sausages (3), eggs, tomatoes, mushroom and onions

L: spicy cauliflower soup and free yogurt

D: steak, potato wedges, salad and goat's cheese (3)

S: 250ml semi skimmed milk (A), Hifi bar (B.), chocolate (13), fresh fruit salad and free yogurt

Total syns 20

 

[232kat]

Sunday 7/12/14 EE Day

14 weeks to holiday

PIZZA

 

[232kat]

Wednesday 10/12/14 Red Day

I gained 6.5 lbs last night taking me to 17st 10.5 lbs. My heaviest was 18st and that was over 7 years ago. Since then I have been about 15st 7lbs on average. I have gained 12.5 lbs since joining slimming world on 2 September 2014 with a start weight of 16st 12 lbs. It's not the diet as I know that works well when someone who joined the same time as me has achieved their 2st award and many other people in the group have reached their goal weight, some of them losing more than 5st.

I feel like my body and mind are letting me down. My mind because I am constantly craving junk food and my body because this weight prohibits me from running and doing the physical activities that I love. My self esteem is at rock bottom and I can't even look at myself in the mirror. I've given up keeping my hair and nails nice and I have no really nice clothes to wear as they are all too small. I am buying the minimum of cheap clothes just to get me by till I start to fit into my old ones. I know all this is adding to my low self esteem but I really can't afford to buy a new wardrobe. However, I do need to stop feeling sorry for myself and I need a good kick up the arse. My husband has bought me an annual membership to the local gym that has a pool and I really need to take advantage of it.

My plan going forward is to try the new S&P plan for the next two weeks with a few interruptions; I have my Xmas work lunch tomorrow and I am visiting relatives on Saturday - I will try my utmost to have wise choices. We talked about the S&P plan in class last night and it seems easy enough to follow even without the new books. I am also going to do my hair tonight, shave my legs and tidy my nails up.

Going positively forward today's menu is:

B: 35g porridge (B.)

L: cauliflower cheese soup (3), tuna mayonnaise (4) and salad

D: roast chicken with speedy roasted vegetables and 2 tbsps fresh parmesan (1.5)

S: 250ml semi skimmed milk (A), chewing gum (1), mixed speedy fruit, hifi bar (B.), tub quark and 100g blitzed cherries (2.5)

Total syns 12

I manage to do S&P all day and then last thing tonight I made quark ice cream with cherries, so not a 100% day in terms of S&P, but 100% Red. I've gone to bed early to keep me on the straight and narrow

 

[232kat]

Thursday 11/12/14 Red Day

Oh no it's the work Xmas lunch! We are off to a local Turkish restaurant and I can't remember what I pre-ordered; however, what I do remember is that the last time I went there with a friend the food was oily. I think somewhere in the recesses of my mind I ordered a mixed grill, but then changed my mind and opted for a traditional turkey dinner. I certainly can't remember what starter and dessert I've ordered, I know none of them are slimming world friendly, so I might skip those. I'm sure someone will volunteer to eat them in my place. After the disaster on the scales this week I so want to stick to the plan and try to lose the 6.5 lbs I gained, and one Xmas lunch is not going to stand in my way.

I didn't get to colour my hair last night as planned, but I have bought a cherry red colour and I'm colouring it now at 6.30 in the morning. It's was dark brown with flecks of gray. I'm also going to wax my legs at the weekend, so I'm not beetroot red to match the new hair colour every time I have to bare them at the swimming pool's health suite. I really need to start taking better care of myself, I may be fat but that's really not an excuse to be slovenly.

Menu for today:

B: fresh fruit salad and free yogurt

L: prawn cocktail, roast turkey, vegetables, gravy, small Yorkshire pudding and small piece of bread (15) - my dessert was rock hard so I didn't eat it, which saved a few syns.

D: cauliflower cheese soup, primula light (A), 5 finn crisp originals (B.)

S: 250ml semi skimmed milk (A), chewing gum (1.5), 100g pureed cherries (2.5), 100g pureed raspberries (1), tub quark

Total syns 20

 

[232kat]

I now feel mean. I was getting on the bus this morning and a mother and her son were on two seats and she was trying to get her other younger son to sit on the seat opposite. However, he didn't want to so I sat on it. She clearly didn't like this and said 'excuse me that's my son's seat'. To which I responded 'no it's not he didn't want to sit there and why can't he sit on your lap', he was small enough. She clearly wasn't happy and put the two brothers together and sat behind.

I know I'm going to sound totally old, but when we were kids we had to sit on our parents laps if the bus was busy. I get so fed up with young people, who travel freely and take up all the seats never giving them up for an overweight middle aged lump like me. However, the reason I feel mean is this lady gave up her seat for an elderly lady so she had a kind heart and my annoyance at selfish teens was the reason I had held my ground, which really meant I was making a stand against the wrong person. This feeling would normally drive me to the biscuit tin, but I've posted my mean behaviour on here instead so I can move on and stick to my plan.

Friday 12/12/14 Red Day

B: 35g porridge oats (B.)

L: cauliflower cheese soup (1/2 A),

D: chicken in wholemeal breadcrumbs and parmesan (B.) (1),
tuna mayonnaise with salad (4)

S: 125ml semi skimmed milk (1/2 A), speedy fruit salad, chewing gum (1), 2 free yogurts, 2 slices of ham, 3 maoam chews (7)

Total syns 13

 

[232kat]

Saturday 13/12/14

The day started out with the best of intentions. I had a banana then bacon medallions, egg, beans, mushrooms and tomatoes for breakfast, believing that if I filled myself up with free foods I would be fairly good in the day. However, once I got in my car and started my two hour journey I found half a bag of imperial mints and the remains of a bag of liquorice sweets, which had mysteriously vanished by the time I reached my destination.

Taking on board the need to plan, I had taken with me a flask of cheesy cauliflower soup and two apples, but I arrived back home last night with them uneaten. However, during the day I had eaten a bag of marshmallows and then a lovely evening meal of homemade lasagne, buttered potatoes, creamy salad and garlic bread. I finally arrived back home late last night and finished the day with plenty of cheese and biscuits followed by a finger of fudge and a double decker.

I've no idea how many syns my day amounts to, probably in excess of a hundred. Nether the less, it's a start that I owned up and admitted what I have eaten on here, so that's some kind of progress. As they says tomorrow, or rather today, is another day!

 

[232kat]

Sunday 14/12/14

13 weeks to holiday

Well the day started off we me going shopping after only eating a banana. By the time I got home I was starving so I made a bacon, mushroom and onion omelet, then I ate a pomegranate and cherries. It only takes one finger of fudge, which then leads to my downfall.

From that sweet onwards I didn't stop. I ate my husband's sweets and then went over the local shops and bought more. I finally finished the evening with a tuna mayonnaise sub roll. I would not be able to guess the syns I ate today . The lesson learned is not to allow myself to get hungry as common sense flies out the window.

 

[232kat]

Monday 15/12/14 Red Day

Today's menu:

B: 2 Aldi benefit bars (B.) and speedy fruits

L: cauliflower cheese soup (3)

D: roast chicken with speedy vegetables, gravy and mint sauce (3.5) followed by quark and speedy fruits ice cream (3)

S: 250ml semi skimmed milk (A), chewing gum (1.5), hifi bar (B.)

Total syns 11

 

[232kat]

Tuesday 16/12/14

Another disaster day. When am I going to put any effort into his plan. I just get this overwhelming urge to eat sugary foods and I just can't seem to get enough of them.

Seriously, it was easier to stop smoking 40 cigarettes a day than it is for me to resist these urges and lose weight. I am so disappointed in myself.

This week's weigh in showed that I had lost a lb. Although this is because last week I had a thick heavy jumper on and this week a light top.

 

[232kat]

This week I need to stop putting pressure on myself and setting unachievable goals. I make the requirements so tight that when I can't stick to them, because they are unrealistic, I go to pieces and stuff my face. I have to get it in my head that loosing 3 stone by March is not achievable and a more realistic goal is half that or getting into the 15s.

The same goes for unrealistic exercise programs. I was trying to do the C25K three days a week followed by 30 min swims. I think I should choose one option and stick to it, than doing too much, ending up too tired and then not doing anything in the end.

In this week leading up to Christmas I aim to change my upward trend and add to this week's lb loss.

Wednesday 17/12/14 EE Day

B: speedy fruit salad

L: salad with tuna mayonnaise (3)

D: breaded parmesan chicken (B.) + (A), with salad and potatoes; 25g Ketchup (1.5)

S: 100ml semi skimmed milk (2.5), chewing gum (2), ice cream 100g mixed frozen berries with 1 tub Quark (1.5).

Finally after going to bed I woke up a little later hungry so demolished 2 syn free yogurts, which is far better that sweets, then went straight back to bed.

Total syns 11.5

 

[232kat]

Thursday 18/12/14 EE Day

B: 35g porridge oats (B.), free yogurt and mixed berries

L: jacket potato and tuna mayonnaise (5)

D: kebab (20), 2 tubes rolos (25)

S: 250ml semi skimmed milk (A), speedy fruit salad, chewing gum (2)

Total syns 52

Today was a disaster in all senses of the word. I went to take the dogs out and my oldest dog, a 13 year old golden retriever named Archie, could not stand up properly. As I was running late for work I woke my husband up to investigate and rushed off.

The rest of the day was fine and on plan until after 4 when my husband came through from the switch board. My phone had been in my bag and I hadn't heard it ringing. He was in a bit of a state as he had gone off to work lunch time and Archie had still not be able to stand.
So we both rushed home from work to take him to the vets, thinking this was the day we had been expecting for a while - Archie already has difficulties with walking and to get out of our home or to the garden you have to go down a lot of steps, so in my mind I was convinced that he would have to go to sleep. Anyway, as always happens getting home was a nightmare. I checked the bus times and thought it would be quicker to get a taxi, only to find it wasn't and three buses went sailing by together before I could get back to the bus stop. Therefore, I had to change the vets appointment to a different time at a partner surgery further away.

Once on the bus heading home, all seats were taken so I was left standing when the bus driver did an emergency stop and I went flying down the aisle of the bus ending up in a crumpled heap on the floor, crashing against the driver door on my way down. Only one person got up to help me. After asking if I was ok she sat down and no person offered to give up their seat. The driver kept asking if I was ok as it had been quite bad. All I wanted was to get home to my dog, so the last thing I wanted to do was give him the opportunity to delay the bus.

Eventually I arrived home and we went to the vets. By then I was in a terrible state, along with Archie, as I honestly felt like this would be goodbye for us. Anyway, we have had a reprieve, the vets has given us painkillers and anti inflammatory pills to see if this makes an improvement. If not it will be goodbye, but this will be done in the comfort of his home with us surrounding him. If he improves then we get to treasure him for a few more months.

Finally back at home I really couldn't be bothered to make something to eat and there was nothing to snack on, that's how I ended up with a kebab and the rolos were just a way of topping off a bad day. No excuses, but I quit smoking 40 cigarettes a day 10 years ago and if there had been any near me today I probably would have had some of them as well. So whilst I could not quit the food addiction, on the positive side I'm still a non smoker and I still have my dog for at least over Christmas.

 

[232kat]

Friday, Saturday and Sunday

Totally off plan. Call it comfort eating or just plain greed, but I have eaten sweets and rubbish till I felt uncomfortably full and sick. I nearly made the worst mistake ever and had my dog put down and got that I feel bad.

I am so thankful the vet talked us into trialling the tablets. Even though it is slow progress, my dog is gradually placing his bad leg on the floor and managing to hobble around in doors. I love him so much I can't imagine a world without him.

I know this is only a reprieve but any time with him is a bonus and he seems happy enough.

 

[232kat]

Monday 22/12/14 Red Day

B: 400g Speedy Fruit Salad and free yogurt

L: Cauliflower Cheese Soup (1/2 A)

D: Breaded parmesan chicken and salad (1/2 A)+(B.)

S: 250ml semi skimmed milk (A), 2 Aldi benefit bars (B.), 1/2 tub quark and 100g frozen berries blitzed (1.5), meringue (2.5), chewing gum (1)