This is me...my incredible journey
- Thread starter weebles
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LadyT
Tough But Sexy X
Aw my lovely what a moving post, want to start with your 3lb first though, brilliant bl**dy brilliant!
As for the loss of your son, I cant begin to imagine how or what that must feel like for you and your family. I hope you have decided to do something special, that means a lot to you and will mark the occasion in a fitting way that will help you dela with your thoughts and feelings.
Luv ya hun, big hugs xxx
As for the loss of your son, I cant begin to imagine how or what that must feel like for you and your family. I hope you have decided to do something special, that means a lot to you and will mark the occasion in a fitting way that will help you dela with your thoughts and feelings.
Luv ya hun, big hugs xxx
slendablenda
Gold Member
Thank you for telling us Weebly.
I agree about the psychological side of LL. I have never known another diet/programme like it. You get to a stage where the weight loss is still important, but in a strange way almost insignificant because somehow you gain the ability to deal with issues you thought you had buried deep within your psyche.
In fact, buried underneath all that food.
Peel it away, allow yourself to acknowledge and deal with those feelings. Difficult, but essential. Isn't it strange that you find yourself telling people who were recently strangers, things you thought you'd never share with another soul.
Don[t ask me why- it just works.
Peace hun xxx
I agree about the psychological side of LL. I have never known another diet/programme like it. You get to a stage where the weight loss is still important, but in a strange way almost insignificant because somehow you gain the ability to deal with issues you thought you had buried deep within your psyche.
In fact, buried underneath all that food.
Peel it away, allow yourself to acknowledge and deal with those feelings. Difficult, but essential. Isn't it strange that you find yourself telling people who were recently strangers, things you thought you'd never share with another soul.
Don[t ask me why- it just works.
Peace hun xxx
weebles
AKA...the WEEB
OMGosh...thank you ALL! Got a little misty eyed reading the posts above. Yes SB, this telling on here helps and much easier to get out - stumps me to no end.
Today we are going to the garden centre and I will select a rose bush and plant it. From that point on - I will always have a place to go an visit. OH....just thought of something else (now don't get upset). My son was buried but was buried while I was having a melt down (psych ward). Apparently his grave is unmarked and to this day I have not a clue where it is - sounds odd and out of the ordinary. My ex did it this way as it was cheap and held this over my head for years (he was an abuser/manipulater/all round mean person....I call him Mr. A. Hole for short). That wonderful woman is gonna work with me and help me locate the grave and I will then take it from there. Again, don't be upset anyone - there is so much to this story that would reduce you to tears. I have cried enough over this and it is time to deal with this and get peace of mind back.
Have a FAB day everyone. I have already been for my morning walk - 30 second jig included on that. Ready to seize the day!! Life is going on and WILL go on.
Peeling the onion is hard work SB - and I have LL to thank for this. You are so right - no other program is like this, and glad I am doing it!
xxx
Seize ladies....SEIZE your day
Today we are going to the garden centre and I will select a rose bush and plant it. From that point on - I will always have a place to go an visit. OH....just thought of something else (now don't get upset). My son was buried but was buried while I was having a melt down (psych ward). Apparently his grave is unmarked and to this day I have not a clue where it is - sounds odd and out of the ordinary. My ex did it this way as it was cheap and held this over my head for years (he was an abuser/manipulater/all round mean person....I call him Mr. A. Hole for short). That wonderful woman is gonna work with me and help me locate the grave and I will then take it from there. Again, don't be upset anyone - there is so much to this story that would reduce you to tears. I have cried enough over this and it is time to deal with this and get peace of mind back.
Have a FAB day everyone. I have already been for my morning walk - 30 second jig included on that. Ready to seize the day!! Life is going on and WILL go on.
Peeling the onion is hard work SB - and I have LL to thank for this. You are so right - no other program is like this, and glad I am doing it!
xxx
Seize ladies....SEIZE your day
MagdaX
is Magdalicious
Too late! I'm already in floods of tears!!!
Sending you the biggest hug I could find.
I can appreciate (to a degree) what you're going through as I have been there myself. At 16 years old I lost a baby when I was 5 months pregnant. I was in a relationship with a very abusive and aggressive man who used to beat me up on a regular basis and yes even when I was pregnant with his child. This one day he hit me a bit too hard and I miscarried our child. A little girl.
I never got to see her as they had to do an emergency cesarean and I was put to sleep. I was put on very strong meds for weeks after because they were so scared I'd hurt myself so those few weeks have been a blur ever since. I don't remember much of it and I also don't know where the baby was buried. My family never talks about it and with time we all decided we are going to erase that period of time out of our memory.
She would have been 16 this year the same age I was when I had her.
I never ever ever talk about it. In fact I don't even think about it anymore. Not sure if it's a good or a bad thing.
Anyway. I just wanted to let you know I feel your pain and I am here for you if you need me.
You're amazing and I thank you for opening up to us and telling us about it. It definitely helped me to open up about my past too.
Keep smiling sweet lady and well done on your 3lbs loss too!!
Hugs xxxxx
Sent from my iPhone 4 using MiniMins
Sending you the biggest hug I could find.
I can appreciate (to a degree) what you're going through as I have been there myself. At 16 years old I lost a baby when I was 5 months pregnant. I was in a relationship with a very abusive and aggressive man who used to beat me up on a regular basis and yes even when I was pregnant with his child. This one day he hit me a bit too hard and I miscarried our child. A little girl.
I never got to see her as they had to do an emergency cesarean and I was put to sleep. I was put on very strong meds for weeks after because they were so scared I'd hurt myself so those few weeks have been a blur ever since. I don't remember much of it and I also don't know where the baby was buried. My family never talks about it and with time we all decided we are going to erase that period of time out of our memory.
She would have been 16 this year the same age I was when I had her.
I never ever ever talk about it. In fact I don't even think about it anymore. Not sure if it's a good or a bad thing.
Anyway. I just wanted to let you know I feel your pain and I am here for you if you need me.
You're amazing and I thank you for opening up to us and telling us about it. It definitely helped me to open up about my past too.
Keep smiling sweet lady and well done on your 3lbs loss too!!
Hugs xxxxx
Sent from my iPhone 4 using MiniMins
LadyT
Tough But Sexy X
Omg ladies, I am so sorry fir both of you but also very proud for digging deep and sharing your very moving posts! I am in awe of you both!
Weebs you sound so positive about the decisions you have made about how to deal with this now! A Rose sounds so fitting, in a special place where you can go to be alone with your thoughts and feelings.
As for the abusive man aspect there aren't many of us that haven't experienced that first hand in some way shape or form! What doesn't kill us makes us stronger beautiful always remember that!
Luv and biggest hugs ever xxx
Sent from my iPhone using MiniMins
Weebs you sound so positive about the decisions you have made about how to deal with this now! A Rose sounds so fitting, in a special place where you can go to be alone with your thoughts and feelings.
As for the abusive man aspect there aren't many of us that haven't experienced that first hand in some way shape or form! What doesn't kill us makes us stronger beautiful always remember that!
Luv and biggest hugs ever xxx
Sent from my iPhone using MiniMins
slendablenda
Gold Member
Another sad story Mags. You may be ale to put it to the back of your mind most of the time, but you know you'll never forget, just like Weebles. I am convinced that's why we try and bury these tough life experiences under mounds of food and drink. Then one day, when we feel strong enough, we let them back so we can try and deal with them and make some peace in our lives. xx
Swanseacity123
Full Member
Well done on the 3 pound loss-excellent news! I agree with the whole 'onion' thing and the layers will soon be peeled away and we can all deal with the issues that have brought us to where we are today!
Without sounding 'twee' i am sure your son would be incredibly proud of your achievements over recent months, although i am not so sure he would be proud of the not being able to use the IPOD!! lol I have a similar IPod story and hope it brings a smile to your face, well it does in our house! I am 32 and should be 'with it' in terms of technology but i swear me and my hubby were born in the wrong era-very traditional! LOL Anyhow xmas i thought what can i buy him (bear in mind it was Xmas eve-very late to have no present and not usual for me who is so organised normally) anyhow decided on an Ipod! Was so impressed with myself-got my brother to help put some albums on anyhow my god by Boxing Day i only managed to delete them and delete them off itune-to this day i don't even know how i did it! I remember going to my GP for an appointment not long after and even she talked about 'U didn't pull it out when it was syncing did u???' (My GP is over 60 and my god even she knew what 'syncing was!!!' lol) Anyhow enough of that showing myself up now, thank u for sharing your story - takes a lot sometimes and we are all different (as u can tell my way is to talk and talk my problems-sometimes too much too soon)
Have a fab week
Without sounding 'twee' i am sure your son would be incredibly proud of your achievements over recent months, although i am not so sure he would be proud of the not being able to use the IPOD!! lol I have a similar IPod story and hope it brings a smile to your face, well it does in our house! I am 32 and should be 'with it' in terms of technology but i swear me and my hubby were born in the wrong era-very traditional! LOL Anyhow xmas i thought what can i buy him (bear in mind it was Xmas eve-very late to have no present and not usual for me who is so organised normally) anyhow decided on an Ipod! Was so impressed with myself-got my brother to help put some albums on anyhow my god by Boxing Day i only managed to delete them and delete them off itune-to this day i don't even know how i did it! I remember going to my GP for an appointment not long after and even she talked about 'U didn't pull it out when it was syncing did u???' (My GP is over 60 and my god even she knew what 'syncing was!!!' lol) Anyhow enough of that showing myself up now, thank u for sharing your story - takes a lot sometimes and we are all different (as u can tell my way is to talk and talk my problems-sometimes too much too soon)
Have a fab week
gracielou09
Silver Member
Like I said to you on FB we are all here for you Weebs. Probably easier to let it out on this forum than face to face. I'm so glad you have found this lady to help and guide you through this. Roses are my favourite flower, such a lovely tribute to your son and somewhere for you to go to grieve and celebrate him. So proud of you my lovely lady and I know you hate hugs but tuff boobies I'm sending you loads of them so get used to it xxxxxxxxxxx
Mags, You are a brave young lady, I'm sending you love and big hugs too. xxxxx
:wave_cry:
Mags, You are a brave young lady, I'm sending you love and big hugs too. xxxxx
:wave_cry:
Clarabow
Silver Member
I am lost for words ladies. Nothing profound to say or words of wisdom to offer. You amaze me for sharing such pain. LIfe really is not a bowl of cherries on times. Those we have lost are always with us in our hearts. Which is no consolation when we are grieving and dealing with our issues xx
Thinking of you ladies xx
Thinking of you ladies xx
MagdaX
is Magdalicious
Oh dear
Feeling a bit bad about posting all this on someone else's thread.
I'm sorry.
I'm not trying to compare my experiences to anyone else's but I felt like maybe I could understand what weebs feels.
I feel a bit uneasy about sharing that with all of you as I haven't talked about it for years.
I hope it will lead to good things and help me deal with my issues (which like SB said def have something to do with my past)
I just want to once again say how much respect I have for you and I am here for you if you need me xxx
Sent from my iPhone 4 using MiniMins
Feeling a bit bad about posting all this on someone else's thread.
I'm sorry.
I'm not trying to compare my experiences to anyone else's but I felt like maybe I could understand what weebs feels.
I feel a bit uneasy about sharing that with all of you as I haven't talked about it for years.
I hope it will lead to good things and help me deal with my issues (which like SB said def have something to do with my past)
I just want to once again say how much respect I have for you and I am here for you if you need me xxx
Sent from my iPhone 4 using MiniMins
gracielou09
Silver Member
Oh dear
Feeling a bit bad about posting all this on someone else's thread.
I'm sorry.
I'm not trying to compare my experiences to anyone else's but I felt like maybe I could understand what weebs feels.
I feel a bit uneasy about sharing that with all of you as I haven't talked about it for years.
I hope it will lead to good things and help me deal with my issues (which like SB said def have something to do with my past)
I just want to once again say how much respect I have for you and I am here for you if you need me xxx
Sent from my iPhone 4 using MiniMins
Ah Magda, i dont think anyone would read it like that, your just expressing the fact you can relate to weebs and that you understand some of the feelings she may have and untimately that your there for her. I thought it was a brave post huni xxxxxxxx
Helen
Full Member
Hi Weebles
I am uncertain how to start this post as I have been reading peoples diaries in order to gain motivation in the early days of my lighter life journey and I feel a bit like I have read something that I shouldn't have. Under normal circumstances I would have just backed out of the diary and not posted anything but I was wondering whether you have any photographs of your son? If so, would you consider scrapbooking? It can be quite carthartic, and I was looking at some layouts last night that two people did who lost their children at 2 and 7, they have made beautiful and lasting tributes their sons. Thankfully I have not had to deal with the tragedy that you have but scrapbooking pictures of my childhood has helped me reach a peaceful place where I have been able to let go of the past. Its just an idea, and one that you might not be able to face yet but may find comforting in the future.
The rose sounds like a beautiful idea and personally I think that you will find that visiting the grave will help enormously.
Magda, my heart goes out to you too. I hope that everything goes well for both of you on your journeys and that you both find peace x
I am uncertain how to start this post as I have been reading peoples diaries in order to gain motivation in the early days of my lighter life journey and I feel a bit like I have read something that I shouldn't have. Under normal circumstances I would have just backed out of the diary and not posted anything but I was wondering whether you have any photographs of your son? If so, would you consider scrapbooking? It can be quite carthartic, and I was looking at some layouts last night that two people did who lost their children at 2 and 7, they have made beautiful and lasting tributes their sons. Thankfully I have not had to deal with the tragedy that you have but scrapbooking pictures of my childhood has helped me reach a peaceful place where I have been able to let go of the past. Its just an idea, and one that you might not be able to face yet but may find comforting in the future.
The rose sounds like a beautiful idea and personally I think that you will find that visiting the grave will help enormously.
Magda, my heart goes out to you too. I hope that everything goes well for both of you on your journeys and that you both find peace x
HannahNewton
Loves to post
Thank you for sharing your stories with us Weebles and Magda!!
This program is so much more than just about the food for sure.
If it was as simple as eat less, exercise more - we would only need to do one diet!!
Finding the reasons and emotions behind the over eating is the key to success.
I love the idea of a memorial rose - kisses xx
This program is so much more than just about the food for sure.
If it was as simple as eat less, exercise more - we would only need to do one diet!!
Finding the reasons and emotions behind the over eating is the key to success.
I love the idea of a memorial rose - kisses xx
weebles
AKA...the WEEB
OMGOSH Ladies! I am overwhelmed by all this. Magda? I adore you and am by no means upset for posting your pain on here - my gosh, I shared this and if someone else had or is going through something similar and it brings things to light - then what happened to me is no longer an empty piece of my heart. I hope that made sense.
All you beautiful, wonderful ladies on here - WOW. I am actually crying (not an easy task...trust me).
As for photos of my son? None Mr. A. Hole got rid of everything. I was not allowed to grieve nor talk about what happened. He blamed me for years for the death and would bring it up in one of his drunken episodes OR, if I began to show forms of a life by being happy. Yes, A. hole was abusive and i was his punching bag. I suffered cracked ribs, broken wrist, broken nose, black eyes and burns on my body where he would extinguish his cigarettes. That was the physical ...the emotional is far worse.
I left A. hole after the birth of our second son when he was just weeks old. The decider was when my son, who was colicky, was crying in pain and he picked him up by his ankles and was about to batter him because he wouldn't be quiet. I grabbed my son, and shoved A.hole to the floor with all my might. I then took the beating of my life (rather me than my son). I was unrecogniseable afterwards, and I knew then....I had to leave. He had bought a gun, and it was just a matter of time before my son and i would be its target.
Oh...enough about this....back then, abused women needed proof. The police needed witnesses and would not take my word over his. There were very few Women's shelters and I had no friends to seek help. Abusers make sure you have no friends...and no life.
Sorry for this long post - not my intent. I have kept this in for a very long time .
xx
All you beautiful, wonderful ladies on here - WOW. I am actually crying (not an easy task...trust me).
As for photos of my son? None
Mr. A. Hole got rid of everything. I was not allowed to grieve nor talk about what happened. He blamed me for years for the death and would bring it up in one of his drunken episodes OR, if I began to show forms of a life by being happy. Yes, A. hole was abusive and i was his punching bag. I suffered cracked ribs, broken wrist, broken nose, black eyes and burns on my body where he would extinguish his cigarettes. That was the physical ...the emotional is far worse. I left A. hole after the birth of our second son when he was just weeks old. The decider was when my son, who was colicky, was crying in pain and he picked him up by his ankles and was about to batter him because he wouldn't be quiet. I grabbed my son, and shoved A.hole to the floor with all my might. I then took the beating of my life (rather me than my son). I was unrecogniseable afterwards, and I knew then....I had to leave. He had bought a gun, and it was just a matter of time before my son and i would be its target.
Oh...enough about this....back then, abused women needed proof. The police needed witnesses and would not take my word over his. There were very few Women's shelters and I had no friends to seek help. Abusers make sure you have no friends...and no life.
Sorry for this long post - not my intent. I have kept this in for a very long time .
xx
weebles
AKA...the WEEB
Okay...CHEERY time!!!
THis is Week 14? Or something like that.
Yesterday was GREAT! Lots accomplished. Rose bush is in and loving the rain we had today.
Also yesterday I did an early morning walk of around 5miles - nice quick pace at THAT!!
Spent some time in town - i DID have a starbucks caffé latte - skinny. Just felt like one.
Later that night, a friend called me up ad she and I went back down to the beach for another walk!! OMG, by the time I got home my dogs were BARKING! I couldn't even MOVE, ran the bath, put in some epsom salts and just soaked for an hour. Crawled into bed and that was me GONE for the night.
Meals - no variation
water intake? - really needed to be better as I had a headache all day
THis is Week 14? Or something like that.
Yesterday was GREAT! Lots accomplished. Rose bush is in and loving the rain we had today.
Also yesterday I did an early morning walk of around 5miles - nice quick pace at THAT!!
Spent some time in town - i DID have a starbucks caffé latte - skinny. Just felt like one.
Later that night, a friend called me up ad she and I went back down to the beach for another walk!! OMG, by the time I got home my dogs were BARKING! I couldn't even MOVE, ran the bath, put in some epsom salts and just soaked for an hour. Crawled into bed and that was me GONE for the night.
Meals - no variation
water intake? - really needed to be better as I had a headache all day
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