SallyVater
Gold Member
Thinking of you
ConstantlyDizzy 2015
- Thread starter constantlydizzy
- Start date
constantlydizzy
Gold Member
hello minis
just dropping in to say hello. Things here are not too great, its hard seeing tony in so much pain but hopefully that will be eased when macmillan come tomorrow. I was a bit miffed when we went to hosp on Friday that he wasn't offered more painwise.....but we just saw the oncologist who took us through his option of having further chemo just to try reduce the cancer and pain a little, tho he did point out it may not be of any help and he was so poorly from it last time I don't lnow whether he will stand 9 weeks of treatment again. Tony was told to think about it this weekend and let them know when macmillan comes on Monday if he wants to proceed. Tony asked the awful question of how the cancer is likely to proceed and how it might kill him.....they were extremely graphic and I cant get their words out of my head. I cant believe he asked as hes not wanted to know anything during his treatment....its been left to me to read their literature etc.
Tony not even got out of bed the last 2 days, hes finding it harder to breathe as the cancer is now on the outside of his skin too right around his trachy stoma. I think I will be taking him back to the ward in the next day or two if it carries on.
I'm trying to sleep when he nods off and making sure I at least have some porridge for breakfast......other than that its all just a blur of giving pain relief and waiting till he drops off again.
We've tried discussing his funeral....but even he got a little weepy at this, all I know for sure is he wants me to take him back 'home' for it where we used to live in Yorkshire so I need to find out how I arrange this all.
sorry im not getting around to anyones diaries, its hard finding chance and the right words to put on my own at the moment.
love
Kathryn xx
just dropping in to say hello. Things here are not too great, its hard seeing tony in so much pain but hopefully that will be eased when macmillan come tomorrow. I was a bit miffed when we went to hosp on Friday that he wasn't offered more painwise.....but we just saw the oncologist who took us through his option of having further chemo just to try reduce the cancer and pain a little, tho he did point out it may not be of any help and he was so poorly from it last time I don't lnow whether he will stand 9 weeks of treatment again. Tony was told to think about it this weekend and let them know when macmillan comes on Monday if he wants to proceed. Tony asked the awful question of how the cancer is likely to proceed and how it might kill him.....they were extremely graphic and I cant get their words out of my head. I cant believe he asked as hes not wanted to know anything during his treatment....its been left to me to read their literature etc.
Tony not even got out of bed the last 2 days, hes finding it harder to breathe as the cancer is now on the outside of his skin too right around his trachy stoma. I think I will be taking him back to the ward in the next day or two if it carries on.
I'm trying to sleep when he nods off and making sure I at least have some porridge for breakfast......other than that its all just a blur of giving pain relief and waiting till he drops off again.
We've tried discussing his funeral....but even he got a little weepy at this, all I know for sure is he wants me to take him back 'home' for it where we used to live in Yorkshire so I need to find out how I arrange this all.
sorry im not getting around to anyones diaries, its hard finding chance and the right words to put on my own at the moment.
love
Kathryn xx
SallyVater
Gold Member
Sweetheart. You are being so strong and brave and its a testament to your love for Tony. I hope Macmillan will be helpful for you both - I've heard good things about them.
You take care. x
You take care. x
Liverbird52
Gold Member
Thinking of you Dizzy xx
constantlydizzy
Gold Member
hello all.....hope everyone is ok.
Tony ended up back in hospital after I last updated on here.....just for 2 days while they monitored him and hes home again now. Been struggling with his breathing since the stoma has started getting blocked with the cancer re growth so he now has oxygen at home.
The Macmillan and district nurses have been great, they've put together an emergency 'just in case injection pack' which we now have safe for when things get bad so I can ring and they try get here within half hour to administer,
we had a meeting with the family doctor who was equally very nice.....it was a little heart wrenching tho to hear yet another person say he has not got much time left
hes also completed a DO NOT resuscitate form in case any one decides to call an ambulance or anything happens while we are out somewhere.....this got me upset as it seems like the final bit now.
Painwise he has had a very bad week with it and because the cancer is now on the outside of his throat which keeps oozing bad stuff and bleeding a lot. Macmillan have increased his morphine and added steroids plus pregabalin. hes now on in a single dose what he was taking in an entire 24hrs so it must be agony for him.
Managed to get him out to the solicitor for our appointment, weve had our wills re drafted and also arranged to have my name put on the house deeds so im fully protected in that respect. I'm slowly putting together a list of important info to do with all house/car insurances MOT and when things like that are due......im feeling a little overwhelmed with things just now and can feel my bipolar re emerging and slipping to the darkside again so im seeing the doctor tomorrow before things get too bad again.
Anyway that's about all ive got to tell you, mugging on here making sure tony is up to date with his pain relief and in between im busy getting his power tools, golf clubs etc ready for ebay....not nice getting rid of stuff but theyre no good cluttering up the place here and may as well try get some money for them as a lot he only bought to do up mums house so nearly new.
il be in touch soon xx
Tony ended up back in hospital after I last updated on here.....just for 2 days while they monitored him and hes home again now. Been struggling with his breathing since the stoma has started getting blocked with the cancer re growth so he now has oxygen at home.
The Macmillan and district nurses have been great, they've put together an emergency 'just in case injection pack' which we now have safe for when things get bad so I can ring and they try get here within half hour to administer,
we had a meeting with the family doctor who was equally very nice.....it was a little heart wrenching tho to hear yet another person say he has not got much time left
hes also completed a DO NOT resuscitate form in case any one decides to call an ambulance or anything happens while we are out somewhere.....this got me upset as it seems like the final bit now.Painwise he has had a very bad week with it and because the cancer is now on the outside of his throat which keeps oozing bad stuff and bleeding a lot. Macmillan have increased his morphine and added steroids plus pregabalin. hes now on in a single dose what he was taking in an entire 24hrs so it must be agony for him.
Managed to get him out to the solicitor for our appointment, weve had our wills re drafted and also arranged to have my name put on the house deeds so im fully protected in that respect. I'm slowly putting together a list of important info to do with all house/car insurances MOT and when things like that are due......im feeling a little overwhelmed with things just now and can feel my bipolar re emerging and slipping to the darkside again so im seeing the doctor tomorrow before things get too bad again.
Anyway that's about all ive got to tell you, mugging on here making sure tony is up to date with his pain relief and in between im busy getting his power tools, golf clubs etc ready for ebay....not nice getting rid of stuff but theyre no good cluttering up the place here and may as well try get some money for them as a lot he only bought to do up mums house so nearly new.
il be in touch soon xx
Liverbird52
Gold Member
Take care of yourself and tTony xxx we are thinking of you both xx
Texty_F
Gold Member
hello all.....hope everyone is ok.
Tony ended up back in hospital after I last updated on here.....just for 2 days while they monitored him and hes home again now. Been struggling with his breathing since the stoma has started getting blocked with the cancer re growth so he now has oxygen at home.
The Macmillan and district nurses have been great, they've put together an emergency 'just in case injection pack' which we now have safe for when things get bad so I can ring and they try get here within half hour to administer,
we had a meeting with the family doctor who was equally very nice.....it was a little heart wrenching tho to hear yet another person say he has not got much time left
Painwise he has had a very bad week with it and because the cancer is now on the outside of his throat which keeps oozing bad stuff and bleeding a lot. Macmillan have increased his morphine and added steroids plus pregabalin. hes now on in a single dose what he was taking in an entire 24hrs so it must be agony for him.
Managed to get him out to the solicitor for our appointment, weve had our wills re drafted and also arranged to have my name put on the house deeds so im fully protected in that respect. I'm slowly putting together a list of important info to do with all house/car insurances MOT and when things like that are due......im feeling a little overwhelmed with things just now and can feel my bipolar re emerging and slipping to the darkside again so im seeing the doctor tomorrow before things get too bad again.
Anyway that's about all ive got to tell you, mugging on here making sure tony is up to date with his pain relief and in between im busy getting his power tools, golf clubs etc ready for ebay....not nice getting rid of stuff but theyre no good cluttering up the place here and may as well try get some money for them as a lot he only bought to do up mums house so nearly new.
il be in touch soon xx
Sorry to hear Tony ended up back in hospital - you did say in your last post it would probably happen. The MacMillan teams are amazing Ive had lots of dealings with them, as I said before dont ever be scared to ask them anything at all. I know it feels dreadful that your having to sort stuff now before he goes, but you will look back and be glad you did. Its a horrible waiting game, all you can do is keep him pain free and comfortable. Make sure you talk to him dont shut yourself off - try and keep the conversation as "normal" as possible so that he doesnt dwell on whats happening.
Glad to read you got sorted at the solicitors hun, that must have put your mind at rest a little. Sorting his stuff out will keep you pre occupied but make sure you look after yourself, you need to eat etc and keep going. Its good your seeing your GP that will help you a lot.
Dont forget were all here as a sounding board for you if you need a rant or just a general blether.
Love to you both xxxxx
SallyVater
Gold Member
I feel like I'm just repeating myself, and others, when I say again that I just don't know what to say, but I wanted you to know that I'm thinking of you. Plus Texty has such a great way with words that she's said it all. x
Liverbird52
Gold Member
Hi Dizzy x just popping in to say hello and thinking of you xx take care xx
Happy Holidays
Gold Member
Thinking of you in what must be such a tough time for you both, I hope you're getting all the help you deserve xx
Liverbird52
Gold Member
Thinking of you both Dizzy xxxxxxx
SallyVater
Gold Member
Sending love to you xx
Liverbird52
Gold Member
((((Hugs)))) Dizzy xxxx
constantlydizzy
Gold Member
Hi minis
time for an overdue update.
Tony has been getting steadily worse the last few weeks so they have taken him into the hospice to try get on top of the pain. He's losing the sight in one eye which they say is down to the tumour being near the nreves to the eye. I miss him like crazy not being here.....but at the same time I have a little feeling of relief that people who know what theyre doing are looking after him for a while. Its much easier than when hes been in hospital to visit as the hospice is only 10 minutes away from here and not a very nasty drive.
not much else to report really......im still badly in need of getting on the slimming wagon.....but right now my heads not in the right place.
Hope everyone is doing ok, il be back a little more while hes away x
time for an overdue update.
Tony has been getting steadily worse the last few weeks so they have taken him into the hospice to try get on top of the pain. He's losing the sight in one eye which they say is down to the tumour being near the nreves to the eye. I miss him like crazy not being here.....but at the same time I have a little feeling of relief that people who know what theyre doing are looking after him for a while. Its much easier than when hes been in hospital to visit as the hospice is only 10 minutes away from here and not a very nasty drive.
not much else to report really......im still badly in need of getting on the slimming wagon.....but right now my heads not in the right place.
Hope everyone is doing ok, il be back a little more while hes away x
