Hi honey,
I've just been catching up with your posts over the past couple of days and am really blown away by the amount of soul-searching and introspection you've been through - but, most of all, how incredibly self-aware and astute you are about why you feel the way you do .. and also the contradictions about knowing that most of it really IS 'codswallop' but not being able to reconcile that with the way it makes you feel.
You don't need me to tell you what I think about you as I think you already know I think you're fab - but it's not about what I (or anyone else) thinks, but how you feel about yourself. I kinda sense that you're starting to realise that looks (and body size come to that) really aren't everything - especially where men are concerned. From my own experience, men have their own insecurities (loads of 'em!) and are more attracted to a woman who makes them feel good about themselves rather than just having a 'trophy' girlfriend on their arm. Frankly, the ones who really do just want a 'trophy' wouldn't be the ones you should want to go out with anyway.
The first time I met you in Newcastle you were an absolute man-magnet - and I've told you this already! You don't see it I know, but you have an innate sexiness that has absolutely nothing to do with the way you look or what size/weight you are. You just have 'it' - whatever 'it' is. You can't buy it, you can't learn it, you can't cultivate it ... you either have it or you don't. And you truly do. To the point where I'm actually jealous as I'd love to have whatever it is you have!
I'm so thrilled that you've got past 2 weeks SS'ing - I know how tough it is, but also how confidence-building it is too when you see those scales moving ever downwards. Keep it going, honey .. you deserve every bit of success and happiness you get
Lots of love, as always
