I have done a really stupid thing guys :cry: and could really use some help and inspiration right now.
Apart from the odd day of refocusing I have been in a month long binge eating cycle, for the first time ever i have even attempted purging
In fact it is that , that has bought be to my senses.
I could blame so many things empty nest syndrome as youngest is about to depart and oldest has gone to live in germany big changes at work (again) as once more they are reconfigureing our services. my gym went into recievership a fortnight ago which completly disrupted the routine i had set up, but it does just come down to the fact that i am an absolute idiot.
Same old story i over eat and then feel bad about myself so do it again then feel even worse so do it again.
to top it all i stupidly stopped taking my meds, i really should have known better but obviously i am an idiot and thats putting it mildly.
Now i need to break the cycle, i am drifting into old habits, making excuses to not go out and avoiding situations that i think will challange me. I have reread the first few pages of my diary and i don't want to go back there but reading some of the cognitive therepy stuff has got me thinking
not plucked up the courage to weigh my self yet, but sure i am almost back to square one :cry: I am such a fool
sorry for the depressing post but i needed to confess really and am hoping that by doing so it will help me, seeing it in writing makes it seem so pathetic xxx