Tina's diary of hopefull optimism!

[Legomom]

Just kill me now pleeeeeaaase. I'm done with this week fed up and feel blue

Had ANOTHER massive public meltdown. In morrisons. Oh joy. This time a random woman (haha autocorrect keeps putting Rwandan not random) actually took a look at my screaming ten yr old and muttered 'disgusting' then stepped over him. Sadly he didn't leg her up. Had to ditch my trolley and run. Joey crying, jamie utterly out of it and just howling so I've got him slung over my shoulder , sara all quiet and sad.

Can't even explain how mortifying it is when this happens. Three dozen shoppers all gawping at you..... Knowing that they'll go home and relate the story of that awfull child and his useless mother to their bloody spouse/sister/colleague. The assumptions they make (single mom multiple fathers on the dole....) and then they carry on with their perfect little narrow minded pointless lives.

Think it was one humiliation too many. Had to pull over halfway home for a 25 panic attack. Which I'm really unhappy about as A) it scared the kids and B) I e not had one since I was depressed in my early 20's after my family disowned me!!!

It might be a few days before I can find the silver lining this time

 

[Caz]

How ****ing dare she! People like that are the ones that disgust me! Who are you to stand there and judge someone else?! You have absolutely no idea why someone is the way that they are and you have no idea what's going on behind the scenes. If J had Down's Syndrome and did the same, would she have reacted the same way? I doubt it because she would be able to see that there was an issue beyond just a bratty child. J's Aspergers might not be something that she can physically see but it's still there so she has absolutely no right to judge like that and there are so many other hidden conditions, you can't just think brat. It's completely out of order. Grr if I'd been there she would have gotten a few words from me!

You know what though, don't worry about her and her pathetic, narrow mind or the other shoppers that saw you. Whatever it is that they stood there thinking, whatever they head home and tell people about you, you know it's not true and at the end of the day, you don't know any of them, you'll probably never see them again and so their opinion doesn't matter. They're not the ones who have to live, deal and cope with having a child who has Asperger's so they haven't got a clue, in the slightest. Personally, I think you're doing an amazing job. It's not easy, I know it's not but I really do think you're doing the best that you can do and that best is pretty good. Think about swimming the other day and how J calmed himself down after using those strategies that you've been teaching him, you didn't have to remind him, he did it himself. That is a huge, huge achievement that a lot of people struggle to reach so the fact that you have means that you should not only be proud of J but of yourself too because it's down to you.

I know it's hard at the moment and nothing that anyone says will take away the humiliation of what happened but just know, you're not a bad mum, at all, and these blips aren't your fault and really don't reflect on you, no matter what those people who don't know you or the situation think. Really hope that you have a better day today chick.

 

[NumNums]

Awww hun, some people really just need to stop being so narrow minded.

The thing is, when I was naive, young, narrow minded... I used to look at people who's kids misbehaved and be like 'oh see that!'. But then I had kids myself and I know even if they have no disabilities, they can be little shits. My daughter is the worst and she can throw that sort of tantrum by just me telling her to wait till we get to the car for her to have a pack of crisps.

You can't tell me that woman's child has never played up. I look at other mums these days with the face 'I know your pain'.

Chin up hun x

 

[Legomom]

Meh. Feel poo today. Hubby is off work and I want to throttle him. No reason. He's just irritating me half to death. Tempted to log my WI today as I feel a piggy day brewing. And I've had a darn good loss this week lol

 

[Caz]

Nooo keep the WI and try to use that as motivation not to have a piggy day? If you do though, I'd probably log it too, you deserve a good loss. Maybe as your hubby is home you could take yourself off out for a bit for some space?

 

[Legomom]

Nooo keep the WI and try to use that as motivation not to have a piggy day? If you do though, I'd probably log it too, you deserve a good loss. Maybe as your hubby is home you could take yourself off out for a bit for some space?

I'm stuck finishing Shakespeare's house gotta supervise while she paints the walls and roof, then sticks on lollipop stick timbers and draws the roof tiles on. Oh and then she's going to paint the windows in with silver paint and draw the leading on with a black pen after lol bit of cotton wool smoke for the chimneys and all We have left is to think of what to fill the window boxes with that will look like plants PMSL.

It's true. My dearest dearest daughter is a complete geek!! She loves this stuff lol. This is what she finished up with yesterday.

 

[Squeezyweezy]

Sorry the last couple of days have been utter poo!! The great british public never fail to astonish me with their total ignorance and rudeness. No wonder your feeling terrible.

Like Caroline said, you need to focus on the positive. J did so well after the swimming fiasco and thats all down to you and your shear hard work.

The house is looking great, can't wait to see the finished article. I love all that sticky back plastic, blue peter stuff! Enjoy some time with Sara, try and chill.
If you can help it, don't have a piggy day, you've been doing so well this week, would be a shame to ruin it because of an ignorant twunt at the shops!

 

[Legomom]

Had a really good day today. Finished Shakespeare's house finally got those groceries in lol. Without jamies help today!! In laws came for dinner. Cals seemed to stretch to cover everything so I haven't been hungry. Scales are being friendly. I even had pudding. So it's all good in the hood lol

Just for you squeezy!!!

 

[Legomom]

Lol just been recapping my lil journey on another thread? With all the regaining and losses and regaining etc I estimate I've lost over 9 stone in three years PMSL. When I get to goal THIS BLOODY TIME I'll have lost 11st6 in total. Granted I will have lost the same three stone THREE DAMN TIMES hahahaa !!!! in actual body weight changes I'm hoping to go from 17 st at my fattest to 11st summat... probs 6ish. So a total of 5an a half stones. I'm just a smidgen over 14 now. so three stone lighter than my chubbskiest but two stone heavier than last summer.

Complicated shizzle I know but it's tickling me that my total losses over three years EQUAL MY ENTIRE GOAL WEIGHT!!! I think. If the math hasn't failed me!!!!

 

[Squeezyweezy]

Wow, very impressive house. Sara should be one happy bunny, it looks great!

 

[NumNums]

That wee house is amazing!

Best not to think like that hun, you'll get there and we're all here to support you and kick you in the butt if you get the munchies.

x

 

[Caz]

Morning Tina, your loss this week is fantastic!! Hope you're really pleased with that. The house is looking great, I'm very impressed.

 

[Legomom]

Morning Tina, your loss this week is fantastic!! Hope you're really pleased with that. The house is looking great, I'm very impressed.

I am that's a stone off, under the 14's mark (just barely by .25lb lol but dammit I'm under) AND I've got into my old 14 jeans today

So feeling rather smug with my 3.5lbs lol. I'm averaging 1.5 a week now which I'm happy with!!!

 

[Squeezyweezy]

You should feel smug, thats amazing. Well done Tina xx

 

[Legomom]

Oh my god I'm utterly smitten with baby lukas. Had my first real munch of him today he was attached to too many wires last time lol he's so titchy!!

Had a funny old day really. Living on graze boxes and a salad from m&s coz I didn't plan it very well. My friend gave me a box of posh chocs as a thankyou for having her daughter while she was hospitalised. I've loosed the kids on them hahahaa ........soon there will only be the coffee ones left!!!

Is it awful that I'd rather feed chocolates to the kids than eat it myself ?? They had two each. And another one has been promised when rooms are tidy!!

Making a chilli for tea mmmmmm!!! I'm a bit low on veggie portions today as I'm using a jar sauce so I'm chucking some corn and left over pepper strips in to try an boost it! (trying to empty the cupboard and freezer of diet foods so I can start cooking more from scratch)

 

[Squeezyweezy]

Sounds like a great day even if it wasn't planned very well. Glad you finally got that cuddle with baby Lukas.

 

[Legomom]

Sounds like a great day even if it wasn't planned very well. Glad you finally got that cuddle with baby Lukas.

I actually wanted to steal him and run!!!! My ovaries are begging me to use them again hahahahahaaaa!!!! Cursed things!!


I want to make glazed lemon pepper chicken Tomorow. It looks so yum in my low fat cook book. Loooook I'm far too lazy to type it up tonight. You can all squint at the photo of the book for now!!

 

[Squeezyweezy]

mmmmmmmmmm, no squinting necessary. Looks fab!

 

[Legomom]

Off to aqua fit got a night out fri at an all you can eat place in wolverhampton. Don't really want to go as I've been quite strict now for the last 7 weeks and I'm scared that all you can eat is a bad idea!!!! Lol. Going to try and get a few good burns in this week now kids are off school think I've got two aquafit and I will try for a couple of lengths sessions too. But if not I can do some zumba at home.

 

[NumNums]

Enjoy aqua fit hun, supposed to be really good. Glad you got cuddles with Lukas too .