Unthoughtful people!

[ColJack]

Dear G.K.
Please sod off and retire already you old git.
You retired a month ago, got your £350 whip round from work and were back 2 weeks later on the agency.
You're taking jobs off us young folks who still have a mortgage and no pension.
Failing that, I want my £5 back. You can't have your cake and eat it too.

Sent from my iPod touch using MiniMins

 

[Viixenx]

Dear nan. (unfortunatly)

I still cant forgive you for sticking up for your internet boyfriend (of only 2 weeks at the time), when he was in my face threatening to punch me after I voiced my opinions on the fact i didnt trust him, and for all the strain youve put on my mum,

I will never forgive you., and all christmas reminds me of is that moment.
My mum is the best mum in the whole world, and luckily for me, she is NOTHING like you. Shes worth a million.

 

[MadameLaMinx]

Dear possessions,

Having been with me for a while now, you must surely have come to realise that I am a hopeless homemaker and that having a family of hoarders makes my job impossible. Therefore, can you please put yourselves away in future so I can concentrate on the more important things in life, like my navel. Cheers.

 

[kerry b]

Dear car.

Why oh why did you have to choose this frosty morning to allow your heating system to pack up? I appreciate you leaving me heating on setting 4 I really do but it is so noisy the kids kept crying so I had to drive with the window open to prevent the windscreen misting up. 2hrs later I can just feel my toes again. No doubt we will all end up ill through driving with open Windows when it is 0.5* outside. Please be considerate when I take you to the garage and allow the nice mechanic to fix you quickly and cheaply.

Many thanks

Frostbitten toe owner

 

[Samprand]

Dearest Sleep

Why oh WHY - when my alarm goes off for me to get up for uni and I put it on snooze for 10mins - do you let me have the most vivid dream about BEING at uni, half NAKED and haven forgotten my folder for my presentation this afternoon, all within that 10 minute snooze?!

For a few seconds after waking up I couldn't quite figure out if it had really happened or not, so I spent the first 30seconds lying in bed looking up at the ceiling trying to figure out where my folder could be

Don't do it again...it was weird

Sammy x

 

[elb4160]

Dear me,

I am fully aware that we are not well and full of a horrible cold, but it was not helpful to have a coughing fit (phlegm and all!) while on the phone to a recruitment agency trying to get a job interview!

Love,
Still poorly Emma

 

[moonwatcher]

Dear open fire

I love your crackly noises, the welcoming flames and warmth, the romantic light you throw upon the room (aaahhhh!). I even like the wood-smoke smell you leave in the house. Why can't you clean yourself out though, and if you could manage to do so without filling the whole room with dust, then that would be even better! My knee and ankle really can't take all the kneeling since my rather spectacular landing on the town pavement two months ago!

Yours (painfully)

 

[kingleds]

Dear Mum (Yes, her again)
Stop having a go at Emma for the way she raises her kids. I defy anyone to have 4 perfectly behaved all the time children, especially when one is severely handicapped. Besides, when you live in as big a glass house as you do you should DEFINITELY NOT be throwing these kind of stones. Go polish your black kettle you old.:dragon:

And breathe.......

 

[Cheekypasterfield]

Dear 'Friend'

Why is it that when I'm losing weight you are very thoughtful, cooking me lovely healthy meals and not baking cakes but....... Now I've reached goal you seem to want to 'fatten me up' by baking cakes, cooking high fat meals and offering me chocolate!!

I wouldn't mind but you keep saying you're on a diet!!!

 

[juicygooseface]

dear annoying old lady at work,
please stop hammering on about every new little illness you have, its getting rather tedious listening to how your cold has become laryngitis or swine flu or the plague.
i have stayed silent for a long time now and it cannot continue forever!
yours stressfully,
me x

 

[Shirleen]

Dammit Mother,
If you aren't going to phone me when you are running out of milk please don't then tell me how you haven't had a cup of tea with milk for four days!!
Also I am not psychic and I don't magically know that you have run out of the syringes you need to administer your food.
I don't have in my diary when you are likely to run out of your top up feed either.
My life is busy busy busy and sometimes days go by without me realising, I am sorry, Sorry that I forget to phone you.
If I phoned you every day as I have in the past you would forget to tell me what you want, and if I kept asking you I would be accused of being overbearing.
So please cut me some slack and let me know when you need stuff.....phones work in both directions you know!

Your exhausted Dort!

 

[karnak]

Dammit Mother,
If you aren't going to phone me when you are running out of milk please don't then tell me how you haven't had a cup of tea with milk for four days!!
Also I am not psychic and I don't magically know that you have run out of the syringes you need to administer your food.


I don't have in my diary when you are likely to run out of your top up feed either.
My life is busy busy busy and sometimes days go by without me realising, I am sorry, Sorry that I forget to phone you.
If I phoned you every day as I have in the past you would forget to tell me what you want, and if I kept asking you I would be accused of being overbearing.
So please cut me some slack and let me know when you need stuff.....phones work in both directions you know!

Your exhausted Dort!

OMG I am not the only one in the world feeling like this

You do love them but what do they expect from us:sigh:

 

[Bunnylush]

Dear Sons who both woke me up just with their surprise quiz at 7.30 am...

No I'm not reading your joinery book,therefor have no clue where it is!

No I'm not wearing your new hat to sleep in,therefor have no clue where it is!

Oh let me check,nope I'm not wearing your new trousers,maybe they are in the ironing you couldn't be #%EUR$ put away!!!!

Nope I've not had your bus ticket either,on some 3am dawn swoop of your room,gathering stuff up,just do you can wake me and ask,I so love it,don't you know!!!

Dear? Sons,have you seen my sanity?????

 

[Shirleen]

Dear Sons who both woke me up just with their surprise quiz at 7.30 am...

No I'm not reading your joinery book,therefor have no clue where it is!

No I'm not wearing your new hat to sleep in,therefor have no clue where it is!

Oh let me check,nope I'm not wearing your new trousers,maybe they are in the ironing you couldn't be #%EUR$ put away!!!!

Nope I've not had your bus ticket either,on some 3am dawn swoop of your room,gathering stuff up,just do you can wake me and ask,I so love it,don't you know!!!

Dear? Sons,have you seen my sanity?????

Love this!
I reckon you were sat in bed wearing the hat, and the new trousers as PJs reading the Joinery book (gotta love those dovetail joints), and using the bus ticket as a bookmark!
Your sanity is in here!

 

[Viixenx]

Dear headphones..+
Why no matter HOW I put you back in my bag you always have the ability to knot yourselves, then I have to spend 10 minutes trying to untangle you.
(+ this also goes for christmas lights)

 

[MinkyDinky]

Dear headphones..+
Why no matter HOW I put you back in my bag you always have the ability to knot yourselves, then I have to spend 10 minutes trying to untangle you.
(+ this also goes for christmas lights)

Ha ha! Mine always tangle in my door keys x

 

[Shirleen]

Dear headphones..+
Why no matter HOW I put you back in my bag you always have the ability to knot yourselves, then I have to spend 10 minutes trying to untangle you.
(+ this also goes for christmas lights)

Tip for Christmas lights.... Tape one end to the inner tube from wrapping paper, wrap around the tube and tape the other end!

Headphones wrap neatly then place in a small bag or box, mine are kept in my iPhone armband, never any knots!

 

[ColJack]

Use a wire tie ( the kind you get with sandwich bags ) to wrap your earphones up with.
Wind round two or three fingers, pinch in the middle to make a kind of figure 8 then wrap.

Sent from my iPod touch using MiniMins

 

[Shirleen]

Use a wire tie ( the kind you get with sandwich bags ) to wrap your earphones up with.
Wind round two or three fingers, pinch in the middle to make a kind of figure 8 then wrap.

Sent from my iPod touch using MiniMins

Even betterer!

 

[moonwatcher]

Dear body,

Give me a break! I know I was distracted when I fell off the step nearly 10 weeks ago and therefore probably deserved the badly sprained ankle, painful knees and all the other aches, pains and bruises. I also realise that I haven't treated you very well for several years and therefore the ankle is under extra strain and will take a long time to completely recover.

Pleeeeeaaaasssse though, now I can get about reasonably well and can start some carefully chosen exercise again, did you have to choose now to land me with an excruciating bicep pain/injury. I don't even know how I did it, and to rub my nose in it you started the pain precisely 20 minutes after I had promised to knit a friend a pair of fair isle fingerless mittens to be given as an emergency present and I only had a day and a half to knit them!

Now look here, I knitted the mitts and I am going to continue with the exercise so you may as well just give in and take the pain away NOW.

PS: When I said 'Give me a break' I did not mean it literally!