Lol i love this thread and you lot are hilarious! Makes me really wish I was doing Slimming World, but not any good ones in my area.
I don't have anything to rant about today, just wanted to share the love for you all!
Dear Members of the Public
The organisation I work for is a police force. We employ police officers, you know those people in uniform and stripey cars who deal with crime.
We are not a one stop phone centre for you. If your street lights go out, phone the electricity board. Nor will we phone BT or anyother organisation for you because you don’t want to use credit on your phone and you know 999 is free. If the roads are icy because it’s the middle of winter drive carefully don’t phone us and tell us. We already know, weve been out in it and you know what theres not much we can do about the weather. If you run out of money after a night out we are NOT a taxi service and will not give you a free lift home. Youre probably confused by the sign on the car roof. Ours says POLICE, you need one that says TAXI. If your child is unruly and answers you back cos you take their PS3 off them ground them don’t expect us to do your parenting.
Please let us get on with the work we should be doing instead of dealing with your laziness
Dear husband,
I am cooking fish pie for dinner.
Just because you had fish & chips for lunch and don't want fish again is not my problem. Why didn't you have a sandwich instead at lunch time? Oh that's right, because you didn't want a sandwich and wanted hot food. you baby.
Fish pie is for dinner. End. Of.
Asking me what else you can have for dinner (again) will result in my telling you whatever you make (again). Going into a strop and saying fine I won't have anything then won't make me change my mind.
You want to start dictating what we/you are having for meals, then start fricking cooking them.
Thought not.
Yours,
Wife/cook/cleaner/maid/laundrette/generaldogsbody. (moody ***** tonight though. Thanks for that!)
Dear husband,
I am cooking fish pie for dinner.
Just because you had fish & chips for lunch and don't want fish again is not my problem. Why didn't you have a sandwich instead at lunch time? Oh that's right, because you didn't want a sandwich and wanted hot food. you baby.
Fish pie is for dinner. End. Of.
Asking me what else you can have for dinner (again) will result in my telling you whatever you make (again). Going into a strop and saying fine I won't have anything then won't make me change my mind.
You want to start dictating what we/you are having for meals, then start fricking cooking them.
Thought not.
Yours,
Wife/cook/cleaner/maid/laundrette/generaldogsbody. (moody ***** tonight though. Thanks for that!)
Mrs.S. said:Dear husband,
I am cooking fish pie for dinner.
Just because you had fish & chips for lunch and don't want fish again is not my problem. Why didn't you have a sandwich instead at lunch time? Oh that's right, because you didn't want a sandwich and wanted hot food. you baby.
Fish pie is for dinner. End. Of.
Asking me what else you can have for dinner (again) will result in my telling you whatever you make (again). Going into a strop and saying fine I won't have anything then won't make me change my mind.
You want to start dictating what we/you are having for meals, then start fricking cooking them.
Thought not.
Yours,
Wife/cook/cleaner/maid/laundrette/generaldogsbody. (moody ***** tonight though. Thanks for that!)
big bear said:Dear Mil
Please do not tell me how to bring up my kids. Take a look at your son...you really did well there didn't you? Enough said.
BB x
Taniau said:This happens at my house all the time Mrs.S.!
mrscullen said:Sounds like my OH!
acc said:Happens in my house too!
kingleds said:Tell me you're joking bb! After the way her son treated you!? I'd have ***** slapped her into next week.
Don't let her get to you x
To my dearest husband of 14.5 years. It would be nice on the odd occassion that you might compliment me on how well I am looking. I know I have lost and gained lots of weight over the years and you never once made any comment on it which was good when I was bigger but now I am shrinking you just might consider sending alittle bit of encouragement my way some time soon or else I will be gone with the postman!!! ha ha ha
with love from your one and only wife xx
OMG I could of written this. My other half hasnt paid me one single compliement in 10 years! But he doesnt say anything bad either, just his way I suppose
Isn't that preferable to what they usually reek of?. As does peaches, eat a few and babies nappy will reek of peaches!
Good luck x
Isn't that preferable to what they usually reek of?
Starlight said:Dear Members of the Public
The organisation I work for is a police force. We employ police officers, you know those people in uniform and stripey cars who deal with crime.
We are not a one stop phone centre for you. If your street lights go out, phone the electricity board. Nor will we phone BT or anyother organisation for you because you don't want to use credit on your phone and you know 999 is free. If the roads are icy because it's the middle of winter drive carefully don't phone us and tell us. We already know, weve been out in it and you know what theres not much we can do about the weather. If you run out of money after a night out we are NOT a taxi service and will not give you a free lift home. Youre probably confused by the sign on the car roof. Ours says POLICE, you need one that says TAXI. If your child is unruly and answers you back cos you take their PS3 off them ground them don't expect us to do your parenting. And dont report them missing when you know fine well where the wee sod is but you cant be bothered getting off your lazy backside to get him and hes refusing to come back from his mates. Were not babysitters!
Please let us get on with the work we should be doing instead of dealing with your laziness