finally taking control of my body

[elm]

Played tennis even when I was exhausted! Woohoo!

 

[elm]

Played tennis!

 

[elm]

6am circuit toning class



Man those 4:30 in the morning arguments with yourself can be brutal when trying to motivate yourself to get up and go work out instead of sleeping for another 2 hours.

 

[elm]

6am circuit toning class:



Motivation > sleep

 

[elm]

Yeah tomorrow morning I'm going to see if I have skin cancer -_- this is such an odd feeling.

 

[elm]

There's this class called Total Conditioning that I have been avoiding because it's like crossfit and I'm not fit enough right? So on the schedule it says Sculpting. But I came in and there's like 7 of them and the trainer is asks me if I'm looking for something and I said yeah the sculpting class and he said he doesn't know why they haven't changed it yet but this is the total condition class...I got hella intimated. So I was like oh okay never mind I'll just leave and he's like nooo and then all 7 people were saying "noooo stay and try it" and I see what they're doing and I'm like I'm gonna f**king die. So I decide to stay. Holy sh*t I thought circuit toning was bad because you're constantly moving? Nope! This is much worse. Because it's a smaller class, he pushes you more and sees everyone. So anyway, I made it for 10 minutes and left. But in class, they were all motivating and welcoming me and encouraging. As I was leaving, one of the ladies said I should come back because it's only them 7 and there's a new girl for 2 weeks and she said she's improved. So...I might be going back and have a goal of making it for 60 minutes. Anyway, after that 10 minutes, I did running/walking for 15 minutes




Time for my appointment with the Dermatologist.

 

[elm]

Holy sh*t that hurt. She said it could be fungus(she looked at my eyes and feet and nothing so it's not that), dry skin(but not likely), and skin cancer. So she took a sample and I'll be back in 2 weeks.

 

[elm]

Zumba and turbo kick!

 

[elm]

6AM circuit toning

 

[elm]

Well I overslept and didn't work out this morning. But that's okay because it's my 25th birthday! Woot woot!

 

[elm]

Turbo kick:



I leave the country in 11 days!

 

[tweekedgirl]

Hey Elm, you're doing great. How you manage to get up at 4:30 is beyond me haha. I have to get up at 5:15 for work and that's bad enough! Hope you had a great birthday and you hear back good news from your skin test.

 

[elm]

"When you care for someone more than they deserve, you get hurt more than you deserve."

 

[elm]

I woke up at 6:32 instead of 4:31. I slept through my alarms. So no gym. But I did just come back from walking my dog at the park.

 

[elm]

You can say Zumba kicked my butt.


I finished my English class with a B. Kinda mad because I wanted an A but whatevas. I have one more final on Monday and I'm done. I'm taking my next math class in summer starting June 2nd I think? Or 6th? I can't remember lol.

I leave for my trip to Bosnia in 7 days. No I have not started packing. Honestly I'm freaking out about the fact that my grandma won't be there waiting for me. Why do people have to die? I still cry for her all the time. July 4th will be a year and still not okay. Not even close to being okay.

Friday I find out if I have skin cancer.

Saturday I'm finally getting a hair cut, redoing my blonde streak, and adding red highlights.

I hate that I'll be going to Bosnia while I'm still fat and all. Ugh. I hope I can fit in the plane hahahaha.

 

[elm]

I Only lasted 33 minutes lol

 

[elm]

I don't have skin cancer.

 

[elm]

I keep crying. I miss my grandma. I can't believe I'll be in Bosnia in 6 days and my grandma won't be there waiting. My heart still hurts every day.

 

[elm]

Had a panic attack at 7 in the morning and full out crying session that it woke my entire family. Oops. But I miss my grandma and I can't hold my emotions back. I'm way too much of an emotional person. I have no idea how it'll be when I see her grave.

 

[elm]

Seeing PTO just made it more real that I'm leaving the country